posted on July 12, 2008 at 11:03 pm

well that bloody well does it, i’m afraid
my mum cant come down n see us cos of the pope
the bloody pope?
he’s in sydney for world “youth” day
do “youth” need a day
isnt youth its own bloody reward
why not old slightly deaf codgers day
or middle aged women who never got married day
or people who are bad at maths day
or people who hate broccoli day
get the picture…
quite frankly…..youth…..they got it good
why should they have a bloody day
its sunday ….aint it enough…?
dont give em a day
no one asked me….bloody youth….
oh heres your day
and all us older non youths or children not yet youths
will bow and supplicate and anoint your athletic feet with oil
oh youth hurrah! hurrah!
look i thought youth had it good already
you know no arthritis or gout or all the rest
the fountain of youth…yes please…i wanna be young again
leave my old brain in…but change the rest
erase these wrinkles
whiten these old teeth
straighten my aging bones
thicken my hair
steady my gaze
strengthen my limbs
etc etc etc
i wont need a day …will i….?
but you know what they say
youth is wasted on the young
and thats because
you wont know how great it is being young
until i all starts to end
thats right
all those gorgeous perfect youths gonna end up olde
and thats a trip in itself and its a lesson to learn
my old man said to me
you arrogant little sod…you think yer gonna be 18 forever…?!
and i, in my igno and arro gance
i said yes…i’ll never be olde like you are
oh yes i thought i would find a way to stop the grey
oh ha ha
pity dad aint around to laugh at me now
another olde guy courtesy of olde father time
now im not complaining
im nearly fifty four but it aint that bad
not as good as eighteen i s’pose
actually i can sing n play better
i can paint better
i’m much nicer to people…i can talk to em now
i can lurve much much better ..oh yes
i can swim better
i can do yoga better
i can do so much more
if you knew me at 18 you can still see its me
my hairs still the same colour
its getting thinner like my dads did
but its still brown …not white
you’d know me if ya saw me
oh no i’d love to be young again
young for fucking ever and ever
but getting wiser n wiser
ha ha
that is not this worlds design, fiendss
i’d like to tell ya that i stumbled on the fountain o’ youf
but alas i see in the mirror that it is not so
just lately i really looking my age
but thats as it should be
ive had those years
they cannot come back again
and mankinds attempts at eternal youth will always go wrong
witness botox and plazzy surgery…what a mess
i’d rather have my wrinkles and saggy bags
than some fucked up weird face thats scares children
like a lady in bondi we call botox meat
she looks like a bloody trout
just cos she wanted to look young
now she looks young…like a young salmon
all shiny and discoloured and stretched all out shape
nows shes bloody frightening…is that what she wanted
whats wrong with being whatever age you are
if youre a decent human with charm and grace
you can be 9 or 90 and its a pleasure to meet ya
i met gorgeous people and their beauty is a pain in the arse
elli n minna…you cant get younger or more beautiful than them
but dealing with em is ridiculous cos of their age
who cares about some anorexic bint dressed up in versace bollocks?
not me…..i take people as they come these days
and quite frankly i dont give a toss about yer “youth”
i aint bitter
i dont resent it
hey…we all get our time in the sun
and if you do yoga n dont eat dead stuff
you may look as good as me when yer this ancient
remember im 6 years off 60
but as for world youth day
bah humbug and piss off
as far as the pope..
now lets see
hes the incredibly wealthy nominal head
of a large secretive organization
who have over the years killed and tortured millions of people
thats right
from the people who brought you the witch trials
and the inquisition
and all kinds of wars and strife
ladies n gentleman
some olde geezer dressed up in a silly white costume
complete with the most awful hat you ever seen
(even i wouldnt look good in that)
some silly olde pontiff
thats clawed and bribed and threatened his way
to the top of a heap of child molesters and powerdrunk wankers
proclaiming himself infallible..(oh ha ha ha ha ha)
cranking out some dismal misinterpretation
of a book of dubious fables
his own organization helped to obfuscate at nicea ages ago
(put this in…take this out…get rid of this bit)
yep then they made themselves rich n powerful
playing on the suspicions n fears of us plebeians
all the while buggering little boys and poisoning each other
and selling dispensations
(eg baron boffly has murdered another man, cardinal..
yes…well that’ll cost him 2000 silver marks if he wants to get to heaven)
they repressed science
they repressed women
they meddled in politics
they were a useless pack of self serving fuckers
that ballsed up christs message of love
and were totally unable to live it
the pope… sydney….for youth…oh hardy ha ha
what has this crusty old bishop got for youth this time
make em feel guilty?
promise em some pie in the sky bullshit if they believe in yer nonsense ?
go on popey..tell em about all the wise- women in germany
your lot roasted alive cos they didnt conform to your superstitious jive
yes pope yer still the same olde crowd
with yer fucking opus dei and your big money deals
and attempts to get bigtime catholics in power like the old days
but oh dear
attendance is dropping off in the church
all churches (including mine, wise guy)
gee mr pope
what pathetic hogwash will you pull out to save your churchs career
cos quite frankly
they been saying its the end of the whole pope malarkey soon
and good riddance to a stupid idea
you aint the right hand man of god
youre just a silly old sod in a costume
and someones written a speech for ya
and theyve closed down half the roads in syddley
and my mum cant come down
so some outdated olde ponce can recruit some more youf
and quite frankly mr pope you can sod off to hell
or purgatory
or wherever
dont come back ‘ere!

