posted on April 1, 2007 at 8:51 pm

exit
medieval pause
wait!
its coming to me
you wont believe it
open your mind
im coming aboard
im swarming through your neurons now
you can hear my voice with every fibre of your time being
behind your eyes
in the corner of your mind
on your fingertips
time streams away from you
we are hurtling into futures
we are hurting for time
we are free falling into the abyss
screaming down the black corridor
headlong in april
and still
we pick up speed
slippery tendrils we grasp at
but to no avail
even me
with all this
going down n in
when you get used to it
if you get used to it
and you try for brief moments
to remain still inside the flux
frozen within lava
you’ll notice somethings
at first you’ll be confused, of course
life on life on life
it may seem that
youve got all the time
in the world
you may suddenly feel as if youre moving in slo-mo
you may encounter spirit chatter and buzzing sounds
you may shudder or burn up
you may hit inanimate objects d’art
everything will be revealed
but you wont understand it
cos we cant understand it yet
its too much
itll turn you inside out
its so simple
its so huge
its so easy
easy to smash into
and everything crumples
now
a second truly becomes an hour
youve collided with the vanishing point
youve blown through the distant horizon
impression of shattered silver shooting through the air
and the thorns will tear you
and the fragments will penetrate your shell
and rip off the skin
in the empty place
in the space between the houses
in the black streaked mornings on perspex screens
when you realise youve never been more alone
when you realise that it must be over
when no one can hear your thoughts
where the ending should be or else
and im looking for you somewhere
but its too late
im too far away
barking up the wrong tree
how was i to know?
and in the world without you….
the people there
forever a stranger
who can read these signs?
who understands this system?
you retreat
they advance
a smothered alien ive become
searching for a needle in my haystack
shooting up the rapids
and all of that
yes i expect so
talking with the giants of music
walking down flowered paths
oh what good will it do me?
being alone is not freedom
gardens and conversations appear n fade
parties yachts coloured lights on black water
scenes fly past in a haze
lost in a one way street
arguing with my father
collapsing at the start
being chased thru a park by bullies
howling for my blood
outside christine camerons on my bike
why she had blue teeth because she drank ink….
noels mother never liked me
that naive baby…..
its like a village isnt it?
the pervading odours of the winery
wolves at the door
theyre asking after you
gloves on the floor
theyre reaching after you
they want you
i walked through my first fog
without you
i fell off and cut my leg
a bird attacked me out of the blue
at first the sonorous beating of its wings puzzled me
then it hit my head with its beak n claws
screaming as it dived
and then it soared off above me
becoming a black point in the blazing southern sky
and summers probed me with scorching days
lawns withered and reflourished
rain fell in buckets
we went to the rivers and fished
the whirlpool ever alert
sucked at my feet with fingers of weeds
somebody must have saved me
im typing away here aint i?
im still here in the land of the living
today at least
maybe some important details ive left out
maybe the contents have shifted during your voyage
maybe all the appointments have been cancelled
and all the arrangements postponed
what if this road leads you astray
or this night finds you lost
and where will it end?
no one else could have written it

37 Responses to “glowing filaments”

  1. avatar
    isolde | 1 April 2007 at 10:25 pm #

    wow great way to start the day thanks sk

  2. avatar
    kat | 1 April 2007 at 10:54 pm #

    ya, i will most likely remain lost. sk, i think this is my very fave you have written, for what its worth.

    xo the fool ;]=~~~

  3. avatar
    Anonymous | 1 April 2007 at 11:06 pm #

    That was beautiful sk, I feel so sad now.
    Love always,
    Amanda

  4. avatar
    skyintheairwaves | 1 April 2007 at 11:17 pm #

    being lost means the journey to found-ness is still being undertaken.

    And its all about the journey, bucko!

  5. avatar
    Anonymous | 1 April 2007 at 11:31 pm #

    i feel reflourished..fingers burnt on the engine, thorns jabbing into paws…nails dirty…d in tx !-!

