posted on May 30, 2006 at 9:06 am

good on ya belfrank
ya talked me into buying some manuka honey
it saved mah voice
it coated me throat
it gave me the energy
yer olde mum was right
i owe ya another one
take another knighthood
take another childhood
whatever
you saved my voices ass
(!?)
yes yes yes
what can i say
the hchcur were brilliant
we rocked
we rolled
we shook our beatle booties
2 shows
4 hours playin n singin
with a fucked throat
can only thank this miracle manuka honey
got me thru
the london audience were the best
people i say i love you
i love you
i thank you for making it what it was
yes i am an extremely charismatic talented man
handsome debonair suave
possessed with talent in spades
yes thats all true
but what am i without a lovely audience
like you guys n gals
to worship n adore me
and buy my merch
it was nice to meet ya all
it was nice to shake the babies
and kiss yer hands
you were great
i dont know what to say to ya always
you said some kind things
“steve, i just wanna say youre my fave singer ever
and you got me thru divorce/disease/the death of my budgie
ad without yer music i’d be a goner”
me “oh, thanks”
i mean what do ya say when people say that stuff
sometimes i cant cope
and i say goofy stuff
try and joke it away
people we designed this music to move ya
just sometimes its hard to deal with it
when ya tell us…
but i appreciate it
i appreciate you
in swedish
jag uppskatter er
you all mean something to me
we are all in this together
im making the music that you wanted to make yerself
ya just didnt have the obsession that i did
to learn to put it together
but im just doing what we all wanna hear in fucking pop music
you know stuff like feeling and evocation
and ambiguity and invocation
and all those ingredients robbie willy-ams
and fleety streety dont put in their cake
i dont why
its free
anyway
the shows were great
it was all goode
no complaints
no rants
people were so nice
chris squire from yes was there
one of the guys from garbage