42 Responses to “pope-eye the preacher man”

  1. avatar
    Anonymous | 13 July 2008 at 12:18 am #


  2. avatar
    Anonymous | 13 July 2008 at 12:32 am #

    no! no! much better to be pro-youth…

    ..they are the future
    teach them well…
    and let them lead the way..

  3. avatar
    steve kilbey | 13 July 2008 at 1:09 am #

    the childrens crusade…..?

  4. avatar
    Understandascope | 13 July 2008 at 1:13 am #

    couldn’t had said it better if I’d bothered to try
    From an ol geezerette

  5. avatar
    gazbosue | 13 July 2008 at 1:28 am #

    speaking of childrens crusade
    hillsong and their “jive for jesus”
    shtick makes the flesh creep.

  6. avatar
    triantelope | 13 July 2008 at 2:00 am #

    I wholeheartedly concur
    parasites and hypocrites, the lot of ’em

  7. avatar
    princey | 13 July 2008 at 2:08 am #

    I love your attitude towards ageing sk, “you’re as young as you feel” I agree baybee!!

    How can pope-eye afford to wear Versace shoes, while we plebs stuggle and suffer to make ends meet….what a joke!!!

    Well I hope u have a lovely, pope-propaganda-free day sk!
    Love Amanda

  8. avatar
    kat | 13 July 2008 at 2:20 am #


    pope situ aside, hope you get to see your mom soon. that’s important..

  9. avatar
    Damien | 13 July 2008 at 3:38 am #

    I’ve always felt there was something sinister about Christian “yoof”.

  10. avatar
    Brien Comerford | 13 July 2008 at 4:10 am #

    Another great blog SK. I do admire some Christian laeders including John Wesley, William Booth, Ellen G. White, Cesar Chavez, Martin De Porres and Basil The Great. Other inspiring figures are Gandhi, Vishnu, Isaiah, Abdul Kalam and when he’s on topic, Steven John Kilbey.

  11. avatar
    Anonymous | 13 July 2008 at 5:01 am #

    If we didnt age all those priest would blend right in with thier rape victims.

  12. avatar
    lily was here | 13 July 2008 at 5:41 am #

    This will make you laugh.

    Yesterday arvo I was talking to a friend of mine over the phone who is down near Sydney having cancer treatment, almost halfway through it now. I asked him how he’s handling the chemo. Well, he started laughing really loud and said “well, Im handling that REALLY well BUT I never want to see another bloody catholic ever again”. Now he’s got character, same age as you, and the best sense of humour. God bless him 🙂


  13. avatar
    golden thorn in my paw | 13 July 2008 at 7:23 am #

    I 2 have very little time for organised religion, the kingdom of heaven is within. love to all my brothers and sisters. no more oligarchy, may we all be safe and free from harm, and reaching for the stars.

