posted on January 7, 2011 at 1:24 pm

raining in my heart

sitting in tims backyard

ring the newspapers ! i turned up early for rehearsal

sit here taking a slug on my apricot nectar

i still wonder what its all about

life is bewildering us all

totally sick of ourselves

longing for some non existent future

or some imaginary glorious past

but we are in turmoil

we are in freefall

we are out of order

a huge lizard runs past my feet

it is a lovely creature all coppery highlights

out here in the suburbs nature more rampant

kids play in the backyard pools

cicadas sing in the backyard trees

the weather is a sultry hot day

i drive a long way to get here

everything goes round n round in my head

everything simply everything

and of course any thing any old thing

in my head theres no one home as i drive drive drive

my falcon sings smoothly along bridges and into tunnels

people on a 2 decker bus seeing the sights

oh i wish i was them

to leave me behind empty headed in this car

i’d turn up but no one would notice the difference

i’d strap on my new borrowed crimson 6 string bass

i’d play paradox or kings

the words would come come come

rolling off  that machine that gives them out to me

my fingers would know where to go

my voice would be the same

ah but i

i am on this bus this double decker bus

and i’m a tourist going down the hill in kings cross

and im some lucky mother who never had no problems

who never got rolled no di-lemmas from the uni-verse

but that is the condition

the condition of entry

the condition of man

the condition of earth

we should be so happy here

you were once so happy here i sing myself to you

but who are you ……?

you remain unknown audience

you take it all in

you loved my songs well heres my empty head for you

you shake it around a little

ok theres a brain rattling in there

sloshing around in its own transmission fluid

gently bumping up against my thick skull

but theres no one home theres no one home

i’m finally someone else and ive ducked out for a minute

a pleasant breeze surprises me somewhat

i awaken from one embedded reverie

gulp down me apricot nectar

a man is whistling somewhere over all these fences

his whistle has a strange vibrato

birds also whistle in plentitude

im sitting under a verandah type type typing

funny how you get blown off course

you achieve the exact opposite of what you want

you make the mistake again n again

you go back to the start feeling finished

me ? i’m on that bus in the sun

the moment lasts forever

that lucky tourist frozen in time

no money worries

never been married

robustly healthy

having a lovely holiday in sydney

parrots alight on some tree eating the berries

the raucous squawking hurts my damaged ears

its australia its summer  its the bloody holidays

wind passes thru treetops

but at ground level it comes after woods

i long to sleep some more

i dreamed a strange dream but now i have forgotten it

gone gone gone that dream and i long to still be within it

oh to vanish away like smoke in the mirrors

my eyes hurt

my head hurts

my back hurts

ooh time for yoga i guess

put this headache machine away

and cool my heels in something else

something i believe in i guess

115 Responses to “backyard baudelaire”

  1. avatar
    princey | 7 January 2011 at 1:55 pm #

    I was wondering who’s backyard you’ve been in lately. I love being a tourist in beautiful Sydney, but don’t believe for a second that we tourists haven’t left problems behind at home or unpaid bills or neglected someone or something back home….it’s just an escape from it all, innit??? Anyway, I’m counting down the (looooong) days til I’m back in Sydney in April, climbing the Sydney Opera House stairs to see the best band in the world play their stuff, yay! 🙂
    love amanda

    • avatar
      Jonny Hollywood | 8 January 2011 at 12:18 pm #

      take me with you…

  2. avatar
    Brie | 7 January 2011 at 2:09 pm #

    I love reading what you write.

  3. avatar
    Christine | 7 January 2011 at 2:17 pm #

    I love reading what you write too…

  4. avatar
    neptune | 7 January 2011 at 2:30 pm #

    I love what you write also …. mostly … on the good days. I hate it when you are in a bad mood, and write things that give me the willies … but that’s not very often.

    But I love, love, LOVE that Aussie accent` and love your good moods … and just wanted to say …..

    It’s very good to dream – You must dream — Dreams are good ….. Continue to dream ….. Don’t stop dreamin’ …. Dream on …. dream on …. dream until ……

    Heard something the other day that has been on my mind a lot … never heard it before – but it’s this — Your dreams MUST outnumber your regrets ………. MUST MUST MUST …. so keep on dreaming, you cute rock star, you!!!

    • avatar
      Narelle | 9 January 2011 at 8:31 pm #

      Interesting blog…..from a different perspective. Lucky the ones that don’t have bad moods. How is that possible?.. I get more peaved off now (no, really pissed off!!) than I ever did in the past (and it does bother me). Having said that, I would much prefer openness and honesty any day….no matter what!!!

      Don’t know much about why we dream except we just do. I agree, dreams are good, day and night, but nightmares are awful as you wake up feeling foul and rattled…….so thanks goodness I don’t do that too often. Last night I fell asleep with the idiot box on…….woke up about 4 in the morning and for a split second could not figure out why the Church were singing. Ah ha, Countdown was on and the clip was The Unguarded Moment….well that was OK (Countdown in the 80s….enough said) but the dream/nightmare that I was in the middle of wasn’t so good. Briefly, I was late for work as my mother was unwell, arrived at work and the place was a shambles. Then, I was unable to get off work early to go to an Ayres Rock concert. Distress levels were on the up and up. All my friends were going to the concert. Now Ayres Rock have not been around, as a band, for a long, long time.

      I do believe 100% that what you heard about dreams, outweighing regrets……. Thanks for sharing your thoughts……, may all your dreams come true……..and more………best wishes

  5. avatar
    Karen | 7 January 2011 at 2:43 pm #

    pensive look there
    bit sad but I feel a tad melancholic myself

    maybe I should take up yoga
    agree with brie
    love what you write

  6. avatar
    sarah | 7 January 2011 at 4:01 pm #

    ah the condition is human, indeed. its near impossible to know anyone elses experience. I would have to slip into you, and you would have to slip into me. we would have to swap to actually know the depth of pain of another. having said that its poems like this and expression like this that brings people closer to that swapping places. thank-you. very beautiful writing. I loved your past poems too. esp: the blackmail-sex-dream short story you wrote. but the energy of it made people very rowdy, so I never commented. great storytelling though. loved it. I think her outfit is forever burnt into my mind. lol. great story.

