posted on July 9, 2008 at 10:06 pm

neuman tramped along between the trees and ferns
it was a cold damp day ; already rain was spitting softly down
trees with the girth of small houses decorated with vines
boston ferns and elephant ears, fly traps and sweet red orchids
scraggly weeds caught half-heartedly at his feet
birds called somewhere faraway …he could never see them
on one side a hill studded with trees run up to the grey wintery sky
on the other a valley ran down to small clear creek with yellow sand
he thought he saw eels darting under black rocks
he thought he saw some small creature drink from the swirling waters
in front of him his brother max walked along
greying blond hair and a navy blue coat
neuman just walked and walked
seemed like he’d always been walking along in this place
he asked himself how he felt but found that he couldnt answer
he asked himself where he was going and he didnt really seem to know
max…he called out
max turned around slowly and stopped
he leant against a great moss covered green rock
which extruded from the undulating land
he brushed away some midges
rudy….? he said
max you can turn off the satori lounge now…he said
thats a good one… said max chuckling
no i mean it man said rudy becoming angry
turn it off max, turn it off now …he said
i cant turn it off said his brother rubbing his eyes
and i wouldnt even if i could……
neuman looked at the forest
he looked at the clear creek and the grey sky
at the lianas which curled and crumbled and strangled
he looked at the dark brown mud of the path
and the green and yellow stringy weeds
he looked at the dry dead ferns that crackled underfoot
and the serene pines that also made their home in here
what did this all mean…..?
this isnt the satori lounge rudy said max quietly
now what do you mean by that ?said rudy
i mean its not the satori lounge….thats what i mean
neuman thought bullshit! to himself
cmon max… he started to say
but his brother shook his head and started to walk
walk along through the trees and ferny hands of the forest
walking where and why?
just following on and on behind his brother in the gloom
he thought about the satori lounge
he remembered it did have a forest option on the settings
funny he’d never used it though
funny how the damn thing always had something new up its sleeve
max did you ever fiddle around with my alpine?
its not the satori lounge rudy… he shouted back over his shoulder
you did though , didnt you… neuman persisted
its not the satori rudy…….
did you or did you not fuck with my alpine settings?
max stopped
he turned around still shaking his head
he was blushing
i did i did play with your settings…
you little bastard…began neuman
but even though i did interrrupted max..this isnt that..
neuman was incensed
you imbecile!! he spat
thats it then ..said max throwing down his gloves on the path
thats what? said neuman incredulously
you find your own way out my dear brother this time said max
no you tell me what you did to my alpine
and i’ll know how to turn this off…
rudy this is not your fucking satori lounge….
no…rudy…this is…errr…a forest…
what?….where….why….what do you…..
max got angry now :..dont ask me…im the imbecile remember!
they both stood there next to the green lichened boulder
that had rolled from who knows where
and who knows how long ago just
to be sitting here on the side of a hill within a deep forest
max had a flask of hot chocolate and a tiny cup
dont ask this imbecile for a drink he said to neuman
cmon max…i’m sorry ok….?
bullshit youre sorry just want some hot chocolate…
he poured neuman a cup ….there you go old pal
neuman tasted it and made a face
i cant believe youve got the gall to complain about my hot chocolate!
..and i cant believe you fucked around with my alpines
after i explicitly told you not to! neuman replied
this is not satori lounge said max
then pray tell me max…what is it?
well rudy the truth is we are mixed up in some russian civil war
a few hundred years back
and we are deserters fleeing home…
neuman felt dizzy
he asked the question again into the still air
what did you do the alpine settings?
and once more max neuman answered him
in a cold steady sane voice
the voice of reason and truth
this is not satori lounge!

how heyday was recorded in a ukrainian village in 1820

15 Responses to “at the great gates of kiev”

  1. avatar
    eek | 9 July 2008 at 11:59 pm #

    Uhoh. Apparently Max and Rudy have themselves in quite a pickle! The sibling rivalry just oozes out of this one.

    how heyday was recorded in a ukrainian village in 1820

    You are such a tease!

  2. avatar
    Brien Comerford | 10 July 2008 at 12:49 am #

    The 2002 digitally remastered version of “Heyday” has a much better sound quality than the 1820 Ukraniun village edition.

  3. avatar
    Cita | 10 July 2008 at 2:08 am #

    You are a terrible tease. You are clever in the way you tempt us with the Heyday stories. What have you got to keep from us anymore? I am sure after so many daily blogs it has all come out in one form or another. I think you just like to taunt us.

  4. avatar
    kat | 10 July 2008 at 3:24 am #

    he he. 188 years later, i order heydey from churchmerch 🙂

  5. avatar
    Anonymous | 10 July 2008 at 4:27 am #

    a hot drink from a little cup…is that “semi-vegan”?hmmm…

  6. avatar
    lily was here | 10 July 2008 at 6:00 am #

    Heyday is so yesterday
    Id rather hear about Rudy and Max (are they twins?)the story of the big rock (is there a story?) why Rudy didnt have a kenwood 🙂 and well, everything


    psst ..I’ve seen rare copies of the 1820 folk record going on ebay for much hryvnia. The cover painting of 4 bearded guys in tunics with exquitely coloured thread and fake sheepskin hats is divine.

  7. avatar
    fantasticandy | 10 July 2008 at 6:42 am #

    it felt like i was there!
    you ARE a clever bugger.

  8. avatar
    athanasiuspernath | 10 July 2008 at 6:54 am #

    I love that cover design Andrej Rublyov did for Heyday. “Heyday”, ukrainian ХЕЙДЕЙ is a rare folk instrument, similar to a bagpipe with strings. Still played today in idolated Hutsul villages in the Carpathians.

    благодарю вас, Стив Килбей!

  9. avatar
    Anonymous | 10 July 2008 at 8:58 am #

    Had they invented telephones in 1820?

  10. avatar
    woods.... | 10 July 2008 at 10:49 am #

    tricksy hobbits!

  11. avatar
    CSTCoach | 10 July 2008 at 2:47 pm #

    Wow, is it already yesterday? How time fries…

  12. avatar
    John | 10 July 2008 at 3:02 pm #


    Yeah. He’s just been fucking with us when it comes to “Heyday.”

    John Garratt

  13. avatar
    rick maymi | 10 July 2008 at 4:26 pm #

    What the fuck is ‘Heyday’ ?

  14. avatar
    Anonymous | 10 July 2008 at 10:50 pm #

    Who Dey?

  15. avatar
    knot | 10 July 2008 at 11:25 pm #

    where is my driver with his pistol in the glovebox?
    where my fur coat?
    where the lumpy buttery pastry made by the woman in the wooden house with blue shutters?

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