posted on April 2, 2006 at 11:23 pm

imagine all space is within your head
imagine you contain me
imagine that my memories are yours
its easy if you try

one winter in early eighties
during a break in incessant touring
i wake up in rozelle
i guess russell is still asleep in his room
i have a pile….,
a mountain of shirts
that sits in the middle of my room
this mountain is the fruit of my travels
round the obscure n remote op shops
of olde australia
the chchru drivin up n down the east coast
these bouys never bypass an odd town
nope, the make a (kil)beeline for it
raid the op shops
the st vinnie de pauls
the salvation army
the catholic ladies guild of kempsey shop
wherever a great shirt might lurk
there we were
often actually fighting each other
running in shops to be the first
to get the shirt
so there was at least 100 shirts
polka dotted
tab collared
button down
so i choose a shirt from the pile
a pink n purple floral number
pull on me everpresent black cord jeans (elephant)
pull on mah black suede boots
its kinda cold
i pull on my cord jacket as well
stumble down my stairs
last weeks gig at the tivoli still ringin’ in my ears
russell n friends last nite mix still in bowl
i donna minda if i do
(sound of a hippy wally smokin’ several bongs)
yeah thats better
(jesus, is it sposed to burn ya throat like that)
have my brekky
muesli n a hundred vitamin pills
and a cuppa tea
bongs kick in
mmm maybe another bowl of muesli or 2
need to hear my track of the moment
i always had a track i would play over n over
at full vol day n nite
they had been variously
my flamingo by nick kent and subterraneans
doot doot by freur
i am the cosmos by chris bell
back of my car by big star
this charming man by the smiths
ceremony n in a lonely place by new order
atmosphere by joy division
any way
todays track is hope by the mighty wah!
it goes on full volly
“you lied to me-ee i wish youd believe me”
the song does its trick
and i feel happy n sad all at once
russell staggers down stairs woken up by the racket
morning steven
he manages and disappears
into the shower
an ominous knock at the door
a dark shape i see outside
who could it be at this hour
i open my door
its markus
dressed in his customary black
tall gaunt n pale
like a cross between dirty harry n neil young n a ringwraith
with long black hair
and big yellow car his mother had dubbed
the marijuanamobile
he only spoke it cryptic whispers
almost inaudible for my ringin ears
wanna come up the coast steven
why not…
five minutes later im heading out of town
up to my friends hideout up in the hinterland
we drive thru early eighties sydney
the beautiful leafy suburbs on yer way north
markus is quite a character
totally anti-establishment
hes just waiting for some apocalypse
just round the corner
you better learn to use a shotgun n ride a horse
when all this is gone
he tells me
and we talk about all the guys who are
doing time for possession of one seed
or something preposterous
and he gets me all anxious
so we stop n refresh ourselves a little
we discuss conspiracy plots
the illuminati
jimi hendrix
finally we arrive at his little shack
hidden within a clump of trees
a little run down house
markus housemate is bill
a chinese guy with long black hair
who dont say nuthin
he makes markus seem boisterous
i get the grand tour
there are no, ahem, amenities
there is a trench
and near the trench in all their magnificent natural glory
half a dozen dope plants nod in the icy wind
and beyond that trip wires
which are connected to spear guns that fire a piece
of dowling on any who would trespass
the afternoon changes into a freezing cold night
it dont get this cold down in sydney
we all huddle round an open fire
markus stokes it n prods it
chucks on a few big logs
and soon we’re snugger than buggers in a rug
someone does a food run
mmm vegemite n toast n cups of tea
bill silently takes up his solemn job as bongmaster
and he jus’ keeps on handing it to me
and i just keep on smokin’
afraid i might appear rude if i decline
the wind n rain batter at the roof n windows
markus bill n i
silent in this fire illuminated room
only the crackle n grind of the wood
and the softly billowing smoke
i enter some eternity
this night is stretched out forever n ever
i am still there


41 Responses to “unbewildered by these changes”

  1. avatar
    LittleSecret | 3 April 2006 at 12:49 am #

    I was sitting here feeling melancholy, until I read you latest addition. Your blog triggered a memory of my own. A group of friends huddled around the fire to ward of the early morning chill at Catherine Hill Bay. A bong generously shared, conversations garbled, a great bonding of friends. A lot has happened since the early eighties, but my memory is as clear as if it was yesterday.

