posted on May 12, 2012 at 6:15 pm

raymond terris

be careful

the green rings around the stars foretell all ruin

my memory feels something

a glimpse of something long before i was me

it was dark and warm and i felt good

it felt like england to me

another england it was quiet there were trees

something delicious was about to happen

how i long for whatever that was

in the warm comfortable silent darkness

and that strange medicinal odour

a licorice-y smell

welcome to me or so it would seem

to the me before me i mean

thats the me i mean

27 Responses to “the prophet at a loss”

  1. avatar
    colette | 12 May 2012 at 7:14 pm #

    Good you can go there and know to be careful, the air full of licorice ish wish in a warm wilderness.

  2. avatar
    Conrad Hunter | 12 May 2012 at 7:50 pm #

    There are primal smells that always take me back to places in my memory that I long ago had put away. The smell of earth or burning leaves is like that. I heard an Amish guy once say that you can’t get closer to God than when you’re working in the dirt…

  3. avatar
    davem | 12 May 2012 at 10:15 pm #

    That surely is another England.
    Hope you’re well SK.
    Some perturbing news on the womb quoting you as saying all things Church are on indefinite hold?
    x

  4. avatar
    Chris | 13 May 2012 at 1:56 am #

    ..nuther gem…genetic memory?

  5. avatar
    M E M | 13 May 2012 at 2:18 am #

    If I had a hammer
    I’d hammer in the evening..

  6. avatar
    Once | 13 May 2012 at 2:47 am #

    “something delicious was about to happen”

    I had this dream last night…

    I’m boundless, endless, happily lost
    Riding through neighborhoods
    On the back of some unknown beast
    It rains, and I’m drenched, but I don’t care
    I’ve never felt so vital, simply alive
    You take me in and get me dry
    The food is exotic and spicy
    The water is pure
    The beaches are misty, they sizzle with it
    It rains and rains
    I am warm and cared for and loved
    You paint my hair with bright colors
    And tell me they will never wash out
    I am pleased, I am beautiful
    I’m wearing glass shoes
    They’re blue and green
    You hold my hand as I walk through a waterfall
    You hold a silver gun
    And press it to my forehead
    I’m on my knees, and
    I see the circle between my eyes…
    Click.
    The gun is empty
    In that second, I understand everything.

  7. avatar
    Steven Krut | 13 May 2012 at 2:52 am #

    “the prophet at a loss”

    That’s pretty clever. Ha-ha!

  8. avatar
    Once | 13 May 2012 at 6:10 am #

    This is what I remember from my one trip to England…

    Off the plane in sweat pants and slept-on hair
    Room not ready at the Piccadilly Thistle
    Touring the gardens and watching the swans
    A tiny grinding elevator and a tiny charming room
    Overlooking the square
    Prince (the artist formerly known as, not William or Harry),
    Visits the Virgin Records
    Ecstatic, I call my parents
    “Are you drunk?” my dad asks.
    A nap, then Tower of London
    Red coats, ancient brick, black birds.
    Crown jewels.
    Pub.
    Stilton and bacon bap.
    The palace guards, photos, I don’t even try to make them laugh.
    I’m giddy with excitement this place is real
    Trafalagar Square
    Shopping for Doc Martens
    Buying a sweater at Marks n’ Sparks
    Harrods
    The food court is a glorious example of all things edible
    Tea and scones and jam and clotted cream
    Rain
    More rain
    Mad dash across the street to the Indian place
    Balti and marsala
    Pub again
    I discover Diamond White cider and my life is forever changed
    More rain
    Arsenal
    Arsenal
    Arsenal
    Tony Adams
    A family visit
    More diamond white
    We walk with the in-law and smoke a joint in a field
    More diamond white
    Next day haircut in a salon that serves wine
    On the High Street
    Bob tells me it takes 10 years off
    It’s perfect, I fit in at last
    Another pub on the edge of the Thames
    Darts
    We walk back to the tube station through tree-lined streets
    I run into a pub to use the loo and down a half pint
    I could live here live here live here
    A tor
    Stonehenge
    I don’t feel any vibes but it’s pretty
    I buy a sheep keychain
    And have more tea
    I call it sconehenge
    Sherwood forest? Some forest
    A B & B and warm Newcastle Ale
    A look at a map and tale after tale
    God I’ve never been this happy
    A seaside town
    This is the best place of all
    A cold cold beach
    Fish n’ chips and cider
    Snooker
    More tea
    Another town
    Somewhere with steep streets
    Cobblestoned
    White homes leading down to the ocean
    Back to the city
    The Dorchester
    The Ivy
    Tea.
    Always, always tea.
    …Crying on the plane cuz I don’t want to go back to Disneyland.

    • avatar
      Once | 13 May 2012 at 7:20 am #

      The whole time that I’m in England, I am alternating cider and tea…and I never bcome drunk. Not even once, even when I intend to. I wonder why this is, and realize – I respect this land, this culture, this history. I feel priviledged to be here. I feel like an explorer in the best of all worlds, and I care about my well being.

