posted on September 2, 2013 at 11:20 am
its not about me

its not about me

the show in LA has sold out

the orchestral show is on 21st september the great hall sydney uni

i believe tickets are going fast

its gonna be huge

i am guest at brisbane writers festival from sept 4 to sept 8

i will be playing reading and blah blah blah-ing over numerous events

my art exhibition is on in LA Oct

its called the ancient world like my song

gods and geezas and gurls from the good ole days you know

its on at Century Guild (great name!) Culver City

Yes i will be there

meanwhile

i have a tendency to bring out the worst in people

my genius and idiot are too irreconcilable i suppose

i am constantly confronted with baffling ethical problems concerning my work

remember this

i am self taught in everything i do

i figured it all out the hard way

i worked long and hard at all my crafts

and i aim for being the best

although i can never achieve it , my aim remains so nonetheless

i literally dreamt all this up

it may surprise you that i encounter much turbulence as i try to deliver

a lot of it of my own making

the idiot and the genius get it mixed up from time to time

its not easy

just cos you can write some songs doesnt mean you know how to do the right thing

sometimes there is no right thing

just a lesser of 2 wrongs things

at age 4 i could recite probably 5 grown up poems complete with emphases

i was thrust onstage at age 6 to recite poetry in the wollongong town hall in 1962

i wrote my first song at 10

i wrote my first good poem at 16

ive been immersed in this long and hard

i get in a lot of disagreements and stalemates with people

heroin knocked me out of the ring for 10 years

a lot of things happened i just looked on

almost everything i do involves someone feeling upset about something

i upset em rehearsing

i upset em painting

i upset em sleeping

i upset em waking up

when i lose win or draw someone somewhere is upset

yet i am the bloke dreaming this up

however i am neither firm nor unfirm but wavering

i prevaricate second guess i get it right sometimes wrong

i cant be good at everything and i am certainly not

sometimes i think of alexander and the gordian knot

well i have had to move forward or like a shark i will drown

some things change

somethings remain the same

all of you who read my stuff presumably because you like me

none of you know how hard the idiot in me fights other people

so that the genius’ good ideas can be heard

sometimes i dont even know who or why or what i’m fighting

other times i am simply stopped in my tracks by something or someone

it takes me a long time to get liftoff velocity but now again i have it

remember this too

from the very get-go i have had people telling me how to do it

and people tell me how i shouldnt do it

skeletons in closets , dirty laundry , half a century of blab

theres a lot of creating and theres a lot of fighting

ive done my best

i did my best

and ย i decided i aint listening to anybody

i dont come round your place and tell you how to do what you do

sometimes i have to assess things and make unpopular decisions

but they are decisions about my own affairs and you gotta trust me

or not

actually whatever you like

my ONLY allegiance is to my own muse

if that is stymied then i have to change things

but no one not even me has all the facts

in fact sometimes it is an unpopular way or no way at all

whatever anybody in this world says or writes about my own stuff

i will do it my way

and when i decide i am doing it i am not gonna stop

and thats the end of it now

for the time being

 

 robbery with violins

robbery with violins

 

 

 

 

54 Responses to “life etc”

  1. avatar
    John Garratt | 2 September 2013 at 11:54 am #

    My solution; don’t do any of the above.

    But I don’t do that to avoid conflict/controversy. I’m just lazy. And I got no ideas. Ever.

  2. avatar
    John James | 2 September 2013 at 11:57 am #

    “i have a tendency to bring out the worst in people
    my genius and idiot are too irreconcilable i suppose”

    Jesus, I loved these lines Steve! Relate to that feeling 100% ๐Ÿ™‚

  3. avatar
    cheryl | 2 September 2013 at 12:00 pm #

    To thy own self be true. Rock on SK!

