posted on June 1, 2006 at 6:27 am

bilbao
we do some interviews on spanish radio
sk despite all his sage advice on yon bologg
totally loses it when some git called armando
keeps screaming something in basque
in my headphones when we trying to record some songs
the second time he does it
i rip the phones from my ears n hurl em against the glass
separarating him from me
he runs off in a huff
he dont realise i got tinnitus
and that pain in my ears bypasses my rational mind
and sends me straight to angersville
fuck him
theres about 20 spaniards
all arguing with each other in the station
as they try to mike us and record us
spain is the land of argy bargy
at the restaurant we trying to determine
how vegetarian the food is
and eventually it seems we have the 2 waitresses
the chef
the owner
plus the dudes putting on the show
all yelling in spanish or basque or both
at each other
as angry as all get out
the argument dies down
but no body still is any the wiser
they all wade in again
people from other tables even joining in
i take a chance on a bowl of bean soup
and it IS vegetarian
phew
id have to say the spaniards and particularly here
in basque country
are the least likely people to be able to speak inglese
that you seem to come across in europa
(not that they should speak english, mind you..!)
i reckon youd even have more chance in hungary
of stopping some random geezer on the street
and find that he could speak english
than here
any waythe spaniards ask the same strange questions
they were asking when we first came here in 1982
whats the psychedelic scene in australia like(!!!???)
who are our influences(!!!???)
is it good to work with waddy wachtel…?
why have we come to spain
etc
then the quesstion about grant
did i know him etc
i suddenly get teary and very sad
ive become something of a walking eulogy for my olde mate
not that i mind, mind you
but just that it happens a lot
he was a beautiful cat i say
later back at the hotel
i chuck on a cd given to me by
sir lord count earl prince belfrank
of the frosties on kcrw in la
they just put us in a studio
and let us talk
and theres some classic steve n grant patter
that had me in stitches some 15 years later
i start playing streets of our town
grants going yes yes steven..we got that one covered
and just hearing his laugh when he asked me
who thought up the name jack frost
i say..well that was me( it was actually him)
grants chortle of outrage is classic
we do some great versions of some songs
grantley adlibbing stuff like
you should read my diary..
i dunno
the guy is never

far from my thoughts
so last night after dinner
(i had asparagus spears for dinner
it was the only vege thing i could find…)
timmy p comes up to mah roomy
we smoke some chocolate
(what the spanish call hashish)
we listen to exile on mainstreet
tim goes off to his room
i lie down n dream
im trapped in this terrible dream
it seems to go on all night
me n natalie living in brisbane
someone calls says grant is dead
i go round his place
hes there and moving around
but i can somehow see that he is dead
i implore him to stick around
god it looks so much like him in my dream
hes saying all the kinda things he would say
but steven, im dead now
no grant no
you dont have to go
im getting desperate
grant seems pretty calm
i go back home to natalie
in our shack one night in brisbane
i go back to grants
hes disappeared
but theres some strange guy there
taking grants stuff away
no no no im crying you cant do this
the guy ignores me
hes packing up grants guitars n stuff
i run off down a dreamstreet
grant dont ever leave me im saying like a mantra
promise you wont leave me here
eventually from outta heaven
or in my heart
i hear that soft melodious voice
no steven, i wont leave you
i feel reassured
its alright now
grants given me his promise
and
grant would never go back on his promise..
i wake up
a cold sweat
im in a spanish motel room
although the dream has tortured me for hours
i feel grantleys unmistakable presence
his calmness, his quiet quiet heart
wow
what a trip
i come down to breakfast
and write this blogg to you
lets speak tomorrow
sk

ps big hi to kitty kat up in darwin
she knows what a sad dream that was….

45 Responses to “calling sister midnite, what can i do about my dreams?”

  1. avatar
    CAPTAIN BEYOND | 1 June 2006 at 8:39 am #

    that was no dream me esskay, you were visited by me grant mc, funny how “partaking” can bring YOU closer to me Lord, have a great time tonight, we will be watching the show from above, peace out…
    Ne iko

  2. avatar
    Anonymous | 1 June 2006 at 9:38 am #

    So, what is the psychedelic scene like in Aus?? Inquiring minds want to know! And say hi to Waddy for me when you see him.

  3. avatar
    Anonymous | 1 June 2006 at 9:39 am #

    Hi Steve,

    just about to knock off from work and head home. Thought I’d check your blogge before shooting through and bugger me but theres a new one.

    Got to tell you I get a buzz out of reading your blogge and following your trails. Have been a fan since the crunch started and like all here think you guys just keep getting better.

