posted on September 19, 2010 at 9:40 am

electrical disturbance

oh yeah music

that stuff

apprehended with the organs of hearing

music is an arrangement of sounds creating certain feelings

music while you being born

music while you being fucked

music while you being buried

gimme that strange feeling

i’m sitting in the wings waiting to go on

its some inevitable club somewhere

are you nervous ? some chick asks

yeah i am i say

music expected of me

my fingers my throat

my mind dreampt it up

my bass sounds huge

i pump an open A

i lock in with the kick drum the bass drum

its too easy

we sound like a machine

we spread out over the terrain

we crush resistance

we roller over the crowd

i look at the faces in the crowd

people are mouthing my words

people push against each other

people looking faint

people looking all excitable

the music in your blood pounding

the beat of windscreen wipers in the steady rain

the moaning of some woman downstairs

the throb of the machinery

those romantic castanets in spanish harlem

on a warm spring day when zephyrs play

my ears ring the air sings

i drew kohl under my eyes

i looked girlish and wasted under the dizzy white lights

smoking mirrors

my sister appears from universe #323

looks like one of my daughters

i look past my eyes into my soul

past my soul into my vegetal spirit

past my spirit into my ……

there are no words for this

the music is insistent

the guitars lash out cut off peoples head

the cymbals shriek above the din

the bass hurts under the racket

i feel a hundred feet tall

i direct clusters of notes like a barrage of fire

boom boom boom

my heart keeps pumping

my veins swallow the beat

a surge of crimson ultrasound

a delicate silver thread

the organs gulp and squeeze

feet tap

hands clap

i think about everything

yeah everything

thats my sorrow

thats my saving grace

thats my defining moment

the ancient world

drugs and sex

first world war

donnette singing hex in 1988

nineveh i want to hold you

karin in sweden the night we first met

we knew at that moment we would have children together

at a nico concert in stockholm

the norse gods

the greek gods

rosie n claudio in canberra

my dad les fiddling around with his morris major

my mum joycie cooking me egg n chips

my brother russell who i loved n bullied relentlessly

jennifer and her south melbourne flat

reading the early morning news while i watched her from her bed

god she was a lovely girl

mwp his first gig with the church

eyes down n looking

tim powles n i finally become best mates after years of frostiness

peter k always the consummate musician but a tricky character

richard ploog hugging a fucking tree up the north coast

getting stuck backstage with some boring dickhead rambling on

interviews with stupid geezas who didnt do their homework

meeting iggy pop ….what a nice cat!

seeing t rex at hordern pavilion with paul c…they sucked

seeing japan in london in 1978 at the music machine ..they were great

getting the cane at school ….it hurt like all fuck

getting my teac 4 track home for the first time

the smell of the plastic that it was wrapped in

the night my dad died i was playing a gig

the day john lennon died

standing there on the phone..WHAT? OH NO!!

my first car a little blue mazda with column shift

the birth of my children …all caesarean….

five daughters

five beautiful incredible girls

hearing bowie for the first time

he immediately superseded bolan, didnt he?

marc had lost it but david was moving upwards n onwards

my sister from universe #323 with her  egyptian magic

margot making up songs on the spot

grant walking round in albion street strumming his guitar

my cat timmy who got run over n me n my mother wept n wept

my house in rivett when i had no friends

my house in rozelle when i had a hundred friends

yeah mansfield st painted black n red inside

with the tree wallpaper n the skylights

with the mosquitoes in the back garden n spiders in the basement

with the eight track tape machine and the guitars all lined up

my name in the papers

my face on the tv

my voice on the radio

my flights to europe n america

airports cups of coffee driving on the autobahn

spain italy portugal

the women all dusky and voluptuous

first time in amsterdam …..a blurry memory

rock festivals meeting michael hutchence who was angry with me

meeting andrew eldritch

meeting richard strange

meeting ian mc cullough who was a real tool

lyneham high how i still miss those corridors where i was formed

playing whist at lunchtime in the quadrangle

listening to other kids records in the common room

my first cigarette my first real kiss

my first girlfriend

my last day as a child

dad takes us on holiday

me n dad sit up front n talk about the music on the radio

australia whizzes by outside

here a bridge there a river here a house now gone forever

meeting thee mr ricky when he was still a kid

fuck what an incredible musician that kid turned into

we still havent got that david neil album out have we?

