posted on November 6, 2008 at 7:39 pm

this incredibly bizarre world
this mixed up ball of confusion
what hope is there but rocknroll….?
sanity will not prevail …
we will all disappear so it must be ok, right?
steve kilbey has gone mad n abdicated
ive been left in charge here till he returns
but i’m a clever counterfeiter
so maybe you wont notice anything
maybe i’ll slip up
in my world
a bunch of hindu indians
trying to find a passage to italy
(you see they were hooked on gnocchi)
accidentally arrived in america
and in a naive hopeful stupid way
began calling the natives there
” italians”
(though there was no cafes anywhere)
so nowadays in my world
if someone says oh the italians did such n such
you ask
the italian italians or the american italians…?
although you should no longer use the word italian
to describe an american italian
we now call them the lasagne peoples
although they themselves prefer the term
the original occupants…
in my world ….
ah it sounds ridiculous
my world this
my world that
by the way are you enjoying my impersonation
of your erstwhile idle idol…?
olde kilb-eye
a classic case of the jumbles
hes madder than you think
madder than a lake
(thats an art joke for the ohions)
you mean youre paying him to write this bilge?
i mean this counterfeit bilge naturally
i mean i cant be kilbey
because he is mad
and i am not
am not am not am knot
why did you do it?
i wanted to
what did he do?
what will he do next?
everything else
a mad olde fool
a classic mad olde foole with a beard
much lavish self description
an egocentricity bordering on the futile
or infantile
or some other flashy word which means something vague
kilbey got you out-manoeuvred with vocabulary
only nick cave-in knows more words
and maybe someone else
but kilbey can trot out words like fulcrum
which he juxtaposes with some unlikely word… say love
then uses a strange pre position
and you get
(french exclamation!)
fulcrum beyond love
love within fulcrum
love fulcrum without
can you see how this is done?
now if i told you my new solo album
was called love fulcrum without (and it is)….
in my world painkiller has gone platynum
it was heralded as a true work of genius
and outbound was played at the olimpic games
a lasagne from america won 4 golde oscars n a silver roger
a bohemian yodeller took out the big prize
a week at the crouton institute in maine
and a drawer in the next australian cabinet
now do you think kilbey would write something like that?
are you sensing the difference between us now?
in my world i drive a panther x-type that runs on steam
the steam has anti-ageing properties (with ocean glimpses)
my car has bucket seats in spades
it has a white diamond dispenser (di spencer?)
it has a octophonic sound system that pacifies yer quivering cilia
it has talking ashtrays and touch responsive manny folds
baybee my car can reach the middle ages in no time flat
and some time hilly
and summertime when the livin’ is so e-z
and yer mamas rich
n yer daddys good lookin
n yer lookin’ for a place to spend the nite
in my world the wag from sheffield is funny
and sheffield is on the sea with palm trees n bikini clad buildings
whilst bondi is a grey blur of railroads n cups of chip butties
in my world davem is lead bass guitarist in $%#
and they just won the mercury prize and the mont de venus
and the sheffield auxiliary wag flower committee award
and the smiths formed in 1982 after seeing the leadmill play at
the church
until johnny marred ’em
that helped maurice see
then their biggest album
the queen is murder( went to numb her juan)
in my world bobo n the hedge are roadies for john foxx
who just sold out wimbledom
and michael stype is a clerical assistant
and peter buck is a kind of deflation
that causes yoghurt to fly around on airoplains
and robbie williams is hedging prunes
my world this
my world that
where paintings paint people
where music is seen under a certain light
where a faux kilbey can be finally ‘appy
where andrew eldritch is on the 100 dollar notes
where andre breton coaches the metaphysics kids on tuesdays
where elton john works in a pie shop selling puddings
and george michael designs urinals
(please dont throw your cigarettes in here: they become soggy
and hard to light!)
and the cinemas and galleries and bars and museums are
stuffed full of ME!!!!
me everywhere
my conversations
my anxieties
my triumphs
my wag
my eek
my comments
my internet
my oh my
yes the future is ME!!!
so get ready now
me me me
buy some try some cry some hand some
we’re all gonna rock to the rules that i make
sang vincent furnier
but i dont see much rockin’ on the golf war…
the kids are wolfing down popol vuh
and have you tried fruity rings yet?
try ME!!@blogspot.burp
check out my prod-caste (the lazy debils)
hook me up with grating new fruity ring tones
and win a price in the blottery
kilbey now available in olive gream
post no bills
star f only
no blog beyond this point


23 Responses to “into”

  1. avatar
    heather | 6 November 2008 at 9:48 pm #

    what a rockin’ good way to start the dada..y

    ta, agin, esskay


  2. avatar
    davem | 6 November 2008 at 10:14 pm #

    But my world is stuffed full of you!
    When I peg it the one thing that’ll link all the fambley and friends and kids will be…”that effing KKKIILLLBBEEYY!”


  3. avatar
    jax | 6 November 2008 at 11:07 pm #

    dude.. don’t quit your day jobbe..

  4. avatar
    knot | 6 November 2008 at 11:21 pm #

    can I send the blog money with a stamp?
    just a bunch of cash stuffed in an envelope? sort of gangster style, but I promise to perfume it with white linen spray and iron the creases out of each bill?

    i really hate paypal, but i am quite fond of you, dahlink.