  7. avatar
    Onlyaride | 7 January 2011 at 5:07 pm #

    Does anyone on this blog know who Bill Hicks was ?? He is one of my favorite Human being of all time

  8. avatar
    Vincent Price | 7 January 2011 at 5:16 pm #

    Baudelaire was a very serious poet. He had a shrine devoted to Edgar Allen poe and was the 1st to translate him into French. The prose poems translated by Michael Hamburger are very good.

  9. avatar
    PINK CHURCH FLOYD | 7 January 2011 at 5:16 pm #

    I love reading that.
    I imagined everything like it was real.
    Driving alone long distance is the ultimate for personal space and time to go over so many things.
    Love ya Kilb’s xo

  10. avatar
    hellbound heart | 7 January 2011 at 6:18 pm #

    sounds like rain is set to fall again for a while…..
    the sun will shine again, you wait…..

    love always……

  11. avatar
    andy | 7 January 2011 at 6:38 pm #

    ‘tims backyard’…….
    should be a song methinks.

  12. avatar
    Lyndall | 7 January 2011 at 6:53 pm #

    There must be something in the air! – I’m having a bit of a flat day too… Take it easy – hope the eyes, head and back feel better real soon. Much love. Lx

  13. avatar
    Andreas | 7 January 2011 at 7:13 pm #

    Hi, I absolutely dig you with today’s blog. It’s strange how we meet people, for just a second (for instance, I’m sitting in an airport lounge right now) and wonder who they are, what’s their lives all about. All these people intersect with me right here, right now, and then they’re suddenly gone. We exchange a glance only now in the immensity of time and space… It’s like a karmic pattern where we travel in space and time, and every move we make changes the pattern and alters the future… I read something like this a long time ago in “One”, Richard Bach. It’s thrilling and mysterious…
    On a lighter note, each one in the “unknown audience” is there for you, so you’re definitely not alone (like that tourist probably is)….
    And finally, George Harrison wrote “Here comes the sun” while sitting in Eric Clapton’s backyard… I hope you get similar inspirations for another great song today!
    Enjoy your rehearsals (wish I was there to listen to Kings now!)

    • avatar
      stealth blue | 9 January 2011 at 1:35 pm #

      That’s exactly what I like to do whilst sitting an an AP lounge also. That usually can make the time go by nice and fast while waiting! It’s pretty interesting what your mind comes up with as far as back-stories, etc. it’s also funny when you actually meet someone and find out either how right-on or dead-wrong you can be about a particular individual! It just goes to show you, you just can’t “judge a book by its cover”…for the most part anyway.

  14. avatar
    Linjo | 7 January 2011 at 7:50 pm #

    Geez Steve, nothing can compare to the total joy and excitement that comes through a child’s eye. We just have to accept that wonder has been, gone and remember it so well. I look at adults that still seem to have that total joie de vivre. What is the key? Fucked if I know. Good health, a good partner and friends seem to be the go. I get dissolutioned by ‘friends’ all the time. Why cant they be as perfect as me hahaha! I tell ya, family is everything, nothing like family. A good autobiography, ooh excellent music, kids kids kids. Keep expanding your mind. A job you enjoy! and having your most devoted and loving cuddly dog sleep on the bed next to you! This is what makes this old bird happy xxx

  15. avatar
    Wilfred Paradise | 7 January 2011 at 10:52 pm #


    You need a reading from the Miracle Man from Virginia Beach. Am guessin you had a prior life in Atlantis, maybe ancient Egypt. Roll with it, my man, and get ready for the next one. This upcoming tour will lead to goo karma, going to be a good time. ah, ah. wilfred P

  16. avatar
    cymbal | 7 January 2011 at 11:11 pm #

    thanks steve,
    great imagery

  17. avatar
    Freddie | 7 January 2011 at 11:30 pm #

    A contemplative one today, seems as if you’d like to keep all your gifts but leave your identity behind somewhere. I think you need a long holiday someplace where nobody knows who you are, someplace where you can really lose yourself.

  18. avatar
    trick of the light | 7 January 2011 at 11:31 pm #

    You manage to capture all the incoherent thoughts and feelings that ran through my veins this afternoon. I sat on the bus on the way home from what I call my career, souless drivel it is. Something I once aspired to and worked so hard for. I sit on the bus – listening to some tunes from my misspent youth, passing by the old sites of my favourite nightclubs and places to kiss boys. I think of that gig The Church did at Lizottes a month back and the Echo & The Bunnymen one I was so lucky to catch last year.

    I come home to my beautiful just-turned-three darling and forget it all in an instant.

  19. avatar
    BROKEN TOYS AND HEROS | 8 January 2011 at 12:47 am #

    “Kings” , if there isn’t a more rich-textured song in the last 30 years … I don’t know. I , like many of us are so biased when it comes to select Church songs. But , like UTMW, Kings just gets in your head…clasping on your synapses…feeding, nuturing, teaching, and then its gone as quick as it had arrived. Take care Steve, have a great weekend, even though it doesn’t appear as so… I believe things are re-aligning themseleves for you and 2011 will be ‘Steve’s Year of Bliss’…I really hope so.

    If anyone is interested in seeing how my ‘avatar’ angel has grown, search on You Tube for “princess 214 reads”. She will be three on Valentine’s Day. She is so precious, as are all children. And yes, she does read-Spend as much time with your little ones…for they learn and grow so quickly, Heck…my son, Alex, will be 20 in 2 months. He will be sitting right next to me on 02/11/2011. He is counting down the days to NSEW. I think that may be one of his favorites, its hard to get that so out of your head…too.

    Have a great and safe weekend everyone…

    Darrin K.