  14. avatar
    rubikon | 13 July 2008 at 7:30 am #

    Religion is greying at the temples..

  15. avatar
    Anonymous | 13 July 2008 at 8:29 am #

    Well, this pope has some knowledge of social activities for the young since he was in the Hitler Youth himself. Nice to know Gods innfallible right-hand has sworn allegiance to the Führer.

  16. avatar
    fantasticandy | 13 July 2008 at 9:26 am #

    your’e very adept at articulating our own feelings for us.
    surely this would be a better world
    if all thinking people felt the same way?
    a double-rant episode!
    andy L.

  17. avatar
    Melby Symon | 13 July 2008 at 10:40 am #

    With age…comes true beauty. As I get older…the more I realise that true beauty is not just about appearance…it is all about grace, self confidence and respect.

    As far as having a flawed human being (aren’t we all…but I’m not trying to be the pope !) as some sort of deity to be worshipped…I never could work that one out.

  18. avatar
    ross b | 13 July 2008 at 11:27 am #

    Very very well said sk, could not agree more.

    i actually live and toil right in the centre of where this crazy circus is about to descend and some of my plans have had to fall aside…i usually don’t mind plans falling through due to unforeseen circumstances or cataclysmic events etc but because of this unbelievable (and utterly useless) holy bullshit that is coming to overload our streets & senses it is annoying me somewhat !

    i’d rather listen to the Church than go kneel in one

    the birds the trees the sky etal etal – ‘god’ is there, and not in the spectacle of some silly fuckwit with all the robes and chains and stick and whatnot…

    blah blah…
    Love & Life, r.

  19. avatar
    Hellbound Heart | 13 July 2008 at 11:39 am #

    …well, what a mixed bag this week, went away to sponge off my oldies for a few days (not really)…as for the pope and his entourage, they do nothing for me, dislike organised religion…the marketing hype is disgusting, you’ve got the t-shirts, silver-plate spoons, plastic boxing kangaroos, postcards and other assorted crap so that followers can be ripped off and screwed just that little bit more…
    as for ageing, do it with as much grace and dignity as possible, i say…
    love always…

  20. avatar
    Anonymous | 13 July 2008 at 12:23 pm #

    Would you say the same if it were the anglicans having a big gig? or the muslims? or the buddhists?

    Try and be a bit respectful of other ppls beliefs….you may consider catholicism to be not your bag but it’s this type of rhetoric that kicked off a whole helluva lot of anguish in the 40’s. There’s a lot of jews who remember iron-fisted institutionalised supression….but we are supposed to be beyond that and all should be able to practice their beliefs without fear of recrimination or reprise….just not in Kilbeyville I suppose.

    You preach tolerance but have none…why does this not surprise as Kilbey only worships at the church of self-interest.

    come after me now, all you who sit at your puters nodding as you read his missives without pausing to THINK.


  21. avatar
    catholic girl | 13 July 2008 at 12:39 pm #

    Oh comeon 10:23, yes he would. All topics are fairgame here. This is a light-hearted laugh. Dont take it all so seriously.

  22. avatar
    Anonymous | 13 July 2008 at 1:28 pm #

    The Pope is the front man for the very famous band, the Catholic Church; they’re due for a hit.
    All bands sell to the youth, don’t they, recruiting futures, suspending beliefs to indoctrinate dichotomies in women, race, immortality, salvation, everything, divide and conquer. That’s rock and roll-ing religions.
    The Catholics make and love music too, so do the Protestants, and the atheists; we are all still hunter gathers, in societies of assorted consumer religions. Your fans are testament to the Church as a fellowship of beliefs, or a cult, or a congregation. Instead of being a Gollum, just be the pope of your Church. You’re not a very good Gollum besides, maybe Marty should try…who’d be the Hobbits, and what about Neuman…blah…see why people turn to religion.