    Thank you for reminding me of a good chapter in my life, And for making me smile.


  2. avatar
    Anonymous | 3 April 2006 at 1:09 am #

    How fucking weird,
    Coupla things Steve..
    Doot Doot was a great song .. one of my faves around that time, or I think it came out a bit earlier.
    I suppose you know they were from Wales & later became Underworld, had a bit of shelf life by reinventing themselves a few times but who knows what happened.
    Secondly , you prob don’t remember this either but the first time I met you, you were downing a cone at Rozelle one nite when I helped Russell lug his stuff back there after a Crystal Set gig.
    Sydney in the 80’s was OK.
    By the way, Space Needle is a great song.

    Dutch Pierre

  3. avatar
    CAPTAIN BEYOND | 3 April 2006 at 1:09 am #

    that was beautiful bay bee, reminds me of a camping trip in the 80’s with my two friends Eirik, the crazy norwegian, and Randy Getsky, the coke hound, we tripped out on acid sitting around
    the campfire drinking and smoking
    until the ranger came by and told us to keep it down. i stumbled into him getting up off the ground.
    we had been sitting for hours you see…

  4. avatar
    Ross | 3 April 2006 at 1:15 am #

    Vegemite and Toast and Cannabis and Music – pretty much sums up most of the 90’s for me. Short term memory loss seems to be the only problem. The way my mind thinks now more than makes up for it…


  5. avatar
    Anonymous | 3 April 2006 at 2:03 am #

    hi sk
    i did what you said
    i pretended your memories
    were mine
    that was fun
    do you remember how
    we were fighting over
    that one cool
    purple’n’grey velvet
    it looked good
    with your black
    suede boots
    so i let you have it

  6. avatar
    captainmission | 3 April 2006 at 2:07 am #

    ha what a great trip through yr memory steve, yeah those little forever nows seem to crop up through the old space time continum, the naked lunch, old billy burroughs called it,
    space needles freaking brilliant, i love my ultc, everything in that silver disc is pure joy.

    i met underworld once in north sydney, outside the horrid hq of warner bros. they were all covered in sweat, all sunburnt and looking lobstery and welsh, mustta been about 45 degrees in the shade, but they were insisting on wearing leather pants and jackets and leather hats, later i went to see them at avalon rsl, wierd huh, mustta been about 6 people in there, not my cuppa coco, all that underneath the radar stuff but nice peoples anyways.
    mmm those early morning bongs, always lead to something transpersonal, time loops, alternative realities, elf girls, strange shit man, i had to give them up becuase i would go out for milk and come home 3 days later, ahh. the good olde days…

  7. avatar
    Anonymous | 3 April 2006 at 2:11 am #

    I was there too!
    Just with different people in a different city.

  8. avatar
    Daberhasher | 3 April 2006 at 2:21 am #

    stoner dee-light!!!
    bonglord AND shirtwhore, who knew??? the jewels of thee blog…
    all dope jokes aside, that’s a pretty great story there, boyo…
    now if you don’t mind, the moon and the stars and a wee fresh nugget are calling my name…

    right there with ya… somewhere…


    was that Abby’s shack?;) i hear it’s much nicer now……….

  9. avatar
    Anonymous | 3 April 2006 at 2:26 am #

    I’m with you on that one C’mission, once went to get a pizza and no crap, it took me 3 weeks to get there and a year to get home.
    How the pizza was still warm I have know idea.
    Why didn’t I order it and get it delivered?
    I miss those days, now if I even smoke half a spliff I’m totally fucked for the next week, to do anything.

  10. avatar
    Azza | 3 April 2006 at 2:36 am #

    Ahhh ..Op Shops and St Vinnies. The smell of old people. What a sight it must have been. Four young rockers and some old dear voluntear behind the counter.
    Great story. It’s fun tripping in your memories once in a while.