  20. avatar
    bc | 8 January 2011 at 2:30 am #

    writing is top form…jammin/chillin with Tim. it’s all good.
    bon practiiice

  21. avatar
    david | 8 January 2011 at 2:58 am #

    oh my lord ..people may freak out at this show …

  22. avatar
    Cecilia | 8 January 2011 at 3:09 am #

    i long to sleep some more
    i dreamed a strange dream but now i have forgotten it
    gone gone gone that dream and i long to still be within it

    Deseo dormir un poco mas
    Soñé un sueño extraño pero lo he olvidado
    perdido perdido perdido y deseo aun estar envuelto en el


  23. avatar
    Tanya | 8 January 2011 at 3:54 am #

    Amen, once again.

  24. avatar
    Steven Krut | 8 January 2011 at 5:11 am #

    Except that that tourist whom you think has it so nice and easy is visiting Sydney with his mother. Yeah, he’s 40, but has never moved out of his parents’ house. He had a girlfriend once – the great love of his life – but she came out of the closet on their wedding day, leaving him heartbroken at the altar. After a few years of drunken depression, he got a job with the postal service at his mothers’ urging. He’s been there 18 years. He hates it, but it’s safe and reliable. He’s afraid to leave. He doesn’t think he deserves anything better. Sitting on the tourist bus, his hemorrhoids have flared up terribly. He shifts uncomfortably in his seat. When he thinks nobody is looking, he reaches back and scratches his butt crack. Then, gazing vacantly out the window of the bus, he notices a guy in a Ford Falcon staring at him. The guy has an envious look about him – like he wishes he were him. How strange. Nobody’s ever looked at him like that before. He thinks he recognizes this Falcon driver. Yeah, he’s seen him on TV. He’s somebody famous. He’s somebody who’s done great things. He imagines that this guy gets paid to travel all over the place. He imagines that this guy knows all kinds of interesting and wonderful people. Yes, he remembers now. He saw this guy perform at the Olympics. He makes music. He’s heard that he’s good at it, too. He imagines that there are thousands and thousands of people who think this guy is one of the greatest persons alive. Such a lucky bastard! He closes his eyes and imagines that he’s living this guy’s life. He leaves the postal service and forms a band. People cheer and go crazy when he plays. Women crave him. Men idolize him. Children adore him. Something new and engaging happens all the time. Such a blessed life! He opens his eyes, but the Falcon guy is gone. His mother elbows him. “Stop scratching yourself there,” she demands. “It’s disgusting!”

    • avatar
      ticktockclarice | 8 January 2011 at 9:23 am #

      LMAO Steven, you just made me snort milk from my cereal through my nose!! So true, the grass is never greener, be careful what you wish for, various other cliches etc etc….it does only seem to be my single, childless, stuck-in-a-mindless-soulless-government-job friends who can afford to do the travel thing. As for myself, it is a perfect summer’s day in WA, my mum’s having the kids, i’m off to do some laps at Freo pool then sit out in my garden listening to some tunes all afternoon (i’m sure some Church will figure in there but right now am obsessed with the Jonsi solo album. Is so happy and summery!! Wouldn’t be anyone else for quids! Cheers all xx

      • avatar
        lisa | 10 January 2011 at 2:21 am #

        Hey ticktockclarice! Good to hear you’re feeling so happy! It’s a perfect winter’s day here on the opposite side of the world, and I am childless today as well as my husband has taken them skiing. Just got back from a gorgeous walk in the snow…

        And, Steven– That was definitely one of the THE funniest comments ever!

    • avatar
      BROKEN TOYS AND HEROS | 8 January 2011 at 11:02 am #

      Holy Shit Steven that was fucking histerical !!!!

      That may easily go into the top 10 blog replies of all time. What do you think people? Throw love Steven’s way because shit like that is comic genius, excellent timing and delivery and the last couple sentences are epic irony. WOW !!!!!!!

      Darrin k.

    • avatar
      Jason (jmb066) | 8 January 2011 at 11:59 am #

      Bravo Steven

    • avatar
      curly tops | 8 January 2011 at 3:11 pm #

      nice one mr krut

    • avatar
      lily was here | 8 January 2011 at 9:50 pm #

      Love it other SK – thanx for the chuckle

    • avatar
      Cocoamo | 9 January 2011 at 10:55 am #

      That was so great! Me thinks we have the makings of a movie? or at least a sitcom. Makes me chuckle. Thanks for the smile.

      A Friend in Pennsylvania
      (Now in Cocoa Beach)

    • avatar
      stealth blue | 9 January 2011 at 1:54 pm #

      LOL!! Good on ya, Steven!

    • avatar
      hellbound heart | 9 January 2011 at 7:09 pm #

      very perceptive and very funny in a bittersweet kind of way….

    • avatar
      Steven Krut | 10 January 2011 at 7:38 am #

      Thanks for the kind comments, everyone. It was just a probably misguided attempt to cheer our musical blog wizard up. I’m glad people seem to have enjoyed it. 🙂

  25. avatar
    bionicanna | 8 January 2011 at 6:48 am #

    i’m sitting empty headed on that double decker bus, content as a housecat.

    tension, pain, sleepiness: transdermal magnesium has helped with these.

  26. avatar
    Lara | 8 January 2011 at 7:41 am #

    Baudelaire, but. . . all the poetry minus the syphilis.

    • avatar
      Narelle | 8 January 2011 at 12:56 pm #

      and as fate would have it….a massive stroke at rather a young age.
      Anyway, eat well, sleep heaps and enjoy the day.

  27. avatar
    post-punk rocker | 8 January 2011 at 8:27 am #

    Sometimes though, one has to wonder if the grass is really greener on the other side of the fence…

  28. avatar
    Once | 8 January 2011 at 9:51 am #

    Too right
    Mad fight
    Vodka and snakebite
    You were not made for fame
    And what it did to you
    Me either
    Methinks I’ve been given too much
    The password field is empty.