this smorning
greeted by the horrendous sight
of 4 yankeee waddlers
so fuckin unbelievably fat
2 couples
one black n one white
the chairs can hardly contain em
and theyre tucking into their eggies n bacon n sausages
and croissants n more sausages
fucking turned mah stomach to see these hopeless slobs
feeding themselves to death
no older than me
they then struggled out of their seats
and probably broke the lift
cos these babies werent using the stairs
these blobs need a month on manuka honey
20 laps in the pool
i dunno
cmon say im cruel
but no
i say these things outta concern
stop eating all that shit people
im fucking nearly fifty 2
i rocked for 4 hours last nite
and still had more energy to go
its cos im careful with what i eat
and im careful to keep on moving
i saw some pics of me lassa nite from 2002
what bloated blob i was
before i started my regime
you gotta cultivate vitality
you gotta breathe in the sweet prana that permeates the universe
you gotta walk in the park and talk to the wind
you gotta save a struggling insects life
bless the fledglings in the nests
look at the individual blades of grass
regard the sky with wonder
feel the rain on yer face
get out of yer fluoro lit office
run n skip n jump
me n my doodles e and a
we skip to school everymorning
people say
there goes that olde hippy skipping with yon twinnies
but skipping is hard when ya 52
but its so good for ya
do something people
take up some thing
meditate
contemplate
read the gospels
read the gita
implore lord vishnu to fill yer heart
he cannot resist yer sincere prayers
he WILL speak to ya if ya but ask
f’rinstance
if im sitting home and a or e
half heartedly says “hey dad”
chances are i could ignore em
but if theyre screaming n crying for me
if i think they need me
i’ll be there inna flash
the heavenly mother/father is the same
all you have to do is ask
if yer asking in a cynical kinda show me what ya can do way
he aint gonna come
hes busy preserving protecting creating destroying
universes galaxies cosmos
he aint gonna answer yer phone call for some half assed thing
pray with every fibre of yer being
its hard
its hard to achieve that onepointed concentration
i was in rehab getting off the worst junk habit ever
i been shooting black tar heroin
i was so fucked up after 3 days in rehab
i didnt know what the fuck to do
i got down on my hands n knees
i got no pride left
look what i fucken done to myself
im spewing up green bile that burns my throat
im shaking sweating sneezing shivering
i m anxious like all harry
im insomniac
(the quack says mr kilbey
i just gave you enuff sleeping pills to knock out
a fucking horse, dude, i cant give ya anything more)
i cannot take it anymore
every junk starved cell in my body
is screaming in agony
i go down flat on my belly
to symbolise my total surrender
i pray
i say dearest lord vishnu
dearest krishna
sweet govinda
i am yer child
i cant take this
they say that youll never dish out more than we can take
and now i cant take any more
i put it in your hands
if you out there god
if you listning to your sad n fucked up childe
please now is the time…
im concentrating on this prayer 100 %
its my only hope
this is all true
then the lord
by his extraordinary mercy n grace
he came down into my head
filled my heart n body
soothing warm loving unspeakably beautiful presence
my dear child he says to me in a whisper in my heart
lie back down now and sleep
i lay on my bed
the pain HAS ALL SUBSIDED
i immediately fall into a lovely lucid dream
me n krishna walking the vrindavan, krishna loka
(his own place)
we talk of this n that
i wake up
ive slept for one hour
im refreshed
they fucken bloodtest n piss test me
in the rehab joint
cos they reckon im back on the gear
such was my rapid recovery
of course as my ego kicked back in..
(ego: well of course god would dig ME)
i got sick again
but my sweet lord saved my ass
i dont care if you dont believe this
i know what happened
i dont need to impress ya with some fony baloney
i have never achieved that level of contact since
but i know hes out there
listening to our prayers
consolation available
this is all a test
youre here to learn
god dont intervene
we have free will
he dont strike down the hitlers
or stop the tidal waves
he cant make 2 and 2 equal 5 either
but hes out there loving you thru all yer lives
i had to become a smack addict
i needed some humilty n compassion
i needed to see how the other half was “living”
i had only been a winner
i needed to lose
that was my lesson
i thank the lord for it
i dinnae care bout the houses and studios n cars
n rare fender guitars i put up my arm
fuck that
its just stuff
but it was worth it all
so i got in such a badde way
that i had nothing left
but god
and he was there for me
he’ll be there for you too
and one day
maybe in a million years time
we will see why all the pain was necessary
for our growth
its hard to understand it now
lord why did my daughters have to get cysts in their brains
lord why did ya take grantley from us
why auntie weenie
why god why
its like yer kids asking you why they cant have ten icecreams fer breakfast
guys, you wont understand yet
its for yer own good
i could buy ya ten icecreams
but you wont thank me for it eventually
thats how it is with god
you cant understand her
you cant blame god for the evil men do
thats what this earth is for
to work it all out
its a heartbreaker
believe me, i know
but there IS a reason
dont fall into despair
dont let some idiot in a lab coat tell ya
god is a stimulated cortex in yer brain n nothing more
dont blame lord vishnu for the inquisition
or the holocaust
or yer kitten dying
it doesnt work like that
im not trying to fool you
god is here
in you n me
in everything
we are all part of the one big thing
separation is an illusion
love people n theyll love you
everybody, even hitler, even genghis fucking khan
they all need want love
its an obstacle course
get with it
try yoga
yoke your heart to gods
see where it can take ya
im living proof
i turned it around
anyone can
it aint easy
but its the very very best
the sweetest nectar
the most divine ambrosia
when ya know
it AINT all for nothing
you can write in and quote niels bohr
or kierkagard or nitszcheor whoever the fuck
satre or any other aetheistic “facts” you like
the rishis knew it all ten thousand years ago
the stuff our “scientists” are only beginning to suss
this is all vibration
nothing is really real
we can change things with our thoughts
we can change n improve n become more
than we ever thought
its up to you
its up to me
im heading off to spain now baybee
madrid is calling me
some latin passion
some spanish wine
i love you fiendss
speak to ya tomorrow
stevie k

48 Responses to “honey, i shrunk my larynx”

  1. avatar
    Altres | 30 May 2006 at 10:26 am #

    Steve, you guys were fabulous last night. The banter was hysterical, a career in stand-up awaits if the music thing doesn’t work out. ;D

    love and respect,

    Brian

  2. avatar
    davem | 30 May 2006 at 10:36 am #

    Thanks for last night Steve.
    Great to see you looking so happy.
    Thanks for caring enough to share your thoughts & to come and visit us in blighty too. Hope you feel better about England again.
    You must have felt the love for you last night! It was huge.
    love you more,

    Dave
    xx
    PS Safe trip to Spain. Hope you get some sunshine after all this English rain. You deserve it.

