posted on February 18, 2008 at 12:32 am

my wardrobe is concealing things from me
my slippers are slipping
my carpets low self opinion
my fridge is cold towards me
my fans just wanna blow
my mirror comes up with nothing original
my windows unopeness
my music all unheard
my paintings lost somewhere
my kids acting like children
my wife behaves unmanly
my mother no fraternal feelings for me
my brothers never in the sisterhood
my father waiting waiting patiently
my work is play
my words are just words
my sing-speak voice no choice eh joyce?
my relatives no relationship
my friends who needs enemies
my enemies cant be bothered
my festival the moons birthday
my sex sometimes it owns just random gender
my goodness ha ha ha
my garden…..tar and cement
my weight worth itself in fools gold
my teeth and it was all yellow
my eyes grey brigade
my nose red and straighter than “straight”
my mouth like a rivers
my beard of neutron stars
my jawline like a clean sweep
my neck swan rake
my hair wispy whispery and soft
my brain insane in the men-brane
my mind unwinding not minding
my money shot
my clock feels temporary
my time is at least 3 quarters gone
my ears hear ringing humming screaming
my legs were made for walking
my soles mates
my feet not centimetres
my calves bulge like guppies eyes
my knees crack and buckle
my thighs ironed out
my groin groin grone
my loins lions loins sir
my belly abdominable snowman
my chest sunken in the sea
my armless harms
my handy hands, duane
my fingers which keep touching things
my nails are nihilistic
my freckles oh how i used to hate em
my wrinkles olde man look at my life
my chances slim, slim
my hopes hopeless
my dreams zzzzzz
my my
my
*

24 Responses to “my car has abandonment issues”

  1. avatar
    veleska1970 | 18 February 2008 at 1:57 am #

    my oh my!!! are you the sum of all these parts? i don’t think so. there is so much more to you.

    enjoy your day, steve.

    lotza love…..

  2. avatar
    Anonymous | 18 February 2008 at 1:59 am #

    Slipping slippers, eh? I know the feeling. Mine slipped under the bed about seven and a half years ago and I’ve been confused ever since.

  3. avatar
    linjo | 18 February 2008 at 2:29 am #

    The rabbit has chewed the shit out of my carpet, the mechanic just rang, $500 more than expected, I met a handsome guy with liquid brown eyes, now discovered he has serious alcohol problem, my brother is soon to inherit $3 million (his wife is rather) dynamics have changed and he is more miserable than ever and the list goes on.
    Thats life innit?
    Hope the winds of change blow your way soon Steve.
    Linda

  4. avatar
    princey | 18 February 2008 at 2:33 am #

    What’s the matter sk, you’re starting to make me worry about you like an old mother hen! (well I just dropped off my little boy at kinder crying and clinging on to me, so I’m totally in that frame of mind at the moment!)
    Talk to me sk, I’m a good listener and a good shoulder to cry on, especially for you (but maybe I’ve got it wrong).
    Are you ok?
    Take care and love always,
    Amanda

  5. avatar
    Anonymous | 18 February 2008 at 2:40 am #

    hilarious!

  6. avatar
    Anonymous | 18 February 2008 at 3:35 am #

    Did someone leave your cake out in the rain?

    Lady Di

  7. avatar
    Anonymous | 18 February 2008 at 3:52 am #

    Steve, this should cheer you up…
    a news report on the world’s First Vegan Strip Club…

    http://www.vagabondish.com/casa-diablo-vegan-strip-club-portland-oregon/

  8. avatar
    Ethereal Butterfly | 18 February 2008 at 3:59 am #

    Nah – I disagree with you Princey , I think this is SK in a whimsical frame of never-mind…….. lyrical & nonsensical, ………ever heard a butterfly giggle? ( more like a witch’s cackle actually).

    I’m keeping my antenna xed for the paintings…….
    Heather

  9. avatar
    Kurtez | 18 February 2008 at 5:27 am #

    I was just gonna sign up to pay you $100 per month but me and the wife just left each other (explain that to boys aged 4, 6 and 7) so now I’m gonna pay you $200 per month and claim hardship. Really though, the only thing that keeps me going is reading some quote from you in 1996 about walking on the seashore in the rain and your girlfriend just left you and the world’s ending and you’re sad as can be but somehow things are good and it’s happy in some backward, dark kind of way. Your cheque’s in the mail.