  4. avatar
    Kohl Ette | 2 September 2013 at 1:13 pm #

    Why wasn’t I invited to Wollongong to hear you recite? Oh that’s ok, I wasn’t quite born yet. If I’d known you existed around then I would’ve invited you to the paddo townhall to see my class do ballroom dancing (ugh!) when I was about 7. Caused at least one class mate to wag school to avoid rehearsals and I got a kick in my shins from my partner for making a wrong step! Sorry I digress. You would have been 17 and much too cool ๐Ÿ™‚

  5. avatar
    Bernadette Keys | 2 September 2013 at 2:00 pm #

    You haven’t upset me.
    Thats what I was talking about the other day – there’s always someone wanting a fight. Goes with being a star I guess.
    love to all killfairs xxx

  6. avatar
    zuma77 | 2 September 2013 at 2:05 pm #

    Reminds me of the sentiment in the Townes doco ‘Be Here To Love Me’ about throwing everything off to be a songwriter ..security, comfort, even love ..not disregarding them, just not letting any of ’em tie you down & keep you away from the discovery ..nice words sk & best wishes for future ventures ..

  7. avatar
    catherine.meeson@live.vu.edu.au | 2 September 2013 at 2:33 pm #

    Your blog called me an imposter!

    I preferred to be a faceless name
    no matter,
    sounds like all is as it should be, true for you ๐Ÿ™‚ xx Keep being you, hope you get some vid or pics of the exhibition in the u.s, to share with the home folk. Who said the muses were ever friends?, my bet is they tear each others eyes out and cut off each others tongue,and all the folk in the village down below grimace and applaud and bey for more blood! sorry folks….. no blood here no more,.,.. only the transmuted stuff ……

    “my aim remains ” ๐Ÿ™‚ love to you S.K

  8. avatar
    SAW | 2 September 2013 at 2:59 pm #

    words to live by. by and by. come hell or high. try and try. buh bye.

  9. avatar
    Melissa | 2 September 2013 at 4:38 pm #

    ‘and i decided i aint listening to anybody’

    GOOD!!!

    I’ve decided the same thing myself recently ๐Ÿ™‚

    Actually, one of the most powerful lessons has come back to me a few months ago….. always follow your will, as long as it’s with loving intention.

    Love is the law, right? x

    • avatar
      JW | 6 September 2013 at 4:23 am #

      actually it doesn’t say ‘follow your will’

      ‘Let Thy Will Be done not mine’

  10. avatar
    Jeffrey Von Stetten | 2 September 2013 at 6:28 pm #

    Will you personally be at the show in LA Mr.Steve Kilbey? ๐Ÿ™‚ it would be nice to meet you. I’ll bring hemp. ๐Ÿ™‚

  11. avatar
    isolde | 2 September 2013 at 6:30 pm #

    Bravo!

  12. avatar
    Chris | 2 September 2013 at 8:34 pm #

    I’ve been to all four courners of the world
    all got one thing in common….
    They keep on knocking, knocking on my door
    It’s like they follow me wherever I go

    Don’t get me wrong
    the attention feels good
    but all I want is to find a real Love

    Red light, break time
    lately I’ve been feeling like
    they all tryin’ a get a piece of me
    it’s like they all tryin’ a get a piece of me
    Red light, hold up, I’m just trying find out
    why they all tryin’ get a piece of me
    it’s like they all tryin’ a get a piece of me

    Claude Kelly

  13. avatar
    kell | 3 September 2013 at 12:18 am #

    It’s what we love about you Steve. And you won’t always have to fight. Imagine that…?

  14. avatar
    The Sign of Fire | 3 September 2013 at 2:08 am #

    Hi Steve,
    Just want to say I’ve been listening to The Idyllist a lot this summer and am enjoying very much. Thank you for making it.

  15. avatar
    Steven Krut | 3 September 2013 at 4:20 am #

    Perhaps all the conflict is what keeps your muse so sharp. Kind of a Yin and Yang of creative energy.

