finally i meet my dental waterloo
my four front upper teeth reduced to pins
to accommodate my new crowns
(what a king)
i spend 3 hours in the chair
after a bit of an argument
my dentist gives me the maximum gas
while he drills my teeth away
and takes impressions etc
meanwhile where do i go…?
i recede away from this world as is my wont
i breathe in the gas and i evaporate behind my screaming teeth
i finally realize …just like the walrus said…
theres nothing to get hung about
action seems unnecessary
all my wriggling jiggling where will it get me but the grave
i dissociate from myself
whoever i am today
wherever i was
its 2010 the distant future
my mouth is full of chemicals
pre-anesthetic
anesthetic itself
impression paste
my old n rotten teeth as they are drilled
glue and cloves and god knows what
the gas mask is hurting
pushing down on my partially numbed nose
inside my head
i think of one thousand things
my old lives yes
or my old lies i cannot tell
i was a soldier who laid waste ilium
covered in other mens blood
i hooked charioteers with my barbed spear
i burned heifers to lord zeus
who seemed to answer my prayers
i raped the women in the city
i looted the houses
and i sat back drinking red wine
while some quack stitched up my leg and my arm
miles away somewhere the dentist
is drill drill drilling
my mouth is open
my lip is split
the assistant sucks the saliva out of my mouth
the city of sydney looms around grey n faceless
my face hurts in every world
i must write this down in my blog i say to myselves
but what was it i wanted to write?
music from a terrible radio station filters through n down
down in my head where i’m drowning in gas
i walk the streets of russia
i live in my little apartment where i drink tea
i am quite mad
but i write lovely music on my piano
its cold today
i’m freezing in here
the music i write turns into birds that fly away
the snow falls down outside and i am quietly sad
i see myself in the mirror
some shadow in the candlelight
the sound of horses and sleighs
the taste of stale bread
no firewood left
the grate grows cold
i retire to my bed to keep warm
even sleep does not come
i lie awake in some confused reverie
when the drill interrupts my life
the dentists is saying
can you open a little wider please
i long for it to end
all of it
the lights in my eyes
the noise inside my mouth
resonating in enamel
the sensation of helplessness
finally its over
i stumble out into cold daylight
and walk about 5 kms in a daze
i take codeine when i get home
more drugs
more haze
more daze
less days