posted on August 25, 2006 at 7:13 am

the trees are whispering to me
its sydney
its thousands of seconds
who are you?
every thing is a signal to me
what is happening to me?
into what are you transforming effortlessly?
alchemy?
have i cracked the code?
august strindberg burning his hands black
sulphur/the crucible/the retort
philosophers stoned indeed
am i crazy?
is this an onset of madness?
and why now?
the silver clouds superimposed on a peach sky
i tell you i love to be 51
subtle powers
have you any idea?
cosmic messages and wild geese chase
the patterns of the birds has a meaning
how could it not?
my kitchen darkens
my thoughts turn to god
all that love he has for us
expressed in so many ways
in the spectacular heavens
in the intricate designs of nature
for letting us live these lives
oh so many luxuries
we are living it up
purpleleaved trees buckle in the wind
you may forget something you really should remember
it seems i hear them
a child said my name in the marketplace
i found two shells in a unused drawer
music permeates my brain now
day and night
im swimming in it
i feel that fucking galaxy sliding away
like a slide sliding up the neck of a distorted reverberating guitar
i feel the moon pull my soul each night
i opened a little box and found a silver plectrum
i mentioned your name accidentally to someone
i dropped a coin in a well and i wished for……
i am navigating the networks
i am in the system now and getting stronger
i have interpenetrated certain planes
under your skin
but im out here
totally unreal
everything you have ever read here
has been fiction
any resemblance to anything else
is unlikely usually
i saw a tiny grey birdling in a tree doomed to die
i could not help it
can you feel this?
and can you feel this?
and can you feeeel this?
im everywhere baby
but so are you
there you are a point in space and time
are you beautiful?
dont make me laugh
last nite we drank riccadonna wine + extra nice things
romance
what remains of the sky is white
inside my own continuum
i experience human pleasure
the elements are defined
the opposites are reconciled
the mystery is temporarily delayed
gravity set aside
logic defied
conditions gratified
implicit in life
but always rushing into the future
and what must always await us there
im a voyager
im a traveller
im down here on the surface
im underneath all that snow
wham! a shock
a sudden departure
beware
read between the lines
i can tell you almost understand
i can feel the crooked pulse in my fingers
alpha and omega
hey up and hey down
i am what you say i am
i am so close
so close, so close
so close to breaking
into it
or out of it
can you tell if its true?
what do you know?
are you awake now?
im still here
interpreting the stars
reading the dish suds
the clock tick tick tick
never tock
a stormy night comes down
we welcome each other like brothers
i am disposed to rambling
i live and i breathe
i am here to observe
god says this is all for you
i say i will tell people
he says good
they dont seem to notice
the oceans of fish
the nights of stars
the gorgeous desert
the mysterious nordic winter
the veins in the leaf of the oak
i say how could they not see
darkness envelopes me
we lose our connection
end

52 Responses to “from an occult diary”

  1. avatar
    lily | 25 August 2006 at 8:06 am #

    Beautiful blogge today, SK. You have such a gift for capturing mood and atmosphere in your songs and poems/streams of consciousness. Hope all is well with you there.

    lily

  2. avatar
    Anonymous | 25 August 2006 at 8:18 am #

    goodbye, pluto
    hello, ice ball

  3. avatar
    The Other One | 25 August 2006 at 8:25 am #

    Awakening earth.
    We haven’t arrived.

  4. avatar
    kat | 25 August 2006 at 8:44 am #

    very cool;

    g’nite or g’morning or whatever it is,

    going to have budgie dreams

  5. avatar
    Anonymous | 25 August 2006 at 9:01 am #

    Trusting demon

  6. avatar
    Queen Hatshepsut | 25 August 2006 at 9:08 am #

    my god that’s beautiful. I am going to read it again. And again. And then finally, go to bed, with your words in my head.
    🙂

  7. avatar
    Anonymous | 25 August 2006 at 9:08 am #

    Gods intrument

  8. avatar
    CAPTAIN BEYOND | 25 August 2006 at 9:23 am #

    thanks for picking me up when me bout to fall…
    mjnjr

  9. avatar
    Anonymous | 25 August 2006 at 9:42 am #

    Goosebumps, not once but TWICE in one day!!! First the Church gig dates, now this, you’re driving me insane you are!

    Love
    Amanda

  10. avatar
    donjoe | 25 August 2006 at 10:11 am #

    Welcome home Steve…and thx.

    ML

    don joe

  11. avatar
    fergal | 25 August 2006 at 10:33 am #

    nice sk
    i know u have been communicating with palm trees for some decades, at least
    and u don’t look so pale these days …
    ~

  12. avatar
    Dig | 25 August 2006 at 10:43 am #

    I love writing like that!!!