  11. avatar
    Anonymous | 3 April 2006 at 2:42 am #

    i was more of a cookie girl
    and i loved nothing better than hanging out with friends
    discovering the universe
    thanks for the trip back
    towards our future

  12. avatar
    Anonymous | 3 April 2006 at 3:12 am #

    great memories. here’s something a bit more earthy, which i uncovered whilst reading one of your old interviews, about adulation for people in the spotlight and america’s take on it. funny stuff. was she a good looker at least??

    KILBEY – There was a guy in Oklahoma who, Eskimo-style, came up to me and said, “Me and my wife really like you.” I said, “Thank you.” “We got married to your music.” “Thank you.” “That’s my wife sitting over there.” “Hello, wife.” “It would be a big honor for us if you’d sleep with her tonight.” I was like, what?!?!

    So did you?


  13. avatar
    Matt Harris | 3 April 2006 at 4:06 am #

    Hi Steev,

    Last Munday night in Sydney was my first church gig ever, despite remembering Unguarded Moment (Countdown was it?) from my young teenage braincells still unaffected today by ol’ time and tide and tokes…

    So after many years of hearing this Australian enigma on radios and in my mate Timmay’s car, finally got my arse down to the basemeant to see ’em.

    And because I was there on my lonesome, got chatting to a long time fan (g’day Vince) and got some insights into the playlist, why Marty was so happy (“He’s always like that!”) He also told me to get After Everything Now This, but to listen to the remix album first, which I’m doing. Nice work all round.

    I thought the band sounded very Dylan with their guitars, grand piano (played by the other David Lane) and harmonica, chugging away with ease, under the lights and the ABC cameras.

    So fangs for the memories, and please come back and do an electric tour after the release of the record, Steev?


  14. avatar
    Anonymous | 3 April 2006 at 5:07 am #

    What do you back in the eightees? It is 1983 now isn’t it, don’t tell me I overslept again?
    What the fuck 2006!!

  15. avatar
    Sweed | 3 April 2006 at 6:28 am #

    Thanks again! Love you, Steve!

  16. avatar
    Anonymous | 3 April 2006 at 6:39 am #

    rozelle, nsw, australia. the coffee bean. the 433 to glebe. fat boy. that weird ass vege resturant on evans that charged $15 for a plate of carrot and celery. maureen at the po. three weeds. browns hardware and that fucking dog that barked all night long. bicycles. little jimmy and that handshake of his. nude polaroids. there were times when i liked rozelle.

  17. avatar
    MattDavison | 3 April 2006 at 10:12 am #

    Its funny Steven K and all you Kilbee Bloggers. I am thirty two and have so many of those in my head (great times)I Dont know where to begin. But I must tell of one event.
    Hidding in the earthquake ridden hills of Wellington,LOTR territory sparce dark oak canapeez and two mates, one doctors son, weak and interllectual, the other sporting lad, full of bravado. 20 miles from the lights of the city. An imagined murderer in the hills. me and the nerdie kid were told of the killer who lives on es’ own in the hills..Crazy Jim.. Oh we wouldn’t see em surely… a Fable, a bullshit story fabricated by the other guy..MR TOUGH..the evening struggles on, the longest day ever..
    The wretched walk through the winding paths deep in to the valleys…,(remember the freaky forest in LOTR)bags of crappy scroggen,wine casks stolen from our mothers, whiskey from our dads, and pot from the big older fucca who charged 20 for a joint.
    I had watched Billy Joel the night before @Athletic park, still singing “My Life” in me head..keeping me somewhat happy.
    Night rolled in, harsh, blacker than the ace of spades..
    The story started again perfectly timed as we smoke hash for the first 13 whats the effect..the body fights it as if you are in a headlock but you r oblivious.. strangley excited and fearful.
    12iSh…in tent reading ripped and used penthouse under torch………….Clic Clic…..(What} it’s far away up the hill that you can’t see.
    ….BANG the unamaginable sound of a 22 rifle…minutes pass, seems like years. Clic Click..pause BAANNNGGG EACH TIME LOUDER. and getting closer, the pot and whiskey make me spin I am sick. Nic the nerdie starts a small siezure of fear, crying for his mother Sporty Stu, as dissapeared..Headed for da hills… left us. Torch out now and the crazy guy shooting da gun is feet from us rustling in the trees.. Click click…CRACK!!! THAT SOUND oh my god!..bouncing across all the hills and valleys and firing into our throats…
    Panic is unbearable death could not come sooner…45 minutes we wait to see our maker. I stare at the ground see my friend Nic passed out.
    ….Laughing starts I look up expecting the devil.. I see a prick from school and runaway Stu.
    The rest…..Well I dunno stayed well intrenched in my memory.
    And fortunatly i still like a bit of Mary J …But I fucken HATE camping.