  23. avatar
    tony pucci | 13 July 2008 at 2:17 pm #

    hoofs n
    hearts n
    teeth n

    religion is a sociological phenomenon
    it’s a shame people are so underinformed
    yesterday and today

    i fear for the future


  24. avatar
    Polydora | 13 July 2008 at 3:01 pm #

    “my mum cant come down n see us cos of the pope the bloody pope?”

    Not to make fun of your mother… and not *really* to make fun of mine… But this reminds me of some big shindig the Pope did at NYC a month or two back. Hey, might it have been around Easter? Shit, I don’t pay attention to such things. Anyhoo, he appeared, there was a concert… blah blah… I ring up my mum and she excitedly starts telling me how she’s watchign the Pope and how there’s thousands in attendance, and so MANY young folk, and how they’re all crying, the people in the audience, from the power of being ‘moved’ and ‘touched’ deep in their soul by the sight of the Pope!!!! She makes some other comment about the event, I forget what, and I think she’s joking a little. So I relax and let out a chuckle, but quickly realize she’s crying right along side them from her couch and this be serious biz… The Pope! The sight of the Pope! What’s he done? The new guy especially – he’s only recently taken over the Papacy. What has he done so early in his career as Pope to deserve such adulation? Ah well, to each their own.

    I may cry, too, if that Pope were some revolutionary … the most compassionate, enlightened person on earth, or just somewhat enlightened but totally compassionate. Is he any of these?

    [excuse typos if there are any. I’m not checking. Typing fast trying to get to my morning coffee. Ahhh, slurrrp!]

  25. avatar
    restaurant mark | 13 July 2008 at 3:06 pm #

    preach on white hippy moses…couldn’t agree more on the youth topic. fight it all you want, eat healthy, take care of your skin, do yoga, anything natural to stay youthful…that’s all lovely, but you’re still gonna get old. would rather look 28 forever, but it’s not an option…know some people with plastic surgery, botox, face lift, whatever…they don’t look good at all, just tight, alien almost. and has anyone ever seen somebody with lip injections that didn’t look like they got smacked in the mouth? as far as the catholic church goes…i’ve nothing to add…grew up in south louisiana, everyone’s catholic, a church on every corner…just cold and guilt. you pretty much said everything there steve.

    take care everyone

  26. avatar
    CAPTAIN BEYOND | 13 July 2008 at 4:03 pm #

    the pope should be fucked up the ass just like all those altar boys who have suffered at the hands of the Catholic Church, let’s see how much he likes being prodded…
    Youth Youth Youth

  27. avatar
    Polydora | 13 July 2008 at 4:45 pm #

    captain beyond…


    I prefer some of the ancient Roman torture methods m’self. Perhaps one of those stinging spiny fish up the arse of all them pedophiles would be better? A prick may be too pleasurable, y’know?

    oh gee… I’m being overly crass. sorry everyone. really.

  28. avatar
    timetunnel | 13 July 2008 at 4:56 pm #

    Yep, fuck the Pope. Amen to that.

    You should have seen the press here in current Germanypopeland when the not-yet Pope became the Pope. “WE are Pope” was a headline that made it into all media here. We? That means I’m the Pope now as well? Great, as my right as a Pope I’ll soon step up to the next altar and demand “Witch Hunt” to be played on the organ. Ha!

    Damn, the Pope is really stone age, even worse.

    > they repressed science

    Coincidentally I finished Bertold Brecht’s “Life of Galileo” yesterday. A great read about that topic.

  29. avatar
    davem | 13 July 2008 at 4:58 pm #

    Archbishop St Mullard arose and said: SK – I think you look fantastic for 53. Keep doing what you do. Amen.

    From 86 to 93 I more than flirted with the evangelical arm of anglican church….to the point where I led worship every weekend. I was in the band for Tutu at the NEC in Brum and football stadiums. To my shame I appeared on BBC1’s Songs of Praise twice. When I look back I think I was trying to fill the gap of being a failed “real” musician!!! Actually, I know I was.
    I met some great people but also some of the most duplicitous n power crazed loonies in the northern hemisphere. I don’t buy any of that blood sacrifice nonsense now.