    All the very best to you and yours, just know you make a difference.

    Luv Celticat

  4. avatar
    isolde | 1 June 2006 at 9:56 am #

    hello Sk
    sorry you had a painful dream partaking hasn’t necessarily got anything to do with it really, I had dreams like that for 15 years about someone I loved, before and after his death

    you can’t do anything about the dreams or being psychic or fey, but this dream is the resolution when the person comes to you and you both acknowledge they are gone, it just means that you have to live for him too now

    hope you get a chance to enjoy the guggenheim bilbao sometime, if you can get down to granada after madrid it is really worth visiting the alhambra, and the gypsy caves at night where the spanish folkies play

  5. avatar
    RA | 1 June 2006 at 10:17 am #

    Those dreams…. All good. Mind putting things in order like your hard drive de-fragging.

    What did I tell ya about the veggie food. I ate at a samll restaurant called “Arse” (I kid you not) in spain once. Asparagus was all i got too. Good asapragus though, with truffle oil and a little balsamic. Isn’t it funny the way you can smell the asparagus in your piss within minutes of eating it? Or is that just me? (did I say that out loud?…bugger..)

    Peace,

    Richard.

  6. avatar
    veleska1970 | 1 June 2006 at 10:20 am #

    those interviewers at the radio station were some pretty insensitive clods, huh? “did you know grant”….duh!! what a stupid fucking question. (i probably would have thrown my headphones at THEM for asking such a thing…)

    i had a very similar dream about my dad not too long after he died. oh how i grieved for him after his death, but when i had that dream, everything just seemed to very suddenly become easier. he was reaching out to me from the other side through that dream. and grant was doing the same thing to you. so i think it’s fantastic that you had that dream about grant. now you should have some closure.

  7. avatar
    RA | 1 June 2006 at 11:22 am #

    ..

    After my grandfather died i was in a rock club doing my rock club thing one night when a relative stranger approached me. Her name was Michelle. I vaguely new her face from the local area. She told me she’d just ben speaking to my grandfather. (!) I’d just split with a girlfriend and was a bit down. Her message from him was that I would be fine and that one day I’d marry a girl with red hair and be happy. (I did, and have two red-haird children to prove it).

    She then went on to say that he’d said I’d not believe her.. indeed…..so he’d said to mention that i was wearing his wedding ring and told her the story about the little mark inside it, which i could get verified by my father . He also told her a couple of things regarding his parentage, that i didn’t know and that completely stunned my father when i asked him, who then had to ask his mother, who confirmed the stories to be true. Michelle just couldn’t have known these things.

    What am i saying here?

    Well, I never believed in an afterlife, but since then I believe that our souls exist after we die. How or why or in what context, I know not. Either way, my grandfather came to me with a positive message. Make of that what you will.

    Peace,

    Richard.

  8. avatar
    12str | 1 June 2006 at 12:02 pm #

    oh man!
    been working like a dog for hours days,nights….gotta keep up with my bills…my computers crashed and everything has been shitty as hell…finally i get some hours of and fix my computer at last..
    had a couple of bloggings to catch up with..
    reading your latest stuff it seems to me that youre enjoying life on the road here in europe..
    you have a way of making me reflect on life with your music,lyrics and bloggs…
    for me man its pure inspiration..
    and i thank you!!

    all the best!

    12str

  9. avatar
    12str | 1 June 2006 at 12:04 pm #

    thanks sk!!
    for every word..
    for every song..
    for your time..
    life is good..

    12str

  10. avatar
    fergal | 1 June 2006 at 12:34 pm #

    i like your
    dead man’s dream
    sk
    ~

  11. avatar
    Paul W. | 1 June 2006 at 1:05 pm #

    Steve,
    Glad to hear that the tour is going well, and that you seem to be enjoying yourself. A while ago you offered to answer questions posted in these comments. You have often talked about being on and getting off the gear, and I was wondering how you had managed to kick the habit. But of course just as I was getting down to asking the question, you posted a blog that talked about your time in rehab, so there’s my answer to that one I suppose.

    Anyway, on a related note, I was curious as to what finally made you decide to give it up. Was there a single incident that opened your eyes to what you were doing to yourself and others? A culmination of many such incidents? So that’s my question. How/why did you decide it was time to end your little problem? And by the way, all of us fans are very proud of you for doing it, and we are all very excited and inspired by the possibilities that the “New Steve” can bring.

    -Paul W.