  3. avatar
    RA | 30 May 2006 at 10:43 am #

    Bugger. Missed it. Glad you all had a ball. Was thinking of you all (band and warm loving crowd) whilst i put the kids to bed and then went back downstairs to listen to ULTC with a glass of red.

    I once went a great veggie restaurant in Madrid, but can’t remember the name or find it mow in the book. Near the “opera” underground station as I remember.

    Enjoy the spanish red. Greatest wine in the world IMHO. I love a heavy Navarra chilled on a warm night.

    Peace and good happiness stuff,

    Richard

  4. avatar
    Anonymous | 30 May 2006 at 11:20 am #

    on fire dude…im gonna fuck myself up just to be reborn hey…maybe not…

  5. avatar
    veleska1970 | 30 May 2006 at 11:30 am #

    glad to hear the honey worked for you. honey’s always good for the throat, especially after a coughing fit.

    a very profound and straight-from-the-heart blog today, steve. that you have suffered through the lowest point in your life and came out of it so alive and renewed is remarkable.

  6. avatar
    fergal | 30 May 2006 at 12:07 pm #

    we won’t listen to the lizard part of our brains …

    [i was on nine mile beach this morning]
    ~

  7. avatar
    davem | 30 May 2006 at 12:31 pm #

    Can’t shake of the image of you skipping to school each day…………

  8. avatar
    davem | 30 May 2006 at 12:34 pm #

    Soz…I meant off…I’m not usually short of an f or 2

  9. avatar
    sue cee | 30 May 2006 at 12:41 pm #

    Manuka comes from the land of the long white cloud, where all good things originate from.

    Was actually nodding my head all the way down the blog this time, gracias for your time! And yeah, skipping is not just childs play, its harder than it looks 🙂 Im right with the visual as long as it didnt include rope!

  10. avatar
    sue cee | 30 May 2006 at 12:44 pm #

    Well, i would say that, tongue in cheek 🙂 Tim’s also a kiwi

  11. avatar
    Anonymous | 30 May 2006 at 1:07 pm #

    Rock on Steve..

    Great words…

    Something inside me has been rekindled.
    “A fire burns inside me..”

    Hope to see ya in the states soon.

    Brian Turner
    Atlanta, Ga.

  12. avatar
    zero the hero | 30 May 2006 at 1:52 pm #

    I`ve said it before I say it again. Now I know why I`m drawn towards your music. You`re right, it`s all vibration vibrating, music, words, the world. And it`s all about Emptiness taking on Form before returning back to Emptiness. Unrealreallyunreal.Vibrating.
    Didn`t know your daughters had a cyst removed. I went through a major brainoperation myself a few years back, removing a cyst. Hope they`re well and fine. Your blog today was spot on! Moving.

  13. avatar
    Anonymous | 30 May 2006 at 1:52 pm #

    Terrific evening of banter, memories and astonishingly good new songs. Don’t be strangers… Lotta love in the room

    And you were bang on about early Japan, I always thought there was a link there….

  14. avatar
    Anonymous | 30 May 2006 at 1:58 pm #

    Great show Steve,one of the best ive seen ( first being Venue,Victoria Oct 82).

    Good to see you’re happy,loved the Jim ‘Wayne’ Kerr / Bowie improvisation – SPOOKY!

    Would have liked after to have chewed the cud with you re Bolan ( i bought your orig painting ) and the first T.Rex lp – last train was looming – next time perchance?

    OM….

    Steve

  15. avatar
    flowerpower | 30 May 2006 at 1:59 pm #

    Woah!… Know whatcha mean sk!
    Prayed one gray arvo with Nessun Dorma pumping loudly through the stereo..praying that what we might have conceived was loved but we weren’t “ready” yet. It was totally intense, body heaving with intent. Next morning phone 9am phone call “phil…you’re out of the woods…2am last night” etc..

  16. avatar
    CeciliaGin | 30 May 2006 at 3:02 pm #

    More info on Manuka Honey:
    http://www.manukahoneyusa.com/ManukaHoney.htm
    So glad it worked!
    Buena suerte en Madrid!
    Cecilia

  17. avatar
    gavgams | 30 May 2006 at 3:25 pm #

    Fair go, Steve, about Kiergekaard. There ain’t many more profoundly spiritual souls than he. http://www.abc.net.au/rn/encounter/
    stories/2005/1484848.htm#

    As for Nietzsche he saw the power of some music as ripping apart the veil of Maya. His beef was the creation of afterworlds to which this world stands in negation. He also believed in eternal recurrence.