  16. avatar
    MF | 3 September 2013 at 5:42 am #

    The George Ellis news has made me think……. Will the Psychedelic Symphony show ever be released on DVD???? I have been waiting for this forever!!!!! Thanks.

  17. avatar
    redgrevillea | 3 September 2013 at 4:30 pm #

    Perseverance and self-learning are great virtues, ones that become more important to me as I grow older. You are a great artist, much respect.

  18. avatar
    mlw | 3 September 2013 at 4:31 pm #

    I relate to your writings, and it has inspired me to start–a creative outlet I have approached with wreckless abandon. Thanks and I look forward to reading more. My first is “The Bird and the Lilac”.

  19. avatar
    Anonymous | 3 September 2013 at 5:43 pm #

    Stop the non-sense. I stopped rite at idiot/genius mix-up. I’ll resume later. You have everyone’s love no matter what…you know that. Can almost see that puppy-dog face. Stop apologizing cos there’s more reason now to take better care of yourself. Could be wrong about this whole thing, though. But Over & Out for now….

  20. avatar
    andy | 4 September 2013 at 8:53 am #

    y’know….yer frailty is your most appealing/appaling aspect!
    cocksure yet unsure at the same moment…sure would like to shoot the breeze with you sometime kilbs.
    hey..a strange thing, went over to a client’s house yesterday to fix his computer…as he opens the door i hear the strains of ‘unexpected’ an olde dudes of neptune song!
    i say, do you like these guys then? he tells me, yeah good aren’t they, i just stumbled on ’em a few days ago on spotify!!!!!!!!!!!!
    i didn’t even know we were on spotify…let alone the entire cannon of work.
    and when he said, where did you hear of them then, i pretty much had a laughing fit.
    take care hero,
    love ya,
    andy.

    • avatar
      thetimebeing | 4 September 2013 at 10:14 am #

      spotify eh? gee youll make a halfpenny from that

      • avatar
        John Garratt | 5 September 2013 at 10:34 am #

        My wife and I ended up on Spotify…you can hear me ripping off the Church.

  21. avatar
    eekie | 4 September 2013 at 10:01 am #

    Sometimes you have to do what you have to do.
    That is life.
    For everyone.

  22. avatar
    Kohl Ette | 4 September 2013 at 2:21 pm #

    Dear man, thank you for the book received this afternoon between ballet class and another mundane trip not worth mentioning (in a sense). And thank you for the very sweet message. Means a lot to me. I don’t think I’ve ever looked forward more to reading something. There are a few things in the immediate way, like going to work tomorrow but that makes the expectation of quality leisure even better. Life can be too hard and then so good at times. To be treasuread. Always loved you bum notes which I don’t really hear anyway and all. Btw I wonder why you spelled my name the way you did compared to last time you signed something for me. I guess it’s not important. Thanks exceedingly. KE

  23. avatar
    dream on | 4 September 2013 at 9:41 pm #

    that bell curve thing, some hate, some love, most like

  24. avatar
    hellbound heart | 5 September 2013 at 3:51 pm #

    yep, the whole yin-yang thing…..saint versus asshole and I know that song well-just hope that the good outweighs the bad in the long run….
    anyway, you can’t be all bad….thankyou for the lovely autograph in my book-was (and still am) absolutely stoked by this-THANK YOU…
    love always….

  25. avatar
    Kohl Ette | 7 September 2013 at 6:52 pm #

    MEMO:
    Mon dream
    Mondrian
    No need for dew to
    tell me to dream on
    honey cream
    that’s all I can think of tonight and all
    I have to say today
    tho it’s thurs
    feels like mon…

    Yours Minakohletta

  26. avatar
    Once | 8 September 2013 at 5:54 am #

    Came across this passage in a book I read yesterday, reminded me of this blog post. It refers to literature, specifically, but I believe it to be true of all art:

    “Just because a readership wants a certain kind of literature doesn’t mean it’s a literature that should be written – a literature that LITERATURE wants, so to speak. The reader model assumes the reader knows what’s best. But this just encourages fad chasing. And it reinforces existing tastes, which in turn ensures the same kinds of stories get written over and over. Readers can’t be trusted with that kind of responsibility. ” – Christopher Hacker, “The Morels”.