    I still worship at your altar every day though SK. You’re worth following.
    Love to you and all your wonderful fiendssss.
    Love you more,


  30. avatar
    Polydora | 13 July 2008 at 6:10 pm #

    Don’t worry, Timetunnel. There will be no spiny fish or pricks for you, friend! 😛

    P.S.: Everyday is Time Being Day!

  31. avatar
    CSTCoach | 13 July 2008 at 6:29 pm #

    what about a day to those who are clinging to their youth and who refuse to grow up…?

    amen to your condemnation of the bloody pope and his church (that’s the small ‘c’ church, not The Church of course). Totally agree with everything you’ve written. i was sent to a catholic school as a kid (and later expelled lol) – what a load of shite.

  32. avatar
    CAPTAIN BEYOND | 13 July 2008 at 6:41 pm #

    NE IKO

  33. avatar
    kat | 13 July 2008 at 6:42 pm #

    i think alot of it has to do with good genes, as far as youth. think we all have at least one bad vice.. ahem! of course, my parents died young, but i don’t count on the same. it does worry me a bit.

    hi mark, dave m, andy, et. al!


  34. avatar
    Brien Comerford | 13 July 2008 at 8:05 pm #

    I was raised in an Irish Catholic family and it becomes inescapable. You’re internally and psycholgically branded for life. You’re indoctrinated with guilt and the imperative to repent. As a decadent monk I’m also a penitent. The song “Tranquility” is heavenly. Painkiller will be better than Thriller!!

    My favorite Pope was Alexander Pope.

  35. avatar
    the dean | 13 July 2008 at 10:26 pm #

    I liked the old pope better than the new one.

  36. avatar
    Bionaut | 13 July 2008 at 11:39 pm #

    Keep on knocking religion and Jesse Jackson’s gonna cut your nuts off!

  37. avatar
    Anonymous | 14 July 2008 at 1:14 am #

    “Ugliness you have to learn, but beauty you can’t teach”

    i love that lyric…


    Jon from Geelong

  38. avatar
    chrome3d | 14 July 2008 at 3:55 am #

    World Rich People Day
    World Beautiful People Day
    World Youth Day…

    Yeah,you´re right, pretty useless days all of them. They have all been served already!

  39. avatar
    athanasiuspernath | 14 July 2008 at 5:09 am #

    > and demand “Witch Hunt”
    > to be played on the organ.

    …and your wish will become true. check st.peter/BS early next week!

    otherwise, SK

    THANK YOU for zoo42, i love

    – the monstrous Fripp guitar
    – the tambourine and
    – the piano tinkling and
    – the flying mellotron carpet

  40. avatar
    Anonymous | 14 July 2008 at 6:00 pm #

    This was my first time stumbling upon this blog. As a long time Church fan, I was excited to read it. As a person who works with the elderly, I definitely could agree with the general public’s lack of respect and dignity for not just the aged but the whole process of becoming aged. However, reading the sort of hate speech which pervaved the rest of the entry makes me sad. I realize Steve you are a cynical guy but I did think you were a little bigger than this and perhaps I took you for a more tolerant individual. You see I am a devoted Catholic and do not see the need to promote hating of any kind. I don’t see how it helps anyone to do so.

    I personally felt hurt and offended by a lot of these comments but why should you all care since I’m just a Catholic afterall and probably just deserve whatever comes my way.

    I am not a perfect person by any means but I do try to live a life devoted to helping and caring for others, and I rely on my faith to make me the loving person I aspire to be. And I try to do it without passing judgment on others.


  41. avatar
    Gareth,Notts | 14 July 2008 at 6:28 pm #

    spot-on Steve,totally agree!

  42. avatar
    eek | 15 July 2008 at 6:47 am #

    why not old slightly deaf codgers day
    or middle aged women who never got married day

    Because us old farts wouldn’t fall for it, that’s why.

    One of the things that has always kind of weirded me out about Catholics — well, lapsed Catholics I guess — is how much of a hold Catholicism has on them even after they make a conscious decision to leave the faith. My folks were Methodist and when I decided it was a load of crap I just quit. There’s been none of that guilt or angst that seems to plague all the lapsed Catholics I know.

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