posted on September 27, 2006 at 9:06 pm

all the tiny things speaking to me again
i cant get out of my head
i cant get it out of my head
the outside is oppressing
the inside is tired and rapidly emptying
david sylvian sings we used to do things my way
cold feet
cold heart
stifle a shiver
silver morning blues
a jet passes overhead
more separation
the leaves sway impossibly
someone or something must be shaking the tree
ugly birds in its nests
sharp claw n beak
streamlined feathered for the dive
when it plucks some other bird fresh from thin air
or plucks up some scurrying thing soundlessly
the sun is ashamed of itself today
it has let its solar system run down
it hangs quietly behind a cloud
like a soft over ripe peach
now sun
show yourself
reveal yourself
dispel the shadows which remain
names fill my mind
faces of school mates
and where they sat in my class
all of them olde now like me
fallen victim to years
their youth fled forever
theyre out there
wandering this world
someone else has a turn at school
someone else is born
someone else passes away
the circle must be completed they say
the wheel of karma inexorable, fiendss
you make your bed
you gonna lie in it
or tell the truth?
small things spook me
whats hunting me down?
time?
age?
failure?
big black nemesis
anathema personified
with plenty of kudos
tiny insects gather in clouds
christmas beetles at easter
a bucket full of starfish
a punnet of angelfruit
in season unseasonably early
the soft flesh melts in my mouth
its dark juice stains my lips
its seeds i spit with disdain
its aroma of heaven
its taste of miracle
my guardian angel appears
apart from that busted arm
you aint got nuthin’ to complain about
he/she says
i perform the ceremony of combustion
the pool is closed today
our day of rest says another swimmer once
the breast strokers sabbath
my ears sing the body electric
and something very wicked this way comes
harry houdini in negative
the man who gets you all into a trap
meanwhile
in a beachside suburb of sydney australia
the sun struggles feebly in the sky
the children cough n sneeze with colds
the baby sees me
oh wow she says
gum trees bow n scrape to the wind
white clouds fill the firmanent
a huge dead cockroach
reanimated by the dismantling ants
a lizard trusts me within arms reach
its trying to catch a tan in this mist/smog/cloud
small stupid dogs occaisionally bark hysterically
woof woof woofsy woof
the unfortunate don their costumes
and hit the trail to work
a huge fluorolit room
cubicled off
computers flashing figures
cups of coffeee
n ciggie break
boss an angry shape n voice looming
yeblik, wheres that report on the humphries account?
sorry boss
but i been looking at the sky?
yeblik, have you seen these figures?
sorry boss, i been writing poetry
yeblik, im having you fired
sorry boss, im going to leave anyway
im going to sydanee
im going to start a rocknroll groop
we’re gonna go on n on non
for yearsnyeahs
yeblik, youll never amount to anything out there
oh yessiree mr boss how right you were
my reverie fades
my shoulders aching from hefting the bass for hours
and from typing this letter to you
well thats more like it
the sun heaves itself free
sydanee puts on its sunny funny face
yeah
just like surf city
the models n alternahunks
the xpensif restaraunts
the wine n seafood n ha ha ha
put it on the account eh, darling?
coming out for lunch down the pier, gang?
no we’re off on percys yacht
we’re having a long weekend down at cyrils n prus
champers n oysterfeast
the pearls are real
and forming in the sea
rehearsals closing in on me
incessant racquet n argy bargy
im too olde for it all
i want to sit in my caravan
and drink a mug of grreen tea n paint
i dont want to be anywhere at a particular time
i dont like traffic
i dont like sittin’ in cars all day
i dont like the misery n citys ripped backsides
i dont like the tunnels full o’ fumes
but i like you
and i dont like to say goodbye
but i must
thats it
xxxx

58 Responses to “chem-mists, angelfruit n me”

  1. avatar
    Anonymous | 27 September 2006 at 10:35 pm #

    Top ‘o’ the morning to ya.

    I think the warm weather makes you ruminate a little deeper, SK…

    B.Good

    B.Bon

  2. avatar
    CeciliaGin | 27 September 2006 at 10:44 pm #

    Gloria Gaynor could never say goodbye either.

