apparently it seems

in the deep lock of midnight

under the persuasion of  a whispering moon

the solitary minutes before and after

we leave our bloody bodies in dream

spirit souls waft with the lunar wind above earth

tangled cords and jangled nerves

even the high and mighty

even the low and lawless

escaping ourselves anyway we can

in the midst of life we find death

in the midst of hatred we find love

paradoxes metaphors music equations parables

life is complicated

life is simple

you get born

you live for an unspecified period

you die

some too young

some too old

some have terrible tragic lives

(oh god we do you allow this…?)

some get what they deserve

some never get what they deserve

what they had coming

they seem to get off scot-free

some people (like me) get lucky

almost every bad thing that ever happened was at my own hand

born in an affluent time in an affluent land

no war no disease no famine

never beaten molested or threatened

i dream up my own dramas

i create my own chaos

i wrote and directed the film of my life

not as good or as bad as it might have been

i bought a ticket in the pop lottery n i won a minor prize

i got good genes coz my dad was a better musician than me

my mother got me interested in poetry

it was a lucky combo

coz i was always obsessed by songwriting

my parents let me be

left me alone to obsess for long hours in my room

listening n relistening to my favourite stuff

as my analytical machine mind dissected  beatles bolan bowie n bob

i remade myself

i reconstructed what i had

blessed with an obstinate streak i was not naturally that gifted

but i applied myself as the carrot of fame dangled riches women drugs just outta reach

i worked on my vision day n night

forming n breaking up groups

loaning money buying equipment learning my chops

a million jams in a million garages

a million load-ins n load-outs

a million hours on the phone talking it thru

a million reads of a million rock rags

a million rotten songs slowly getting imperceptibly better

a million hair styles and a million changes of direction

yeah i put the work in

but what of the psycho-kinesis of luck

what of destiny what of fortune what of fate….?

what of my intuition that has stood back directing my actions ……

what of the right place at the right time

what of the zeitgeist n my stubborn refusal to bend to its influence….?

a winter night falls after a spring-ish day here in bondi

i’m going in to finish off starlings record now

driving thru sydneys jumbled inner city streets to the university in camperdown

where we have some free down time to record vocals

a long nights session

starling deserves some success i’m sure you’ll agree when you hear his stuff

i have had my little share i guess i should be content

i got my fantastic daughters to carryon in my footsteps

i move forwards into the future

resilient but still pretty dented by my various setbacks

i have some bloody good friends

yeah you know who they are

i have some great players who play with me n work with me

i have you guys who read my rantings n give me encouragement

ok thats it

i’m just taking some stock

i feel ok

i’ll see ya all tomorrow

think of me tonight

slaving over that hot recording console

i love ya

sk