  27. avatar
    rev | 8 September 2013 at 3:53 pm #

    Just received “Uncollected” today – what a gem for dipping into and getting a grip of when time allows!…. Great quote from Philip Pullman (author of His Dark Materials Trilogy)on radio today…..”writing is a totalitarian process….reading is democratic”

  28. avatar
    Anonymous | 9 September 2013 at 10:39 pm #

    Dude, did Marc Geiger ever gush to you about Jane’s Addiction when he hooked up as their booking agent?

  29. avatar
    Polaris | 10 September 2013 at 3:40 pm #

    Freedom of choice – is what we’ve got.
    I’ve been accused of being combative.
    No…I just stand up for what I believe in.
    And partial boredom, I guess, at times – just for amusement – to stir the pot, a little.

  30. avatar
    Kohl Ette | 10 September 2013 at 7:31 pm #

    ‘Put up your doots and let’s get down to it…’ Joking. Do you want a poem for peace? I wrote it on Saturday night and thought it was a bit humdrum. I don’t know but at the moment, I’m studying/teaching a bit of history which isn’t even my subject and reading about war is making me a bit depressed, so when I re read this pome, I thought maybe it serves a function after all?
    SATURDAY NIGHT:
    I think I have to try and be nice
    I apologised to a boy for annoying
    although he didn’t concede he may
    have annoyed me
    I try to be nice to a man
    who is more forgiving
    and seems better for the weekend
    and some scolding
    oh he’s going deaf too
    the story of my life
    perhaps we both are
    how convenient
    I dreamed I was in London
    with my children and it was happy
    I was showing them a train line
    which went to lots of interesting spots
    except we were just leaving
    to go to the airport
    so I said we’ll go to Harrods and Mme
    Waxworks next time
    but it was still happy because it felt
    like there really would be a next time
    tho really I can’t promise anything
    I think of next week
    I think of selfish
    and not so selfish desires
    and sigh.

  31. avatar
    Anonymous | 11 September 2013 at 4:27 am #

    Steve, is it true that Donnette Thayer is an admin support secretary at the University of Alberta? Fucked-up world where a voice like that ends up in admin, eh?

    • avatar
      caitbrid | 13 September 2013 at 1:35 pm #

      I haven’t been on here in a while and I’ve missed it!! Just realized that it’s your birthday SK so did not want to let it pass, so, Happy Birthday!!!

      Kathleen in Philly

  32. avatar
    Anonymous | 12 September 2013 at 8:44 am #

    it’s been a lovely time reading the time being and though disappointed you’re ending for now during music month… with your current schedule seems like no other way around it…(my favorite groupings of reader comments to your blog entries have been Septembers’ by the way; so many subjects within have just amazed me)… it will be fun when sometime checking in the future, there will be the time again… observations of a genius to read.

    until, as it is music month – here’s a picture to leave with: [while] driving through some state with crimson soil a few days ago (the most beautiful red! – hadn’t been through that state for awhile) listening to the radio – they don’t put cd players in rental trucks… one of many funny memories recalled: it was ACDC’s thunderstruck playing: and there as I was listening came into view: thousands of stoner teenage boys; escaping a night from their parents’ beratings and/or hiding in their rooms; instead, at a concert in a night of power and sheer freedom from their own little worlds – all together, banging along to the power of a goofy song – cracked me up but also made me hope they’re all okay and have resolved to go forward. come on, you have to hope that for everyone – and pray their memories are happy ones when they look back; and as you’re listening, you realize it was their fathers’ who lead them there with intended fondness from their own coming of age to Chuck Berry’s same rendition of life that accidentally made them berate their own sons… unaware – and that is what ACDC was brilliant for: allowing freedom to those who couldn’t break free (at the time); and that is life it seems for the masses – and when you look back in retrospect to ACDC, even though personally, can’t say I like them, they brought the masses (along with a ton of other same-type bands, but I think they were the biggest of…) something to feel when that was all they could handle to understand. anyway, it cracked me up – the memory – and I didn’t dislike the song as much when I thought of the reason… just kind of sweet…