    I
    still
    don’t
    know
    who
    that
    was…

  3. avatar
    Fly | 27 September 2006 at 10:44 pm #

    Reminds me of that old movie from the 60’s, “First Men in the Moon.” The moon was populated by teenage mutant ninja ant like critters and when the sun passed into darkness they all stopped in their tracks.

    Toddism for the day –
    Everybody’s got to find his own place in the sun,
    everyone
    So shine on me now
    I’d rather live by a dream then live by a lie

    You can say what you will about me
    talk is cheap and I don’t mind

    When you lay your life down in them grooves
    you know you’re bound to get scratched up sometime

    It’s only just a song, pay me no mind

    I have to go now…

  4. avatar
    Hynm | 27 September 2006 at 11:13 pm #

    This is the truth.
    God is with us.

  5. avatar
    damien | 27 September 2006 at 11:33 pm #

    That you should reference David Sylvian in your blog only makes me think more of you, Mr Kilbey!

  6. avatar
    ambnt1 | 28 September 2006 at 12:09 am #

    Steven,
    Ah, sounds like the Nine Horses project by Sylvian, I love it. Beautiful songs, even though he is whining about his divorce through most of it. Well it’s probably a great soundtrack for your gloomy surroundings today. I burn soon your spacerock cd’s and send to KH HQ, so look for it in the next coupla weeks. Should keep you busy for awhile. Hang in there, man! PS: Dammit, I wanna be the first commenter, but I guess #6 isn’t too bad.

    –Chris

    n.p. Pete Namlook/Move D, “Space & Time”

  7. avatar
    Anonymous | 28 September 2006 at 12:41 am #

    Gidday Sir Stephan O’Killer DFC MBE & BASS

    If you ever get a chance – spend some time travelling through WA’s Pilbara region during the more clement climes and you will see why

    Love
    Celticat

  8. avatar
    Anonymous | 28 September 2006 at 12:48 am #

    Finally tonite Live at the Basement. Can’t wait and 2 wks tomorrow till the Enmore, bring it on.

    Love Therese

  9. avatar
    Anonymous | 28 September 2006 at 1:00 am #

    Swell array of syntax
    pods of citrus
    nurturous flesh vitamina
    hmmmm… lychee
    sweet avocado
    watermelon mango : soymilk shakes :
    cantelope mint
    banana nuts
    Proof of our wonderous loving mother..
    tis divine
    I am hungry now
    nice to hear of your lil advwentures with lil scarlet..
    blessings..
    peace

    jaime r…

  10. avatar
    Melquiades | 28 September 2006 at 1:14 am #

    I wish I could be there to witness you guys on your aussie tour. Make their knees knock. I know you can’t help it anyway.

    btw, a friend was over my house last week and really liked Earthed, Nineveh, and The Ephemeron (she just picked it out of my collection randomly). She asked to borrow it and i quickly replied,

    there are some books
    I just don’t lend
    not even to a friend
    She lied down on the floor
    and sobbed to no end

    So, I told her i would get her a copy. This made her stop sobbing. You never know what hocus pocus might be at the lendees fingertips.

  11. avatar
    Anonymous | 28 September 2006 at 1:24 am #

    Nice one today.
    You have a way of describing your demons more eloquently than many.

    Happy travels.

    Dutch Pierre

  12. avatar
    calling down baal and zeus | 28 September 2006 at 1:30 am #

    a grey bagatelle.

  13. avatar
    Renee | 28 September 2006 at 1:37 am #

    Steve,
    you managed to express and capture so vividly
    everything that I am thinking and feeling today
    today is my 33rd birthday
    and I have never felt so lost

    you make your bed
    you gonna lie in it
    or tell the truth?
    small things spook me
    whats hunting me down?
    time?
    age?
    failure?

    you have actually been an inspiration for me
    weren’t you about 33 when you guys finally hit the US scene with UTMW?
    maybe this will be the year for my big break through too
    so don’t be down on yourself
    you give me hope that I’ll be able to accomplish incredible things in the years to come
    just like you have

    thanks for the beautiful blogg today

    and I don’t know why, but I love the line
    ‘a bucket full of starfish’

    xxxx

  14. avatar
    veleska1970 | 28 September 2006 at 2:12 am #

    dreary, cloudy days kinda make me melancholy, too. and sometimes nostalgic….

    your boss was oh so wrong about you. so~~what did HE amount to? i suspect that not too long after you left to follow your muse, he went on to his next project~~pushing up daisies. his reward for shackling himself with such stress.

    we like you,too. we don’t want to say goodbye to you, either!!

    lotza love…..

