i am here and i’m hurting

first of all my daughter miranda is having an op

same op on the same condition that laid her sister so low about 5 years back

a cyst growing between the spine n the skull

my daughter miranda is my eldest

she is the sweetest kindest most easy going person

tomorrow shes having the surgery

she should be fine

her sister got every complication going and she was really ill

but miranda should be fine

(we all call her minna which is a name she came up with herself

when she was about 1 year old)

yeah but i thought i better come anyway

i am met at airport by minna and boyfriend leo

a very nice chap indeed who is about 6 feet 5 inches tall

i’m gonna be staying in minnas flat while shes in hospital

it should take about a week for her to get out

but there will be a lot of pain and therefore morphine involved

minna certainly looks a bit like a very young me

especially her cheeks and her chin

she is extremely slender and has dark brown floppy straight hair

she is and always has been a delightful person to be with

i havent seen her for a while and it has made me sad

she is much more like her mother karin in personality than me

needless to say i love her to bits and i wish i could have this op for her

after breakfast we catch up with elektra who is her twin sister

elektra is identical to minna …isnt she…?

well as you know there are 2 kinds of twins

identical twins

and fraternal (like eve n aurora are)

however a third kind of twin has been postulated

that is  : 2 of fathers sperms penetrate 1 egg

so from mother they are identical

but from father there is 2 different sets of DNA

i believe this is what elli and minna are

because they are identical but they also are not identical

you have to see em to see what i mean

elektra or elli is (personality-wise) the most like me of all 5 kids

and that leads to clashes i guess

nonetheless it is good to see her and we are getting along better

i meet her boyfriend adrian too who is a record company guy

now elli n minna have a band or a duo called saint lou lou

and they have made a single

and i think its unbelievably fucking good

their voices together are superb…..

.http://www.popjustice.com/songs/saint-lou-lou-maybe-you/

apparently there are a lot of record companies knocking at their door too

anyway

i went to bed at 630 last night and i slept 12 hours

the most nightmarish dazed and distorted slumber ive ever had

(you can well imagine my nightmares…theyre doozies..even to me!)

i woke up at one stage and prayed

sweet god in heaven ..cant you send me one nice dream?

(but i guess he couldnt…)

anyhow i’m up now and i feel like ive just taken every drug in the world

and had every drink in the world

and that the all blacks rugby team  just used me for field goal practice

man i feel so bad

ive had a lotta jet lag

but holy hell

this one is the absolute pits

(maybe i got something else on the plane besides my veggie meal!?)

so have pity on me

im all sixes and sevens

minnas op is tomorrow and im nervous

and i’m sitting here at her table writing this to you

by the way

i’m thinking of having a time being t shirt made for myself

to replace my ” ruining things as usual ” t shirt

tell me what you think

“i bring out the worst in everyone i meet”

its true

somehow i always manage to do that

even tho i try and i try not to

whats that all about?

strangers love me oh yes

but people who know me usually find me “troublesome”

i guess thats just my burden

anyway

the 2 new songs will be available in a week for download

hope you enjoy!

thinking of you all from these northern climes

sk