posted on February 13, 2012 at 10:46 pm

whirlpool

i am some writer living in some paris

typewriter days

nights of opium and women

yeah i know some famous people

my name should be on the door

inside my house is red and black

and white empty paper strewn carelessly

i write stuff like this

In the bar with some German Girls that Pierre met at the station

Ingrid and Somebody Else as usual Pierre never introduced any one

(properly) but I was talking to Ingrid and we were discussing the aristocracy

(I thought!) when some great German fellow rudely interrupted us and he and

Ingrid began arguing in German. I took this to be her fiance Rudy Neuman…….

a colossal blonde brute all muscle and swagger  …..he glared at me as he interrogated

poor Ingrid ….he was about forty and in excellent shape a real street bully type…

after a while i grew tired of his boorish manner and spoke to him in french

but this Rudy paid it no attention

so i told him in English to leave off and be the hell more quiet.

Ingrid turned to me

No Jean…. She said.

Too late I’m afraid.

The brute was at me and i took a hit to my eye at once

I clumsily stumbled and bumped my head on a chair

ten minutes later i was i a taxi

with Ingrid nursing my throbbing head,

she was drinking brandy from a silver flask

and singing something soft and hoarse in german

there there my little boy …she said when she saw me open my eyes

you were wounded for me in battle ….she pronounced it vounded

no no …not at all ….I protested

but  she smothered me in her lap all warmth and perfume and alcohol

soon she was stroking me all over …her strong hands under my suit …

Now see here …! i said muffled against her summer dress in that warm taxi.

Yes my child …? .she bent down and whispered tipsily in my ear…

her perfume and proximity were quite overpowering i can tell you…

Her hands reached into my shorts and grasped my manhood ….

Ah! she said happily as she moved her hand in the darkness.

Upfront the Taxi Cab driver i knew was a friend of Darlenes brother Roy.

He was watching all this in the backseat with interest…

He clucked his tongue as our eyes joined in his mirror.

But the german woman was getting out her large white breasts

and at the same time furiously trying to undress me!

Roy watched us intently and I do believe he was becoming aroused

He had stopped noticing the road ahead and with a superhuman

effort i leaped into the front seat while Ingrid held onto my Trousers

I took hold of the wheel in time for us to collide with Tremblay the local gendarme

He was unhurt but his motorcycle was a complete write-off!

I sat there in the front seat sans pants smelling of brandy whilst

crushing darlenes brothers friend Roy..who was not happy!

meanwhile in the back Ingrid sobbed uncontrollably

her ample bosoms heaving up and down spectacularly in rhythm

Well Jean …?.said Tremblay frowning like a dark cloud

Its ok …I said smiling …I think  i can explain…..!

Monsieur… said Tremblay …..This time it had better be good!

 

 

 

 

 

 

23 Responses to “dimanche”

  1. avatar
    BROKEN TOYS AND HEROS | 14 February 2012 at 12:17 am #

    Very Cool !!!!

    It would mean the world from you if you can throw a shout out BirthDay wish to my angel Kristina…I read the blog to her everyday, she cannot wait to start replying…
    The funny thing is that she hears 5 men’s voices in her house everday since she was born , and now she is the ever- so – mature age of FOUR !!!!

    Obviously my voice and Alex , her brothers…
    Your voice and the songs she has filling her world with ( she is playing Block in her little cd play er today)…
    Dave from Depeche…who when she was younger..thought was her daddy ( my wife has a huge crush on Sir Dave…pictures everywhere)…
    and Chad/Pete/Brad from Dispatch ( I guess its 3 more guys but they act as one)…
    Who taught my daugther to dance to her first song she heard in her life…’ Open Up’ ( my ringtone)

    Thanks for filling
    my home with the greatest music on this planet !!!

    AzAwayz,
    Darrin JK

    • avatar
      thetimebeing | 14 February 2012 at 6:12 am #

      happy birthday kristina!!!!