  13. avatar
    dig | 25 August 2006 at 10:47 am #

    Or should I say reading writing like that!
    I didn’t mean to imply I can right like that.

  14. avatar
    edge | 25 August 2006 at 11:10 am #

    I only heard about this blog recently. Finally caught up with all the blog entries from the start – reads like a great book. Did you really flick leeches on to another passenger on a train?

    Been living around Asia for nearly ten years now but I still miss those church gigs in Brissy. I disagree a little with Steve’s sentiments about releasing church material live – the wall of sound of classics like reptile and you took (to name just a couple), live and electric, are sensational and deserve to be made available in surround sound quality on CD.

    I agree with comments about P=A being a masterpiece. I remember the NME review printed after it was released in ’92 – couldn’t believe their comments, utter tripe. Lustre is worth the price of the record alone. Still, it was an era when they were besotted with forgettable nonsense like the wedding present, the charlatans and other tuneless nobodies.

    Anyway, none of this is particularly on point, just a few random thoughts picking up on snippets of some of the entries to date.

    TK

  15. avatar
    one rigid finger typist | 25 August 2006 at 11:26 am #

    good work tk from above…how long did it take u to get thru the blogs???
    its been a very insightful journey. when uve been listening to a band for 25 years u dont expect to suddenly be taken along for the ride every single day…pretty amazing stuff…

    so sk, thanks a bunch and see ya at the gov in september…u gotta luv the gov though…great venue!
    none of the jackson-vile stuff hey…

  16. avatar
    veleska1970 | 25 August 2006 at 11:40 am #

    how is it possible to paint with words like you do, steve? this is artwork, indeed!! it’s lush, colorful, has texture…..God’s beauty is so resonant through your words. thank you for sharing your gifts with us.

    lotza love…….

  17. avatar
    tokinjester | 25 August 2006 at 12:02 pm #

    and……roar of applause—-STANDING O–Fade ta white—-

  18. avatar
    restaurant mark | 25 August 2006 at 12:19 pm #

    steve…keep listening, keep observing…keep breathing, nice and slow. take care.
    mark

  19. avatar
    Anonymous | 25 August 2006 at 12:44 pm #

    sk,
    that’s it then. this blog is directed from God. there is a need for it.
    heaven-sent. now, sk, you can’t quit. or shouldn’t that is

    yes, lustre. amazing song that no-one talks about ever.

    richard

  20. avatar
    Anonymous | 25 August 2006 at 1:20 pm #

    “.”

    from the heart of mysticism
    comes the art
    magic
    beauty
    transcendence

    meld….

    “the lines between art and life do not exist
    there is only one art to master
    ….the art of living”

  21. avatar
    (('{~_~}')) | 25 August 2006 at 1:30 pm #

    I can feel it

  22. avatar
    (('{~_~}')) | 25 August 2006 at 1:31 pm #

    …we are all connected.
    If only humans didn’t feel so disconnected from each other.
    What a different world this would be.

  23. avatar
    John Garratt | 25 August 2006 at 1:36 pm #

    Richard,

    I like Lustre too. Especially the part about the sucubus.

    Shit, how do you spell it?

    John

  24. avatar
    Larry | 25 August 2006 at 1:42 pm #

    Agree with the other comments about Lustre – does it get played much live?

    When I put P=A on the iPod recently I cued it up as I stepped out for a nighttime walk – really powerful stuff: those drums, those bass thumps … and those amazing bendy guitar swells – when I first got P=A I just about drove my housemates at the time crazy, trying to replicate that sound with a little practice amp and an Ibanez hollowbody (no whammy bar).

    Dug out my acoustic for the first time in months but can’t find the tuner. Could be some sort of sign.

    Saw the video for Already Yesterday, er, yesterday – I didn’t know there was one. Steve, what are your thoughts on that one? Was that National Geographic footage?

  25. avatar
    nickfiction | 25 August 2006 at 1:46 pm #

    just ….. beautiful….

  26. avatar
    Anonymous | 25 August 2006 at 1:49 pm #

    beautiful blog steve. thank you.

  27. avatar
    (('{~_~}')) | 25 August 2006 at 1:52 pm #

    I have to admit, I have a problem with the God creation thing. I can’t understand why he would create humans 250 million years after dinosaurs. That’s a long time twiddling your thumbs!

  28. avatar
    Anonymous | 25 August 2006 at 1:53 pm #

    dearest esskay who has given my life meaning for several a decade, these are my first words to you, which, incidentally, are not mine.

