i hate fucking cigarettes

i detest and loathe and fucking abhor the fucking things

these fucking cigarettes are some fucked up fucking shit, right…?

what the fucking fuck???????

filthy stinking stupid idiot things that do nothing

at least fucking alcohol does something even if its horrible

oh yeah sorry cigarettes do do something

they fucking kill ya

heres the deal imagine this

13 bucks for twenty little putrid sticks

that stink out inside and outside in

dirty mucky ashy smelly foul foolish fucking useless things

for a hundred bucks a week habit you can develop a disgusting disease

you wont get any visions or dreams or loss of inhibitions

you wont get any drowsiness or euphoria or blurred eyesight

you wont hallucinate or overdose or trip or get loaded or pissed

or high or down or out there or stimulated or anything

what do you get?

fucking nothing

i keep using the word fucking

so as to emphasise to an nth degree the total imbecility of cigarettes

no one can defend them there is not one good thing you can say

“oh it gives me something to do with my hands”
yeah…so you gonna trade your fucking lungs for that..?

i mean before smoking who ever fucking said that…

gives me something to do with my hands…

do you think cavemen sat around

wishing that their hands had  something to do…?

do you think aristotle fucking wondered what he could do with his hands

as if his hands were restless and demanding “something to do”

what a fucking joke a killing joke it is

what about “it calms my nerves”

try fucking having throat cancer n see how calm your nerves are

a total criminal absurdity

a wicked cosmic joke so incredibly blatant we almost ignore it

for the last forty years since we kinda “found out” about smoking

we have ignored the vicious pernicious fuckwit grip of this killer

its just totally stupid

and it goes against the grain of intelligent western thought

one day it will have to go just like fucking bullfighting

in fact they are both totally idiotic things

no there is no beauty or inexplicable enigma to em

both of em are death

a negation of life

fuck you kilbey you take drugs you say

fuck you kilbey you are an ex cigarette smoker yourself hypocrite

or as one alcoholic cretin recently re-marked to me

when informed that i did not take kindly to booze in MY house

he said : you sound like the reformed whore in church, steve

and there you go some little axiom to justify yer unhealthy habits

so when kilbey says fuck dont smoke cigarettes

you say fuck you kilbey you took fuckin’ heroin, BABY!!!

yes i did but that doesnt help your tongue cancer

yes kilbey is a hypocrite

but surely its better to be the fucking reformed whore in church

(ha ha)

than the unreformed whore getting fucked by some horrible brute up the back lane

or what?

are you following my fucking logic this is not rocket surgery!

it kills you

it does nothing but feed itself

no that is not just a metaphor

maybe i know nothing about anything

but i fucking understand addiction

my friends whom i implore DO NOT SMOKE

i was addicted to smack for ten years

it gave me a lot of time to consider the mechanisms of addiction

yes i consider myself an expert like a thief is expert in thieving

i am not proud of my knowledge or how i obtained it

but is knowledge nonetheless

i tell my friends look there is some kinda spirit at work in this

an opium spirit

a tobacco spirit

a wine spirit

a vodka spirit

a marijuana spirit

yes metaphorically

yes on certain levels

levels you may not understand unless

you get someone like me

someone who examines thought as a living

i write words and the words come to me

and i have observed how these words arrive

i see where the words come from

and until i tangled with heroin i didnt understand

humanity is in some apparent symbiosis with many things

with animals with plants with environments

the fruit contains the seed so some creature  eats it

walks around

and excretes it somewhere else

the fruit tree cannot get its seed over there by itself

the tree makes the apple so human will eat it and help it propagate

the human benefits from the apple and grows loadsa trees

this is as our symbiotic relationship with tobacco

fuck are you telling me humanity

is not in some sorta symbiotic relationship with tobacco….?

tell me this :

if tobacco had no use to man would it still be around after millions of years?

it had to figure out something didnt it?

i mean every fucking thing that gets through each century

has to have something going for it, right?

otherwise you fade away

you gotta have strength or speed or endurance or adaptability

in the plant world i guess things must die out too

they have the problem of no mobility and they need to get about

usefulness to another species is a big fucking plus i’d say

ok so theres this substance and its usefulness is to man

only this fucking symbiotic relationship is now a hoax

i reckon the native americans for example used tobacco “correctly” :

yeah on special occasions  they would smoke a large quantity at once

eg dig this

a junky in stockholm once told me that hed tried every fucking drug

i said what was the weirdest scariest fucking trip man

he said tobacco

i said what do you mean…tobacco…?

