few people know that from 1977 to 1979
i was the bass player n marimba player
for
hubba bridge n the manly fairies
australias greatest unsung space rock band/collective
hubba was the leader
now doubt about that
he was the singer and gong-player
i can see him now
a tie-dyed 3 button grandpa tshirt
hi-waisted anti-lope flares
scuffed beatleboots
his ho chi minh beard dipping n diving in the breezes
hubba came from a long line of hippies n freaks
his mum had studied under steiner
his dad had been in cuba with che g
his big sister had been a girlfriend of some big band
his grandma had dated al. crowley briefly
anyway
hubba didnt care that spacerock was passe by the late seventies
he’d hadda peak experience list’nin to space ritual
whilst on pot acid peyote dmt stp x y and z
man, hubba could do all the stage announcements too
how he used to make us laugh
bursting into the commune teepee at 4 in the morning
high on datura and screaming
beware of sonic attack!
hubba had assembled a wilde crew as his space cohorts
ian “negative’ farquar played guitar n calliope
he also fucked around with these cut up tapes
splicing up
houston we have a problem
with
cows mooing
he said it was kinda atom heart mothery
on drums was gas
gas was a laughing gas freak
his dad was dentist
n gas had an endless supply
he had frizzy ginger hair down to his arse
and a girlfriend who dealt purple heads n angelfruit
boy he could lock into a space groove
and nail it for hours
sometimes high on the gas
gas would mix up his drums
and play the cymbal parts on the bass drum
and the bass on the snare etc etc
this sometimes threw the rest of us into a great confusion
but hubba used to say
no worries ….its just cosmic confusion
on keyboards was jerry mac hoota
who had a mellotron and a moog
and a thing that went
fffssshhhheeewwwzzzzzzzzsshheeeewwwwfffffffssss
put an echo on that
and it symbolised the rush of deep space
jerry hadda day job unfortunately
to pay off all his expensive equipment
and most time he missed gigs n rehearsals
hubba called him a capitilist bastard
which was kinda harsh
cos jerry was stacking cans of beans at woolworths
anyway eventually hubba took over payments on the thing
that went fffsshheewwsszzzffsseeeww
and we just turned it on at the start of the gig
and let it run all the way through
brian “salad” simmons was our woodwinds man
he was a terrible player
but after you put his flute n sax
through all those pedals
it didnt matter
salad was like the thing that went fffssshhheeewwwwwsssheeezzzz
he was constant bubbling burping babbling racket
giving the impression of intergalactic hyperdrive
hubba n salad had been mates for ages
hubba had a kid with salads sister narelle
the kid used ta come on stage and bang a tambourine
during
“the crossing of the synapse( part 2)”
we’d only played that one once
at a uni gig
the students had been promised a”new wave” act
the plastic pants
when the pants didnt turn up
hubba n the fairies were booked at the last moment
accidentally
the plastic pants were riding high in the charts
with their song
1 2 i hate you
and their album
the plastic pants wear you!
anyway those fucking students were angry
when the collective turned up in their kombi
you hippy bastards they called out at me n gas
as we struggled with hubbas gong up the stairs
hubba called me the killer
i was the youngest guy in the band
hubba bossed me round a fair bit
and he’d try out new psychedelic drugs he wasnt game to try(!?)
on me first
c’mon killer hed say
just take a little bit for hubba
one night i was playing on a combo
of sixty mescal worms, 3 bottles of nutmeg
and something hubba had cooked himself called party mash
and yes this was during my angelfruit addiction as well
hubba stalked over to me angrily as i laboured over my marimbas
killer you totally fucked up martian holiday!
hubba i dont even know where i am let alone play any instruments…!
wow is it that good ?asked hubba gleefully
the next gig everyone took the same combo
ah i think we’ll change martian holiday and do andromeddan harpoon tonite
announced hubba casually as the drugcocktale took effect
negative wasnt happy
i need my double neck for the retro rockets part he grumbled
of course this was the gig at the uni
the kids were all drunk n speeding
and ready for a half hour of the pants
instead they got space rock opera
which lasted 3 hours 20 minutes
hubba mimicking weightlessness
by swimming around on the floor
the rest of us dressed in ww 1 aviator goggles
parachute suits, pyjamas, and wet suits
our long wild hair shaking in the zero gravity
of our repetive racket
my instruments are going haywire hubba intoned thru metallic echo
space fever we all hissed into our mikes
im a white light messiah screamed hubba
space fever we hissed back
i never should have married that bitch from pluto moaned hubba
space fever we hissed again
turn down the gravity hubba called out
space fever, space fever we whispered
salad picked up his bassoon which after going thru a wah wah
sounded like the pulsation of an impending implosion (said hubba)
needless, doubtless to say the new wavers at the uni were not impressed
the booker pulled the plug for the first time
if you guys dont do something punk or new wave its curtains he screamed
ok ok said hubba we gonna do our most new wave song
the thing that went fffsheeeewssshhhfffeeewsss came back on
and hubba softly pounded his gong
a beer can hit me in the shoulder
hippy dribble shrieked an incensed mohawk n safety pinned punkette
bullshit roared the pvc n floppy fringed new wave students
hubbas cockroach earrings jiggled as he moved
people were throwing things
and jumping up on stage
i saw hubba go down from the side of the stage
while the punkette beat me over n over with my marimbas
after that it all went black
when i woke up back in the teepee
hubba was nursing a black eye and a mournful expression
the thing that went ffsshewwwssshhheeffzzees got busted
and i still owe a thousand dollars on the repayments he said
a light was going off in my head
i realised hubba and his band were going nowhere fast
i began secret rehearsals with a new wave band i was forming
stiff young hounds we were called
well i guess the rest is history
the hounds became sausage
we changed our name to the satin oddysey
and then mx345
before finally settling on the chrunch
at our most triumphant gig at the leather martini, 1981
in adelaide
guess who supported us
yep
hubba n the fairies
killer you little fuckin traitor hubba fumed
as our paisley n mascara crowd sat sullenly thru hubbas set
but when they did martian holiday
i jumped up n got on the marimbas
just like olde times grinned hubba
i guess old habits die hard