    After he had journeyed,
    And his feet were sore,
    And he was tired,
    He came upon an orange grove
    And he rested
    And he lay in the cool,
    And while he rested, he took to himself an orange and tasted it,
    And it was good.
    And he felt the earth to his spine,
    And he asked, and he saw the tree above him, and the stars,
    And the veins in the leaf,
    And the light, and the balance.
    And he saw magnificent perfection,
    Whereon he thought of himself in balance,
    And he knew he was.

    Just open your eyes,
    And realize, the way it’s always been.
    Just open your mind
    And you will find
    The way it’s always been.
    Just open your heart
    And that’s a start.

    And he thought of those he angered,
    For he was not a violent man,
    And he thought of those he hurt
    For he was not a cruel man
    And he thought of those he frightened
    For he was not an evil man,
    And he understood.
    He understood himself.
    Upon this he saw that when he was of anger or knew hurt or felt fear,
    It was because he was not understanding,
    And he learned, compassion.
    And with his eye of compassion.
    He saw his enemies like unto himself,
    And he learned love.
    Then, he was answered.

    Just open your eyes,
    And realize, the way it’s always been.
    Just open your mind
    And you will find
    The way it’s always been.
    Just open your heart
    And that’s a start.

    (moody blues, the balance)

    oh how i wish i could have been on your tour. to tell you what and where and why and how this mess all got started, and to pick your mind for clues on where and why and when this mess will all get cleared up. i know one day it will. november 22 is a special day, look it up, plot the perimiter, chart the cosmos – it will tell you something you (perhaps) didn’t already know. this year could be it for us. but there’s so much work that needs to be done. i don’t know where we intersect, or where i end and you begin, and if at all, but i’ll stay true to my nature and look to the dawn for a sign. one day.

    -jayayy (a mouse, anon, for now)

  29. avatar
    dean9000 | 25 August 2006 at 2:40 pm #

    I couldn’t agree more

    excellent entry my friend

  30. avatar
    smoochgirl | 25 August 2006 at 2:42 pm #

    life is indeed a mystery, as is the beauty in nature. those spectacular moments worth remembering make it wonderful to be alive. i would like to think that everything has a meaning, a greater purpose; that we are all here for a reason and somewhow cosmically connected. it’s discouraging to think otherwise. i cannot look at the Earth and her beauty and deny God’s existence. it just seems impossible to me. i guess we won’t know for sure until move on.

    by the way, your fiction is dynamic & inspiring.

  31. avatar
    (('{~_~}')) | 25 August 2006 at 2:47 pm #

    John Garratt

    I think there’s something weird going on
    Something unforeseen
    The best impression of a succubus
    That I have ever seen

  32. avatar
    CeciliaGin | 25 August 2006 at 2:56 pm #

    Friday Spanish:

    can you tell if its true?
    what do you know?
    are you awake now?
    im still here
    interpreting the stars
    reading the dish suds
    the clock tick tick tick
    never tock
    a stormy night comes down
    we welcome each other like brothers

    sabes si es verdad?
    que sabes?
    estas despierto?
    sigo aqui
    interpretando a las estrellas
    leyendo la espuma de los trastes
    el reloj tic tic tic
    nunca toc
    una noche tormentosa llega
    nos saludamos como hermanos

    Now go out and draw something…
    Cecilia
    xx

  33. avatar
    persephone2u | 25 August 2006 at 3:35 pm #

    little silver plectrums in Eno’s Oblique Strategy boxes…

  34. avatar
    Letango | 25 August 2006 at 3:52 pm #

    This morning I dreamed of black people walking around leaking milk out of every pore.

    I dreamed my daughter was home, back in bed with me, nursing.

    I dreamed her father was on the toilet doing what he does first thing nearly every morning.

    What if we saw each other as they felt?

    You would see me now a big blurry smudge in 28 bit color.

    Daughter’s been gone for two weeks with her father up north visiting family and I can’t focus! Pace is slower, my mind is slower, I sleep in, I feel drugged. Where’s my life as I knew it? As I lived it? Shook up now.

    Ever see Woody Allen’s Deconstructing Harry? The scene where he’s having the anxiety attack? He stares at his blurry hand, screaming: “I’m Out of Focus… look… I’m out of Focus”

    In and Out, SK, like the breath.
    First here, then there.
    I follow your thread–
    Oh your blog takes me –and it too
    pulls me in and then out of
    FOCUS.

    G’day everyone.

