posted on March 28, 2007 at 8:53 pm

i dont have any answers my lovelies
own-lee questions questions questions
questions on toppa questions
but not one
not one miserable excuse for an answer
f’rinstance yessaday
i was standing in a queue
it could have been a line
except it was between 2 “straight” points
i decided to measure the various radii
of vicious circles
and had enlisted the aid of a man from the cycleshoppe
he made rolls
he made me so angry
people i was confused by my pi and source
my little pigs you know im no good with somes
have i told you about my numerical blindspot
its between 1 and 100
cant see those nombres approaching hombres
im so mixed up with arithmetic and algae bra
it sure doesnt make me want to multiply baybee
slam those digits together olde sk
whats a few thousand here or there my sun
take it out on me mama
soon i was into a long division
down n down i went
a vulgar fraction of my former selves
entering the sub atomic kingdoms
a micronaut
hold me closer tiny sailor
on each electron there whirls planets
each planet peopled by civilisations
rising and falling like my true loves breast
in the morning
each of their microns peopled by teeming universes
and down and down and down
i ve been a criminal in a million sub-cosmos
smaller than a bees dick
shrinkman shrink
on minute world# 131313
i met a manne
a meta-man you could say
i was certain he had an answer on him
or at least a vague guarantee
he said
everything is indeed relative
we are all hewn from starflesh
that kind of thing
the sky in this world was rapscallion purple
illuminated by rapid pinks
underscored by reluctant blue
the meta-man gestured heavenwards n proclaimed
the accident was planned
the plan has gone awry
one little part of the scheme is off the beam
it would seem
hey wiseman dont sling me no jive i sneered
ive come here for some answers
you see way up there in the big world
well people are floundering in a sea of nescience
drowning in uncertainty
the gossip mags the fluoro lites
the sirloin stakes thru their hearts
their veins clogged with thickening muck
the residue of the beasts fear
how can they hope to know….?
war pestilence famine death
same old same old but suddenly new
what can you do?
what can i do?
here the meta-man paused
and his 3rd eye was fixed on my soul
you, like dante
have journeyed deep into the abysm
you have fallen small among us
and then
a trapdoor in the pavement opened up
and a hand handed him a note
the note said
please tell steven kilbey
he left home today without his lunch!
i was filled with dread
sitting in the darkish classroom while a storm raged outside
with all the other kids
i could smell that banana-ey lunch box smell
as the kids took out their sandwiches
mm jam sandwiches said wendy fuller
i groped the little buckles on my satchel
but my heart dropped as i found it devoid of lunch
suddenly my dad appeared
in his suit
framed in the doorway of the classroom
looking oh ever so handsome
steven kilbey! calls out mrs mcginnis
and im so happy that my dad is here with my lunch..
but dad takes me out into the empty corridor
we hear the rain tap tap tap on the iron roof
the windows awash with water reveal a stormy afternoon
listen says dad
im not really yer dad
im that meta-man sent here
to fetch you
cos youve drifted off on a tangent
take my hand…..
no i like it here i cried and backed away down the corridor
you cant stay here said the meta-man
its 1960…..
i went n sat back down with the other kids
but everything was silent
there werent any kids
only their shadows
the rain had stopped
the lights faded down

48 Responses to “dont look here….the jokes in your hand”

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