posted on September 21, 2008 at 8:28 pm

maybe you see me
maybe you dont
maybe you’ll love me
maybe you wont

i am the being
i am the being
time being what it is
all things to all men
a mans man
a ladies man
an animals man
a gods man
a gentle man
worlds forgotten man
the diary of a certain mr kilbey
read all about it
hes in the papers
hes on the telly
hes in the astral
hes tripping over in the causal
the light in his retina is blinding
my interior life which i will willingly share
my exterior lives
the actor
the clown
the sage
the bastard
the failure
the human
the building anticipation
as it all heats up
father is child to the river
the morning sings in a real voice of birds
the black stuff oozing from the mud
a little bridge in the sun
i will burn it later
what does it mean?
should things mean anything?
if they dont then why bother?
the devil even yawns
kilbeys at his tricks again
cooks up some pairs
gary comes over
brought me a plant
we eat our pears
gary says painkiller gig “best in life”
wow if our first gig was that good then…
are you sure gary?
gary : yes
ok
after pears
me n eve n scarlet go to beach
aurora wants time away from eve
eve has a serious energy surplus
and needs to let off much steam
aurora sometimes likes to be quiet
and enter her own world which is tantalizingly close…
aurora is such a dreamy childe…
and there that world is…she can see it now …but..
its no good
eve cant leave her alone
EVE ! LEAVE ME ALONE….! X 500
so i take the 2 crazy ones to the beach
the ones with the curly hair
their hair is curly coz it represents all their wayward energy
down at the beach
eve gets bored with swimming by herself
(normally having an inbuilt little friend)
and she and scarlet settle down
to the serious job of annoying each other
eves digging holes
scarlet collapses em
eve goes crazy
me warning eve
eve digs another hole
scarlet collapses it
but gets her leg stuck in it
eve starts burying her leg more
scarlet screaming and giggling
me yelling cut it out
eve guffawing
baby hysterically screaming
me yelling
eve digging
baby wriggling
baby escapes and runs away
off goes eve
tapping the babys heels and tripping her
but the baby gives as good as she gets
mercilessly jumping on eves thigh when she slides over
like a wrestling villain
scarlet comes down on eves fleshy thigh
letting her not inconsiderable bulk all focus down
through her heel
and then
ooooooopphhh!!
eve grunts like a t rex in shock and pain
before she can act
the woofle comes down on it again
in the same spot
eve struggles to her feet
shes enraged now
but the swift little woofle is away
eve tracks her down
and brings her to the sand
with a tackle fatty vauntin might have questioned
then eves main problem is how to exact vengeance
while i watch on very closely
you see i was once eve
and scarlet was russell
so i know all the tricks
they chase each other through the rows of sunbathers
kicking sand in their faces as they whizz by
eventually i have all the angry people looking at me
eve n scarlets romp finally degenerates into sand throwing
at which point an interventionist daddy wades in
separating and cautioning the contestants
they remain separate for two minutes
before the whole shebang kicks off again
when the woofle jumps on top of eves diggings
ooh la la
instant replay
meanwhile i go in and have a swim
i do that thing where it suddenly gets deeper
n you jar yer back
then cos i was all tensed up coz of the cold
it got worse
i caught a few waves miserably
but i took it personally
the misbehaving kids
the jarred back
the cold water
my slight case of sunburn
hey today is russells birthday
its monday
its another new leaf
its spring
its all i ever wanted
so
have a ball
alright?

48 Responses to “a never”

  1. avatar
    verdelay | 21 September 2008 at 9:37 pm #

    and it’s all you’ll ever need.

  2. avatar
    Anonymous | 21 September 2008 at 9:45 pm #

    shes like the wind!

  3. avatar
    Anonymous | 21 September 2008 at 9:47 pm #

    Whats more annoying, uncontrolled kids kicking sand on you when your trying to relax on the beach or dog poop? You make the call.

  4. avatar
    kat | 21 September 2008 at 10:42 pm #

    ah sk sounds like the beach was.. a little rough.

    happy bday to russell!

    are you & mk gearing up for the excelsior gig on friday?

    damn. i gotta go to the store. talk about putting things off.

    have a ball. yar

  5. avatar
    flyingbird | 21 September 2008 at 11:05 pm #

    Happy Birthday Russell.
    Tara is a beautiful song to listen to in an autumn morning like today.

    one more day of life is stunning.

    Peace and love to you all.

  6. avatar
    Brien Comerford | 22 September 2008 at 12:51 am #

    Russell is an ambient master on Gilt Trip and Egyptian Register. The ORB would dig his sound. Specifically, Dr. Alex Paterson.

