posted on March 1, 2009 at 8:08 pm

i dont feel any different
the substances have no effect
i’m surprised to learn i’m not perfect
i’m surprised to see that i was only jokin’
i walk to school in my uniform and my nice hair
i do my lessons and i slowly grow up
i always nice to peoples mothers and sew polite
i wash up my plate and i in bed early like a good un
at age 13 i discover i can astral travel and i go mad
at age 14 i pick up the bass guitar
at age 15 i discover a new continent in my back garden
at age 16 i start to pronounce “schedule” the wrong way
at age 17 i write a good little song
at age 18 i…..oh its so long ago
the colours were different then
everybody was so nice afterwards
that little book of tips came in handy
mr pierce from over the road was never home
i didnt like oblongs
in the future i would change my mind
the wheels had more of a circle then, you know
i was chosen to walk off the moon
my registration was uneven
my real name was slim shandy
my homework ate my doggerel
i collected and restored geiger counters
i went to a cafe
i looked at the men you
i went from zero to hundred in one mexican minute
i checked into the hotel california
i was hummin’ n strummin’ all over gods earth
a book came out about the different types of lava
the vase looked simply wonderful where mother had put it
uncle hugo made us laugh for hours with his little puppet
tosca richards felt queasy on the ferris wheel
mrs pritchard didnt care for chutney
the audience didnt seem to be clapping anymore
my room had a stale feeling
a piano fell on someone and we laughed
peter and i missed our plain
ricky rolled a joint
sometimes it rained for a while
the phone rang and i answered it
someone had a party but i couldnt go
the doctor listened to my mind
on the way out his receptionist smiled sadly
a car was waiting but not for me
my brother said oh stop it, will ya?
my daughters were fighting
i went next door for a while
there was a strange sound coming from somewhere
i had a piss in the darkness
that summer …boy was hot
they got a new guy at the shop
i scratched my head
the thorns caught in my leg and my blood was crimson
i woke up and felt sick
dad was looking troubled
i sat in a car for miles
i walked down a street
i knocked at a door
i go inside a place
i sit down n watch telly
i drink me milky tea
i eat me chocky biscuit
i fall asleep eventually
what a wild ride!

21 Responses to “scenes from my life”

  1. avatar
    princey | 1 March 2009 at 10:57 pm #

    You make me wonder sometimes :))))

    Hey sk, you probably heard the EBClub is SOLDOUT for Saturday’s show, I hope that puts a bit of mo in your mojo, I know it’s not the size of a stadium, but to see a Sold Out sign at a Church gig always makes me smile! At least a tour of OZ is over’n’done with within a week, it must be hard for you guys to leave your families to go on tour, but I hope you’ll get a bit of a kick out of it. Anyways, we Church freakazoids are going to have a blast whether you’re hating every minute of it or not, so chonk on sk :))))
    love Amanda

  2. avatar
    lily was here | 1 March 2009 at 11:08 pm #

    “Im surprised to learn im not perfect”

    Its not a crime

    love xox

    ps c’mon Sydney! lift your game 🙂

  3. avatar
    fantasticandy | 2 March 2009 at 12:35 am #

    a life not so ordinary methinks…

  4. avatar
    Freddie | 2 March 2009 at 1:02 am #


  5. avatar
    melissa | 2 March 2009 at 1:06 am #

    I’ve got two spare tickets for the East Brunswick Club on Saturday if anyone’s interested! I was so excited when I bought them, I bought 4 tix instead of 2 (don’t ask).



  6. avatar
    davem | 2 March 2009 at 7:34 am #

    Pissing in the darkness? I can relate to that.
    Hope the rehearsals are going better – I would so love to see you guys live. It’s a long time since April 30, 2007!!

  7. avatar
    Anonymous | 2 March 2009 at 9:47 am #

    Wow Davem, you know the exact date of your last kilbey encounter. I bet you don’t know the dates of your kids birthdays or your anniversary.

  8. avatar
    Hellbound Heart | 2 March 2009 at 9:50 am #

    …no doubt, davem, that’s one of the good things about being a guy being able to pee when ever and just about where ever you want to….now being a gal can be excruciating sometimes ‘cos things just don’t come as easy for us….
    love always….

    ps re U2/church….point taken and conceded, brien 🙂

  9. avatar
    Anonymous | 2 March 2009 at 10:09 am #

    Dont I know You from somewhere?:) xo

  10. avatar
    fantasticandy | 2 March 2009 at 10:35 am #

    just realised my eldest daughter camille has digital footage of april 30, 2007…..
    i’ll get it sorted and post it on youtube.

  11. avatar
    persephone2u | 2 March 2009 at 10:51 am #

    You were a boy ahead of your time. I’m STILL trying to work out astral travel!

  12. avatar
    davem | 2 March 2009 at 11:52 am #

    Taht would be brilliant Andy. Ta mate.

  13. avatar
    Anonymous | 2 March 2009 at 1:24 pm #

    u who?

  14. avatar
    fantasticandy | 2 March 2009 at 1:33 pm #

    isn’t that a brand of glue?

  15. avatar
    Anonymous | 2 March 2009 at 1:41 pm #

    Perhaps you do Sir :-)<3

  16. avatar
    Anonymous | 2 March 2009 at 1:45 pm #

    I’m a part time angel who plays violin. What’s that about Kilbey and violins? I don’t get it.

    I can imagine myself gracefully stabbing Kilbey with my bow. Maybe that would help.

  17. avatar
    John Garratt | 2 March 2009 at 4:28 pm #

    “the colours were different then”

    Photos from back then do look fuzzier, don’t they?

  18. avatar
    killer | 2 March 2009 at 8:24 pm #

    i reckon yer making a really good dad

  19. avatar
    ScaughtFive | 2 March 2009 at 8:28 pm #

    That’s the trouble with life, innit? They always get a new guy at the shop. The new bus driver on the East Greenlake Express does not say “this bus does NOT stop in Fremont” the same way the other guy did. Maybe I didn’t tell them how important they were to my daily riff None of these new people would ever make it as the lead singer of Can.

  20. avatar
    John Garratt | 2 March 2009 at 8:43 pm #

    I’m trying my best…and making it up as I go along.

  21. avatar
    catchow | 2 March 2009 at 10:25 pm #

    “at the age 14 i pick up the bass guitar…at the age 17 i write a good little song”…and you did right:here we are now with a lot of Church and SK’s albums!…

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