  18. avatar
    CSTCoach | 30 May 2006 at 3:37 pm #

    Thank you, Steve.

    These things do all come out in your music. Or rather, they come across, intangibly, transmitted through vibration. They leave a feeling behind them. Can’t think of any other way to describe it.

    Safe travels.

    ryan

  19. avatar
    Anonymous | 30 May 2006 at 4:21 pm #

    > this smorning
    > greeted by the horrendous sight
    > of 4 yankeee waddlers
    > so fuckin unbelievably fat
    > 2 couples
    > one black n one white
    > the chairs can hardly contain em

    i found some hatched pods in the spare room a a friend’s house. i thought my friends had looked a bit large since i last saw them, now the truth is known. the *real* merkins are hatching.. all that “normal”/skinny stuff was just a cover to build up the population so it could explode. literally. i hope. “ugly american” has expanded its definition.

  20. avatar
    Anonymous | 30 May 2006 at 4:22 pm #

    Steve, I believe you. Truly. I wonder – and I say this with no cynicism whatsoever – Must we call God by a name? Be it Vishnu, Buddha or JC, I’ve never been able to give into it. I’ve felt something in a mushroom, in a concert hall, on a trail in the mountains and talking to my animals, but never in a book or in prayer, and certainly not in a Church. The parents are Christians, liberal folk who try to live a good life and help others, voting against the American fascists; all the right things. They have more peace. But absolutes are suspicious to me. I don’t know you, but it’s easy to see the transformation you’ve experienced. I’m curious to hear what you have to say about the labels ascribed to spirituality…eventually at least, some day.

  21. avatar
    Xevi CP | 30 May 2006 at 4:43 pm #

    Have fun in Spain and in Euskadi, Steve. Too bad you’re not coming to Barcelona. It’s been 16 years since your last visit here, guys. I’ve never had the chance to see you live.
    Take care,
    Xevi

  22. avatar
    Queen Hatshepsut | 30 May 2006 at 4:54 pm #

    Hmmm…I always thought Mick and the boys put a good spin on it…
    ‘You can’t always get what you want
    but if you try sometimes
    you get what you need.’

    Congrats on the rockin’ shows! Wish I could’ve been there. Thanks for the heartfelt blogge today. I’m glad you did this; it really shows a side of you I don’t think any of us could ever get from a few crazy minutes backstage. Best of luck in Madrid!

    love,
    denise
    xxoo

    p.s. sorry about those Yanks…America doesn’t seem to comprehend the concept of ‘too much!’ For your reading pleasure/ consideration: “American Mania: When More is Not Enough” by Peter Whybrow. Excellent!

  23. avatar
    Joe Burns | 30 May 2006 at 6:01 pm #

    Amen Brother!

    I had to laugh at the bit where you say you just don’t know what to say to the folks that come up to tell you that you are their favorite singer, or that your music changed their life…

    Each time I’ve had the privelege to meet you and shake your hand, I’ve beaten myself up in some ridiculous internal monologue thinking “what can I possibly say to him that’s going to mean anything, or come even close to thanking him for what he’s given me…”

    Funny to think on the otherside of that handshake your askin’ yourself what you could possibly say in return…

    I guess all we really have is the music. What Mark Burgess called “The Everlasting Now” that is music. The only medium that breaks time, expanding within it and makes us experience the beginning, middle and end as one whole now tied together with rhythm and melody.

    Not much else to say other than ‘thanks’ Steve, and ‘see you on the other side’.

