posted on May 13, 2008 at 10:05 pm

good fortune to my generous subscribers!
jai jai
hail to vishnu preserver
after visit to skin cancer clinic
i was given the all clear
uh huh a million freckles
but touch wood
no cancers………(yet!?)
you see i got burnt all the time
red shoulders red nose red chest
i knew the whiff of calamine lotion three summers off
i was burnt
i was peeling
they didnt know in those days it was so bad for ya
each time the skin came off more freckles
amazing they let me be such a big star with all these freckles
ha ha ha
anyway the doc was an old chinese gent
he was a real comedian too
as soon as i took my shirt off he said
oh i can see theres nothing wrong with you already
ha ha ha
then he ran this like whitelight thing over me
what do skin cancers glow when this thing hits em?
anyhow
i was worried about a couple of places
on my cheek a weird faded white spot
no thats not cancer you just getting old giggles the doc
then he sees this little knotty scab on my back
its been there a while …i figured it could be something nasty
no its just a ….(indistinguishable)he said
with the skinquacks thick accent n my ringing ears
i couldnt catch half of what he said
then a real benny hill moment
i thought he said i’m just gonna squeeze it
what? i say
youre gonna bloody squeeze it?
no says venerable olde doctor wong (i kid you not)
not bloody squeeze it ….FREEZE it!
oh
next minute this nasty little (never did find out what)
is getting the frozen treatment
i explain to doc that im pretty deaf
thats why i keep getting it wrong
the doc has a good giggle
boy you in good shape for yer age…you all clear!
i said doc im gonna get out before you do find something wrong
he giggled again
boy you right get out of here now!
so there you have it
it aint got to me yet….that evil wicked sun
but its still not over
now
back to greg dulli
having obtained gutter twins legally
n then blackberry belle n she loves you
n even his solo album
amber headlights
a little less legally
i can only say
im sorry if he nearly ran you over
im sorry if hes a booze artist or whatever
but i gotta say
i love the mans voice n his music
when he hits his fuckin’ stride
hes like every huge american hit single you never heard
unstoppable powerful gut wrenchin’
the guitars cut deep
the bass drops away
the high pitched backing vox hit
last night
last night was alright
dulli sneers and begs at once
how can those ordinary words sound new and vital
ah the transformative power of rocknroll
dulli has absorbed the beatles n stones n dylan
and he refilters them
through his engine of excesses
yes the characters in these songs are boozers sexfiends n addicts
dulli is a modern brel charting this seedy territory
but at the end of all that champagne n cocaine and pussywillow
dulli wants to wake up the next day redeemed
dressed in white
like an angel
and then it starts all over again
remember how the gallagher bros were s’posed to be?
edgy mouthy genius backed up with street cred sneer
but actually they were both just thick planks?
dont look back in anger?
dont make me fucking laugh!
look dulli is a mastersongwriter
hes like springsteen if he looked under more rocks
hes like got all that big u.s. fm power
but hes harnessed it to a fleur du mal sensibility
he is the baudelaire of rock
songs from the brothel
songs from the vampires own mouth
the disgust and loathing
then in amazing technicolour contrast
the aching love
the tenderness as the characters crumble and fall apart
is that mark lanegan croaking
ok you fucker time to settle up
lay it down slow them im gone….?
dulli throws away one liners like
not saying its easy to have it all or nothing at all
but man
you gotta hear it
jaded cynical brutal glorious rock
this stuff bleeding all over the place
i give all these records five stars
no dud songs
this stuff is the true spirit of rocknroll
lousiana perches
down n dark n dirty
a can of worms
i tell ya
i’m totally sold on dulli
amen

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