  12. avatar
    Anonymous | 1 June 2006 at 1:12 pm #

    Funny, I sang Quiet Heart last night at a gig for Grant…collective unconscious at work? A lot of people are thinking about him right now.

    BTW, SK and Grant, thanks for turning me on to Angela Carter. Great stuff. She’s become a favourite, along with Michael Moorcock.

    Allister

  13. avatar
    John Garratt | 1 June 2006 at 1:37 pm #

    Half of that sounds similar to dreams I kept having after my dad died.

  14. avatar
    CeciliaGin | 1 June 2006 at 2:44 pm #

    Grant will always be with you and like your gods and goddesses will come when you call.

    Headphones smashing against the glass
    Next time holler ‘MIERDA’!!!
    Right before the launch.

    I also had asparagus for dinner
    though I had the luxury of orange
    and yellow bell peppers.

    May I be your official translator on your next visit to España?

    Cecilia
    x

  15. avatar
    Anonymous | 1 June 2006 at 4:40 pm #

    hi sk
    que tal?

    focus on the
    last part
    of your dream

    ” i hear that soft melodious voice
    no steven, i wont leave you
    grants given me his promise
    and
    grant would never go back on his promise…”

    it’s true

    hope tonights
    dinner/communications
    are easy and delicious

    happy june
    love
    diane

  16. avatar
    CSTCoach | 1 June 2006 at 4:56 pm #

    After my dad died i dreamed about him like that every night for just over a year. now it’s only a few times a week. mostly about the last week in the hospital. it was all so sad and miserable. and about how, now that i’m starting to break through, he isn’t there to see it.

    i’m afraid i’ve never been able to believe in an afterlife. the bleak existentialist view of your light going out just seems more likely to me (i know we disagree on that, but you said in an earlier blog that you went through all these phases of belief too, so maybe that’s just the stage i’m on at 33). it left me with a really bitter feeling toward the world in many ways, and success lost much of its reward.

    my dad left a car behind, one that he’d sunk all kinds of money in on major repairs. i was driving it for a while, settling up his estate, going back and forth to my hometown. on the day that i had the documents in hand, on my way to sign over the car to myself (literally 2 minutes away from the place) a girl drove into me and totalled the car. I’d never had an accident before, and was nearly able to avoid that one. Thankfully no one was hurt.

    we had to scramble around and buy another car, which we could ill afford. But at the same time the old car had been making signs of some major repairs on the horizon. It was probably unsafe and would start sucking up money again.

    We bought a new car on March 17th at the same dealership in my hometown. When I got home i found the bill of sale of the old car among the debris I had cleaned out. The date of sale, with my dad’s signature, was March 17th, 7 years before. It really made me think. Today’s blog brought it all back.

    Safe travels sk. rock the house!

  17. avatar
    stealthblue | 1 June 2006 at 5:26 pm #

    Fuck Armando! Well, at least you are a sport, SK. On another note,I am sorry for the “loss” of your friend. Now doubt that was a visitation from his present realm.
    Keep it all in check, old friend.
    Thanks for the bloggs by the way. It is something I look forward to…taking in some Kilbeyism. Thank you whole-heartedly. Peace to you and the guys,
    Ben V.

  18. avatar
    buckmoose | 1 June 2006 at 5:45 pm #

    I had similar dreams after my friend Wendy drowned, where we were talking after she had died. In one dream she said to me “Mike, there’s something I need you to remember.” And then she says “The ashes of water…(something, something, something)” I rolled over, grabbed a notebook by my bed, and wrote down what she dictated to me. Except I really wasn’t awake yet (a dream within a dream?)…so then I REALLY woke up and tried to write down what she said but I could no longer remember the exact words.

    I spent the next several months trying to write a song around what she was trying to tell me, based on that series of dreams I had. Meantime, my girlfriend was pregnant with my daughter, and when my aunt proposed everyone guess the date the baby would come, I chose the date 9 months to the day after my friend Wendy had died. On that night, my daughter WASN’T born (yet) but my girlfriend and I did come home to find our firetrucks surrounding our house as it was being burning. I remember looking at the water dripping off the charred wood and then it clicked…ashes of water! My daugher was born a week later and her middle name is Ashaqua (ash+aqua).

    I’m not sure whether or not I believe in any afterlife…I usually just tell that story and let others draw their own conclusions. But several years later when I shared that story with a (later)girlfriend who had a bit of a Wiccan background, she told me that the dream in which Wendy helped name my daugher was actually an out-of-body experience.

    For whatever its worth, it sounds like you had a similar experience regarding GW.