  24. avatar
    CAPTAIN BEYOND | 30 May 2006 at 6:39 pm #

    el momento descuidado…
    mjnjr

  25. avatar
    Anonymous | 30 May 2006 at 7:09 pm #

    I’m a cute american…

  26. avatar
    Elduvik | 30 May 2006 at 7:13 pm #

    Steve please read this….
    I was there last night at the borderline, first row in front of you, both shows, you were just great, you were singing & playing EXACTLY what I was feeling… your todays post says it all. You’ve been with me for 15 years now, your music is my autoanalysis, it is my compass through life, Ive been through highs and lows with it, you’ve never let me down. I had to fucking take a plane back to Italy early today so I missed the after show, but (you cant remember this) two years ago ad the Mean Fiddler, before the show, you were talking to dick strange and I interrupted , just to shake hands with you and to tell you how important you art is for me… please never stop doing this, it’s really too important and meaningful. I know it sounds stupid, and clearly if english was my mother tongue i could perhaps find some more clever words, but this is just to tell you how much you mean to me- to all of us here I guess.
    Theres something flowing, you know? During the second show I was just praying that you’d do Buffalo– 5 seconds after, you said, why don’t we play Buffalo– that’s my best song ever. That’s love flowing. The audience was great, because you four were just great. One can’t get any better than that.

    T H A N K S for being there-

    hare Krishna

    Andreas
    Genoa/Italy

  27. avatar
    Anonymous | 30 May 2006 at 7:26 pm #

    You say the hills too steep to climb
    cliiimbing
    yu say you like to see me try
    well ill try, in my own way
    just waiting for the right day

    my dear sk
    I could feel the soul burn in your confession
    at last you stand triumphant
    enbolden by the truth of your realization
    REALIZATION, hallelujah, Om tat sat OM
    no need for the old news, for bickering
    the mind is soothed by prayer and affirmation in being
    times are tough, its easy to falter,
    to give into Maya and forsake your soul
    I applaud you brother, cus you sang Those songs
    a song about a day… a day in a life..
    you did and thats why people say Bless you
    your a cool cat, your in alot of hearts
    fucking love life y’all
    Pray for love
    pray that we all feel it
    pray thru the suffrin and smilin
    I cant type anymore,
    gonna listen to some ELO: Out of the blue
    and Im going roller skating ha ha!
    have you some fun in Madrid
    wish I could..
    peace..

    jaime r………

  28. avatar
    Anonymous | 30 May 2006 at 7:55 pm #

    Steve and the rest of the crew, thanks for last night’s sets. A truly great display of talent and humour. 2 Siblings mighty impressed to see you guys live having been drip-fed Church classics throughout their lives. Due to the “Last Train” Syndrome had to miss the end of the 2nd set. Would’ve welcomed the chance to dally further. Next time we’ll book into a hotel ! Don’t leave it too long before you come back. We (UK) may be small in number but we are peerless (Pier less ?) in quality. Great Blog today –

    Cheers again – Richard (Liphook Hants UK)

  29. avatar
    John Garratt | 30 May 2006 at 8:02 pm #

    Does any honey work? My choir teacher told me to mix equal parts honey, whiskey, and lemon juice.

  30. avatar
    juniper | 30 May 2006 at 8:15 pm #

    Oh! Now I hate meself for bein’ a fatty….Glad you had good shows, though! I believe in Leonard Cohen! :~)

  31. avatar
    Brian Turner | 30 May 2006 at 9:28 pm #

    Enjoy the wine that Spain has to offer. I love wine from Spain…

    Rock on Kilbey…

    Brian Turner
    Atlanta, Ga

  32. avatar
    Nige | 30 May 2006 at 9:32 pm #

    Just one word for last night: EUPHORIA

    Thank you SK et al

  33. avatar
    Anonymous | 30 May 2006 at 10:26 pm #

    Ahhhh, dear Steven…today’s blog is exactly why I’ve stayed so close to your music for so many years…your honesty…how refreshing…also, is Manuka Honey listed on the stock exchange? There’s going to be a damn rush on it now…

  34. avatar
    Anonymous | 30 May 2006 at 11:35 pm #

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  35. avatar
    Samosanx | 30 May 2006 at 11:36 pm #

    Way to go SK.

    I get sleeping pills and an ecg from the Doctor. Off work, nursing sorrow, can’t talk to anyone (they all want chatter), go into the second hand bookshop, and buy two friends – one of them is the Law of Love, by Laura Esquivel, “a novel with music”. Comes with a cd. At chapter 3,”listen to track one” (madama Butterfly, btw)

    First chapter set in Spain.

    I sit reading in the late afternoon silence and light, feeeling that certain hum, of the gentle universe, of G’s smile, that lovely smile.
    In the book, Azucena stops by a maricahi band. Simultaneously, outside my window a car pulls up, playing mariarchi music.