    unless able to look further; and it’s good you always do look further, yourself, to life and places somewhere else, there was a purpose for that stuff too –

    best wishes with all of your wonderful events coming up. you will make many many people happy. (and then it’s Christmas!)

  33. avatar
    isolde | 12 September 2013 at 9:47 am #

    alexander was a great bloke, but is the sword mightier than the pen? he would have done well to put the knot before the cart, use its many strandedness, its tension and its flexibility, tie it one way in the north, another way in the south, this way in the east, that way in the west

  34. avatar
    Anonymous | 13 September 2013 at 3:35 am #

    Not going to be here tomorrow, so happy birthday from me, Killa!

  35. avatar
    Kohl Ette | 13 September 2013 at 10:16 am #

    More birthday wishes! Do you like the dvd dd made – Ramble I might suggest in particular?! He didn’t use many of the images I actually sent him that I can see but has handpicked from my albums. Well I love the selection… I think the resulting fx are vvery sweet and a little tart too (at the end), do you? Have a wonderful day if you may x

  36. avatar
    Lady Di | 13 September 2013 at 1:08 pm #

    What, no birthday post? I hope that means you’re having too much fun celebrating.
    Wishing you a very happy birthday sk. Have an enjoyable relaxing day and get spoilt rotten.

    Love and very best wishes
    Di

  37. avatar
    k.p.buk | 13 September 2013 at 1:20 pm #

    this and every
    dream
    has been of you

    they ask if we
    were lovers
    and

    this i never knew

    these things
    go on
    so long ago

    and

    just a day or two
    was it I
    or

    was it you
    who knows
    every

    dream i dream
    is
    always of you

    always
    of
    you…

    always of
    you…

  38. avatar
    Anonymous | 13 September 2013 at 2:49 pm #

    Happy Birthday sk,

    Hope you’re enjoying today and have been spoilt, u deserve to be.

    Peace & love
    Therese

  39. avatar
    Ingrid | 13 September 2013 at 7:46 pm #

    Wishing you a very Happy Birthday and many Happy Returns of the Day.

    xxx

  40. avatar
    Gรผnter | 13 September 2013 at 10:01 pm #

    Happy Birthday Steve!
    Have a nice time.

    Bests
    Take Care

    Gรผnter

  41. avatar
    kell | 14 September 2013 at 11:07 am #

    Steve, Happy Birthday for Friday. Cheers, Kellie ~

  42. avatar
    Kohl Ette | 14 September 2013 at 7:22 pm #

    w/is one hallucinating?

  43. avatar
    rockstar again and again | 14 September 2013 at 11:11 pm #

    happy b day

  44. avatar
    Roshni | 11 October 2013 at 8:27 pm #

    This is the first year I totally forgot to wish you Happy Birthday…
    I was thinking it…
    I was doing my own thing..dealing with the new year I had just entered the day before…
    I don’t go out much and I don’t have regular friends,but I have my family who I live with…
    I cannot deal with conflict and not beat myself up for hours after…
    I know, I should try harder
    But the music calls me to the canvas and the clay wants to be caressed into forms..
    And I don’t know exactly were it will lead but it brings me joy
    And maybe one day it will matter to others and give them pleasure also
    But that’s not the purpose of the process…
    It just has to be done…
    Or I may as well not be here..
    Because I will never smile with love

    Take care Steve


Leave a Reply

You must be logged in to post a comment.