posted on July 27, 2010 at 3:01 pm

a winters day in a deep n dark july


2nd post

how you liking this site so far

how you liking this sight so far

i was born in 1988 to a beautiful italian opera singer and a formula one driver who was also a billionaire and a secret crime fighter……..i was schooled at oxford cambridge the london school of eccy-gnomics harvard yale and that other place i forgot oh yeah n the sorbonne…i speak many languages : did you know australians have 23 different words for beer..i play many different instruments, the crumpled horn, the skinned flute, the rhythm method, the ear drum, the heart beat, the bass ball, the lead uke, the elbow harp, the car radio, the bong pipe, the sex cymbal, the horizontal cha cha, the zylo-phone, the humba mabumba, the karmatron and of course my main axe the tommy hawk, i am an expert at many martial arts including pinching pulling hair and dew jitsu, i have majored in the inhumanities and comparitive boasting. i spent the early years of my life on an unmanned sputnik listening to the music of the spheres and t wrecks …eventually i had pads n gaffs in nyc, la and imho and lol then i moved to syddley where i put together my dream band of hand selected players …however that didnt work out so i  manifested the crunch consisting of me, the tall one, the rockstarry one, and an old school bully called ward nicks who couldnt play drums but was good with nasty intimidation …eventually we replaced him with the nutty dutch guy and then eventually we got that small nice bloke from pneu zealand called pim towels…still extant today….all our records went linoleum in albania and we actually sold a cassette to someones mum accidentally outside a gig in wollongong once

of course i made  many disappearances on tv  ghosting australias top plop shows and onboard a ship as anchor, man…i made many films too directing producing fetching things and forging scripts for naughty codeine products, i been married many many times and have a loada children including my triplets amnesia, florence and the other one, i been dabbling in painting after doing a nice job in my laundry rolling  it cream including the spiders webs and a fly who was on the wall …of course i got arrested in nyc for impersonating a genius and have had treatment for my approaching sexagenarianism  also i am considered a pseudo thespian and i believe in homo sapien marriages and am anti diluvian kings

i cuurently live in bondi with my no cats n dogs n my bonsai tree called figgy who really truly ruly loveth me

please dispose of ttb products thoughtfully when finished and recycle my words to alleviate the great dictionary crisis i have narrowly averted

please examine the contents of your head…they may have shifted during this flight of fancy

i love ya!

ha ha

nevets yeblik!!!

30 Responses to “history of steve kilbey the untold unexpurgated storey with no flaws”

  1. avatar
    simonlawlor | 27 July 2010 at 3:17 pm #

    i can tell you’re excited and enjoying this – goes to show that the work that you (and the church do) isn’t yours – you’re a fan of it as well

  2. avatar
    cazziem | 27 July 2010 at 3:54 pm #

    Well how about that! Your life sounds so much similar to my own haha!
    Seriously though, it’s not quite 7:00am here in England and after yesterday great beginning to the new site, I could wait to see what comes next. So I thank you for this one cos it’s sending me off to work with a smile due to you ALWAY brilliant use of the English language, especially the last line: –

    ‘please examine the contents of your head…they may have shifted during this flight of fancy’

    Now all I want to top this is some European dates, or even better British dates, showing in the “up and coming shows”.

  3. avatar
    redgrevillea | 27 July 2010 at 4:01 pm #

    Clever clever!! You the master with words no disputing that!

    I was kinda born in late-1987 when UTMW came out. My world, at age 17, suddently turned three-dimensional.

    So I’m a year older than you!

    But there is no age, really, in that timeless and depthless place that always is.

    Loving the site – i hope to buy the bunny-print soon.

    Cheers! rb

  4. avatar
    Ellen | 27 July 2010 at 4:16 pm #

    Yea!! The TTB website is off and running … and off to a great start! So happy to see you with your very own site, Steve. I DO hope all is well with and your family, too. Here’s a big California hug for you this evening.

  5. avatar
    evilren | 27 July 2010 at 4:17 pm #

    I laughed and laughed some more, I’m Scottish, love the bong pipes! Early years on unmanned Sputnik eh?
    Now I’m choking… is that what happened to you? My poor bonsai, alas I treated her badly and she dropped her leaves– just a stick in the mud now–she was high maintenance anyway. I love this f@#king site already, way
    to start it off with a bang Steve. Thanks for keepin’ it unreal!



  6. avatar
    nick vee | 27 July 2010 at 4:37 pm #

    brilliant, steve.

    you’re a multimedia maven

  7. avatar
    andy | 27 July 2010 at 5:30 pm #

    this is the first time youv’e signed off as nevits for yonks…..

  8. avatar
    iris doe | 27 July 2010 at 5:40 pm #

    It’s A New Era !

  9. avatar
    edd | 27 July 2010 at 6:29 pm #

    Whoses Whates!

  10. avatar
    nylon burning | 27 July 2010 at 6:43 pm #

    shifting through here..this tiny preview window clever…oh theneverness hoax…of it all..