  10. avatar
    princey | 18 February 2008 at 6:09 am #

    I don’t know if I agree EB, there’s something obviously worrying sk, he’s written so many blogs like this, I’m worried about him 🙁
    Luv Amanda

  11. avatar
    Ethereal Butterfly | 18 February 2008 at 7:16 am #

    ‘Life is difficult’ ( M Scott-Peck, The Road Less Travelled, 1978, pg 13, the opening sentence of his top selling book. )
    If we can detach from the mundane frustrations & not be overwhelmed by them, give them a scale of 1-10 of degrees of worth- really -worrying -about, then make jokes about them, then I think we are doing something akin to what the yogis call; Pratyahara – detachment from worldly activities, a non- attached attitude in our body & mind. Buddhists and Semites practice detachment from life’s experiences through humour but with a focus on compassion. The Jews were making light of their experiences in the gas chambers during the holocaust right up until it was their own turn to go, as depicted in the European film, ‘Life is Beautiful’ where the father was taken off to the gas chamber & did a silly walk to pass on this attitude to life to his young son who was watching him go. If SK is able to make lyrical fun of the mundane frustrations of life then his yoga practise may be contributing to his present sense of Pratyahara ….. then again I could be way off the mark, what do I know i’m just a beach butterfly? I’m switching flowers now…………….

  12. avatar
    ...being here, doing this... | 18 February 2008 at 7:22 am #

    my my
    my
    *

    sharona?

  13. avatar
    linjo | 18 February 2008 at 8:14 am #

    Celestial wisdom with wings X

  14. avatar
    davem | 18 February 2008 at 9:06 am #

    Oh Slim. We love you!!
    xx

  15. avatar
    Hellbound Heart | 18 February 2008 at 10:26 am #

    oh deary who’s had their parade rained upon…it’s rained so much up here in murwillumbah that i’ve got mould growing on the walls and water marks on the bedroom ceiling from a leaking roof (my other half is trying to convince me that those are from the times that he’s gone off like a firecracker…yeah, right)
    love always…

  16. avatar
    isolde | 18 February 2008 at 11:50 am #

    my day job is playing havoc with my commenting time

  17. avatar
    eek | 18 February 2008 at 12:15 pm #

    Amanda, I know what’s worrying SK. He’s thinking “oh dear, I’ve been spending far too much time in Melbourne lately. I really to need to go to Columbus, Ohio for a couple of months and do solo shows every night in the north campus area. I have been completely neglecting my utterly fantastic Columbus fans and it’s just eating away at my very soul.”

    Yep. That’s it.

    🙂

  18. avatar
    Anonymous | 18 February 2008 at 3:13 pm #

    so the paintings havent found yet. let’s wait patiently, … and pray. please do inform us as soon as the paintings has been found. I still believe they will turn up, and they MUST!

    when writing this, i’m starting to get very irratated because of the f**cking bastards of fedex. I’ll never use their service and i’ll tell everyone i know dont use it if the paintings are not found.

  19. avatar
    Thomas Thomsen, Denmark | 18 February 2008 at 5:00 pm #

    You want some wonderful, new music while waiting for Painkiller?

    Buy Shelter From The Ash by Six Organs Of Admittance. Thank god Steve and his compadres aren’t the only ones making poetic music.

  20. avatar
    Brien Comerford | 18 February 2008 at 5:44 pm #

    The Humane Society of the United States exposed egregiously cruel and inhumane mistreatment of cows at a California slaughterhouse that has now led to the largest beef recall in history. Sadistic bastards brutalizing crippled bovines.

    Thanks for being a humane, animal loving vegetarian since 1972 Mr. Steve KIlbey. U R a bona fide visionary and a mystical and benign oracle.

  21. avatar
    heather | 18 February 2008 at 10:14 pm #

    bah! who wants to go to work when the waterworld monsoon is outside yon door….
    would this account for the dream I just woke up from, of whales, breathing close…

    a corker Killer! beautifully crafted…come to Darwin with MD and make a dvd of readings in the rain!

    xxKittykat

  22. avatar
    Anonymous | 18 February 2008 at 11:05 pm #

    morning?

  23. avatar
    matthew | 19 February 2008 at 1:25 am #

    A brief lull within the Department Of Secrecy… I read blog and laugh audibly, which is forbidden here… I may yet start a revolution…. brilliant stuff SK.

  24. avatar
    CSTCoach | 19 February 2008 at 3:04 pm #

    ahh, a bouquet of puns and double meanings. well played.


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