  15. avatar
    fergal | 28 September 2006 at 2:46 am #

    the white hippy moses don’t feel like partin’ the red sea today;
    but we need u to lead the exodus & decipher the commandments for us sir … is there anyone else who can do these things & more?
    ~

  16. avatar
    Anonymous | 28 September 2006 at 2:50 am #

    sk, you’re a funny dude –
    extract from Adelaide Mag

    That being said, there is no doubting the band’s keenness to get their hands dirty in the interests of serving Australian audiences an offering of what I’ll paraphrase as ‘world-class space-rock’ and, in the process, hopefully, giving Kilbey something to write home about. Literally.

    “I wrote a blog every day while we were on tour in America. I was ranking 13 in the world. Now, unfortunately, I’ve dropped to 30. I don’t know if the Australian tour is going to have enough frisson to get me back up to 13 again, but who knows.”

  17. avatar
    Queen Hatshepsut | 28 September 2006 at 2:53 am #

    Happy Birthday Renee!!

    Steve –
    I felt scared and sad and I shivered when I read this. It’s like you had this surreal film running through your head. It was beautiful, but haunting.
    love,
    denise
    xxoo

  18. avatar
    mike a | 28 September 2006 at 3:22 am #

    Good one sk!!

  19. avatar
    leelinau | 28 September 2006 at 3:31 am #

    Whats up with all this synchronicity…it’s actually starting to worry me.

    Anyone else noticing it??

  20. avatar
    Anonymous | 28 September 2006 at 3:59 am #

    “wherever you go…there you are” –

    Blessings to you, Steve…
    see ya out there, somewhere

  21. avatar
    Anonymous | 28 September 2006 at 4:05 am #

    But stevo… if you just sat there in your caravan making artwork and sipping on green tea for therest of your other 50 or so years you have in this life, then who would make all of that beautiful, greatest music of all time? I was listening to ‘fading away’ and ‘laughing’ today at work. Some GREAT songs. They take me away to a better place… than where i was. Kind of funny how the one that never will work in a cubicle is making life easier for therest of us that are imprisioned in them. Little boxes of evil.
    Your very realistic about things, i really like that cause im like that too.
    Love all that you do. Your shoulder will be better when tomorrow comes.
    -Allen
    Galveston Tx

  22. avatar
    craig | 28 September 2006 at 4:53 am #

    it never ceases to amaze me how i get completely immersed in your writing…….it’s brilliant……and it flows with such ease……an immortal coil hardwired directly to source

    leelinau…..in my humble opinion…..i wouldn’t worry about the synchronicity at all……in fact, i would see it as all happening just as it is suppose to……little reminders that all is in perfect time…..and you are exactly where you’re suppossed to be at that time seeing it all come round in harmony……and, at least as i see it, the increasing synchonicity is just a part of the “grand cycle” ending…..there really is nothing at all in this world to be afraid of……startled, yes…….afraid, no……i’m not trying to come off as a “know-it-all”…….just trying to share and be helpful…….thats all 🙂

  23. avatar
    CAPTAIN BEYOND | 28 September 2006 at 5:48 am #

    tonight’s the night we’ll make history, honey you and i, me quote from styx…
    mjnjr

  24. avatar
    captainmission | 28 September 2006 at 7:17 am #

    hippie moses in the desert man, 40 days and 40 nights, lost in a metaphor, its just a mirage, it’ll pass and you’ll have some communion with your God, and you and your people will be free again. thats the way it is man…

    ever see that movie the ‘day the earth stood still’ that was a good movie

  25. avatar
    verdelay | 28 September 2006 at 8:48 am #

    Sitting in the lee of the equinox
    Our differences begin to emerge
    Though we seemed the same for a time
    You are growing warmer
    And I cooler
    Different directions around the same circle
    Passing one another along the arc
    See you in a season or two
    And we can swap sob stories
    About how things were
    And never will be again

  26. avatar
    Anonymous | 28 September 2006 at 9:37 am #

    Eskay,

    just knockin’ off and shooting off home to cook dinner for my girls and then live at the basement.

    Can’t wait.

