posted on July 27, 2008 at 9:08 pm

exponential increase
we adjust our range
kilbey turns off at his street
is that kilbey?
one foot in the past
one hand hidden
one eye larger than the other
one brainside firing
the other still
mondays childe is fair of face
it doesnt look like him
the mirror must have lied
a single black crow in the sky
a childhood spent sent
a bass guitar behind the door
jet black
lamp black
velvet black
blackest black of blacks
i need a black outline
my head in a halo of blue flames
colour my eyes gravestone grey
make my little fingers cold
make sure the fuselage is trimmed
apply freckle decals to back
make the nose sharpish
bring her round slowly
starboard starboard mr christian
one more knee to go
let him loose…!
kilbey appears
but we cant get a fix (on him)
aim for his heart
aim for his memories
aim for his lah-de-dahs
a bit of a chamedian
something of the jungle about him
his wife arrives to collect him
whats he done this time? she says in her soft southern accent
a policeman leads her to a cell
extorting money from his subscribers, i’m afraid ma’am…
they lead kilbey out
he looks tired and resigned
says ‘e’s the best lyricist in ‘istory sniggered pilate
dont look like much now…
the crowd obeying for blood
what does it all mean ? says your mom
its like rimbaud stumbling thru mozarts garden says crit-ick
yer husband says he cant sing
yer wife says hes de-pressing
yer conscience says confess confess
yer clock say tick tick tick but never tock
yer dog says wow but never bow
yer canary goes cheap
yer beatles go yeah yeah yeah
yer wallet says dont give
yer feet say walk away
yer eyes say we are the whores of the senses
yer ears cant say anything they just listen
yer heart going boom like a big bass drum
tim powles lazily grips the steering wheel as he rides down route 66
the nz born drummer peers thru the rain
killer he asks
the man next to him stirs
killer ?says tim
the man called killer awakes
were you asleep ? says tim
no…yes…its ok…where are we now?
his accent is hard to place
tim applies tiger balm to his temple
tim says that was the lemuria turn off back there
christ! the killer sits up
his brain is squirming like…like…like a …frog
if we keep going this way we hit el dorado at 4 oclock
in time for the soundcheck
whos on with us?
the low swinging dicks
didnt they just drop a member?
oh ha ha ha
whats for dinner?
waffle king…..
how about ma n pas vegan kitchen?
scene inside cafe
olde lady stands writing an order
so you want legless mayo and tempeh ribs
the kyoto accord sesame dressing with quorn dip
the loganberry cobblers and the stupid dill
knocked up mock hare with jugged bimbo sauce
and soya-goolies on the side…
can i get some not-pork buttons?
they come with the water sir…free of charge…
subscriber writes
if i buy you dinner do you promise to not put on weight?
another subscriber writes
i already gave at the office
another writes
my first born should be hitting your paypal tomorrow
no kidding i sigh
the police arrive and arrest the killer
his children beg for clemency
the leglessman begs for alms
the beggars beg for forgiveness
the police chuck ‘im in the lockup
bail is set
his wife opens her purse and its full of confederate money
the south will rise again someone offers hopefully
the west will never learn
the rest will follow
follow me says the killers killer
who are you? i ask
time he says

19 Responses to “seek doctors advice”

  1. avatar
    tim | 27 July 2008 at 11:40 pm #

    i’ve already given my first and
    second born to chris martin and promised my 3rd to the lead singer of the dudes of starfish but killer you can have my fourth…anyone know how to reverse a vesectomy?

  2. avatar
    kat | 28 July 2008 at 2:52 am #

    sk, time is on your side. anyway, i have a question for you. is it hard to learn bass? i mean, to actually be able to play a song with someone else? obviously, it would depend on the difficulty of the song. but how long would it take?

  3. avatar
    Josh in Chicago | 28 July 2008 at 3:09 am #


    Couldn’t have coined that phrase better myself. Why? Reading your blog, I’m not always sure when you’re joking.

  4. avatar
    matt davison | 28 July 2008 at 4:01 am #

    I ve never said this to you doctor Chez Kilbinstein…

    But I fccin love your art……. I really really do! You are a genius. I just want to let you know that.

    Mr Kshankaranous is expecting to contact you re movie filmed last year is atlantis..

    -and we at the business await shockee etc…caus we all a littlehungry!!!

    zipiddee doo da!!

    in nz I am I am I am.