  7. avatar
    Anonymous | 22 September 2008 at 2:16 am #

    this one caught my eyeball…

    Gong fever: Aussie Kilbey up for an Emmy .

    Unfortunately/fortunately, wrong Kilbey…who knew there was a Kim Kilbey??

  8. avatar
    matt davison | 22 September 2008 at 2:59 am #

    BC yess my Friend “Gilt Trip” is something else man.

    =It gets me to sleep when my brains overloaded…

    Happy Birthday Russ…

    MATTYd

  9. avatar
    Hellbound Heart | 22 September 2008 at 3:26 am #

    happy birthday, russell….have a good one!
    ah, sibling shit stirring, what doesn’t kill ’em makes ’em stronger,ay? they’ll no doubt look back on it and laugh…i think…
    love always…

  10. avatar
    Anonymous | 22 September 2008 at 4:55 am #

    woopsy!haha, x ;D

  11. avatar
    Anonymous | 22 September 2008 at 6:54 am #

    There’s a couple of things got an urgent need for some attention

  12. avatar
    eek | 22 September 2008 at 6:58 am #

    and she and scarlet settle down
    to the serious job of annoying each other

    LOL! So true.

    Me and my siblings can still annoy the hell out of each other.

  13. avatar
    flyingbird | 22 September 2008 at 8:39 am #

    Mr.Robert Lynd once remarked of Jane Austenโ€™s characters:โ€œThey are people in whose lives a slight fall of snow is an event.โ€

    I like snow. But when I read this phrase a couple of months ago, I was literally amused by its genial critic. Yes! The frogs in the well: what they can see is quite big a piece of blue sky, big enough to make an apron.

    … um, sorry. I shall learn to be quiet.

    I love music. Is there anybody who doesn’t?

  14. avatar
    Anonymous | 22 September 2008 at 8:55 am #

    Ask Russell why She Spits Out Stars wasn’t a worldwide hit – cos I could never figure that out and I still don’t fuckin know!

  15. avatar
    Thomas Thomsen, Denmark | 22 September 2008 at 9:37 am #

    An animals man? Nah! In what way, Steve? You dislike birds and dogs.

  16. avatar
    buddha | 22 September 2008 at 10:08 am #

    He kills insects too!

  17. avatar
    Thomas Thomsen, Denmark | 22 September 2008 at 10:15 am #

    No offense, Steve, but just because you choose not to eat them, it doesn’t necessarily make you an animal lover. I feel a natural, unconditional love for them. I mean, dog poo…who cares? Is that even a worthy topic of The Time Being? Sorry, I’m in a bit of a bad mood today, and I guess I was a little disappointed with yesterday’s blog.

  18. avatar
    CAPTAIN BEYOND | 22 September 2008 at 10:32 am #

    i bet if thomas thomsen of denmark were surrounded by over 100 birdshits at one time he wood be singing a different tune, even i need a break from my feathered friends once in awhile, looks like my allergies are going to kill me before my time be cos we live in a single wide…
    mjnjr

  19. avatar
    veleska1970 | 22 September 2008 at 10:36 am #

    happy birthday russell.

    aren’t kids fun, steve? i think it’s a given that siblings MUST irritate each other. it’s definitely in the job description. ๐Ÿ˜‰

    you’ll have to share that pear recipe. i’ll bet it’s good.

    lotza love….

  20. avatar
    persephone2u | 22 September 2008 at 10:44 am #

    Anonymous at 7:47 a.m. “Whats more annoying, uncontrolled kids kicking sand on you when your trying to relax on the beach or dog poop? You make the call.”

    Sand would be infinitely preferable to me. Sand is clean and doesn’t smell; dog crap stinks to high heaven and is dirty. So I’d much rather have sand tossed all over me any day of the week. Especially by cute kids and not barking, drooling dogs. =)

  21. avatar
    Thomas Thomsen, Denmark | 22 September 2008 at 10:48 am #

    Captain beyond…that’s why they call it unconditional love. Either you love ’em, or you don’t. Everybody needs to “release” themselves, so to speak. I bet if Steve needed to take a dump real bad, and there wasn’t a toilet within miles, he’d do exactly what these birds and dogs do.

    Besides, I’m a big admirer of Steve Kilbey – I just find it rather strange that someone, who comes down pretty hard on people, who are not vegetarians, would feel this way about these birds and dogs just because they do something, which is a natural part of life.

  22. avatar
    no, sir, i won't | 22 September 2008 at 10:53 am #

    Careful, Thomas, you know there’s no way to criticise any aspect of anything on here without being exiled to a gulag.
    It don’t matter if you’re right in calling Steve on his occasional lapses – ist verboten!
    Where’d ya think Malcolm Arkey and co. disappeared to?!