    I know this sounds like a blog, not a comment. But what I mean to say is, cosmic conconciousness, the universe, art, music, poetry, salve my sorrows….mixes and blends with what you just said SK, about all things universal, all sorrows, all connections, all meanings….

    I knew you’d rock. Thanks for keeping your finger on the pulse and encouraging us to do the same.

    Lovexxx

  36. avatar
    Anonymous | 30 May 2006 at 11:51 pm #

    Today, Steve, your blog has moved me just as much as your music has done so many times in the past.
    Enjoy Spain
    Warm wishes
    Mark Moldre

  37. avatar
    Anonymous | 31 May 2006 at 12:16 am #

    If you never did another blog it wouldnt matter – that was the most poignant & heartfelt piece ever from you & I think i’ll send this to my mum.
    Isnt there a suburb in Canberra called Manuka – now there’s a paradox.
    Happy travels.

    Dutch Pierre

  38. avatar
    mike a | 31 May 2006 at 1:17 am #

    Your blog title today cracked me up!

    Glad your voice was back for the two gigs!! I wish I could have been there – it sounds like you guys were great.

    I have to say that this was your best blog yet – straight from the heart – how do you find the time?

  39. avatar
    Anonymous | 31 May 2006 at 1:30 am #

    Thank you, thank you, thank you Lord Vishnu for saving sk. You saved him from a world of misery and brought him back to life for us to have and love forever. Thank you, thank you, Lord V from the bottom of my little heart.

    Love you always,
    Amanda P

  40. avatar
    veleska1970 | 31 May 2006 at 1:56 am #

    “Anonymous said…
    Hi, i was looking over your blog and didn’t
    quite find what I was looking for…..”

    friggin spammers!!! butt out!! this is a serious blog here!!!!!!!

  41. avatar
    abtom0104 | 31 May 2006 at 3:30 am #

    SK

    Not being a religious person, I have found your views on religion and your experiences with your dark days and how you pulled through actually quite fascinating.

    Having seen what influence and effect religion can have on people with regards to the many wars over recent years, it’s nice to read about the positives one’s faith has achieved, and the highs you now get from it.

    I sound like a a broken record Stevie old cock old boy, but I find your daily tales fascinating and look forward to each and every instalment.

    Good luck with the rest of the tour and I can’t wait to see you in the flesh in Melbourne town later in the year.

    JD

  42. avatar
    captainmission | 31 May 2006 at 3:40 am #

    I’m with annon aka amanda p, 11.30pm.

  43. avatar
    eek | 31 May 2006 at 6:43 am #

    Glad everything is going well.

    Take care.

  44. avatar
    jeanz | 31 May 2006 at 7:02 am #

    Hi Steve

    So sad I missed the London shows. I’m not very lucky when it comes to Church gigs I’m afraid. Something always crops up.

    Thought I’d tell you this.
    I don’t know if you remember Gaggu , a friend of mine , posted a few times on Hotelwomb.
    Anyways he’s currently running the famous/ infamous pub here in Valletta (Malta) called ….er….The Pub. Its the very same place were Oliver Reed drank himself to death .(he literally collapsed and died in there).This was during the time when he was filming Gladiator.
    Anyway I thought you’d get a buzz in knowing that Gaggu has had ULTC on repeat since I got him the cd.
    Oliver Reed must be rolling in his grave.

    Thanks for the blog.

    jean

  45. avatar
    Sweed | 31 May 2006 at 8:22 am #

    Excellent blog!!!

    Uppskattar dig. Väldigt mycket.

  46. avatar
    stealthblue | 31 May 2006 at 6:13 pm #

    Steve,
    In the most respectful and spiritual way…I love you, brother. We all love you. Thank you tons for sharing your deep self. Powerful words that hit home in a huge way. I thank the Divine Essence for the likes of people like you and the “groop”…all of us birds need to stick together. Peace to you always and lots o’health on the road. Feeling very blessed,
    B.V. (Chicago, IL)

  47. avatar
    Freaky | 2 June 2006 at 10:43 pm #

    SK – great concert! My favourite song from the evening (your 9pm show) was Two Places at Once. Marty was on top form and you weren’t so bad yerself matey.

    Go the Kilbster.

  48. avatar
    Anonymous | 21 July 2006 at 11:26 pm #

    Great site lots of usefull infomation here.
    »


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