  11. avatar
    hellbound heart | 27 July 2010 at 8:49 pm #

    hoo-yeah!!!!! wanted to log in and have a sticky beak at things last night but my internet must’ve had pmt ‘cos it just wouldn’t cooperate… the super-deluxe new-and-improved site, nevets (i can call you that, can’t i?)

    love always (as always)……

  12. avatar
    Jasperina | 27 July 2010 at 10:04 pm #

    Steve that’s a bloody blogful of funny gems. Love the image of an excited Dame Edna Mum cassette in hand. Tids bits of the truth made it even more delectable.

  13. avatar
    Richard | 27 July 2010 at 10:16 pm #


    bondi’s own id nob

  14. avatar
    Freddie | 27 July 2010 at 10:31 pm #

    I am liking the site so far. Yep, I am.
    You lie so lovely and sincerely.
    But it’s good to see you come clean with the truth at last.

  15. avatar
    DJK082067 | 27 July 2010 at 11:00 pm #

    I guess my only concern with the new site was also mentioned by a reader yesterday, that ur daily blog looks like a “wall of words”. i dont believe that its only me who finds it a bit challenging on concentration to read ur daily entry. maybe a survey described to all by you may bring this to further attention. dont get me wrong- the site is fantastic, just a bit of concern i guess.

    Hey-Ben (stealth blue): whats going on with u and the misses, havnt heard from u lately, hope all is ok…

    As always,
    Darrin K. from Chicago

  16. avatar
    tendraftsdeep | 27 July 2010 at 11:23 pm #

    Really like the new site Brother!

  17. avatar
    woodstok | 28 July 2010 at 2:08 am #

    ahh 2B 21 again, but preferably retaining acquired knowledge. Don’t look back … look forward! Love that ‘examine contents of your head’ … but right now I think the advil liquigels and 20 mins to alleviate the headache will give me better options. Peace and love. W`

  18. avatar
    hippy | 28 July 2010 at 2:31 am #

    After two fantastic daze of this new website, now I am inspired and know what I must do: buy a bass and form my dream band, the TINY ENVIOUS PIGS! Our first hit single will be “Pleased to Meat Ewe,” a raving anti-vegetarian anthem. I hope it doesn’t offend you.

  19. avatar
    Andreas | 28 July 2010 at 4:14 am #

    Well but this is just great, you’re in a wonderful mood! And you have the right to be, the website is just looking great. I have listened to the unreleased tracks, beautiful stuff, can’t wait for more!

  20. avatar
    lmk | 28 July 2010 at 5:11 am #

    You are truly fabulous. I love it when you write like this! Sending you my admiration, love, and some gorgeous sunshine from summery New York! Congrats on this site- it’s great!!

    ps- Hope Aurora is all better.

  21. avatar
    colin | 28 July 2010 at 5:46 am #

    good onya

  22. avatar
    princey | 28 July 2010 at 10:38 am #

    Hey sk, congrats on the new site, it looks superb! Well done to all involved.
    I’m SO excited about the Melby Writers Festival with you as a special guest!, a perfect way to warm up the cold Melby nights we’ve been having here, I just can’t wait, it’s been too long!
    I hope you’ll still be posting a blog everyday like at the old site, keep up the brilliant work Killsy.
    Love Amanda

  23. avatar
    captain mission | 28 July 2010 at 12:32 pm #

    congratulations steve, it’s beautiful in here. i don’t know where to look first, lotta catching up to do, well done everyone involved.

  24. avatar
    ASSMIDGET | 28 July 2010 at 2:12 pm #

    Dont forget to check out the “Afghanistan War Diary 04-10”

    Largest leak of U.S. Military documents in history detailing a lost war full of cover ups. Civilian casualties, Enemy Victories, Betrayal all spun by the Networks (Gov PR Firms)
    Might keep ANon busy

  25. avatar
    davem | 28 July 2010 at 4:39 pm #

    Reading about Nick Ward in your biog was a hoot in parts. To be fair I thought he was a really good drummer from the one album we heard him on.

  26. avatar
    pennybridge | 28 July 2010 at 6:05 pm #

    Good luck with your new site,
    thanx for the free access and the good laugh today. (Asgarvar!)

    One little thing though …
    In my op. your sublime words need some space on the sides.
    Rimbaud, Baudelaire and Whitman didnt write prose either, right?

    Apart from that, the new site is much better
    We’re looking forward to another five years (at least)
    of goodies, truths and lovely lies.

  27. avatar
    Richard | 28 July 2010 at 7:26 pm #

    I’m with Broken Toys and Pennybridge on the format

    and maybe a slightly bigger font for the old squinters amongst us!

    • avatar
      SLJ | 30 July 2010 at 11:32 pm #

      The site is scaleable, you can increase the font size as needed through your browser 🙂

  28. avatar
    lily was here | 28 July 2010 at 8:07 pm #

    A thinker sees his own actions
    as experiments and questions
    –as attempts to find out something.
    Success and failure are for him
    answers above all.
    Friedrich Nietzsche,
    1844 – 1900, German

  29. avatar
    SLJ | 30 July 2010 at 11:34 pm #

    I think this post deserves a photo with a wry smile and a hint of a wink 😉

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