whats occurring there?
how are you feeling about everything?
what are you doing here now?
what can you find that would bind you to me?
today its raining at the coast
reminding me of a hundred times
down the sea with mumndadnrussell
backseat of the car
wed driven down for a swim
now its raining
dads got his window open
smoking
when he smokes he doesnt hold it
between his two fingers
he holds it covered by his palm n backwards
boy my dad sure likes smoking
i try to sometimes suck in the smoke
to tasteit
to see what its all about
but its secrets elude me
dad smokes like this coz of the war i suppose
mum doesnt smoke
she says shes never even tried it
and i believe her
we’re eating some vinegary chips
and dads getting angry
cos me and russell are feeding the gulls
and theyre landing on the cars bonnett
russells a lot younger than me
hes a nice brother
tho im not very nice to him
dad puts the radio on
a lovers concerto by the toys comes on
i read somewhere that it was based on some music by modzart
or beathoven or some oldtime composer
“how gentle is the rain
that falls softly on the meadow…”
oh yeah sitting in this car
i can really dig that
the song sounds like its being sung by a lil choir
of black motor city angels
“and if your love is true
i will give to you
every part of me”
well these lines really got me thinkin’
about all that adulthood
spreadin’ out before me
like a snake in the sun
i will give to you
every part of me
i decide this is the most singularly erotic
lyric ever from a pop song
yet very romantic too
the way i could still remember things were
back in the ionian days
when “i”d been someone else
in fact i was an expert in greek mythology
at age 10
the teachers in my school would ask my opinion
i aint kiddin’
i devoured this stuff
i felt these were my real people
i looked out the window thru the silver streaks
of australian rain
were parked by a little beach
on an estuary down the south coast
you can rent little paddleboats
and archaic surfboards
the greene grass grows all the way down to the sand
there is no car park
there are no other cars
the pressure of this aloneness
comes down on me
why am we here on this rainy afternoon
4 strangers now family
some strange trick has isolated me here
in the 1960s
on this strange continent
as a childe…
i flick in n out of this state
flipflopping between a precoshus kidd
and some other bunch of things
i can never understand
the rain stops a bit
and a pale sun struggles thru
me n russell climb out of the car
running around with our boxer dog
and our model aeroplanes
russell runs into the water
and goes straight in
i linger around up to my knees
i seem more delicate n wimpy than him
days like this seem to stretch on forever
then suddenly recede into a distant past
miles ago
when everything was different
maybe more friendly
then i look up
its 2006
here i am at a computer
od ing on MEMORY
i guess
see ya round the traps
sk