  35. avatar
    Anonymous | 25 August 2006 at 3:59 pm #

    I had a dream with Eddie Veddar and he was singing Black

    Not
    the
    Mod

  36. avatar
    stealthblue | 25 August 2006 at 4:03 pm #

    That was smooth and brilliant. Love the mind set, beautiful energy today.
    Thank you. Peace to everyone…Have a righteous weekend.
    BV

  37. avatar
    drzej | 25 August 2006 at 4:45 pm #

    I travel around, travel around like you do Nevets, and I know that feeling of a blink of an eye and another city, another bed, another balcony, then finally home and that feeling of wondering if it ever really happened at all.

    I prefer to think yes, but it is part dream and part “re-al-i-ty, maaaaaan.” There is always another ocean full of worthy creatures to fly over.

    Stay lovely.

    drzej

  38. avatar
    ben | 25 August 2006 at 7:13 pm #

    love it

  39. avatar
    JJ | 25 August 2006 at 7:41 pm #

    Space Journalist –

    Your own Master Olof delivered in pixils, via excited electrons. Thanks for this little mind-journey today. Funny, the comments on Priest = Aura, I was listening to it last night on headphones, going drifty-sleepy. A Masterwork. “The Disillusionist”….my tour guide throughout much of my time here. He comes to my town every Autumn.

    A humble thank-you, SK.

    JJ

  40. avatar
    The Other One | 25 August 2006 at 8:13 pm #

    Quando ipsa fertur in magnum amoris excessum aut odii aut alicuius talium.
    Fertur in grandem excessum alicuius passionis invenitur experimento manifesto quod ipse ligat res et alterat ad idem quod desiderat et diu non credidi illud.
    Cum tali affectione exterminata concurrat hora conveniens aut ordo coelestis aut alia virtus, quae quodvis faciet, illud reputavimus tunc animam facere.

    Because sometimes Magick can only be explained by…
    Love is the law.
    Love under will.

  41. avatar
    Renee | 25 August 2006 at 9:14 pm #

    All fiction, how unfortunate

    perhaps I overestimated you then

    and you underestimate us

  42. avatar
    Jesuskrishna | 25 August 2006 at 9:27 pm #

    Lustre is quite possibly my all time favourite Church song, and when you think about how many Church songs I love deeply, that’s saying quite a bit.
    I’ve never heard it live, have any of you?
    I wish!
    M
    %^)

  43. avatar
    syrinx | 25 August 2006 at 9:40 pm #

    I am running out of ways to say “beautiful.” Getting out the thesaurus is too lame. Trying to come up with a new poetic image of my own too affected.

    So okay then…beautiful.

  44. avatar
    Renee | 25 August 2006 at 10:10 pm #

    A thesaurus isn’t lame,
    what’s lame is the fact that I have to use a damn dictionary sometimes when reading these blogs!!!!

    (boy, I’m gonna hear it now, that’s ok, knock yerselves out!!)

  45. avatar
    syrinx | 25 August 2006 at 11:08 pm #

    Oh join the club, renee. I have been lately feeling how dull my early education was. To have been educated in the rural south during the really formative years, I have been playing one long game of catch-up ever since. And it’s making me feel old.

    Looking up words is a joy, though. Isn’t it? I think we’re all here for the love of language, anyway. Thanks.

  46. avatar
    Lil' Me BiG World | 26 August 2006 at 12:04 am #

    thank you again…

    …beauty is as beauty does…

    …serenity is …

    …now i am once again,

    blissfully

    unaware of anything else…

    thank you again!

  47. avatar
    Mikea | 26 August 2006 at 1:38 am #

    Good one sk!!

  48. avatar
    Anonymous | 26 August 2006 at 1:50 am #

    last nite we drank riccadonna wine + extra nice things
    romance

    Sk, sounds like you got laid last night.

  49. avatar
    lizardlizard81 | 26 August 2006 at 2:24 am #

    Writing so tactile..sensual.

    I think I’m getting turned on…

    *blush*

  50. avatar
    Anonymous | 26 August 2006 at 3:25 am #

    Coal crudity

  51. avatar
    Anonymous | 26 August 2006 at 3:27 am #

    you’re under my skin
    and all around it
    i have always felt the soul of trees and their wondrous design
    and the love of brother sun
    but i do not have words
    for what is going on

  52. avatar
    DJK082067 | 26 August 2006 at 3:49 am #

    SK,

    Glad you are home,safe and sound. That was an amazing tour (especially the Chigao show were we got to meet you a little foggy, and rainy…and a lot later just outside the doors(Thanx again Rob D. my new found hero) Thanks for spending the time. You are humble and gracious gentleman and a true human, breathing this sometimes distorted air around us. Good Luck w/ the coming future and the $$$ of “Uninvited,like the clouds”.

    Forever a Fan,
    DJK082067

    “Whats up stealthblue?”


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