  29. avatar
    curly tops | 8 January 2011 at 11:25 am #

    i once climbed high ..and long…and it was a struggle..but i got to the top of the mountain and went to the other side and the grass was indeed greener..there i met my current long term girlfriend…

    huh..last was hot,still is hot, i put the airconditoner on and the tRIFFIDS DVD DOCUMENTRY ‘BORN SANDY DEVOTIONAL..a few minutes in a bearded man is on the screen, talking of love for the triffids girlfriend says..’OH MY WHO IS THAT MAN, HE IS GORGEOUS,WHAT EYES” ‘ ITS STEVE KILBEY” I SAY.

    • avatar
      thetimebeing | 8 January 2011 at 12:00 pm #

      really your girlfriend said that curly?
      thats certainly nice!

      • avatar
        curly tops | 8 January 2011 at 3:02 pm #

        yeah she did indeed say that,and being my girlfriend she must have great taste in men,hahah
        she,s beautiful herself…..
        …she said..”oh what band is he in? is he a friend ?”..
        i replied,”he is in the church,i was playing them today,you asked who it was”…
        “the one with the red cover?..shit is that him? im impressed,”
        “YEP .. untitled 23,its their best yet,i even have it on vinyl,they have other great records to,check out one called unseen words and unheard music,its just as great,and the guys a poet,with a cool blog ,worth checkin out,”
        “oh wow,he is gorgeous,beautiful eyes” she said as ya face came back on the screen,”
        “SSSSSSHHHH im tryin to watch this doco…”And i rewound back to the bits i missed….
        looks like you have a new admirer steve

        • avatar
          thetimebeing | 8 January 2011 at 3:17 pm #

          lovely stuff!
          whats her mobile number again ?

          • avatar
            curly tops | 8 January 2011 at 3:53 pm #

            youll start out standing,proud to steal her anything she see,s..
            but youll wind up peeking through her keyhole,down upon your knees….

  30. avatar
    Jasperina | 8 January 2011 at 11:27 am #

    Yoga is all there is…the way there, the way back and mostly the way to the centre…

  31. avatar
    cymbal | 8 January 2011 at 11:41 am #

    o how i enjoy the stories
    the visual carnival in my mind
    as if i’m there somewhere
    breathing in the time
    these eyes were opened
    like that ‘ol story of old
    the balance robbed me of my innocence
    unsettling more so as mid-life unfolds
    o if i could slumber and awake but again
    tabla rasa, regenerated, ready to begin
    one more time with the wisdom and not the sin
    i’d make it like i yearn it, believe me, my good friend

  32. avatar
    lily was here | 8 January 2011 at 9:52 pm #

    Raining in your heart. Sad to hear 🙁
    In the backyard of Tim’s – nice

  33. avatar
    Richard | 8 January 2011 at 10:44 pm #

    “ok theres a brain rattling in there

    sloshing around in its own transmission fluid”

    you really are writing quite remarkably at the moment St. K

    (and so are others here)

    I hope you’re finding the time to scratch out some songs

    reckon they might end up real good ones

  34. avatar
    Once | 9 January 2011 at 7:09 am #

    So I roll out of bed with my yummy boyfriend and put on the TV. Arizona congresswoman shot in the head in Tucson. (Damn Arizona, and the right to arm bears, I’m about ready to leave). Rally at the Safeway, can you imagine? You’re in the produce aisle, checking melons for freshness; you got the cart with the squeaky wheel (again), and forgot to bring your list…when suddenly (blah blah blah).

    It’s times like these that I say to myself, “Self? Quit yer complaining! Open your eyes and be glad for this day.”


    • avatar
      babbaganoosh | 10 January 2011 at 3:28 am #

      Its interesting that you mention the Az gun thing as if our constitutional right to bear arms is the problem. The real fact is that the current US regime under our socialist boy king has been trampling our rights and privacy, ignoring the constitution with the healthcare bribes etc, literally felt up my wheelchair bound grandmother the other day at the airport but demands extra terrorist rights (if they are muslim only, christians are welcome to abuse of course. it is only a matter a time until all this frustration boils to a head. But of course mentioning any of these obvious facts will assure me of being called a racist since our president happens to be half black. I am ashamed to say that I voted for him but also got caught up in the hype. I am truly afraid for the future of our great country. But I will be at the church show in atlanta so maybe it will all be ok. I have rambled on like that broken toys guy. Good chance it will be deleted anyway since it does not go along with the current company line. I also railed on bush a few times here but those were ok since it was fashionable to hate bush at that time.

      • avatar
        aisatsu | 10 January 2011 at 8:17 am #

        I do not believe it is even that, bbg. I think it is that words have power and violent words have become commonplace here. Talk of “reloading” and “second amendment remedies” are just symbolic talk for some. For most of us grounded well enough in reality. The danger lies in the symbolic and metaphoric, when used irresponsibly, hit the right spot with someone already at the tipping point. Violent rhetoric has been used about as irresponsibly as can be imagined.

        If there is a blog of thinking souls where the idea that words have power, have influence to be a catalyst for good or bad, this would be one of them.

        Guy was unstable. Guy was unhinged. He represented only his Party Of One. But undeniably, our brave new crosshair climate has now become catalytic. History repeats.

        • avatar
          babbaganoosh | 10 January 2011 at 5:48 pm #

          Interesting point and I agree and I thank you for responding aisatsu but your words sort of illustrate my point in a way. We are all locked into this party crap and it becomes win at all cost who cares about the county. Just from your statements I bet I can tell where you come down on nearly every issue. No offense to you at all but that is what our country has become. I will now describe your entire world view, please tell me where i am wrong and be honest, i dont want to offend, maybe make you think a bit. You watch msnbc, hate fox and its viewers, read the huffington post and more than likely comment on it. George Bush was a war criminal but you don’t follow the war so much under obama. More than once you have referred to the tea party as teabaggers etc. You are certain that man made global warming is a fact and anyone who doesn’t believe it is a denier or ignorant, obviously record cold winters are a sure sign that man is messing up the globe even though the earth has been in out of many ice ages long before man existed, not even open for discussion. The patriot act you thought was outrageous but now that obama renewed it and made it lots worse, no biggie. This recent nutbag was influenced by the heated rhetoric (of glenn beck, palin etc) but you immediately wondered how the army drove the fort hood shooter to mass murder while yelling allah akbar and worried about the potential hate crimes against muslims. Calling bush a murdering war criminal while active prez was not heated rhetoric, it is actually patriotic to stand up to a president like that although anyone who says anything bad about obama is more than like a racist or ignorant at a minimum. You may not admit it, but you deep down secretly hoped this young punk shooter had a very close tie to something teaparty republican etc. A glen beck book in his pocket with underlined passages would have made you orgasmic, sub-conciously of course. Strongly pro abortion, you feel the constitution is an outdated document that is ok to circumvent and change because it was written by a bunch of white guys who had slaves. Anyone who wants to seal our borders is racist towards hispanics but feeling up everyone at the airport is keeping us safe. on and on. My point is you could have mentioned any of those things and every other fact would have been the same. I should not know this much about you by one off handed comment! Sometimes there is one or two things slightly off but you get my point. And you could do the same to someone on the other side if they gave you there opinion on any issue. That was my only point, nobody ever asks what is best for the country and that is sad.

