posted on January 24, 2010 at 7:39 am

grey day
hoping something will type itself
yeah i believe in heavenly inspiration
do i look naive
it rains off n on
i take the kids for a hot choc then a bubble tea
i suddenly become immune to everything
beauty ugliness anything at all
a friend comes over n we discuss stuff
the afternoon becomes featureless
grey into white
there is no time or temperature
everything becomes still
the inevitable distant barking dog
the lowlevel of bird twitter
how come they never blog tho?
somedays i really feel i am going frigging mad
i get angry
i get confused
oher days are spent in zennish calm
pseudo-zen i should say
or not zen but damn close
but i am a victim of the times
i’m all geed up
i’m all het up
i’m all anxious and got a bad feeling
heinous crimes
incredible breathtaking lies
just like it ever was
but in bondi i feel enervated today
more heat threatened tomorrow
drank some more white powder of gold
something happening but what is it?
have got no work done
not a (soy)sausage
forgive me if you waiting on something here
the weather is heavy
a mist schmist schmog or something
people on the streets amble along
backpackers n blow-ins
colourful clothes etc
oh no another fuckin’ description of bondi
i listen to jon hassell
wonder how people are passing this hot summer night
wonder what the rich people are doing
wonder bout the old geezers in hospital waiting to die
wonder bout the children just been born into this quite ludicrous world
the earth itself is not ludicrous
but the world of men is a hilarious fantastic tragi-comedic fiction
unbelievable like you wouldnt believe
still i’d keep quiet for one of them nice nice houses
with the shady groves and tranquil pools
i’d keep my trap shut
and i’d hang in my studio
ignoring all emails
ignoring all tv
ignoring all newspapers
i’d write a lovely song
i do my little painting
i hide within my house
never never coming out
oh i can imagine that peace n quiet
on long green days of rain
youd see me in my library
flicking thru some arcane fiddle faddle
i dunno
uninspired like i gotta hex round my neck
or a jinx up my leg or something
heavy weather
heavy days
heavy feeling
the nascent storm just hangs there
will sign off
for ttb inc

17 Responses to “portrait beyond portrait”

  1. avatar
    linjo | 24 January 2010 at 9:27 am #

    Steve, all us 'poor people' dream of living in utopia. Sometimes I wonder whether if it did happen, would it change the dynamics of the good relationships we have and would it be worth it. Also would an addictive personality (and I include myself in this category) be prone to letting loose due to no financial restrictions? Even in my own family, one brother and I are guilty of resentment (though I keep it well contained) to see the other brother reaping the benefits of a huge inheritance allowing Caribbean cruises, luxury vehicles etc. Anyway, I can hear you thinking, like me, stuff the maybees, SHOW ME THE FUCKING MONEY BAYBEE!!!! "Money wont change me". We wouldnt mind finding out eh? Got to be in it to win it! Linda x

  2. avatar
    Anonymous | 24 January 2010 at 9:51 am #

    yeah killer, even us geniuses have off days, can't be on the money all the time. here it's snowing like mad, time to saddle the wolves and storm into the northern forests…
    einen schönen gruß aus deutschland!

  3. avatar
    melissa | 24 January 2010 at 9:53 am #

    sk, how wonderful to read yesterday about the archibald prize .. so exciting!!!

    good luck 😀

  4. avatar
    CAPTAIN BEYOND | 24 January 2010 at 10:21 am #

    hello esskay, still waiting waiting…

  5. avatar
    Anonymous | 24 January 2010 at 10:32 am #

    Grey sludge mulch
    Last week
    A blue sky
    A fresh breath
    A gentle warmth
    A reminder of better weather
    Maybe soon
    Spring will ascend

  6. avatar
    matt davison | 24 January 2010 at 11:18 am #

    good time to write songs then SK…
    much the same in Orkland. just with 95 % humidity! Hmmm,


  7. avatar
    Hellbound Heart | 24 January 2010 at 11:29 am #

    yup,some break in the weather is sorely needed……*groan*……i ain't built for the heat, i don't glow, i don't perspire, i don't extrude little beads of moisture on my brow. I SWEAT LIKE A FUCKING PIG…….

    love always……..