    Celticat

  27. avatar
    Anonymous | 28 September 2006 at 12:23 pm #

    sk,
    you are the lace, baybee. beautiful words. the sun seems brighter now. thanks

    r.

  28. avatar
    Anonymous | 28 September 2006 at 12:39 pm #

    quality prose innit – pip

  29. avatar
    Anonymous | 28 September 2006 at 12:58 pm #

    How’s this:
    I saw the Church in 1982 and I’ve never had the chance since. They cancelled in ’86 and haven’t been back.
    But I’m still here…

  30. avatar
    John Garratt | 28 September 2006 at 1:37 pm #

    Ttarrag, what are you doing?

    I’m reading The Time Being. Leave me alone.

    What’s that, an astrological thing?

    Oh, boss, you wouldn’t understand. Go back to listening to Glenn Beck.

    John

  31. avatar
    matthew | 28 September 2006 at 2:45 pm #

    parthenogenesis

  32. avatar
    gavgams | 28 September 2006 at 3:41 pm #

    Live at the Basement (music show on national tv / Australia where they feature just one band doing a set) with the Church was great. Could see the boys and SK really puttin in. You can be rightly proud of ULTC.

    We here at the commune think Robbie W is a wanker. Toddler’s teeth are sharp.

    Now a positive thingy: I was thinking just today about a Sylvian lyric (syncronicity?) that sort of describes the Kilbey and Church project as I see it. Something like “I killed the Captain, I sunk the fleet, … to liberate the heart beat”. That’s what good music does, don’t it?… liberates the heartbeat? with motions, with poetrty, with sonic dramatisations of feeling. And there’s a lot of different feelings out there that need different songs, new songs for our times, but have to be sincere, authentic (even if the’re sarcstic ironic, whatever) to liberate the heartbeat.

  33. avatar
    pharaoh | 28 September 2006 at 4:31 pm #

    Dear Steve,

    apologies for an extended absence from your blogge, visiting family members and computer woes among the reasons. Havent missed an entry though, your last few in particular have really struck chords with me (a very Church-ish Em7 to Cadd9 progression)… this year finding myself turning 30 and currently unemployed with no direction, no plan, and no desire to join or succeed in the rodent-race we call modern life. If only I shared your talent for songwriting as well… *sigh*… guess i’ll have to hold out for PM Kilbey’s ‘Hippie Pension’ instead – i’m a shoe-in with the selection criteria.

    Just finished watching your Live at the Basement appearance, hoping someone with better technology than i was able to record it and post it online somewhere for all the overseas fiends – great stuff. Can i say your bass riffing at the end of “0408” reminded me a lot of Peter Hook’s playing – not sure what your opinion of the man is but i’m a huge fan.

    Can’t wait to see your Brisbane show now on the 7th… my appetite is most definitely whetted… so glad that you’re playing at the Tivoli again. It’s my favourite live venue in Brissy and your last show there for the Forget Yourself tour was sublime… the projection screen + Blade Runner samples a very cool touch (will never forget a moment at this show… my head swimming in jazz, grinning from ear to ear, eyes shut to the pure bliss of “Telepath”‘s opening few bars… opening my eyes to see Peter K grinning right back at me with a look that seemed to say ‘yeah… i’m digging this too’.)

    Well sorry to ramble, happy belated 52nd BDay SK (+ happy 33rd Renee) and hope you’re serious about the offer to mail you more space-rock, have been listening to a few things lately i think you might dig.

    peace n love,
    J.

  34. avatar
    syrinx | 28 September 2006 at 4:45 pm #

    “the sun is ashamed of itself today”

    That’s perfect.

    I am totally intrigued that your baby says “Oh wow!” on a regular basis. I just love that. It makes me smile in a GENUINE fashion.

    Have a good evening, Mr. K.

  35. avatar
    JJ | 28 September 2006 at 5:01 pm #

    Reading this in fluoro-light, 4th floor office. Nice, cool Autumn morning listening to Day Of The Dead driving in (combustion ceremony), sense of doom nags. My boss is not so bad, she’s decent. Love your descriptions of this mysterious place Bondi, places tend to define us, take on a character of their own. Listened to Ramble lassa night on iPod, sleep coming down, wondering where Albion Lane is…people walk by my door, look – he’s intently studying some lab report, no, intently studying The Time Being, looking for…..clues, to I don’t know what. Always looking..need to find some Angelfruit here if I can, nevah had any.