    Or, perhaps it was just good chocolate. 🙂

    Michael

  19. avatar
    Anonymous | 1 June 2006 at 5:46 pm #

    same thing happened to me a few years ago when my grammie passed away, she came in the night and visited me. It was beautiful, it was reassuring it was stunning.

    Grant is still with you…

    FT

  20. avatar
    Anonymous | 1 June 2006 at 5:56 pm #

    Michael:
    I think Wendy was trying to warn you of the fire!!

  21. avatar
    davem | 1 June 2006 at 6:17 pm #

    Steve,
    After all the shouting in Bilbao I hope that you have a good one tonight. May they shout loud & long after each seductive moment from ULTC & El mom but it’d be nice if they could be quietened & left open-mouthed by your musical beauty at times too..I know I was on monday.
    The UK psychedelic scene from UK 1982 says “Hi” to Spain. Mood 6, Miles Over Matter et al send greetings !!
    I guess you’re really excited about seeing the nk n girls soon. After all the love you’ve given us on this tour you deserve to be back with those you love more than even the fans n friends n fiendss.
    I’m so blessed to have found this blog.
    Bless you. Love you more

    Dave M
    x

  22. avatar
    Queen Hatshepsut | 1 June 2006 at 6:24 pm #

    Steve,
    Well you know the Spanish ARE a passionate people…yikes! Asparagus. I guess I would’ve skipped dinner.

    Your dream about Grant sounds very common and normal, and from reading the posts, it seems like we’re all in the same boat here. After my grandma died (at 94!) 11 years ago I kept dreaming I was in her house, and she was sitting in her chair; I knew she was dead – but she didn’t. The really scary thing is that the vacuum cleaner was cleaning the whole house – on its own. I laugh now, but I’m telling you, it still scares me to think about it! It was like a Magritte or Dali painting come to life.

    Even ten years later, I still on occasion, dream about my dad. I’ve agonized over the idea of an afterlife since I was 5 (really!)…my dad used to say that death was like a lightbulb going out – the energy went somewhere else. Since he died, I kid you not – I have had more lightbulbs blow out – CONSTANTLY – in ten years than I have in the previous 29. The whole family has.
    Either my dad has a really boring way of saying “hey” or GE just isn’t making ’em like they used to. Every time a light blows, I just say “Hi dad!” ; )

    Your mind is sorting out what happened…and maybe, Grant is helping you do that.

    love and hopefully better food ahead,
    denise
    xxoo
    🙂

  23. avatar
    CeciliaGin | 1 June 2006 at 6:59 pm #

    Esteban:
    I’ll make you a dream pillow but in the meantime, if you can get your hands on any one of these herbs, put them under your pillow:

    Anise (strong scent so use lightly)
    Cedar
    Rosemary (strong scent so use lightly)

    With this essential oil a few drops on your pillow and bed clothes.
    Hyacinth

    They should help in banishing nightmares.

    Cecilia
    x

  24. avatar
    Anonymous | 1 June 2006 at 7:54 pm #

    Vegetarians in Northern Spain…..

    Ha Ha fucking Ha….

    Self-indulgence twunts!

  25. avatar
    Anonymous | 1 June 2006 at 9:58 pm #

    that moroccan chocolat will do that to you. but it does sound like grant was checking in with you, trust his message.

    can’t believe you couldn’t find any other tapas type veggie things to eat. weird! no patatas bravas, or mushrooms in garlic?

  26. avatar
    verdelay | 1 June 2006 at 10:06 pm #

    My dear grandmother came to me in the weeks following her death. She told me everything was alright and I belived her.

    Was it my neuronal net de-fragging? Was my unconscious mind processing sense data? Or did my dead grandmother visit me while I was in a dreamstate?

    I suppose I can believe what I like, can’t I? Or is that relativism?

    Perhaps a dogmatist out there can tell me what I should believe.

    Thanks for sharing, Mr. K.

  27. avatar
    OTTOMT | 1 June 2006 at 10:16 pm #

    VEGETARIAN RESTAURANTS IN MADRID:

    http://www.softguides.com/madrid_guide/eatingout/veggie.html

    There were also options for Bilbao…
    just a google away, hermano.

    CeeMoon
    xo

  28. avatar
    Anonymous | 1 June 2006 at 11:44 pm #

    sk how you can cover rage and beauty in one blog is ….