yeah

my memories my music

writing all those words pouring out of me

the night is very soft

it doesnt change

goliath

autumn soon

swan lake

i cant keep track of them all

did i really write all that stuff

did i really know all those girls

did i really play all them gigs

did i really fly to all them cities

did i really spend all that time in recording studios

late at night singing in a deserted booth

singing all those bloody words

all those bloody words about what…..?

about all n nothing

about everything and all that

the history of me n you n the whole damn shebang

everything

thats a lot of stuff

yeah

in spades for sure

31 Responses to “muse sick”

  1. avatar
    eekie | 19 September 2010 at 10:29 am #

    “lyneham high how i still miss those corridors where i was formed”
    ~
    Really? Huh. I wouldn’t have guessed that.

  2. avatar
    princey | 19 September 2010 at 10:39 am #

    Wow, that’s an incredible life you’ve had there sk, shit, I feel like I’ve done nothing in my 44 years here on earth compared to you.
    .
    Keep on, keeping on sk and thanks for all the magical music and words 🙂
    love Amanda
    P.S. Yeah, what’s happened to that “David Neil” album, ya slackers!!!

  3. avatar
    Richard | 19 September 2010 at 11:43 am #

    funny you mention Ploog and Autumn Soon
    it came on in my car yesterday and I remembered how much I like the drumming in the outro

  4. avatar
    Once | 19 September 2010 at 12:24 pm #

    I have NEVER read ANYTHING this utterly perfect – and visceral – EVER.

    I can almost feel your mind in this, or at least the part you let me see.

    I met you once. I shook your hand. I said, “I hate being a fan”. I was drunk. I didn’t know what I meant.

    I do now. Envy has no place here (Why have heroes when you want their glories? MWP). Sad drunk American girls get caught by envy; the lucky ones grow into people. And as a person – I feel RESPECT.

    You went thru it all, and here you are – and the greatest miracle is that you STILL share it with US. (The great unwashed public – the ones who may “get it” or may not…you are not afraid.)

    Thank you so much, Steve.

    Salute.

  5. avatar
    celticat | 19 September 2010 at 12:51 pm #

    Great read on a sunny spring morning in West Oz. Hoping to catch up with thee mr for a coffee and chat. Love to the fambley 🙂

  6. avatar
    Name | 19 September 2010 at 1:34 pm #

    Who uses the word Shebang and how often? I mean except cockney rebels, I don’t see it used very often anymore… nice word. I was editing something for something else written yesterday earlier today and added that to it’s end. Now, I have to find another word. I was not even thinking about anyone else or Harley when I used it; now I am.

    along with you and Church bandmates(and Ian McC — seriously, anyone who can poetically insert the word saccharin into a song among all his other beautiful bunnywords is also a genius and nock-nock jokes..oh! and he and Will Sergeant…) in thought — you are one of the few machines of music together or apart — that always surrounds in awe, there is another (playing with another Ian), but he had to go:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AINpizQVEts&feature=related

    Doesn’t everybody wish he was still here?

  7. avatar
    Name | 19 September 2010 at 1:56 pm #

    ps — I have CR cd on now — I was staying in to work; now I am listening to music; not working.

  8. avatar
    Tanya | 19 September 2010 at 2:10 pm #

    Impressive & awesome assessment & retrospective. What a life! I guess in some ways, we are living it vicariously through you. Long live music, largely attributed to a band I discovered many years ago called The Church (memories of incense & Heyday…I digress with fondness) yes and Bowie, Lennon…his passing too sad for words. I would be dead without music – it helps me laugh, cry, think, not think, escape, dance, breath, feel. Yeah, The Church is a part of my retrospective… finding a common interest with my kiwi boyfriend so many years ago.

  9. avatar
    Freddie | 19 September 2010 at 2:26 pm #

    Once again, it is a treat to read.