  5. avatar
    Anonymous | 28 July 2008 at 4:39 am #

    One of his best blogs. Obviously nodding heavily towards D. Thomas, Kilbey graces us with poignancy, humour, punning and confusion – in quantities that Mr. Thomas himself would approve. It’s when he’s at his best, it’s self referential with out the self reverance. If only Kilbey could keep up with his own high standards, he might one day raise his blog above entertainment and graft it onto the conscience of new-poetry.

  6. avatar
    chrome3d | 28 July 2008 at 5:35 am #

    DivinerĀ“s Sage sounds really good. Thanks!

  7. avatar
    cita | 28 July 2008 at 8:56 am #

    Sunday too far away was a bloody good Aussie movie. Jack Thompson is in it. Like the start of the blog with an image /artwork adds another dimension to an already enriching experience.It works well. I hope there will be many more. It seems a natural course to take… to combine images with words. That is why your songs have always worked for me because I can visualise a myriad of images when I hear your prose.

  8. avatar
    Anonymous | 28 July 2008 at 9:19 am #

    After 13 hours of continuous work (writing the project of something so new especially commmmmisssssioned, damn, I don’t care about English right now) it’s all halllucinogenic, isn’t it? Saw the painting and went back to what you wrote at July 19th. Wow, an experience. You are a drug (but please consider my circus-trances). Mental collllapse. Have a good evening.

  9. avatar
    Hellbound Heart | 28 July 2008 at 10:19 am #

    follow me, says time…well, not a lot of alternatives, really, are there…
    love always…

  10. avatar
    timetunnel | 28 July 2008 at 11:35 am #

    Jumping back to your money post from yesterday: there’s a new band portal that might be interesting for The Choich:
    It has a new business strategy of producing albums directly by fans or people who find the music promising, without the big music industry inbetween. Dunno if it works, it’s a pretty new portal, by I like the idea (and I am not affiliated or related to these guys at all)


  11. avatar
    lily was here | 28 July 2008 at 1:39 pm #

    Tiger balm for the soul. Followed you all the way into trouble. Whatsay you distract the sheriff while we nick his keys, and toss old time in the cell with him.

    ps I am looking at your Lemuria print right now, in the flesh and its magnificent. So like velvet you could stroke it. I love it xxxxx

  12. avatar
    matthew | 28 July 2008 at 2:31 pm #

    Oh man, that was INSPIRED! Like a smoothly-edited piece of cinema… and particularly sharp: “subscriber writes
    if i buy you dinner do you promise to not put on weight?” Hahahahaha… thanks for yet another great daily read, SK.

  13. avatar
    Brien Comerford | 28 July 2008 at 2:41 pm #

    There’s a fantastic New York vocalist and musician named Richard X. Heyman. He’s way more overlooked than the Church. His music is great (a hybrid of E. Costello and Steely Dan.) For his last record “Actual Sighs” he asked fans and friends to help fund it. It worked. Just an idea to ruminate about.

    Great blog today Sk. It reminded me to set an appointment with my Psychiatrist.I’m losing my battle with agorophobia/panic disorder.

  14. avatar
    verdelay | 28 July 2008 at 5:40 pm #

    Careful with that sage, Chromey. We’re not talking “pleasing evening buzz” here. We’re talking a thousand unblinking eyes staring unceasingly at the back of your recently decapitated head.

    In a good way, of course.


  15. avatar
    davem | 28 July 2008 at 5:52 pm #

    Very entertaining!!
    I confess that I have a weakness for mock “King Prawns”…. effing stupid given that I never even used to like real prawns that much. Case of wanting what you can’t have….like hair and the sort of body that could get into a 28” waist (and that’s just missus m).
    Love to all but especially you esskay.

  16. avatar
    ScaughtFive | 28 July 2008 at 6:56 pm #

    Scrill trubba? It is a bad time to be a musso running under the olde paradigm, Killah. It sorta looks like the socialist evolution played out in the musical entertainment node of the informedia explosion. The kids control the medium of transmission which is practially yer fookin’ means of production if you be a petite bourgeois mugician. Where’s that Kennan guy and his Containment Theory?

  17. avatar
    nickfiction | 28 July 2008 at 9:52 pm #

    this is one of your better works as of late…… thanks !!! NF

  18. avatar
    nickfiction | 28 July 2008 at 9:59 pm #

    p.s. I awoke in a cold sweat …. it seems I can recall some of my most disturbing dream. I can remember a man….. fiftyish, aussie accent, freckly, had a lingering smell of raggy ganje. He was demanding money from me at what seemed to be penpoint. He was holing me up with a pen……. at penpoint! I don’t recall if I paid him his demands. any idea who this man could have been ?

  19. avatar
    steve kilbey | 28 July 2008 at 10:40 pm #

    nick cave

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