posted on March 18, 2011 at 3:58 pm

local popular aussie pop singer bib pectin

fuck!

i just lost me fuckin’ blog!

me bib pectin

i cant believe it

i’m so unlucky it makes me bloody sick

i mean my jaguars not getting any younger

and my charisma wont always be as strong as this

jig marlong from toonby-st claire writes

oh bib i love your song about the star filled heavens…!

it helped me over the rejection of my manuscript!

yeah whatever mate good for you…..

mrs norma frost of east kennel writes

oh bib you sexy old fool…!

yes love yes

i understand

its easy to be smitten isnt it?

meanwhile my golf handicap has improved

its a fucking gentlemens game innit?

i love to smash that little ball

the bleeding ‘oi polloi cant understand that

i play with some other top stars

with twice as much money

but half as much talent as yours truly

whinging on about tax havens between putts

get on the piss at the clubhouse maybe meet some divorcees

hi i’m bib pectin

divorcee : why of course you are…..may i call you bib..?

yeah mr pectin sounds ridiculous dunnit?

divorcee : why bib youre so much more handsome in real life

aint it the truth darlin’ i reluctantly sigh

i mean i’m a sexy strong fella but its not just about that

i dont wanna be used for my good looks

i’d feel cheapened

you gotta appreciate my talent

you gotta appreciate my struggle to become an aussie icon

battling the pokies in rsl clubs

sand in my eyes singin’ at lifesaving carnivals

that time i got a nasty shock off the mike

i got a nasty rash downstairs but no one would believe me

some idiot tuned my guitar up wrong

i forgot the words to some song

christ i dunno

its not all dancing on clouds

my agent booked me a cruise gig on some fucking liner or another

i vomited on the audience the first night seasickness

the second night i dozed off on the dramamine

then we stopped at a port and i got lost n didnt get back on the ship

luckily the geeza at the aussie embassy reckoed me or i’d have been chop goreng suey

thats some heavy sitch……right?

fuck all that doom n gloom

i’m going down the bungy bar for a sherbet with me mates

life aint too bad when yer bib

eh?

 

 

32 Responses to “bib day out”

  1. avatar
    Anakki Mayhem | 18 March 2011 at 6:16 pm #

    brilliant, Steve! thank u, thank u, thank u… it made me smile & was just what i needed after a long, long day! xxx

  2. avatar
    princey | 18 March 2011 at 8:00 pm #

    yaha-bib-i 🙂

  3. avatar
    hellbound heart | 18 March 2011 at 8:23 pm #

    just read your last few entries (my apologies for my absence lately-too many friggin things needing my friggin attention this week)…….very interesting reading the changes in your frame of mind from somber introspection to droll humor……my blessings to you, sir……..
    love always…..

  4. avatar
    Georgia | 18 March 2011 at 8:32 pm #

    HYSTERICAL
    I NEEDED That this morning Steven…Tack!

  5. avatar
    jaded | 18 March 2011 at 9:32 pm #

    right up there Mr K

    you can take the bastard out of bondi

    but you can’t take bondi out of the bastard

  6. avatar
    . | 18 March 2011 at 9:42 pm #

    it’s great to be bib!
    that ain’t no joke
    that ain’t no kid
    buy that man a drink!

  7. avatar
    Richard | 18 March 2011 at 10:25 pm #

    if you’re going to be a bastard
    you may as well be the sort of bastard people tend to be drawn to –
    a clever
    funny
    talented
    sensitive
    upset
    angry
    confused
    well meaning
    and basically honourable
    bastard

    the sort of bastard most of us bastards aspire to be

  8. avatar
    a different man | 18 March 2011 at 10:56 pm #

    this is very clever stuff

    was thinking about making a donation on the strength of today’s and (now) yesterday’s efforts

    or are you making so much dough now
    that you couldn’t
    bear alms?

  9. avatar
    Anonymous | 18 March 2011 at 10:57 pm #

    Oh Bib, you are larger than life you pillar of pectin.

  10. avatar
    lisa k | 18 March 2011 at 11:15 pm #

    Ooo Bibby, you’re the coolest!

  11. avatar
    Freddie | 18 March 2011 at 11:16 pm #

    Hahahaha…love it, a perfect start to the weekend bib…….bib pectin.
    :^)

  12. avatar
    aida_morgan | 19 March 2011 at 12:02 am #

    Haha, is bib your alter ego? Glad you’re you, SK

  13. avatar
    BROKEN TOYS AND HEROS | 19 March 2011 at 1:33 am #

    SK-
    Sorry I’m a bit lost on this one, inside joke I imagine. Over here in ‘ye-olde-states’, we have quite a collection of fucknuckles that you so delicately described in the media, papers, entertainment…that I/We could easily put a face on Mr. Bib from a collection of them in every city, state, coast to coast. I wonder if you’ve ever gone out and ‘smashed the white ball around’ – I imagine to say no. But can all of us on here reading imagine a ‘Foresome’ on the greeny grass of : Steve, Marty, Peter and Time…Wholly Shit !!! , the 4 of you couldn’t make it past the 2-3d hole without destroying the golf-carts, whacking ‘little’ white balls in all directions and causing insane mischief that the smuggy-smug club officials wouldn’t BEG for the ‘Fearless Foursome’ to get the “Hell Outta Here” !!!