      • avatar
        BROKEN TOYS AND HEROS | 14 February 2012 at 9:04 am #

        Thank you so much and I hope ur daughters have a great Valentines Day….

        love,
        Kristina

        (She says hello to Eve, Aurora, and Scarlet. She wants Scarlet to b her big sister…little angels make this world a whole lot easier to live in each and every day, rays of sunshine).

    • avatar
      ticktockclarice | 14 February 2012 at 9:00 am #

      Sacre bleur, Mr Kilbey. Tres saucy! Hope you didn’t read THIS particular blog to Kristina, Darrin (or at least skimmed past the naughty bits.) Your little darling is at a bit too tender an age to be exposed to lusty Ingrid and that rapscallion, Jean, lol I hope she has a wonderful birthday, full of love, pressies, family and most importantly, CAKE. (i love at that age how they still end up with most of it on their face. Oh, if only we could live our entire lives with that kind of enthusiasm) You obviously adore her and she sounds like she has fantastic taste already. My boys just groan whenever i have The Church on in my car (which is a LOT, ha ha) but hopefully in time they will come to appreciate it. I had pretty terrible taste at their age too. Have a magical day with your angel and Happy Valentine’s Day to everyone else. Certainly got mine off to a racy start, thanks Steve…

      • avatar
        BROKEN TOYS AND HEROS | 14 February 2012 at 11:33 pm #

        Thank you… Mr. Lechter , I pressume. And of course…I do my best to ‘ slightly edit’ Sir Killer’ s’ masterful work…but sadly…so sadly here In the Midwest, escpecially Chicago where are weather is a bit brutal lately…my sweet angel has woken up this birthday morning with a terrible, so very terrible…head cold with all the leaky trimmings. So, there may b nothing worse for a child than being very ill, most especially on your actual birthday…poor thing can’t even breath.

        Darrin 🙁

        • avatar
          BROKEN TOYS AND HEROS | 15 February 2012 at 12:00 am #

          And BTW Sir Hannibal…, I loved your Brian Cox adaptation in the most underviewd version of your playful story. Mr. William Peterson, a Chicago native and friend, enjoyed so very much interacting sharing the screen with you. That is my favorite performance by you, oh and the little comedy bits…you probably ad- libbed….the after-shave ridicule of your advisary.
          For those who are a little in the dark, ‘ Manhunter’ was a fascinating movie based on charcters from the RedDragon. It is a excellent movies, pre- CSI for Peterson, but actual the next movie he accomplished after the exhilarating ” To Live And Die In L.A.”. Whichhw sets firmly in my top 5 movies of all time ( Manhunter is in my top 10, and yes !!! It is that good, for many it will he a hidden gem, at first viewing).

          • avatar
            BROKEN TOYS AND HEROS | 15 February 2012 at 3:20 pm #

            Great final scene of aprox 20 minutes with the looming soundtrack blaring from the classic by ‘ Iron Butterfly’ …most everyone on this blogeee can easily play …*Name That Tune * to that sonic gem , possible oringinator of Heavy Metal that goes greatly unnoticed.

            K pulled thru the headcold and was a trooper…presents and a Finding Nemo whip cream birthday cake will do that for newly crowned 4 yearold…

            Dazza

  2. avatar
    colette | 14 February 2012 at 4:55 am #

    Jaffa?

  3. avatar
    Kristine | 14 February 2012 at 5:32 am #

    Your name really should be on some door around Le Bateau-Lavoir! Alfred Jarry, Cocteau and Apollinaire would’ve loved you as I and everyone else do.

  4. avatar
    dingo64 | 14 February 2012 at 6:24 am #

    Hilarious

  5. avatar
    princey | 14 February 2012 at 8:29 am #

    haha, thanks for the laugh! 🙂

  6. avatar
    That Girl | 14 February 2012 at 12:54 pm #

    OH LA LA while batting one’s eyelashes.Amour is in the air. A small excape from what would have been a average lunch break . Thank you