  6. avatar
    nickfiction | 1 April 2007 at 11:42 pm #

    great read!!!!

  7. avatar
    fantasticandy | 2 April 2007 at 12:26 am #

    steve,
    would you answer a question for me?
    is the blog thing honing your skills?
    because…..just lately you seem to have broadened your horizons.
    the envelope no longer seems to even exist for you.
    i’m now quite sure that the whole blog experience has made you search both deeper inside and outside yourself than ever before.
    i’m very glad that i ‘know’ you.
    i feel a bond that has little to do with paypal.
    i look forward to meeting you again soon my brother.
    i actually feel like this with ‘the dudes’.
    maybe wer’e doing something right?
    love to ALL of you reading this,
    there’s something going on here,
    something….special.
    andy L.

    p.s. eek..your’e something else,
    you really,really made my day!!!

  8. avatar
    triantelope | 2 April 2007 at 12:37 am #

    “no one else could have written it”

    no kidding!

    love these random jaunts through time…

  9. avatar
    PAGEY | 2 April 2007 at 12:42 am #

    External forces

    In a study published in the January-February 2006 issue of the Geological Society of America Bulletin, a team of Italian and U.S. scientists argued that the westward component of plates is from Earth’s rotation and consequent tidal friction of the moon. As the Earth spins eastward beneath the moon, they say, the moon’s gravity ever so slightly pulls the Earth’s surface layer back westward. It has also been suggested (albeit, controversially) that this observation may also explain why Venus and Mars have no plate tectonics since Venus has no moon, and Mars’ moons are too small to have significant tidal effects on Mars. [1] This is not, however, a new argument.

    It was originally raised by the “father” of the plate tectonics hypothesis, Alfred Wegener. It was challenged by the physicist Harold Jeffreys who calculated that the magnitude of tidal friction required would have quickly brought the Earth’s rotation to a halt long ago. Many plates are moving north and eastward, and the dominantly westward motion of the Pacific ocean basins is simply from the eastward bias of the Pacific spreading center (which is not a predicted manifestation of such lunar forces). It is argued, however, that relative to the lower mantle, there is a slight westward component in the motions of all the plates.

  10. avatar
    Anonymous | 2 April 2007 at 1:01 am #

    havent “played” with my lover for far too long…he blows my mind…from all vectors…i am sure that you and yours will miss each other terribly as well…i find that eating raw chillis satisfies the buzz n the heat nthe spiciness that i crave when hes not around……please forward my tip to lovely wife……..or she could read a blog like the one you wrote this morning…….thank you…….too much chilli hurts my arse..ha ha cant beleive i said that…i will get to see my precious one soon enough…..xxxxxgenx

  11. avatar
    Anonymous | 2 April 2007 at 1:26 am #

    oh my so lovely sk. thank you thank you for the slice of life. even if it wasn’t.

    r.