          • avatar
            aisatsu | 11 January 2011 at 1:39 am #

            I think you might have missed mine, bbg.

      • avatar
        Richard | 10 January 2011 at 8:55 am #

        I sure could do with the right to bear arms
        it’d be great protection against all the toothy critters and other varmints in these parts
        (and all the others who’d doubtless be bearing arms if it were their right)

        thank god that when all that frustration you’re talking about comes to a head there’ll be lots of guns to back up the competing points of view

      • avatar
        BROKEN TOYS AND HEROS | 10 January 2011 at 1:19 pm #

        I enjoyed your blog reply and the fact that you have a valid opinionh and was courageous enough to share it with all of us. But I do not understand why you had to take a shot at me, when so many others write what they feel and think in short brief stanzas or large paragraphs. Can you please not include me in any future remarks or comments. I never addressd you in any way, shape, or form. And I am not going to make an excuse for what I believe in or share.

        DARRIN K.

      • avatar
        TwiztidWicked | 10 January 2011 at 2:21 pm #

        Um, question babbaganoosh… what does Broken Toys & Heros have to do with your opinion on the Arizona shooting incident? You wrote “I have rambled on like that broken toys guy”.. what does he have to do with it? He’s a daily poster who enjoys to write a lot, why must he be included with your comment/opinion? Don’t you think that’s a tad bit rude to talk about someone like that? Yeah, the Arizona situation was very devastating and quite sad that an innocent congresswoman was a target of an assassination, and all of those innocent people were killed…. but… There’s no post/character count to how much you’re allowed to write on this blog, so he and others on here like to talk a lot and share their 2 cents, hence the point of, yes, a blog. I just question your motive on why he has to be “validated” in your post to question your post length, that’s all.

      • avatar
        david | 10 January 2011 at 6:08 pm #

        oh christ!

  35. avatar
    Thomas Thomsen | 9 January 2011 at 7:34 am #

    “What’s her mobile number again?”


  36. avatar
    Donna | 9 January 2011 at 4:53 pm #

    Steve – I think you’re gorgeous and have beautiful eyes. Now, shall i give you my cell phone number? LOL

    Seriously, I hope things are getting better for you. I see how your writing has been inspired by Baudelaire and Rimbaud, although your work’s not nearly as “dark” or cynical as Baudelaire’s. I never cared for Baudelaire because of this, but really enjoyed Rimbaud’s work in my early 20’s. I was going to school in Paris and Rimbaud’s poems resonated with what was going on in my head…both my emotional life and social life always seemed to be in turmoil…

    Steve Krut – I, too, enjoyed your story and had a good laugh!
    Andreas – I’m so impressed that you’re actually crossing the ocean to see The Church in Philly! Good for you!!

    • avatar
      thetimebeing | 10 January 2011 at 7:20 am #

      what was the number again?

    • avatar
      Lara | 10 January 2011 at 10:29 am #

      Watch out for those lurking film crews, Donna.

      • avatar
        Donna | 11 January 2011 at 3:08 am #

        Yeah, Lara, you aren’t kidding!! 😉
        Steve, you’re a good sport!

    • avatar
      Andreas | 11 January 2011 at 6:39 am #

      Hi, yes I have a great opportunity, I’ve had a business invitation in Philadelphia and I scheduled it for that date so I have the greatest of all lucks!!!

  37. avatar
    DavidP | 10 January 2011 at 12:17 am #

    hope 2011 is rewarding for you sk, internally and externally
    and that you can unravel some of what it is all about
    and find some peace of mind and peace in your heart

  38. avatar
    cymbal | 10 January 2011 at 1:57 am #

    Have a good day Steve.

  39. avatar
    Ingrid | 10 January 2011 at 10:21 am #

    I just want to add that I think your gorgeous too. You can have my mobile number if you want.

  40. avatar
    Ingrid | 10 January 2011 at 10:23 am #

    Also want to say that I really enjoyed this one. It sums up how I’ve felt this Chrismas and holiday season.

    • avatar
      thetimebeing | 10 January 2011 at 7:24 pm #

      dear everyone
      will no print anymore comments on politics or back n forth if its not related to anything to do with me
      limit your comments to the topic in hand
      or get your own blog!
      you have been warned….

      • avatar
        Lyndall | 10 January 2011 at 7:48 pm #

        Dear gorgeous
        I totally agree!!! I’m sure there are plenty of other places to debate political views. L x

      • avatar
        babbaganoosh | 10 January 2011 at 9:39 pm #

        Gee wiz Steve, I apolgize for the above on my part if it came off wrong but don’t you realize that for us long time fans everything is about you and the church. We measure our life in church moments. For example that shooting was a big deal for US fans and it is sort of inevitable for it to get mentioned and discussed. In ten years someone will ask, Hey remember that shooting, yea that was about the time i went to the church show where they played priest aura in its entirety. Fuckin awesome show. That reminds me, I sort of became obsessed with “feel” when that album came out. I picked my brother up at the airport and we were driving down the highway and I couldnt wait to play feel for him and got so pumped up that I got a speeding ticket by some redneck cop outside of mobile alabama. My wife was in the delivery room when they asked me to leave for emergency c-section, i was scared shitless of course and time was moving at a snails pace, tick….tick….I had back with two beasts with me and listened, i admit only half listening, mostly still worrying of course, last line I heard exactly when the nurse alerted me that it was all ok, “pearls are forming in the seas” I could literally go back and trace my life with similar moments starting with blurred crusade in college. Lines you may throw in casually to songs have piqued my interest and prompted me to read a book on the subject, especially the ancient references. See, i have gone off topic again. I am sincerely sorry and I promise to go back to lurking in the bushes.