  8. avatar
    eek | 24 January 2010 at 1:20 pm #

    "and i'd hang in my studio
    ignoring all emails
    ignoring all tv
    ignoring all newspapers
    i'd write a lovely song
    i do my little painting
    i hide within my house
    never never coming out"

    No, no, no! You're never going to get one of your fans to buy you a super nice house when you tell us this! What you need to do is tell everyone that a really nice house would help create an ever greater burst of creativity and also that it would make you much, much more likely to tour extensively (even in areas where you normally don't at all now).

    When the title to the house is safely in your name you can become a recluse, but not before!


  9. avatar
    cazziem | 24 January 2010 at 4:20 pm #

    Oh dear SK! Sounds like your frustration is very frustrating? Searching for answers and finding only questions; trying solutions to assist with what realistically needs not assistance!
    Way back on 7th September 2009 you gave us a very inspiring blog that you entitled ‘method man versus cool hand rant’. Well, pardon my audacity, but have read, seen and listen to the brilliance that is unique to a certain Mr SK, I feel I should directly quote you following advice you sent me after that particular blog. Before I take the liberty of quoting you though, I’d also like to refer back to a more recent blog just 9 days ago when you shared with us how ‘sadly and out of order’ your pastels were/are in your ‘messy art junk room’?? Well, I tend to find that when things start to slip, if I don’t deal with them, before I know what’s happened, I’m on a slippery slope down. Don’t want to do anything, can’t be bothered to do anything and so begins an ever increasing circle. Now to that advice you gave me: –

    “use your in, my childe
    use your in”

    I think maybe if you sort out that art room of yours, you may just re-locate your ‘in’ hidden amongst the pastels, but if nothing else, you should award me the SK gold star award for paying attention in class. Haha!

  10. avatar
    Anonymous | 24 January 2010 at 4:20 pm #

    Awful. Truly fucking awful.

    Dunno why I did this to myself but just listened to a cover of 'Aura' by some dud called Dulad.

    One of my fave Church songs ever, desecrated and defiled into some dreich, soulless, humourless morass.

    Want to hear it for yourself? Are you sure??!!?? If so, go to:

    Awful. Truly fucking awful.

  11. avatar
    Freddie | 24 January 2010 at 6:58 pm #

    I think maybe you're trying too hard. It'll come back to you. I have faith. 🙂 xoxo

  12. avatar
    Brien Comerford | 24 January 2010 at 7:20 pm #

    Right on Steve. The earth is cool but not the species that runs it and ruins it. At the global warming summit not one person bothered to mention that killing animals for food causes more environmental toxicity and global warming than any other destructive human activity.

  13. avatar
    princey | 24 January 2010 at 11:57 pm #

    Hi sk, hope you're feeling a bit better today, your frustration rubs off on us too ya know, but hey, you're only human. Like MD said, it's a GOOD time to write a song, and post it here for us to listen too, pleeeease Timey Being, it's been so long:(
    Enjoy your day in beautiful Bondi,
    love Amanda
    p.sSorry for always asking something from you sk, can't help myself

  14. avatar
    LF | 25 January 2010 at 1:18 am #

    Sorry about the bad weather blues. Just hang on. In the misery loves company category, NK's hometown has seen exactly 1.3 days of sunshine this entire January. Grim.

  15. avatar
    lily was here | 25 January 2010 at 3:28 am #

    maybe, sometimes
    they twitter instead?
    a gold afternoon fix
    i have no answers


  16. avatar
    I believe in you | 25 January 2010 at 3:44 am #

    Don't be bummed, go get some rum, grab the guitar and strum, get some exercise and run, have some fun, almost like aura.

  17. avatar
    sanfoin | 25 January 2010 at 4:56 pm #

    You, keep quiet? Maybe for the first day or two. . 🙂

    You were born to speak, spread the gospel of love and hate, and touch the collective nerve.

    Don't be tempted by the large villa.

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