    Thanks for sharing the thoughts.

    JJ
    Atlanta

  36. avatar
    Anthony | 28 September 2006 at 5:10 pm #

    maybe the key to lifting yer blues today are the words from the mouth of baby bouncer, “oh wow”. she goes “oh wow” when she sees you just like we go “oh wow” when we read yer blog or hear one of yer new tunes for the first time. you may feel the years catching up to you, but without the time invested in said years, none of us, including your family would have the gifts you present today. sure, the blues is all part of it, so embrace it but remember baby bouncer’s little wonder.
    anthony

  37. avatar
    Anthony | 28 September 2006 at 5:17 pm #

    i also meant to say i don’t like goodbyes either. olivia has to go out of town for the weekend and my stepson will be at his dad’s. so it’s just me and the baby (although it’s fun going through my john lennon phase, minus the bread baking). we’re not going to tell her goodbye, just see you in a few days. separation via jet… hate it.
    anthony

  38. avatar
    Anonymous | 28 September 2006 at 6:56 pm #

    I been gone fer a while, missed mah goo-roo. little pearls o thought droppin’ out your pineal gland.
    making a glynnis smile and trudge on with mah nein to fyve.

    Good luck with your electric tour which i assume the allmighty dalla prevented ya from heaving acros the oceans to dubya dumbass land) Where i reside don’t ya know?

    My caravan is about 4 down. you ‘ll know the one the wafting jazz (smoke) and the whole eno’s working backwards boxset fillin the air.
    And maybe a little somna to take the edge off.

    Them swallows don’t wanna come back to capistrani until we elct a president that is smarter than the bugs they eat.

    theglynnisjohns

  39. avatar
    lorrain | 28 September 2006 at 11:42 pm #

    O Colombus

    womb = room
    priest = cura
    no more = nothing more
    afraid of his ruin
    the king had something changed within him
    fuming about the traffic,there in the unifield
    behind a shadow of doubt about it all,
    now
    Someone’s words to reassure U
    Almost with you, timelessly
    hipplea recalling heyday (n listening n smoking)
    as a chemtrail in seance

  40. avatar
    Anonymous | 29 September 2006 at 12:25 am #

    dude

    did you stay up and watch yourself on the box?
    I must admit, for a while ive been reading the blog but not listening.
    it was good to rekindle and a reminder of why I read in the first place. excellent sound and visuals…good set….

    looking forward to tonite at the gov…a couple of church days…I remember reading the american blog feeling a bit jealous, but tonite, full on electric again!! yeaah!

  41. avatar
    lorrain | 29 September 2006 at 1:21 am #

    The music advices and wishes are invaluable !

    Kuhlmann ^_^

  42. avatar
    lorrain | 29 September 2006 at 1:46 am #

    I wish my box could receive abc 🙁
    still a night of light, without satellite
    distant hugs to you, dear One

  43. avatar
    The carrier of fruit | 29 September 2006 at 2:31 am #

    to all you adelaidians, give us Perthites a review of the ‘electric’ shows. Can’t be there, but would love to hear unified field live and unaccoustic.

  44. avatar
    Anonymous | 29 September 2006 at 3:58 am #

    exquisite lyricist
    delicious voice
    and a man
    who eats and shits
    like all of us

  45. avatar
    Azza | 29 September 2006 at 4:05 am #

    Aggghhhh!! Missed the show last night and am very dissapointed. Was so looking forward to reliving it.
    I contacted the ABC to see if maybe I can get copy! See you and the guys in two weeks at the National Theatre( I’ll be one of the chearing throng). Until then. Enjoy..

  46. avatar
    Anonymous | 29 September 2006 at 4:41 am #

    “The wind will never cease to craze the frightening leaves.” are the last words of a Martin Amis character in his novel “Success” whose major theme is “the brutal shall inherit the earth”.
    Well may you sit morosely and observe the brutality of nature for in the end there is only the instinct to violence and the blood of the victim.
    All else is forlorn hope.