  7. avatar
    remember | 14 February 2012 at 1:24 pm #

    it was clear to see that the lady was loveblind

  8. avatar
    BROKEN TOYS AND HEROS | 14 February 2012 at 4:12 pm #

    I pulled the bedroom door closed quietly behind me, as if not to wake her, again. I felt her breathing as I sat at the edge of the bed and fiddled with my wristwatch.
    “When will this all be over?” she asked , but most times implored.
    “I do not know”. The amusing trick of the game is to lie, unexpectedly. “The balance sheets predict a significant profit for the clients, but I don’t know, I really don’t know if I can do any better”. There was a realization in my tone and tonight felt different. She rolled over to gaze at me from behind. But it wasn’t daggers that I felt pushing with no limitations until they tore deep inside of me, right to my very inner core.
    “I waited up tonight to tell you something but now I forgot. Something about the kids”. This tone was most certainly different, as i peered over my right shoulder to try and make subtle eye contact… I noticed her silouwet shapely shadowing the inside of her night gown, a new sexy night gown. Intrigued by the possibility I fully turned and postioned my legs so they were directly facing my wife’ s pelvis and for a brief moment , flashes of what once was, once was a marriage with benefits not some silly fucking terminology of ‘friends with benefits’ filled my current thoughts, like lively sparks. And than the coldness came, as a icy winter draft which cleverly sought refuge inside my warm home. This was cold. I can bridge words and metaphors together but it still couldn’t describe how brutally cold she is…she awed no no…no, she evolved, she – became this …how so many good years of wedded bliss could turn a loving beautiful soul into a wretched cold calculated bitch, which I remain betrothed to as a fly entangled in a garden spiders slick silk webbing.
    “Well, you’ll either found a snakey way out or you’ll be caught with your pants down, holding your junk, like before and before ….did I mention…before”. As she completed her sentence it felt as if she whipped her body around and down. Down into sleeping position,” facing away from me. With watch off and stripped down to my boxers and white t- shirt, I positioned myself onto clearly, the other side of our bed…facing the other way and ensuring myself enough space that our bodies would not even graze each other , ever, during the night.
    “Goodnight” I announced as if I was askingx if yet another fucked up form of communication was gladly coming to an end.
    But no response, just a murmur which ensured me that the queen of ice was quickly, fast asleep which I envy as such, for sleep always escapes me.
    “That’s why I fuck my assistant and lie to your dirty fuckin face or over the phone, you frozen bitch” I whispered, loud enough to be said and heard, by myself, again…. and I to , within only a few minutes, nodded off to sleep , for a strange refreshing change.

    Dazza

  9. avatar
    Anonymous | 14 February 2012 at 4:31 pm #

    this is very funny. You know you could make a lot of money writing about breasts and manhood – you do it so well!

  10. avatar
    hellbound heart | 14 February 2012 at 7:51 pm #

    ooooh-er!!!!!
    this is a bit saucy, sir!!!!!
    🙂

  11. avatar
    . | 14 February 2012 at 10:01 pm #

    Very good. Will the story continue?

  12. avatar
    Michel | 14 February 2012 at 10:59 pm #

    I was in Paris last dimanche. Saw two exhibitions of paintings (Cezanne in Paris at the Luxembourg Museum, and De Chirico at the Modern Art Museum).
    There was an accident (nobody wounded) between two cars in front of the Luxembourg, less funny than the one in your short story…

  13. avatar
    Wilfred Paradise | 14 February 2012 at 11:00 pm #

    man, what are you doing writing music? you need to write some damn books. readable, funny books.

  14. avatar
    Ingrid | 14 February 2012 at 11:07 pm #

    Does “Dimanche” refer to Yves Klein’s one day newspaper publication? Love this – very clever and funny!!! Happy Valentines xxx

  15. avatar
    eekie | 15 February 2012 at 4:38 am #

    At least you were wearing a smile at the end!

    Love the photo too. Has a very king of all he surveys feel.

  16. avatar
    Anonymous | 15 February 2012 at 6:12 am #

    Poor cabbie thought he was in for a show. Agree tictockclarice; not one to show the kiddies.
    Simple quote: It’s so much better to desire than to have. Anouk Aimee.

    Take care Mr K and Girls.

  17. avatar
    david | 15 February 2012 at 3:25 pm #

    .. the way kilbey records our decay is unnerving and fantastic


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