        • avatar
          babbaganoosh | 10 January 2011 at 10:21 pm #

          Jesus, sorry again but i forgot the best one of all by far. Starfish tour show in tallahassee florida, place called the moon. Peter Murphy was opening. I was with a girl I had been dating for awhile and frankly we were through but neither party knowing how to pull the plug. She got into the murphy opener, i don’t have anything against him but he was never really my cup of tea. Church comes on starts rocking and about the third song only she demands, “its too loud take me home, now” to which I yelled, because it was indeed loud as it should have been, “go fuck yourself” Boy that felt great and that was that. Anyway got a little drunk at the show and hit the local waffle house for some grub. My waitress, the prettiest girl i have ever laid eyes on, you guessed it, my future wife i mentioned above with the baby although it took me years of chasing, almost catching, and then chasing some more. With that said strangely she never got into the church but I love her in spite of that.

        • avatar
          thetimebeing | 10 January 2011 at 10:49 pm #

          hey babba
          its all cool
          if you like back with 2 beasts then youre a friend of mine

      • avatar
        Jonny Hollywood | 11 January 2011 at 6:21 am #

        me and SK don’t like politics so keep your political views internal and not external thank you very much…

      • avatar
        blownmind 101 | 11 January 2011 at 10:11 am #

        A few points of clarification kind sir. I may have found a couple of loopholes. You said “everyone” Can i get my pet monkey to type it? You say “topic in hand”, if i write the word politics on a scrap of paper and literally hold it in my hand, am i exempt? What if i sign in to your blog as “OWN BLOG!” And also is there only just this one warning and if not how many warnings and what is the punishment? If you say a good flogging than you can consider me over the warned limit handsome. I do have a cell phone but it is one of those giant ones from the 80’s. People laugh at me not even realizing that with a little patience and luck it will be a collectors item. Also i need to get the “7” and “2” repaired.
        Love you and everything you do and that is for real!

  41. avatar
    davem | 11 January 2011 at 3:51 am #

    Steve – you know I have great tits but you never call my mobile!! 🙁

  42. avatar
    Simulacrum | 11 January 2011 at 4:48 am #

    “I will not print anymore comments on politics or back n forth if its not related to anything to do with me” Wow. That is very telling and sad. I think keeping the focus just on you is quite boring actually. Your loyal Flock will comply though . That comment about above about Baudelaire takes the cake:”although your work’s not nearly as “dark” or cynical as Baudelaire’s” Yeah right. We are talking about a super great Poet that towers above anything ever written on this blog.” Cynical” ? That is so simple minded it is offensive. Irony makes the world go ’round I guess

    • avatar
      thetimebeing | 11 January 2011 at 6:42 am #

      there you go knucklehead
      get yer own blog n you can do anything you like, cant ya?
      get yer own loyal flock n see how you feel about yer comments being irrelevant
      envy makes the world go round too, or what?

      • avatar
        curly tops | 11 January 2011 at 11:46 am #

        whew im with you steve all the way,,dont let it bring you down,cause we love yr whole ,words the whole shabang!!,(tho i wish my gal wouldnt harp on about yr handsome looks)..hahah….woke up this mornin ,logged on here,hoping for some of yr poetic words or lo and behold news of of a soon to be ‘jack frost” dvd..or the church announcing the oz leg of the 3 albums in one night tour and..umm..well..wot the fuck is goin on man??….im here for the rocknroll baby..and all the poetic artisic trimmings that go along with it… really have enjoyed spending quater an hour or so reading ya stuff here each day..its generous and its all for the goodness of the right reasons, today,right now,as i burst on your blog im dissapointed to see unnecessary personl “put downs” here,thats not in the spirit of what you offer us here is it. but shit,if it comes down to it im in your corner steve, and the gloves are off……ya not getting my girlfreinds phone number tho..
        but fuck yeah…every bubbling bird brain wanting to split spleens over silly stuff like usa politics,fairy floss and personal shit slingin should get their own blog and knock themselves out…

    • avatar
      Donna | 11 January 2011 at 10:07 am #

      Hello, Simulacrum…”that comment about above about Baudelaire takes the cake”. Gee…I’m sorry you don’t like it! I agree with you that Baudelaire is one of the great French poets. Doesn’t mean I have to like him. Not my taste. You are incorrect though, when you say he is not “cynical”. It’s what he’s known for. Try reading “Au Lecteur”. If that’s not cynical, what is it? You don’t have to answer.

  43. avatar
    Jason (jmb066) | 11 January 2011 at 7:10 am #


    I dont even know why you let these clowns get to you, I am pleased that you have asked the political and personal bashing to stop. I come here to get away from that kind of drama. You already know why they dont get their own Blogs, no one would read them. So on a lighter note how is rehearsal going? I cant even imagine the amount of time and energy you guys are spending to get these songs ready. One month to go before the concert of a lifetime.

    See you in Chicago,


  44. avatar
    Heather daydream | 11 January 2011 at 7:28 am #

    Agree with all on SK II’s reply comment – it’s a goodun. Agree with Sarah on the energy that the strap scene created – I also just watched (hehe). Agree with SK the First on blog culture – I come here to read what SK writes – get your own blog you lazy persons.
    Baudelaire’s my bed side book – Random quote: “the Chinese can tell the time in the eyes of a cat”

  45. avatar
    Mavellous | 11 January 2011 at 9:11 am #

    Have I gone mad, SK?
    Last night I read your latest blog entry “the year my life broke”.
    This morning I log on to re-read it (it really struck a chord) and now it’s gone???