  23. avatar
    Peter Podcast | 22 September 2008 at 12:05 pm #

    Thanks for the kind wishes people.
    She spits out stars was a big smash in the universe next door.
    When they finish the big bang machine I will be able to collect the royalties.
    In the mean time….
    Regards
    RK

  24. avatar
    oh, what a messy girrrrrrrrrl! | 22 September 2008 at 12:27 pm #

    I bought A Furious Mess too.

  25. avatar
    davem | 22 September 2008 at 1:02 pm #

    Happy Birthday Russell.
    Lovely stuff SK. In fact I’m now going to head to North Devon this weekend and hit Woolcambe beach. Will my mp3 player have any Painkiller on it? Doesn’t look that way – still no sign of delivery here! It’s tense!!
    Love to all,

    xx

  26. avatar
    lily was here | 22 September 2008 at 1:24 pm #

    Dream gig: The Crystal Set/Bhagavad Guitars/The Church and Painkiller

    HB RLK x

    ps some councils provide doggie bins with doggie bags in parks and near beaches.

    Thomas, i guess you could look at it this way. We adore our kids, we’d never eat them but sometimes they drive us up the wall ๐Ÿ™‚

  27. avatar
    flyingbird | 22 September 2008 at 1:26 pm #

    H.C. Andersen’s The little Mermaid has always been my favorite…, can’t imagine a childhood without Andersen’s fairy tales… oh, and the Thumbelina!

    I also very muchly enjoyed The Emperor’s New Clothes.

    Good night.

  28. avatar
    Brien Comerford | 22 September 2008 at 1:35 pm #

    Catholic boy says animals are God’s creatures and humans have an obligation to be their benevolent stewards. To harm an animal is an affront to the Creator. As for my self-destruction and other transgressions. I’m doomed. Gilt Tripping.

  29. avatar
    i think we should be told | 22 September 2008 at 1:52 pm #

    I heard an interview with Russell on Triple JJJ many years ago and when asked if Steve had ever done horrible big brother things to him when they were kids, such as holding him down and spitting in his mouth, Russell said “Oh, he did worse things than that!”
    Come on, Stevo, fess up!

  30. avatar
    Anonymous | 22 September 2008 at 1:57 pm #

    Flyingbird – Steve doesn’t like it when the gits in the flat below start playing the duff-duff!

  31. avatar
    eek | 22 September 2008 at 2:05 pm #

    LOL Sue!

    Thomas — I love dogs and have always had one or two (or seven…all in the house…if that isn’t enough to drive ya nuts, nothing is). I was even mauled by one when I was a kid and I still love dogs. But I can’t say I’m fond of dog crap, especially when it finds it’s way to the bottom of my foot. But because I love my dog I deal with the crap. The problem with many dog owners is they are selfish bastards who don’t love their dogs to clean up after them. Yes, part of loving your dog unconditionally, especially when living in an urban area, is cleaning up it’s shit.
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

    And following my lovely treatise on dog crap I’ll now say, Happy Birthday Russell! ๐Ÿ™‚

  32. avatar
    eek | 22 September 2008 at 2:06 pm #

    …and that should have been “don’t love their dogs enough…”

    Never fear, I’m leaving now.

  33. avatar
    fecal hound | 22 September 2008 at 2:28 pm #

    No, fuck that cleaning up dogshit lark – it’s a dog, it shits where it wants. How would we have used the white dogshit for chalk in the 70s if there’d been conscientious dog-owners around in those days?

  34. avatar
    veleska1970 | 22 September 2008 at 2:55 pm #

    ummmm…how and when did this comment box morph into the “Dogshit Dialogues”???

  35. avatar
    Anonymous | 22 September 2008 at 3:23 pm #

    Those first 4 lines would make good lyrics, Steve.

  36. avatar
    bobby todd (our nottingham correspondant will understand!) | 22 September 2008 at 3:27 pm #

    Veleska, don’t worry, mate, all this doo-doo discussion will be wiped as soon as Steve sees it – he won’t stand for no scatalogical stuff! And no, that’s not a cue for a crack about how he sits for it…

  37. avatar
    kat | 22 September 2008 at 3:27 pm #

    veleska, you are the winner for words today – share a pear and dogshit dialogues! ha ha

    x

  38. avatar
    just in case | 22 September 2008 at 3:29 pm #

    ‘wiped’ – did you get that one?

  39. avatar
    just one more | 22 September 2008 at 3:29 pm #

    Ok, that’s enough – I think we’ve shat the pot full now!