    Dammit! Why isn’t anyone geting photos from your musical?!!! :^(

  10. avatar
    Shoffy | 19 September 2010 at 3:13 pm #

    I bet you had a lot of good times Steve and some not so good, its good to look back but even better to look forward, as long as the Time Being exists we are here reading all n nothing n everything and all that with you. Great blog again, Shoffy

  11. avatar
    Steven Krut | 19 September 2010 at 3:57 pm #

    You met Iggy Pop? He’s also in my pantheon of heroes. Wish he’d start wearing a shirt, though.

  12. avatar
    Jasperina | 19 September 2010 at 4:02 pm #

    You create a rich and colourful tapestry with your words. Melancholy and sweet. The more I read the more yearning I felt for my own past lives. Got dressed up in a mauve polka dot dress, pink cardigan with baubles and red shoes today. A dull kinda day in Sydney where you gotta create the colour yourself.

  13. avatar
    Jonny Hollywood | 19 September 2010 at 4:36 pm #

    you wrote words bout everything nothing and this bloody wanker…

  14. avatar
    Name | 19 September 2010 at 4:47 pm #

    no work done… I won’t do it again (post a bunch of links), promise – but after listening to a cd looked up stuff on that youtube thing – if anyone has the time, maybe just one — they are so adorable and it’s music… made me smile…

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pkdHVZxy9HI&feature=related

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xZN87RO1uiE&feature=related

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P6fJtLr2GLU

    and last, sending to elvis if he’s out there…

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wvarPF5zlUA&a=GxdCwVVULXe_rSsPgWPLEr1giEpprjE8&list=ML&playnext=1

  15. avatar
    Therese | 19 September 2010 at 5:07 pm #

    What a life you’ve had sk. What memories, you’re lucky that you can remember all those important stages in your life and the countless number of people you’ve met. Wonder what you did to Michael H to make him angry. Glad you and TP get on well now, it could have had dire consequences for the band. At the club this week heard UTMW (background pokie music) a version I hadn’t heard before by a guy with a country twist to it, didn’t like it, but hope you got the royalties from it.
    Have a good week and hope there’s news about a Sydley music gig soon, we’ve certainly been waiting a long time. Do good things come to those who wait?
    We’ll have to c.

    Peace & love
    Therese

  16. avatar
    Martha | 19 September 2010 at 5:38 pm #

    The Night Is Very Soft – ahhh. When I tell you I dig that song, believe that and no less. Needle in the groove, floating there as the music flows from my speakers. So glad I got to see it performed live, because I never thought that I would. Thanks for that…

    My family had a Timmy cat, too. He disappeared one day and we looked and we looked. I remember my mom sitting in the living room crying. I remember looking under the oil tank in the basement of our house. I was three years old. We never found him.

  17. avatar
    cazziem | 19 September 2010 at 6:03 pm #

    Fantastic read SK. I guess each and every one of us has memories that spring to mind when we hear certain pieces of music, some good, some not so good. Im seem to hear music everywhere, in the rhythm of the rain, my car engine, travelling on a train, but as the saying goes, “if music be the food of love, play on!”

  18. avatar
    hellbound heart | 19 September 2010 at 7:24 pm #

    tell ya what, nothing quite like holidays with your fambily when you’re a kid, ay….

    love always……

  19. avatar
    Name | 19 September 2010 at 7:47 pm #

    I’ve only accomplished 12 pages this month and for that I had to go to the high desert for a week w/out internet/just pad, typewriter and tape recorder… but I also too got to watch camels and ostriches being raced by Jockeys – pretty wild!

    thank you for always writing everything so new and interesting to read and think about. i truly hope you will always receive unweathered ideas and wonderful energy back into your own way through this world — enough to come close to all that you send out to so many. in my view of the world, the ones who offer up and give truth, fun and thought back equally are those that bring the most to others’ lives. no compete, no all’s on you, no tarnish — just shared stories and original thoughts drifting into everyone. i was at a wall, and you’ve made me think both ahead and back to so many things spoken and shared (and a few taken) – vivid. not a drab particle in your mind – i was never bored, which some would say is a miracle… blah, blah, blah.

    i tried and did get through many of your previous blogs – there’s a bunch! was looking for something you already thought of but i couldn’t find, which doesn’t mean it isn’t there, just i didn’t have time… anyway: naïve and a goofy restatement of something past perhaps – but: by definition, perfection is a finite value and therefore, is [only] an end… so, is it not then: that our imperfections of this time and what follows always thereafter, are the only way to infinity? i don’t know. i wish i could come back just one more time and peek, and there would be the thought to take me to that answer. yeah.

    to get busy/concentrate more (ouch) on something being slowly put together (again) means will miss idle time that has been spent reading your thoughts with new wonder. what a gift it has been. now must focus forward towards the finish… after, i can come back and wander in your writings again… or, if you would: that next album soon, so i can buy for someone else and be delighted when it’s copied for me – then, i get it too (without liner notes, song titles, or etc – just listen – i think more beautiful that way, like a dream).