  18. avatar
    Tim | 3 April 2006 at 11:01 am #

    Hey, just reading the comments on the Kilbey blog & I see my mate Matt Harris has just posted here too! I wasn’t gonna post, but im the Tim who kept playing him those church tapes in the car!

    Like everyone here it seems, I have a Steve story. I met you back in 92 I think it was, & asked if you were interested in producing my band’s (the Mandelbrot Set) next CD with Daniel Denholm. As usual, the label (RooArt) were a pack of useless bludgers, & the whole thing fell by the wayside. Oh well. U still got that CD steve? Your influence was, of course, all over it (particularly the lyrics) which is obviously why we were doomed to obscurity! ; )

    (PS if anyone sees Todd Wagstaff out there, grab his balls & squeeze em real fuckin tight for me!)

    How about puttin up some remix files steve? I’ll give it a shot. maybe…. or did i miss this already? what’s the remix album for A.E.N.T? man, i’m out of touch here…

  19. avatar
    Tim | 3 April 2006 at 11:09 am #

    ps: I agree with matt, u gotta get those tours going electric man.

    The electric shows in London over Xmas ..98? were grand. Also saw u guys at thebarton theatre circa Starfish, with about 20 other people (bit of a quiet night that one). First church gig? LeRox, probably around 86…

    happy to sort out the gear hire & delivery for the adelaide leg, if u put my name on the door… ; ). can’t promise a rotary cabinet however….

  20. avatar
    Brad | 3 April 2006 at 12:48 pm #

    Choice cut. A slice for a high and mountain best of time being compilation someday, after everything. There are certain points in my life where I still remaintoo, in molecules and spirit, as well. I can dig.


  21. avatar
    rubikon | 3 April 2006 at 1:17 pm #

    I can remember rummaging round charity shops looking for old paisley shirts n’ stuff back in the early 80s – you used to get some good stuff back then – these days all the eBay fiends pinch ’em first.

    I always had a track of the moment – I’d play it to death trying to soak it all up and absorb it – there were quite a few Church songs amongst them – it doesn’t seem to happen quite so often these days.

    I think all musicians do that – you hear something new, something fresh and you want to adsorb it, assimilate it, make it part of you.

    MMMmm.. Vegimite, toast and a spliff – they do seem to go together somehow.

  22. avatar
    matthew | 3 April 2006 at 2:10 pm #

    just HAD to pass on that, thirty-odd years later (and how odd those years have been!) I’m discovering ‘all things must pass’…. must’ve underestimated ol’ Geo in the beatles pantheon after all… V nice indeed.

  23. avatar
    Anonymous | 3 April 2006 at 2:48 pm #

    the remix album for A.E.N.T is Parallel Universe, well worth the buy, its actually not so much as a remix more a completely separate album with the same lyrics (some of the time).
    Mad scientist type stuff.
    Again a totally brilliant album on its own merits, despite AENT

  24. avatar
    Anonymous | 3 April 2006 at 2:59 pm #

    Speaking of RooArt what ever happened to RatCat?
    Great guitar sound.
    Don’t bother to comment I know what everyone is going to say,but…
    That Aint Bad.