  12. avatar
    ~ | 2 April 2007 at 2:15 am #

    how could either
    of us know
    what we were searching for
    or what we would find?
    and how could you know…
    about the crescents on my palm
    in the land of the moon
    and if I clench my fist
    they lay in the exact place
    and are the exact curve
    of my nails
    and how could you know…
    well it sounds a bit mad
    but it feels more than right
    that I dream like movies
    made years in the future
    before they are written
    A dream of a white wizard
    by a stream in the forest
    the sun always shines
    Eternally April
    birds sing day and night
    Night and Day
    this beautiful being-he glows to me
    leads me to an alter
    with amethyst and rose quartz
    He places in my hand a clear crystal
    Heart
    bursting with golden filaments
    that spread from the center in a star burst
    it glitters in the dappled light
    I can barely fit it in my palm
    it’s heavy for it’s size
    throwing prisms onto the trees
    It is the most beautiful thing
    I’ve ever looked upon
    My own heart could burst
    it is implied I place this heart onto the alter so
    I do
    Druid,
    I’m not wishy washy
    when I say
    I remember
    dying in the deep cold sea
    These dreams refuse to be silenced
    I have tried my damnedest to drown them
    as I have drowned over n over
    the agony and panic
    Of knowing you’re at deaths door
    The peace and surrender
    That comes with acceptance
    Of the inevitable
    and I don’t question it
    cause it’s the only thing that was clear
    In that foggy life I’ve left
    I have had a few dreams of the 14th leaf
    I can hear a Voice in my dreams that reveals
    To me things I cannot hear
    but must believe
    Projection can’t be a Fire process
    Like the other 13
    They are the preparations
    Mercury is the process of the 14th
    the ancients said the moon follows mercury
    well shit son-what did they know?
    they though the world was flat the buffoons
    And a lifetime
    couldn’t possibly be long enough
    to wander with you
    To tell you what I’ve been shown
    It makes sense now, there is a point
    what you must know inside time being
    as you’ve glowed and been dimmed
    by fools and philistines
    Two thousand years
    I couldn’t give up this chance
    although I didn’t see it at first
    I could only feel it
    ya I doubt there’s much getting use to shivers and shudders
    In your soul
    Wow I can be so clear with my eyes closed
    and such a bumbler with em open!
    I was listening to you
    now I hear
    such joy and beauty in music
    never never stop
    maybe when we land
    Ha! If we ever do
    you can start a flight school
    for the children
    still locked in their closets
    grounded by the rents
    who demand that you respect their author it ty!
    as they march march march
    Over years years years
    white and crimson flags seeded with smallpox
    They tore down
    The beauty he revealed to them
    They branded her a whore
    when all that either of them truly wanted
    Was Love

    ~

  13. avatar
    MEM | 2 April 2007 at 2:33 am #


    it’s still sunday and

    i am a tree

    that grows

    and knows everything

    there is to know

    yet i cannot speak

    unless u listen

    and you are in those

    moments backlit in golden

    silence

    the true pain and joy

    of being here

    born into this

    life as we know it

  14. avatar
    CAPTAIN BEYOND | 2 April 2007 at 2:48 am #

    so me am taking it like me baby and sitting here once again waiting for nothing, when will this @#$%&! charade end???
    Hollywood

  15. avatar
    Anonymous | 2 April 2007 at 2:54 am #

    “and im looking for you somewhere
    but its too late
    im too far away
    barking up the wrong tree
    how was i to know?
    and in the world without you….”

    another beautiful entry that could be written about me
    or is that how we all feel? i guess that is where the magic lies when the wizardry is so clear and yet so entirely ambiguous.
    i was sure i understood the unsaid words,but waited for signs i couldn’t fully decipher. i thought i’d woken up and remembered.

    and now
    nothing

  16. avatar
    Music | 2 April 2007 at 3:29 am #

    Trust music

  17. avatar
    calling down baal and zeus | 2 April 2007 at 3:50 am #

    the hills are alive
    with the sound of music

  18. avatar
    ~ | 2 April 2007 at 4:09 am #

    darlin’
    you must know
    that I need to meet you
    no pause
    no coincidence
    no exit
    I will say it
    as many times
    and times as many
    I Love Thee

    I forgot
    I forgot my
    I forgot my camera
    when I went to A&J’s to take pics of J’s pedals
    I have never done this before!
    I hold you responsible!
    time beings must be in same time zone
    I’ll finally get some sleep
    when you’re around
    mmm…maybe
    ha!
    May still looks best
    tho too far away
    come to Cali
    I’ll beg if I have to!
    then we can go-
    anywhere in the World
    One by One

    ~

  19. avatar
    Leelinau | 2 April 2007 at 5:18 am #

    *_*

  20. avatar
    syrinx | 2 April 2007 at 5:23 am #

    Ouch.

    Aspirin won’t fix it. Nor absinthe.

  21. avatar
    the dean | 2 April 2007 at 5:53 am #

    an ice-cream container with eyes painted on it might help

  22. avatar
    Anonymous | 2 April 2007 at 6:37 am #

    Brilliant!

