posted on July 26, 2011 at 12:03 am

an actor out on loan

my oh my the time overtaken me

i walk down this corridor but no one to awaken me

i walk down this hallway

the daylight hath forsaken me

my nineteen daughters look like their mothers

standing at a ceremony in a quiet suburban afternoon

i have taken leave of my sense of absence

when are you here but not here….?

now i see them more and more  though only fleetingly

i hear their voices in the murmur of my head

i temper folly with more folly

and still more to come

i am alive in the most twilit glade

i am living

in the twisted wirelike tendrils that probe your innermost gardens

and in the hastily assembled data that proves some nebulous thing

i sang about this on narcosis plus and lo not one paid heed

i sang about this on remindlessness and behold not an ear was prick

so i am here alone….. surely the quarantine is over

my fingers writhe to finish it

my limbs ache so do my wings

we are playing for laughs now my friends

yeah and the feeling that music could always manifest somehow

the sky is a lonely place

lonelier than minus seven

who could dwell there long….?

think of me instead as if you had seen me in your mirror

think of me as if you had never thought of me before

think of me when you see a mist rising after the rain

and if  you see your dearest love

beyond a wall of fire

i can change all of this but i wont

we abide by the physical rules until no longer applicable

when we escape velocity itself so fast we are at a standstill

when white suddenly is black

and on suddenly off

the hidden great underlying cause is revealed

in no uncertain nor certain terms

but even as i type it out seduced by futility

why anyone can see that english language aint what it used to be

i slip off quietly and no one has noticed

i found the door open

i simply stepped outside

 

 

 

 

 

17 Responses to “exterior shot inside”

  1. avatar
    Dom De Plume | 26 July 2011 at 1:22 am #

    “think of me as if you had never thought of me before” … glorious.

  2. avatar
    . | 26 July 2011 at 4:49 am #

    how did we imagine our lives to be anyway
    has it slipped through our fingers, what’s our next play
    will tomorrow bring feelings of satisfaction or will they sway
    towards regret and disappointment and every other feeling that betrayed
    us when we thought we had it figured out, or was it once upon a time in may
    where love found you or me and all life’s worries just melted away
    i’d like an opportunity to revisit that, is there a button for replay?
    does it really matter what imprint we leave upon this earth today
    i think so, in small or significant acts of compassion and charity
    where we share our talents to help another just get through the day
    wherein they can return the favor to another who can’t find their way
    keep up the magic in the realm of the time being, a necessary place
    between sleeping and waking where our journey makes perfect sense

  3. avatar
    Jonny Hollywood | 26 July 2011 at 7:02 am #

    I just listened to your rendition of ‘the neverness hoax’ with Ricky, pretty cool…

  4. avatar
    Boriah | 26 July 2011 at 7:47 am #

    Sipping “Narcosis +”, but how…when it´s midnight in America???

  5. Jmb066
    Jmb066 | 26 July 2011 at 9:07 am #

    Hello Steve,

    I have been very busy and have not posted here in awhile, your post today definately captured my mood as of late. I hope all is well with you and your family. Will David Neil be available here in the US soon or have I missed it.? I am really looking forward to the next Isidore release, been playing the eponymous a lot lately. The video posted with you and Martin for Knowing You Are In This World was music to my ears, I really hope you put that song on the next album it is very special. Anyway just wanted to say Hello, and let you know I am stil here. Hope to see you here in the States soon.

    Take Care,

    Jason

  6. avatar
    Lara | 26 July 2011 at 11:09 am #

    I wouldn’t worry too much about the English language. It’s doing just fine in your very capable hands.

  7. avatar
    Steven Krut | 26 July 2011 at 12:45 pm #

    “i temper folly with more folly” I can definitely relate to that. This one was especially nice, I thought.

  8. avatar
    thetimebeing | 26 July 2011 at 5:54 pm #

    if i was your student my dear youd be very very old…..

  9. avatar
    DavidP | 26 July 2011 at 11:33 pm #

    “in the service of your master
    you can take a faster door”…

  10. avatar
    Freddie | 27 July 2011 at 1:16 am #

    Don’t worry. Isn’t life a series of follies with something grand thrown in here and there? All in all, I’d say you’re doing quite alright!

  11. avatar
    hellbound heart | 29 July 2011 at 4:29 pm #

    I sense a measure of grief here
    love always……

  12. avatar
    Once | 30 July 2011 at 8:49 am #

    Love this. Reminds me of the dream I had last night, from which I awoke this morning and said, out loud although I was alone, “There’s no way in HELL that my brain could have come up with that, I LEARNED from it, it was something that I DIDN’T know, so where did that come from?” After which I proceeded to wonder about the nature of the conscious mind and what it would be like to be someone else; and to question my ability to discern whether anything is truly “real” or not.

    You were in it (and a cast of thousands) – it was all reincarnation and karma, and viewing past and future lives in mirrors within mirrors. My best dreams have a closing theme for some reason, and this one had “Famine” from Unearthed. Quite brilliant, but disconcerting because I know what I don’t know. And this dream had elements that quite simply could not have come from me.

    From where has this madness arisen? Detoxing from chemicals in cigarettes, no doubt – it’s been 15 days “cold turkey”, which would have been hellish if not for my penchant for the extreme. (And supportive friends, both in flesh and in electronica – you know who you are). And it’s a delightful madness, though I fear I must re-learn certain social graces; I’ve never had the confidence to insult, nor randomly compliment, anyone before – and didn’t realize the power, and the impact of such things. It must be used wisely, and with due discretion, oh yes.

    Anyway, I digress. These lines are eerily reminiscent of said dream –

    think of me instead as if you had seen me in your mirror
    think of me as if you had never thought of me before
    think of me when you see a mist rising after the rain
    and if you see your dearest love
    beyond a wall of fire
    i can change all of this but i wont
    we abide by the physical rules until no longer applicable
    when we escape velocity itself so fast we are at a standstill
    when white suddenly is black
    and on suddenly off
    the hidden great underlying cause is revealed

    Sadly and lovingly written, thank you for sharing this.

    I also now know that emotional pain is quite human and acceptable, if embraced and not run from.

    It has its own purpose.

    Best,
    Donna

    • avatar
      thetimebeing | 30 July 2011 at 8:51 am #

      congrats on giving up the cigs

      • avatar
        Once | 30 July 2011 at 11:27 am #

        Listening to “Nothing Inside”. Ironically, really do think it will remain as the best song you’ve ever written…Steve…it’s perfect. 🙂

    • avatar
      DavidP | 30 July 2011 at 3:28 pm #

      Donna, I reckon we sometimes get taught by our being or other beings in our dreams, they have a certain quality to them, like you seem to have now discovered. Your making changes to improve yourself by giving up the smokes (good work!) and the old saying of God helps those who help themselves perhaps has played itself out in your dreams.


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