    I rekon if they took the stage now as they were, they would be massive internationally, think about it who’s the competition THE Strokes Wolfmother

  25. avatar
    matthew | 3 April 2006 at 3:42 pm #

    Hi Steve… just really wanted you to know my thoughts and continuing prayers are with Elektra at this time… and with you and your family. I have a beautiful 12 year old daughter myself, and I fully identify with the fragility of life as it presents itself through those that we are entrusted with.

  26. avatar
    Anonymous | 3 April 2006 at 4:27 pm #

    i am having a similar eternity experience. i flew into the netherlands on a sunday and went to this little town outside amsterdam that was supposed to have real good cheese. well on sunday the place is shut down. so what else is there to do? …
    i’m still there, same time same place.

  27. avatar
    Krissythegroupie | 3 April 2006 at 5:07 pm #

    Gosh, it’s funny, when you smoke pot time drags on, yet when you drink, expanses of time are lost forever. One makes you think too much, the other too little! I wish I could survive merely on caffeine.

  28. avatar
    trickster | 3 April 2006 at 6:05 pm #

    pot = span

  29. avatar
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  30. avatar
    Handyman | 3 April 2006 at 10:29 pm #

    Love, security, hugs and prayers for ek and yours tomorrow. Our hearts hurt for you and what you all are going through.
    We are all tested and this will let you all be closer. Be strong, let her know she will be okay, and believe she will pull through. Talk soon.


    Duane and Alex

  31. avatar
    verdelay | 3 April 2006 at 10:36 pm #

    bring back the elf girls, I say.

    The ones in purple floral numbers riding elephant cords…

  32. avatar
    A moment on my own | 3 April 2006 at 10:41 pm #

    I once had a piece of toast that lasted for years.

  33. avatar
    mattdavison | 3 April 2006 at 11:36 pm #

    …And love and energy of the deepest kind to your little girl..Sk with all that you have to do in life , with all your’e commitments you have to deal with. You make a father we all wish we could have.

  34. avatar
    Anonymous | 3 April 2006 at 11:50 pm #

    ah ah..the mandelbrot set, happy patch…there was a good scene in adelaide for a while. memories. now, the only thing is possibly no though road and matt’s little brother. not quite the same hey…
    I see brian on the soccer pitch every so often. he should have stuck to the guitar.

  35. avatar
    Tim | 4 April 2006 at 12:44 am #

    let’s face it, the whole band should have stuck to the guitar ; ). The only problem with Brian on guitar was his propensity for throwing them occasionally (just don’t mention catholics or Aryton Senna…)

    Didn’t Alan Moulder produce some of that Ratcat stuff? I thought they were pretty lame at the time, but yes, compared to Wolfmother they are gods. Anyway, thanks for the props senor anon.

    Best wishes to Steve & his daughter (not that he reads our tosh, does he?) I was just skimming back through the old blogs & read the post in question.

    I’m listening to prince. Must be a paisley thing….Reese Witherspoon obviously wasn’t a Church fan when she said that “no one looks good in it”

  36. avatar
    If | 5 April 2006 at 11:28 am #

    na prahrsyet priyam prapya
    nodvijet prapya capriyam
    sthira-buddhir asammudho
    brahma-vid brahmani sthitah

  37. avatar
    Anonymous | 5 April 2006 at 4:37 pm #


    a delightful story to start my day

    pet peeve kilbey listenin to the

    all things are possible grasshopper

    thank you


  38. avatar
    mattDavison | 5 April 2006 at 11:31 pm #

    Where r ya Sk!!
    I hope Electra is ok..

    ULTC AMAZING… Martys song is pure silk.

    Easy,is the single please please let make go#1

    Glad PN looked after you the other nite… You could have been rolled in Bondi.
    Where’s ya wheels.

  39. avatar
    avalon | 6 April 2006 at 2:03 am #

    New Order Ceremony, somethin about it. I long for those lost, hazy days described in the post…where you just stop time for a day.

    how did life get this way from that. I’ll take the short term memory loss and harsh resin over grindin’ it out any time.


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