      When I get home to America – all bets are off. 🙁

  9. avatar
    hellbound heart | 13 May 2012 at 10:02 am #

    …..look further into the past and see yourself
    clothed in jade, bone and toucan plumes
    moon a silver eye in the cosmos
    observer of profound prayer
    atop the apex of stone edifice
    constellations course in your veins
    arms flung open
    to embrace existence…….
    <3

  10. avatar
    Linjo | 13 May 2012 at 3:36 pm #

    Dear Steve, glad you remember the warmth and security as a little chap! The saddest thing in the world to me is a kid that hasn’t known the feeling of being loved and valued. The rest is up to us I guess x Linda

    • avatar
      thetimebeing | 13 May 2012 at 5:53 pm #

      exactly

    • avatar
      Once | 14 May 2012 at 12:36 am #

      I second that!! Turning the corner…

    • avatar
      Once | 14 May 2012 at 7:25 am #

      Hey Linda…ref this comment (which I love), and SK’s reply. I have come to the conclusion that of all the things that happen in life, both the joyous and the tragic – all of us eventually get an equal distribution. Or, to be fair, the distribution which will most help us to grow.

      It all comes down to personal responsibility – and no excuses.

      I’m up for it. Surprised to not be overly sad this Mum’s day…just grateful for the Mums still amongst us who are doing their level best.

      We all inhabit “roles” in life, which are subject to change from time to time…I’ve not given any of mine a fair shake – I’ve fallen into a lazy passivity, and blamed fate for my chosen lot in life – key word being “chosen”, because who else but me could chose it?

      There’s no “clean slate”, there’s no “as of now”, there’s no grand anniversary nor significant day of epiphany. There’s no “if only” – I’ve been hiding behind that for too long.

      What is – IS.

      Now it’s my turn.

      God bless both of you, and thank you for this dialogue…

      • avatar
        Once | 14 May 2012 at 7:37 am #

        ***could have chosen it? God, I hate grammtical/spelling errors! Grrr!!

        Oh, SK – thanks for the “split infinitives” reference, I didn’t know what they were and looked it up – yeah, I depsise them, and have caught myself using them frequently…no more!!!

        ((I had to re-write this message twice to remove them…God!! I am a work in progress…))

        • avatar
          Once | 14 May 2012 at 7:43 am #

          I give up…for some reason, everything I put on this blog is flawed…grammatical.

          I have a friend who writes all of his facebook and blog posts in Microsoft Word first and runs a spell-check, and then does a copy/paste…seems a bit extreme, yet his posts are impressive…

          😉

  11. avatar
    Anonymous | 13 May 2012 at 3:41 pm #

    oh you mean… the real you before you entered the current shell —
    the you who remembers the past and the future
    — and tells the other you to be careful —
    but the other you doesn’t always listen, does it?

  12. avatar
    timetraveller | 14 May 2012 at 8:09 am #

    Thanks for sharing, but where is Isidore 2 I wonder? I subscribed quite some time ago but nothing yet. So in my impatience I went and ordered it from Amazon. Waiting for that (it hasn`t arrived yet) I got even more impatient and downloaded Old Black Spirit and Life Somewhere Else from iTunes. And what can I say, apart from everything is forgiven! Old Black Spirit is one of the most beautiful songs I`ve ever heard and I`ve heard zillions!
    A song that in all its melancholy beauty will be me forever… You really have a gift with words and more importantly with what is beyond words. I hear Lemuria and Atlantis and what is lost forever.
    “….it`s dangerous and lethally alive….” (did I hear that correct? In which case, wow! If not, I should write it myself)).
    Life Somewhere Else shines…
    Enjoy Sweden! A nice place. Stockholm is a beautiful city.

    • avatar
      thetimebeing | 14 May 2012 at 8:17 am #

      i want to send you the cd
      sorry you aint received it yet
      can you resend me your address ?
      sk

  13. avatar
    Once | 14 May 2012 at 8:29 am #

    Sorry to butt in, but –

    “sorry you aint received it yet” ?????

    Ok, I no longer feel bad ’bout my errors…

    Hope I am forgiven.

    Fuckin’ A, man! LOLOLOL!!!!

  14. avatar
    Once | 14 May 2012 at 8:33 am #

    Time to rock out some Snow Job and cook a meaningful dinner…happy Sunday to U.S. peeps, and Monday to you, SK…

  15. avatar
    Chris | 22 May 2012 at 3:08 pm #

    Sounds as if you have vivid dreams. I wrote this a while back during such a time:

    Night

    The night is coming
    Encroaching
    Insinuating itself into the corners of my garden.
    Wrapping itself around my waking memories and experiences.
    Cloaking them in an inky tide that raises dreams
    and reflections.
    It drenches the soul
    like heavy hot monsoonal rain.
    Will I sleep tonight?

  16. avatar
    Chris | 23 May 2012 at 9:36 am #

    Steve, been thinking about how you find the attentiveness to God both tiring and troubling, and I read this: ‘Our attention to God is never easy. God may be more inward than my innermost self, but it is that very nearness that makes God so strange and different. Think of a marriage: there is no one more mysterious than a spouse – not because they are distant and unfamiliar, but because they are so near and so well known. God, too, is near and hard to grasp. The wonderful paradox of intimate distance between God and human experience.’

  17. avatar
    Chris | 1 June 2012 at 10:50 pm #

    When a molecule gets too complex to study we give it to a physicist…when that becomes too complex we give it to a chemist…when that becomes too complex we give it to a biologist…when that system becomes too complex to understand we give it to a psychologist…when that becomes too complex we give it to a poet.


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