but this swedish junky had once visited new guinea

and smoked tobacco with the natives

big deal i said

no man he said

this fresh tobacco in this great big pipe

its like smoking a hundred cigarettes at once

he said it fucking knocked ya right out of this world

you know i could kinda imagine it

like when you start smoking and you get your first nicotine rush

its fucking horrendous

like dizzying  nauseous breathless kick in the guts

imagine that feeling times 100

thats the correct dose i guess

one huge fucking blast occasionally

the native cultures dont puff on fucking cigs all day n night

they use it with a certain ceremonial feel that almost prevents abuse

the men would gather and i guess have their ceremony

i dont fucking know say some stuff

to give this smoking some context or holiness or tradition

i dont know do i……

ok you smoke this great big pipe

with the circumference of a small cannon

and one can only imagine

BANG! youve gone from 0 to 1000 in one tenth of a second

the swedish junky convinced me of his weird tobacco epiphany

yes i do believe there is something out there to be observed

and normally i am the first idiot wanting to see what it is

every fucking substance got its own dimension

heroin dimension is warm and sleepy ….at first….

the cocaine dimension is exhilaration

whatever i guess angel dust has its own dimension

datura has  got a dimension and its hideous

tobacco definitely has a dimension but i dont wanna go there

it may even be a useful dimension

i dont know

i have never really read an interview with a sioux

talking about his tobacco experience

one assumes it had some big pluses

but um white man is not using tobacco in this way

i smoked a million cigs and not one tiny revelation

like ingesting a tiny bit of some drug

never getting the real effect but just constantly under the surface

the trouble is not so much with the substance tobacco and its effects

the trouble is the means by which we fucking get it into our systems

the way it comes in

not what it does

the native users smoke it occasionally not constantly

not with all the additives and all the fucking other shit

i bet the native users dont suffer all the chronic smoking bullshit we got

we’re smoking this stuff

we’re getting no revelations

we’ve fucked it and modified it

like how we made cocaine from coca leaf

they say the cats in south america who chew the coca leaf are cool

at least cooler than the raving egotistical cocaine addict in the west

not all people react to cocaine like that

drugs are like alcohol

people react   in a whole gamut of ways

going from total negative disinterest to crazed apostle-like mania

but by fucking with the coca-leaf the west did its usual dumb thing

some of the active ingredients were extracted from a melange of molecules

the west considered some parts of the coca leaf unnecessary

maybe they thought it inert or something

other bits are souped up with a chemical process

the mode of transmission is changed perverted

now its superfast  superstrong but supernasty too

it wasnt sposed to be

youve fucked with something far deeper than you can understand

something had already figured out how it was supposed to work

god or the plant itself or something else …nature if you like

it doesnt want to kill its host

tobacco doesnt want to kill its host

no drug does…enslave them yes but not to harm them too much

the 2 sides of a symbiotic relationship need the other to stay in good shape

the sucker fish on sharks

the shark says get rid of my irritating parasites and you can hang onto me

the sucker says cool i’ll get to work right away

he knows the shark aint gonna hurt him cos they gotta good deal

but either god or evolution or some other force… nature for example…

has somehow sorted it out and theres a real mesh of interconnectedness

and that is how it works for mutual benefit

the size and shape of both the fish for example

if a human redesigned one of the fish  if it were possible

you can be sure it would go wrong maybe in some hideous unseen way

thats what happened with tobacco and the west

we are not using it we are abusing it

it wasnt supposed to be like this

we are creatures for all our intelligence

we are subject to the material rules of our reality

tobacco smoke

esp in cigarettes and the 20 a day smoking of them fucks you bad

hang on

smoking tobacco constantly kills people yet we tolerate it?

somehow our symbiosis is outta whack

cos our partner is dealing us death

if it was anything else killing us so unnecessarily as this

people would be going fucking beserk that it was banned and hard to obtain

but we have accepted it

its hard to stop now it is so thoroughly rooted in our lives

but my fascination is actually with the tobacco spirit in dialogue with us

now a kinda perverted fucked up spirit urging you to smoke

even tho its taking out people left right n centre

young women especially dying faster sooner nastier

big multiplier /good odds on an early death

fuck that spirit of tobacco is selling you some trip aint it?

more tomorrow