    – just a thought: i think your mind travels way too fast to stop on ego. so those few comments must have been from friends just joking with you… or from someone else who’s just stupid. you really are very special.

    — so tempting to purchase this one orig painting I love… I want it… i hate (!!!!) paypal – when amex calls to ask if I purchased/shipped 15 computers to some country i’ve never heard of, i am paranoid and know it is because i used that silly system on the internet to make a purchase. I don’t remember her name or contact, but there was someone on that link who said she might be able to help with arrangements of a purchase; if that can be other than paypal (direct credit card is fine or some other payment unsure…), please have her email me if that is okay.

    Way too many coincidences — I know we’re all connected, but lately when I’ve been writing my own stuff, and get bored/need a break/come to TB, I’m reading what I just wrote (different format/storyline) but same emotions almost verbatim and it’s not anything previously read, it is your new blogs… scarey in a way. I don’t know what to do.

    (…it was not CR – I read the album sleeve after listening this time, and remembered — see I couldn’t have been thinking about him at time I used the word — it wasn’t his; but keep Ronno on the post if you can; it’s so pretty (and it is “music month” – he should be treasured.)

    thank you.

  20. avatar
    davem | 19 September 2010 at 9:12 pm #

    Aaahhh…Destination.
    Great stuff.
    x

  21. avatar
    jcole | 20 September 2010 at 12:42 am #

    So good. Thanks.

  22. avatar
    Brien Comerford | 20 September 2010 at 2:06 am #

    Very interesting blog and perspective. Thank u SK!!

  23. avatar
    knot | 20 September 2010 at 2:48 am #

    nehes nehes nehes
    nehes em hotep

    love from universe 323

  24. avatar
    f1girl | 20 September 2010 at 6:31 am #

    My favourite so far….

  25. avatar
    BROKEN TOYS AND HEROS | 20 September 2010 at 11:23 pm #

    A lot of solid memories scattered thru time. With all this recollection coming to the surface, you must be preparing ur self for the next chapter in ur life, unknowingly. Be well my far away friend.

    AsAlways,
    BrokenToysAndHeros

  26. avatar
    andy | 22 September 2010 at 8:06 am #

    wow….never would have guessed you ‘n timbo had a cool start.

  27. avatar
    thebloggedcrusade | 27 September 2010 at 4:29 pm #

    meeting steve kilbey.he was an uphimself asshole.

  28. avatar
    Peter D | 10 March 2014 at 2:34 pm #

    Why was Michael Hutchence angry with you, Steve? You don’t seem to have mentioned it anywhere else.

    And also, while I’m asking the questions, my sister and I are going to Amsterdam in September for her to attend an infant mortality conference, and to make the trip worthwhile we need to come up with a few other places to visit. No particular city is calling out to me so far, so I’m trying to hone in on somewhere scenic and sparsely populated, on account of the fact that I don’t like the crowds. Do you have any recommendations at all?

    • avatar
      thetimebeing | 10 March 2014 at 3:56 pm #

      read my memoirs. it will be revealed
      i always recommend sweden

      • avatar
        Peter D | 10 March 2014 at 9:27 pm #

        Thanks Steve, I hadn’t considered Sweden. And it seems pretty silly that I even asked you that question, now that I think about it. I shall explore the possibility.

        Can’t wait for your memoirs (I’ve learned how to spell ‘memoirs’ today). It’ll be like Barry Humphries meets rock’n’roll, minus the booze, or something. (BH was the last auto-bio I read, quite a few years ago now. It’s a pity there’s no place for a Les Patterson today, I say. He could speak a lot of much needed truth, he could.)


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