    George Taxi

  47. avatar
    secretBeatinMichigan | 29 September 2006 at 5:01 am #

    SK –

    It’s 12:40am in Deetroit but it’s 2:10(ish)pm away out yonder in AussieLand – just a few more hours ’til the return of Space Rock. (“Oh ye gods in he’ven above – were I a bird that I might fly…”)

    Ah, them lucky AussieCats – for a world with fresh live Space Rock is indeed a better place to be.

    Sock it to’em crazy-like, Nevets. Go for broke and knock’em out, killa! And please pass “Blessed Good Tidings and Good Luck” to the boys from the fans in Mitch-igan – if only AussieLand weren’t such a hairy swim away we just might try breaststrokin’ it (yikes!!!)!

    GO GO GO, SPACE ROCKERS !!!

  48. avatar
    Dave, from another time | 29 September 2006 at 6:19 am #

    Hi SK, I’ve been lurking on your blog for a while now — coming back now and then to read what you’re up to; once a week, once a month — since I discovered it, since I realised there were four Church albums released without my knowing, since you have such a brilliant way with words and a unique outlook on life. And now I can’t help stringing random thoughts together and breaking all the gramma rules. Because it can work fanta-stick. Keep it up.

    Best regards,

    Dave, a “fan” since Starfish (who loved Almost With You since it came out when he was 7 or 8, without ever knowing who sung it). Dave, a “fan” (who’s clearly not comfortable with the word “fan”) in his fluoro office cell in Bangkok, who left his alternative leanings behind years ago to seek fame and fortune in Southeast Asia, who’s awaiting the next good pay day so he can order the latest Church albums he didn’t know existed. (Where’s Dave’s fortune? He never cared about the fame!) Who should he order them through? Can they ship to Bangkok?

  49. avatar
    Anonymous | 29 September 2006 at 6:42 am #

    no worries regarding reviews. Ill be heading off to the gig in a few hours. cant wait…

  50. avatar
    Anonymous | 29 September 2006 at 8:34 am #

    Have fun tonight sk, cant wait to see you live and in person in a couple of weeks! yay!
    The tour posters made me do a double take today! I was checking out the cute topless chick on huge posters while stopped at traffic lights, wondering what the hell she is advertising, only to read that the squiggly words above her read “The Church – Magnetic Strip Tour”…whaaat!!! Pretty sexy for the church!! That’s one way to get people to sit up and take notice…that’s for sure!!!

    Love always,
    Amanda p

  51. avatar
    Anonymous | 29 September 2006 at 10:27 am #

    Oh for the wings of any bird
    Other than a battery hen…
    Hi Bob…

  52. avatar
    Anonymous | 29 September 2006 at 2:37 pm #

    Enjoyed watching the Church’s Basement gig on ABC last night so much so that after arriving home from seeing the depressing doco “An Inconvenient Truth” at the cinema tonight I cheered mysef through watching the Church live at the Basement on video again(yes I recorded the programme)…let me tell you there is nothing better than drinking a bottle of shiraz and watching the Church live in your living room in your pjs!

    Many thanks SK and pals for a wonderful Friday night in!
    B. 🙂

  53. avatar
    Chela | 29 September 2006 at 3:15 pm #

    So who’s posting this on You Tube then?

  54. avatar
    lorrain | 29 September 2006 at 3:32 pm #

    SIR REEL,
    reading over your bloggeez last night gave me these verses in the morning

    the mandarin was unaware of his lovely tears
    so he jus drank white jasmine tea, innoscently
    for he had furlonged the art of foot massage

    when i wake up, wish i could shuffle through previous romany films n drink n reed (oliver ?) the sublime in all symbols, n reverse

    recreated nerval with his kudos
    pendragon kowtows

  55. avatar
    mandn | 29 September 2006 at 3:39 pm #

    Orpheus, where are you? it’s past Friday now…

    hope all is well and well, that’s all.

    xo
    Mary

  56. avatar
    Anonymous | 29 September 2006 at 9:59 pm #

    Adonde estas, barabas?
    Cecilia

  57. avatar
    Anonymous | 29 September 2006 at 11:53 pm #

    the basement gig on DVD in my christmas stocking please

  58. avatar
    Anonymous | 30 September 2006 at 12:12 am #

    The story I wrote about T’Pol going to see The Church is off to the contest!
    Whew
    We’ll know in December.
    Thanks Eskey and Gang for inspirol


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