  5. avatar
    ScaughtFive | 7 November 2008 at 12:09 am #

    Great GooglyMoogly! Drude, you is one Jester Boyce or James Bangs or Joyce and Hart or maybe the Joyce Gang Rides Again. This is the crass version of Thrillbey, right? Whadda crass, crass version. I likes it.

    Jean Kale

  6. avatar
    matt davison | 7 November 2008 at 1:25 am #

    HOPE!!! That’s all I have to say.


  7. avatar
    Brien Comerford | 7 November 2008 at 1:56 am #

    I see Johny Marr was invoked. Morrissey’s so much better without him.

    Gabriel about to join Genesis for reunion tour with hackett on guitar and collins on drums. Good move because his last few solo CD’s were pretentious duds. Gabriel Genesis years were/are dynamite.

  8. avatar
    ross b | 7 November 2008 at 2:24 am #

    ah, the lasagne peoples!

    but if you’re a southern ‘toenail’ italian like me you’re merely a red hot chilli pepper!!

  9. avatar
    kat | 7 November 2008 at 3:08 am #

    ha ha! lets hear it for all the quivering cilia

    i’m seeing my lasagne people tomorrow, sk. deb. her last name is trifilio. gee, i wonder if that is italian enuf.

    brien, i take it you don’t like modest mouse. i do, but moreso the older stuff.

  10. avatar
    CAPTAIN BEYOND | 7 November 2008 at 4:40 am #

    Hey Brien, where did you hear that bout Genesis Reunion Tour???

  11. avatar
    kat | 7 November 2008 at 4:55 am #

    it mite be listed on myspace, capt. b – not sure

  12. avatar
    captain mission | 7 November 2008 at 7:23 am #



  13. avatar
    fantasticandy | 7 November 2008 at 7:53 am #

    i like your world killer.
    even my boys would have a chance in it.

    nice one!

  14. avatar
    Hellbound Heart | 7 November 2008 at 10:26 am #

    love your blog today, matey….

    night night guys….i’m stuffed….

    love always….

  15. avatar
    princey | 7 November 2008 at 11:21 am #

    I just read that The Church are playing the “GoldenPlains” Festival in March (details on GP website), hopefully that means a tour for oz in March?! Fingers crossed!

  16. avatar
    12str | 7 November 2008 at 3:03 pm #

    keep on bloggin´in the free world 😉
    U Rock Killah

    have a nice weekend


  17. avatar
    Brien Comerford | 7 November 2008 at 5:29 pm #

    Captain Beyond:

    Rolling Stone Website. All Genesis menbers agree and are awaiting Peter Gabriel’s decision.

  18. avatar
    Tyler | 7 November 2008 at 5:55 pm #

    Steve, as I live near Sheffield, the references to the city in today’s blog made me wonder what was going on – so I made an exception and read the comments. I haven’t done so since the dogshit turmoil several weeks ago – that was more than enough for me, thanks.
    Having now read back the ‘correspondence’ from the idiot anonymous wag , I felt I should respond. Just this once. It looks to me as if the idiot in question is checking through your site meter at the bottom of the page, trying to figure out where someone may be viewing the blog from and then posting anonymous comments as if from them, in order to stir up bad feeling, etc.
    These references to ‘the university of sheffield’ (which may be its correct title but is not a term any English person would actually use) would appear to be intended to impersonate me, as I use the university’s computer system and would be logged in the site meter with this url.
    Frankly, the idiot can say whatever he likes – as I don’t usually read the comments any more, I’ve not even been aware of what’s been going on. Although the dismal attempts to stir up trouble would be more effective if he’d known that I was a member of staff, not a student, and don’t actually live in the city. Oops, now he does know, so watch for that to change in his next barrage.
    What prompted me to post this today was the impression from the blog that you yourself had accepted that this idiot ‘wag’ actually was from Sheffield. And that as I’m the one who’s contributed a couple of hundred bucks to TTB in the past, you’d assume that the idiot was in fact me. Steve, you should still have my email address from those contributions, so if there’s anything I can do to reassure you further, you know how to find me. Please feel free to check anything you like.
    In fact, if Russell can check back in the site meter log to see who was on-line when the idiot wag anon. was making his comments you’ll be able to see that there wasn’t, in fact, anyone accessing the site from here.
    I suspect the comment you made about a diasaffected American musician was, in fact, accurate. I know sending this risks further abuse from the idiot but, hopefully, this will at least have cleared some things up.

  19. avatar
    glynnisjohns | 7 November 2008 at 7:15 pm #

    I’ve always loved the word “Fulcrum”.
    Rolls of the olde tongue quite nicely…

    Like “Azure,Ahura Mazda,Azimuth, Atahualpa,Hyacinth and Palenque”.

    Weird, so am i.


  20. avatar
    steve kilbey | 7 November 2008 at 8:19 pm #

    dear tyler
    no problems
    i never thought it was you!!
    viva sheffield!

  21. avatar
    EDD | 7 November 2008 at 8:52 pm #

    So, You don’t have to be who you are…I like it.

  22. avatar
    EDD | 7 November 2008 at 8:54 pm #

    Didn’t mean to comment thrice…

  23. avatar
    eek | 7 November 2008 at 9:32 pm #

    and the cinemas and galleries and bars and museums are
    stuffed full of ME!!!!
    me everywhere
    my conversations
    my anxieties
    my triumphs
    my wag
    my eek
    my comments
    my internet
    my oh my
    yes the future is ME!!!

    Well at least you’re humble. 😉


Leave a Reply

You must be logged in to post a comment.