  29. avatar
    something from kate | 2 June 2006 at 12:26 am #

    A couple of weeks ago in Brisbane after the Grant McL tribute show at the Schonell driving down Jephson St thought I would show my friend where 19 Golding St was, had some friends who used to live in that street in the early 80’s and as we turned the corner into Golding the streetlight blew out

  30. avatar
    LeTango | 2 June 2006 at 12:26 am #

    Dreams, like this world, where we come together and still must part…

    Your dream is splendid. Thanks for sharing it. It reminds me of a similar stream in my own dreams of dear ones who have passed. Dreams, melancholy and a storm here. Hmm.

  31. avatar
    Anonymous | 2 June 2006 at 12:35 am #

    Just thank your lucky stars your not playing in old Ibiza town, as the thump thump thump would do ya tinitus neh good senor Kilbey

  32. avatar
    Anonymous | 2 June 2006 at 12:41 am #

    Has anyone seen MattDavison?? If so, please tell him to come and get his f-in drum kit outta my lounge!!!!! addixion or no addxion. Keef Richards or no Keef Richards, they’ll be on e-bay soon lad!!!! :)) and stay away from thos pokies. There’s f*ck all Steve can do for ya Bud 10,000 Miles Away. 🙂

    YouthWorshipper
    Auckland, NZ

  33. avatar
    Anonymous | 2 June 2006 at 12:42 am #

    love and peace to you
    you are god
    god is you
    you are one

  34. avatar
    captainmission | 2 June 2006 at 12:48 am #

    there’s a great dylan song called ‘series of dreams.’

    it’s always good to record / remember your dreams, there’s a saying a shaman told me, ‘a dream forgottern is like a letter unopened’ so i always write my dreams down now and over the years seen all the patterns and symbols that re occur, especially people, i seem to dream a lot about my grandfather who was actually a kabbalist, strange old wizard, i only met him twice and only recall the second time even though i was only 5, but now i have a relationship with him in dream states and feel quite close. Weird shit huh?

  35. avatar
    Anonymous | 2 June 2006 at 6:40 am #

    THE CHURCH

    SUMMER 2006

    UNINVITED LIKE THE ACOUSTIC

    “THE ELECTRIC TOUR”

    Free chocolate at the door, bring your own pipe and slippers.

  36. avatar
    Samosanx | 2 June 2006 at 8:57 am #

    S,

    I got sad weeping sad today too.

    What you write helps, all of it.

    Kitty

  37. avatar
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  38. avatar
    Anonymous | 2 June 2006 at 11:31 am #

    You’re a hard crack to nut, kilbey. i imagine you’d be an insufferable cutn at times, but possess the art of just managing to redeem your sorry self. But thanks for all you’ve done and said. It’s appreciated (I was gonna say more than you imagine, but that’s quite a healthy imagination ya got goin’ there). Anyway, you’re all right, kilbey, you’re all right.

  39. avatar
    Anonymous | 2 June 2006 at 2:13 pm #

    Stop missing days with the blog, Kilbey.

    For lord knows what reason we are all hanging on your every word.

    You committed to a years worth so stop skiving.

    Be good.

    Au revoir

    Bon Bon

  40. avatar
    davem | 2 June 2006 at 3:00 pm #

    Sad but true.
    I could be out there having a life….of sorts.
    The sun’s shining – a lovely day in middle England & here’s me sat in a dark corner of my kitchen wondering what old SK is up to.
    Love you more.

  41. avatar
    Larry | 2 June 2006 at 3:21 pm #

    I bet no one ever asks you what it was like working with Mae Moore … or do they?

  42. avatar
    Anonymous | 2 June 2006 at 4:32 pm #

    hey, what about us?
    – bon scott
    – gerry humphries
    – j o’k
    – dylan t
    – mary magdelaine
    – baudelaire
    – rimbaud
    – jean-paul
    – simone
    – david
    – solomon
    – cleopatra
    – nico
    – andy
    – john cale
    – lou baby
    – marrianne f
    – william blake
    – dante a
    – lawrence f

    can we be in your dreams too?

    grant wouldn’t mind
    he’d be at that party
    everyone would be in the kitchen
    tippin’ chairs and tellin’ lies
    we’d all write on the walls
    we’d all drink wine
    baudelaire would pull out a big spliff
    and hand it first to steve

  43. avatar
    Jen Jewel Brown | 2 June 2006 at 4:34 pm #

    jamon e queso -aaahauaghauaugh!!!

  44. avatar
    invisiwoman | 5 June 2006 at 1:04 pm #

    sounds like ya hadda visitation

  45. avatar
    Anonymous | 10 June 2006 at 8:00 am #

    I say briefly: Best! Useful information. Good job guys.
    »


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