    Either way, hugs from me too, ok?

    • avatar
      Shoffy | 11 January 2011 at 12:20 pm #

      I read it this morning, it was great but when i went to click on the comments, it dissappeared. Was it there at all?? Nothing on this blog is as it seems?

      • avatar
        Narelle | 11 January 2011 at 10:45 pm #

        It was there alright and it was brilliant….ratbaggery and sculduggery… poetry…..although, possibly not suitable for prime time knucklehead viewing. Good decision maybe…..for The Time Being

  46. avatar
    Broken Dreams and Shattered Lives | 11 January 2011 at 9:11 am #

    Hello Steve, I have been here with you the whole time brother and of course you need rules and stuff. Shit i remeber the original wag and that weird guy from sheffield and comerford and mission would roll in with some deep shit. It was more of an intellectual haven with some ninnies thrown in of course. Shit man, some of your best shit was free forming in the comments right along with everyone. The hardest i ever laughed was a simple two word comment from you. You were having a bit of money problems and someone wrote about a nine paragrapher about how you can be successful forming a boy band with t shirts or some such shit. It was a long process and you replied. “sounds easy”. And then everyone had an idea about you getting rich and you came on a chewed the whole bunch of us out. I know it is none of my business, hell man its your show. But with the strict rules and all that in a way the intelligent people are almost discouraged and the ninnies encouraged. Imagine someone inviting you over for dinner for some good eats and conversation and the invite says, we will talk about topic x and you must stay on topic. You’d tell them to get fucked. Only dimwits would show up to that party man. Look above, some guy is using a fake name to defend his other name and he comes on every day with nothing to say. The comment above by steven was definitely a gem but commonplace in the past. Jasperina used to roll in all the time with some groovy vibes but her stuff now gets lost in a sea of nice legs, your gorgeous, sitting here with my yummy boyfriend. I agree fuck the politics but a few comments sprinkled about is fun. That dude above did go overboard a bit above but man he had a point to make and the persons response was you were wrong. Just the fact that there was nothing specific you know he hit the nail on the fuckin head. You really want this to only be about people who agree and are complimentary to you only and some horny middle aged women? And their cool too , THEY HAVE SOME NICE THINGS TO ADD TO THE BLEND. Quick, name the song the line in caps is from. Old crew high percenage, current kiddie crowd, low percentage. I will fukk off now.

    • avatar
      davem | 11 January 2011 at 5:36 pm #

      I’ll name that tune in one.
      But it’s good things, not nice things.
      One of my top 5 Chrunchie tracks, bought it on import as soon as it came out all those years ago. The wonderful, A Month of Sundays.

  47. avatar
    Once | 11 January 2011 at 11:22 am #

    Ummm…okay. In other (relevant to this site, sorry I brought it up) news…which city should I go to, to see the Church this year?? I work in travel – free tikkies, so anywhere in the States is fairly accessible, travel by thought travel by thought)…oh, and Steve? You truly ARE gorgeous, and I don’t ever fawn over anyone (publicly, anyway, except maybe Ricky Martin, cuz he’s “safe”)…you’re definitely the cat’s tho…


    Live from Phoenix…it ain’t about me…

    • avatar
      BROKEN TOYS AND HEROS | 11 January 2011 at 1:38 pm #

      I suggest Chicago, at the Park West venue. The sound is incredible. Their is not a bad seat in the house and there are many great places to dine just minutes away. The Church have played there a couple of times in the past 5 years , acoustic shows. This will be the first time that they will all be plugged in and ready to tear the roof off the place. I, along with my 20 yr old son and close friend Ben (Stealth Blue) and his wife will be in a reserved booth- complete center- only a hand full of feet from the stage. I believe there still wmay be tix available, the downside to such a great place and city is : it will be on 02/11/2011, and IT WILL BE VERY COLD OUTSIDE. But we would love to have you visit.

      Darrin K.

      • avatar
        Jason (jmb066) | 12 January 2011 at 7:20 am #


        How did you get reserved seats? My tickets say general admission and from the seating chart diagram it did not look like there were any special seats or sections. First time to the venue from Detroit so any advice on what time to get there for good seats etc would be appreciated. I have sat front row at the Magic Bad here in Detroit for the last 4 shows and would love to do the same for this show of all shows.



        Oh and Steve dinner is on the wife and if you can get some front row seats. Just say the word.

      • avatar
        Once | 14 January 2011 at 11:03 am #

        Thanks, Darrin! I lived in Chicago for a few years, been to the Park West twice (Beautiful South and Lloyd Cole, with my now-ex – he’s from London and dragged me to many Brit-band shows, for which I am now grateful). Nice venue, although it can get extremely hot…I almost passed out at the Lloyd show (not from ingesting any substances, the temp was just extreme); but then, that was many years ago, and I am quite used to extreme heat these days.

        I LOVE Chicago, haven’t been there in years. If I decide to go, I will post my email addy instead of cluttering up the blog of the object of said viewing, listening and feeling. I am now leaning towards San Francisco, though – shorter flight (less risk of weather delays in Feb), and I have a friend up there who I haven’t seen in a while…(besides, we should have full coverage, no?) We shall see.

        Take care, mate.


        • avatar
          Once | 14 January 2011 at 11:09 am #

          ** Anyone out there going to the SFO show, please advise, would love to meet ya…Phoenix is a bit of a cultural wasteland, so I will most likely be traveling alone **

  48. avatar
    eekie | 11 January 2011 at 11:44 am #

    eekie’s Church Excursions are my get-to-become-that-tourist moments. For a few days every year (well, every year you tour here) I get to leave behind my stress and worries. It’s a lovely, free feeling, and often I wish I could just keep on driving instead of going home.

    But it’s our life experiences and how we react to and deal with them which make us who we are. When it comes right down to it I suspect in the long term neither of us would really be happier being that tourist.