    Back fired up really bad overnight, difficult moving at all today (Friday morning) that I need to be off of my feet and bed rest for 24-72 hours, yeah thats a long time friends…isn’t it??!!! Took my little one out so she can ride her “Pink Princess Starlight” bicycle yesterday because the weather was beautiful here (sunny in the mid 60’s). I wore my back-brace but the constant pounding my spinal column takes from each step on a hard surface is sheer torture, but it was worth it though, to see a smile brighter than the sun itself and laughter that drowned out all of the unearthly sounds in my neighborhood park. I’m just fearing the day that I can’t walk like that (and its only for an hour-or more). It will be so sad, can’t even imagine it and , hell its MY fuckin body thats failing. Oh Well, she was/is so happy though. She and my older son Alex, are my everything(s).

    Have a great weekend !!! and really missed reading ya over the past couple days. Maybe its hard to describe from so many of us, but your words are a medicine that helps us fight our daily ills.

    AsAlways,
    Darrin K.

    • avatar
      Jonny Hollywood | 19 March 2011 at 2:28 pm #

      sounds like drunkeness Darrin K…sometimes we write when we are drunk…lol

      • avatar
        BROKEN TOYS AND HEROS | 20 March 2011 at 1:19 am #

        Thats Funny !!! Hey, drop me an email an catch up on how everythings going in ‘Jonny’s World’ …

        AsAlways,
        Darrin K.

  14. avatar
    Shaun Hoffmann | 19 March 2011 at 1:53 am #

    Bib is a national treasure

  15. avatar
    mattyc | 19 March 2011 at 6:56 am #

    adoring fans! groupies! nasty shocks and rashes! lost at sea! Vomit!!!

    “rock is dead they say…LONG LIVE ROCK!!!!”

  16. avatar
    Tanya | 19 March 2011 at 8:42 am #

    Bravo!

  17. avatar
    Martha | 19 March 2011 at 9:50 am #

    ‘s what ya get for playing golf…

  18. avatar
    andy | 19 March 2011 at 11:16 am #

    is ‘bib’ a displaced cockney?

  19. avatar
    Karen | 19 March 2011 at 11:54 am #

    haha

    although I though it was Reg how many rsl playing golf old rockers are there?
    pectin reminds me of apples

  20. avatar
    Lara | 19 March 2011 at 12:05 pm #

    SK,

    http://broadsidedpress.org/switcheroo/april11.shtml

    Submit something?

  21. avatar
    mattyc | 19 March 2011 at 12:17 pm #

    “Nasty Shocks and Rashes,the Bib Pectin Story”, I’d buy it. Maybe even brought to the big screen with the vivacious George Clooney taking the lead role… and marketing, golfing clothes, children’s books, breakfast cereal, An Infomercial!

    Probably not…

    we prefer the singer, painter, writer
    poet
    the voice, the echo
    the yin, the yang
    fire walker,dream hawker
    hoarder, leaker
    audience, speaker
    skeptic, believer
    healer, deceiver
    architect, priest
    famine, feast
    the light, the shadow
    the fair dove, the storm crow
    wizard, warlock,
    cynic, adorer
    catalyst, agonist
    narcissist, pacifist
    moonlight fucked, sunlight kissed
    really way too much to list
    i think by now you get the gist

    yeah, I think we like that guy…
    moonlight fucked, sunlight kissed

  22. avatar
    Ron Bonham | 19 March 2011 at 12:36 pm #

    7 years ago tonite in Austin Tx you guys played for me one of my all-time-fave shows. Rolling it back just now, such power in those FY songs! Just a great great show, started at midnight and was over a quick 2 hours later. Thank you for it and all the others, they’re an eternal inspiration to these ears.

    rB

    • avatar
      BROKEN TOYS AND HEROS | 20 March 2011 at 1:25 am #

      Spot On !!!

      For me, or I should say us, here in Chicago. It was March 12th 2004 at the House Of Blues. That was a great concert. I truly miss hearing so many of those perfect tracks played ‘live’ . A tour that consists of The Church playing : ‘HeyDay , Forget Yourself, AENT or Uninvited’ would be incredible. But lets not get greedy, I know. The last tour should stand alone, as their greatest sounding achievement.

      AsAlways,
      Darrin K.

  23. avatar
    D.A. | 19 March 2011 at 12:41 pm #

    Simply gelatinous!

  24. avatar
    Anonymous | 19 March 2011 at 1:22 pm #

    well….for what its worth, i think you are far more talented then you are sexy. 🙂

  25. avatar
    Jonny Hollywood | 19 March 2011 at 2:26 pm #

    sounds like some kind of wonderful…

  26. avatar
    Anonymous | 19 March 2011 at 4:16 pm #

    the last time I heard something so, was a cabbie in London — I was trying to get to my hotel in Covent Garden… he understood me moreso than I could him. faith. I made it there. smart man, he was.


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