posted on January 2, 2006 at 11:08 am

here i am
life at last
yesterday it was 44 degrees
thats way up over a hundred farenheit
the second hottest day
since they started taking the temp
there was no relief
we went down to clovelly
my brother waited behind some people
who were leaving in the carpark
for 15 minutes
so crowded was it
ah but the water
cold, clear
full of many different fishies
people schnorkelling
ah sweet relief
the pavement could still
burn yer feet at 9 oclock at night
look i lived here a long time
seen many hot days
but this was monstrous my weatherfiendss
my spirits of the sky
my gremlins in the static
do you care about the weather
in sydney
i don’ think so
if yer tuning in
from some miserable cold
gritty damp drafty hole
(like say…
some wretched cold water flat
in south ken
putting 50 p bits in
as yer takin’ a shower
in the communal bathroom
and yer freezin’ yer bollocks off
you don’ wanna hear about
the tranquil bondi zephyrs
or the sound of the sea
gently crashing to the sure
but its a quiet and sombre bondi
gone the razzle
the dazzle
the tourists?
they hit the road, jack
the brazilian coke deelahs?
spending yule in rio with their granny
the tramps hobos and orcs?
still out there im afraid
eurotrash backpackersss?
same as above
pommies or oioirish ladsss
carryin’ slabs o beere?
we still got those too
yobbos from the suburbs?
next weekend if its sunny
rich slim families
from italy and france…?
thanks for makin’ me feel like a bricklayer
loads o gay bouys?
the mardi gras is comin’ up
aussies and mossies
ready to fight it out
on the beaches?
thankfully they are thinne on the grounde
but i xpect theyll bee back
what about the fireworks from the bridge
which you watched from yer kitchen window?
excellent stuff
especially with bohemian enhancement precautions
which were taken
“in case the fireworx were boring”
but they werent
and ole sk
aint no big fan of fireworks
or circusses
being in a large crowd
county fairs
swimming carnivals
archery practice
harmony rehearsals
preplanning meetings
reality shows
talent contests
computah animation
kids shows
sports shows
cop shows
family shows
country and westin
alt or emo
hip hop house trancey chill out
death black speed or heavy metal
theory of evolution
all politicians
parking police
rules and regulations
customs menne
and their doggiess
fat pig record execs w/extensive bonus package
and viagra prescription
dolly birds
cranky olde ducks on busses
kidss screaming for no reason
rob e willy’mmss
agentsss…you theivess….
you achieved the opposite
of what was intended.
the law
which IS an ass
the establishment:
nice one
its all going nicely, isnt it?
scientific culling of whales:
we really need to do this..
and itd be a shame to
waste all dat blubbah…
warss liberating people
yeah, right
smart bombs
if it was smart
it wouldnt be a fuckin bomb
sorry bout the
collatral damage people
we’ll get you another neighbourhood
after the elections are held

calm down olde mane
i never thought i’d see a pol-itty-cle
sprouting forth from
the tapered lovely fingertips
of mr uninvolved
but now i got a forum
i can gush this ye olde tripe out
on my unsusspecting reeders
but what are ya trying to say olde sun,
we all knowin’ war is no goode….
yr wright..
i m slurring my blogg
i’m that obnoxious prick in a bar
screamin in yer ear
his fascist
or communist
yeah thats right pal
nuke them little babiess
thats right!
tiresome socialist turkeyss
whove never paid tax
xenophobes who never been anywhere
arachnophobes who hate the lime spiders
melbounians who think sydney has gone all u.s.
puh leeze whassup w’ chall,not.
sydnee-ites who think london
is a miserable expensive dump
why on erf would ya fink that?
anyone who thinks the big apple is outtasite
you aint never had a bite
oh europe
yer so sivvylized
oh im so impressed
ok rome im givin’ yer that
not a badde olde eternal city
actually most of italy
i find very accomodatin’
truly a place
for the lover of fine things
yess italia
i still think of you
quite often
the piscinas
the italian night
the hazy soft summer skies
your coastlines and harbours
the contagious essential
bohemian-ness of your
mercurial people
switzerland aint half badde either
i really like it there too
a few more bo hemmians
than you might think
sorry garcons and filles
not my cuppa tea
rather appreciate from a distance
scandi nayvia
its got its goode points
summer the women
its got its badde points
winter the women
sorry ms inga persson
of svenby in smaland
dont change that dial
where was i?
exciting but harsh
a badde place to be a vegan
but nice
if ya like hashish
and a wild crowd
very poore baby
but charming too
very fuckin coole, baybee
very fuckin’ coole
great britain
a little self aware,
i always feele
the u.s.?
a complicated one
the very best
the very worst
all in one
if you can avoid the worst
and stick to the best
well ok
if ya cant…
and you know
that ole sk couldnt…
dont mess with it
coz they will nail ya baby
unlike anywhere fuckin else
you gotta take it seriously
some of it
will terrify ya
if youre not a namerican
theres a heavy feeling in lotsa places
ha ha
i ate a magic mushroom
one morning
in detroit
i was bored
and it was all i had
i dropped it
and stepped out onto the snowing fucking
streets of detroit
what were you thinking olde been
i wasnt thinkin’ goode buddy
the horror
the homeless
the faceless
the junkies
the cold hearted “straightss”
ignorin’ the catastrophy around ’em
the rich bitches in the fursss
the young guys in suits
with gelled hair
and purrfect teeths
the people in the bars
staring outta smoke
with grey faces and dead eyes
cmon sk, didya get a song out of it?
no way, my manne, i wass too scared
but in contrast to all that
i spent a coupla months in malibu
and it makes bondi look like leeds
vegan whatnots
ye olde soy smoothies
with ginseng and mandrake root
famous glamourous people
livin’ it up to the hilt
havin’ it fuckin ‘ large..
palm trees
coconut shacks
beach houses
colour tv, air con and pooles
which america do ya think of
and dee troyt and mallyboo
are only 2 points on a huge grid..
i dunno
sks jury out on the usa
dont know much about asia baybee
keep mah big blogg shut
there ya have it
i dont know why im writing this
i dont know why youre reading it either
dont sweat the small stuff people
but dont neglect the details
look before you leap
cos he who hesitates is lost
i love you

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