  49. avatar
    Once | 11 January 2011 at 12:27 pm #

    Oh, and hello, BDASL. (rather dramatic, that). I am not a middle-aged horny woman…well, wait…I guess I AM middle aged (46), and am definitely a woman..AND! (I’ll come clean, mate) the ‘boyfriend’ is in Asia 75% of the time, so I hardly ever see him.

    BUT! I don’t come to this site to stalk, or to “be sexy”, or to do anything other than listen to, be affected by, and respond to, Steve’s thoughts. The fact that I have access to the thoughts of such a great artist astounds me.

    I am grateful.

    That is all. Really.

  50. avatar
    questionitallandthendie | 11 January 2011 at 2:03 pm #

    Hello, I am a 27 year old female, enjoy walks on the beach, bondi beach residents, men with a pulse or head, love country music and candlelight dinners, not really a fan of art or poetry, adore Steve Kilbey, crocodile dundee, oliver stone, barry goldwater look-a-likes, small barnyard animals, Love nascar especially Jeff Gordon, race em and wreck em wooo! and did i mention dreamy steve kilbey. Would love to see australia and of course france since they are so close, or even tobaggo, and one of those cute little monkey things that eat the upuculiptis leafs. If ANY one of these things describes you we may have a match, give me a call, i’m waiting here in sunny cleveland oh for my dream man……….

    2.99 a minute, 25.00 minimum. spanish language welcome.

  51. avatar
    thetimebeing | 11 January 2011 at 3:03 pm #

    a quick note to the rather silly envious noodle who sends me mucho nasty comments :
    dude get yourself a new internet connection because my program here shows me that its all coming from the same little jerk and subsequently will be deleted. from now on, ok. so post from somewhere else n see if you can trick me
    i hate to think of you putting all your “cleverness” into writing your miserable jealous tripe and no one not even me ever reading one
    bye for now
    your hero whom you cherish so highly verily your love has turned to obsessive hatred because you dont think ive lived up to some ideal from 1982
    youre pathetic

  52. avatar
    Karen | 11 January 2011 at 3:55 pm #

    agree Once” & Im 46 as well
    whats wrong with being a horny middle aged woman anyway?
    I love the poetry sure sk’s easy on the eye but we arent teenaged justin beber fans … ( not that theres anything wrong with that)…

    there you go a 27 yr old above ^^^see not only middle aged women
    bring on the poetry 😀

    • avatar
      Lyndall | 11 January 2011 at 7:01 pm #

      Good on you Karen – well said! Lx
      And Steve – I am pleased that you are putting your foot down – this is your site… I feel honoured and privileged to not only read your stuff but participate, put my 2 cents worth in and read others comments as well (which I often enjoy as much as the poetry). Unfortunately, negativity and rude snipes at other contributors often takes the joy out of it – sure we are not always going to agree with one another, and we are probably all at different stages in life/ maturity – my message to those that spend their energy criticising others is… “rise above it and move on”. Much love to you and all the wonderful people who share their thoughts and comments – Spread the love I say! From a middle aged (43 year old) horny woman Lx

  53. avatar
    ASSMIDGET | 11 January 2011 at 6:59 pm #

    The Hater will never stop. Know one myself. Can’t get you upset, they go for friends, family, pets, paint jobs,your internet (O; ect…
    It’s inward self hatred denial that consumed them long ago
    Ever discuss their flaws or regrets? nope, they cried themselves to sleep for years.
    Try love

  54. avatar
    Ingrid | 11 January 2011 at 7:58 pm #

    Hey Gorgeous One, isn’t it always the way – there is always someone envious of someone as successful and goodlooking like you. Well it’s also funny that that success in itself is its own revenge.

  55. avatar
    questionitallandthendie | 11 January 2011 at 9:38 pm #

    On a serious note, I am new fan and this may sound stupid i hope not…On the upcoming tour will you be taking requests? I would love to hear the melodic steve kilbey pipes doing a sinatra song.

  56. avatar
    Ingrid | 11 January 2011 at 9:56 pm #

    Did I say that right – I meant it as success being the best revenge (against individuals that are jealous of you).

  57. avatar
    andy | 11 January 2011 at 9:59 pm #

    not sure….but i think ‘year’ is only the third blog youv’e ever retracted.
    all three were of the same ilk,
    bitter, twisted and stunning……
    ratbags indeed!

  58. avatar
    you're | 11 January 2011 at 11:55 pm #


  59. avatar
    veleska1970 | 12 January 2011 at 9:55 am #

    nothing to do with the post here, but i have to echo what’s been said about how utterly gorgeous you are. believe it or not, that was my very first impression of you when we met after the dallas concert in 2006. the only thing i could think of at first was that, of all the hundreds of photos and videos i’ve seen of you throughout the years, none came close to representing the real you in person. they don’t do you justice. you are a damn good looking man, steve. you are drop-dead fine!!

    • avatar
      thetimebeing | 12 January 2011 at 3:08 pm #

      good lord i appreciate all these kind comments from the ladies concerning my alleged gorgeousness
      thank you veleska one of my longest n nicest readers
      i must say i dont seem gorgeous to myself
      i wish i did but i dont
      quite the opposite
      gives ya a bit of hope tho doesnt it?

      • avatar
        BROKEN TOYS AND HEROS | 12 January 2011 at 5:02 pm #

        Look SK-

        I am a heterosexual male. I am married and I find women to be enchanting and graciously beautiful, After following Tom Brady for years , I am an avid Patriots fan living in Chicago, I will comfortably admit that he is one great looking guy. And Killer, you would fall in the category, as …#1a to Mr. Brady’s #1. I can easily understand why the lovely ladies that fill your life attract to you like many bees to nectar. I am confidant with my manhood, and if I could ever get some sleep and lose all these newly formed wrinkles and dark circles, I was known to enchant the temptresses many moons ago.

        Just wish they would finish up that damn time machine already !!!

        Darrin K,

      • avatar
        veleska1970 | 12 January 2011 at 10:20 pm #

        you’re welcome. LOL~~you’re so cute. i can almost hear you blushing. 🙂

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