  40. avatar
    davem | 22 September 2008 at 3:56 pm #

    SK.
    I have to say I prefer Saturation to Business Woman anyday!!
    x

  41. avatar
    John | 22 September 2008 at 7:45 pm #

    “you see i was once eve
    and scarlet was russell”

    You older siblings…you guys are evil.

    I can’t hold everything against my brother, though. It was him bringing home the cassette of “Starfish” that brings me to this blog day after day.

    Sorry I haven’t read much lately, Mr. Kilbey. Forgive me. You still love me? Don’t take it personally. You know all about this fatherhood thing. And while I was in the hospital lately, I thought about one of the lessons of your past blogs…

    That’s for another time. If anyone is interested at all (I doubt it, and I can’t blame you). I am rambling.

    John Garratt

  42. avatar
    restaurant mark | 22 September 2008 at 8:02 pm #

    thank you veleska…well played! are we really gonna debate the pros and cons of dogshit??? i have three animals…not counting my kids. a 4 year old mainecoon cat…who is the queen of the house. and to be honest, other than having to change the litter box, is the least annoying creature in the house…myself included. we have two dogs…my wife’s 8 year old rat terrier…who is constantly set on vibrate and my 2 year old siberian husky who is the sweetest dog in the world…at least in my opinion. i’ve always had animals…always will. at the end of the day they are normally less annoying to me than most people i know…once again, myself included. but never, ever do i let them go to someone else’s yard and take a dump…it’s just rude. i actually have a neighbor down the street who will literally come to your house and complain during the fall if too many leaves blown in his yard. but this same person takes his little puff puff dog for daily walks and lets him shit in whoevers yard he wants to. needless to say at this point i’m kind of looking forward to the leaves falling off my giant oak tree in the front yard and having him pay me another visit…i was polite the one time last year…i probably won’t give him the same courtesy this year. the animals aren’t the problem…as usual, the people are.

    take care everyone
    mark

  43. avatar
    steve kilbey | 22 September 2008 at 9:02 pm #

    its sad
    that i often wrote poetry or something truly inspiring
    but that the truly mundane and sad idiots and pests
    get all excited about the waste products of dogs…
    which was never the topic of this particular blog anyway
    my final word
    if disliking the mountains of canine excreta in my neighbourhood
    amounts to being a dog hater
    so fucking be it!
    if you dont like it
    come n find me down the fucking pool
    and this olde vegan ‘ll sort you out nicely
    dear mr wag
    you are so predictable
    boy you must be jealous of me
    to hang around so persistently
    taking your
    dismal
    tedious

    opportunity to be obnoxious
    yawn!

  44. avatar
    Thomas Thomsen, Denmark | 22 September 2008 at 9:28 pm #

    Steve, I think you and everybody else here know that it wasn’t so much your comments on dog poo that bothered me (and Brien)- give me some credit here. It was these lines, “i am drinking from a water fountain
    when a disgusting dog leaps into my face licking at me and the water
    i stand up and fix the fleabitten mongrels stupid owner”. Who could fault me for thinking that didn’t sound like it was coming from an animal lover. I know it wasn’t THE topic of the blog, but it nonetheless took up several lines of it. Just because I express how I felt reading that part of yesterday’s blog doesn’t make me a mundane and sad idiot. I am a fervent supporter of your music (and always will be) and has turned several people on to it.

  45. avatar
    restaurant mark | 22 September 2008 at 9:48 pm #

    thomas, you seem nice enough…and i hate pissing contests…but, even though i love animals and have several i don’t want some strange dog jumping into my face either. the dog should’ve been on a leash. and i certainly would hate to have to be watching my step when i’m walking on the beach, boardwalk, or my neighborhood. i don’t find those comments by steve to be anti-animal love.

    take care
    mark

  46. avatar
    Thomas Thomsen, Denmark | 22 September 2008 at 10:38 pm #

    “dear mr wag
    you are so predictable
    boy you must be jealous of me
    to hang around so persistently
    taking your
    dismal
    tedious
    opportunity to be obnoxious
    yawn!”

    Sorry for hanging around so persistently, Steve, and supporting this blog financially (however small my contribution may be).
    After all the positive things I’ve taken the time to write about your music here and on Amazon, you call me “Mr. Wag” – and write that I’m taking my dismal, tedious opportunity to be obnoxious?

  47. avatar
    mr wag | 23 September 2008 at 11:09 am #

    Thomas, I think he was talking about me.

  48. avatar
    Anonymous | 23 September 2008 at 11:10 am #

    Oh – and I told you it was impossible to criticise any aspect of anything on here, didn’t I?


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