    “I’ll have what he’s having”
    -me

  23. avatar
    syrinx | 2 April 2007 at 8:04 am #

    2 pints’ worth Haagen-Daz Rum Raisin goggles!!

    yesssssssssssssssss

  24. avatar
    ~ | 2 April 2007 at 8:57 am #

    I have been a foolish
    and silly muse
    offered a one way ticket
    to paradise
    and I’m…
    …going to purchase a ticket
    to Sedona
    I’ve never been and always
    wanted to go
    I will post arrival time as soon as I have it

    ~

  25. avatar
    ~ | 2 April 2007 at 9:23 am #

    April 4th
    US Airways 272
    From Portland
    to Phoenix
    arrive 1:48pm

    ~

  26. avatar
    eek | 2 April 2007 at 9:30 am #

    Enjoyed the blog today, SK. Thanks!

    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    fantasticandy (which I always read as “fantastic candy”) — it was the incoherent bit, wasn’t it? 🙂

  27. avatar
    ...being here, doing this... | 2 April 2007 at 9:37 am #

    there is a great
    beauty
    in this form of
    communication

    freedom

    to be
    connected
    yet
    independent

    many use anonymity
    for destructive
    ends

    but anonymity
    can also be used
    gently
    wisely
    freely
    to awaken
    oneself and others
    to unseen
    opportunities

    this connection
    is born of
    Spirit

    so…even though
    in one sense
    it will pass…
    in another
    it remains
    the space through which
    all connections
    breathe

    it is not
    you
    me
    them
    that are important

    it’s
    us

    and us,
    although ever changing,
    will
    never
    end

  28. avatar
    Symon | 2 April 2007 at 10:07 am #

    “no one else could have written it”

    …..glad you’re still with us SK.

    Sounds like the journey has been long and hard at times…

    Shine on little light…

  29. avatar
    sue cee | 2 April 2007 at 2:54 pm #

    Maybe im going around in circles…circles might be safe

    ps did the doodles enjoy their day off school because of the tsunami danger? just heard the news.

    x

    ps restaurant mark, thanks Im great, just been away in a parallel universe for a while 🙂

  30. avatar
    John Garratt | 2 April 2007 at 3:16 pm #

    Listening to “Parallel Universe,” I hope, Sue Cee.

    John

  31. avatar
    John Garratt | 2 April 2007 at 3:16 pm #

    I’m sorry, that was kind of terrible.

    John

  32. avatar
    Chela | 2 April 2007 at 4:32 pm #

    …shakin’ through…

  33. avatar
    Anonymous | 2 April 2007 at 5:11 pm #

    “when you realise youve never been more alone
    when you realise that it must be over
    when no one can hear your thoughts
    where the ending should be or else
    and im looking for you somewhere
    but its too late
    im too far away
    barking up the wrong tree
    how was i to know?
    and in the world without you….”

    Perfect…
    At this moment in time, my thoughts exactly. Hope I can move on soon.

    Thanks SK

    Love D
    x

  34. avatar
    Anonymous | 2 April 2007 at 5:43 pm #

    Your a great man sk.
    Still Reading!
    -Allen
    Galveston TX

  35. avatar
    davem | 2 April 2007 at 7:35 pm #

    Utterly fantastic.
    Kept up with some of it – trailed in the wake of most. That’s your magic though. I’ll keep on running to try and catch up although it will take me many, many lifetimes.

  36. avatar
    Anonymous | 2 April 2007 at 9:23 pm #

    Is it just me or is something going down between SK and ~??????????

  37. avatar
    Anonymous | 2 April 2007 at 10:41 pm #

    still recovering from the devastating line you threw out yesterday:

    “being alone is not freedom”

    (although french vanilla ice cream with a butterfinger bar crushed into it, eaten while waiting for my neice’s birthday toys to be wrapped in the next store over certainly helped TODAY)

    – syrinx


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