ok
wear yer makeup then anonymouses who shall remain nameless
you know i aint talking about a bitta eyeliner
i wore as a performer
or the pancake i wore as shylock in the merchant of venus
and while im here
to the idiot who criticised me
for not taking care of the dog in the storm
the dog was already surrounded by the driver and its owners
sorry i didnt spell it out for ya
i thought you may have presumed that i would have helped
the dog if there hadnt been anyone there
its a given….or what
makeup schmakeup
pile it on you silly bints
im just talking about the gloop that covers yer whole face
and cracks into yer wrinkles n pores
and makes you look like a fright
go ahead
its a done deal
sometimes i feel like these little gremlins poring thru this blogge
looking for any un pc deviation or some thing to contradicto
or coming on like theyre some olde gurlfrend of mine
(i never met ya!)
or some olde wise “inside” person who wryly sadly
points out the ‘orrible truth about your saintly being
like he was there when ploogy got sacked
or whatever
jesus get real
this is the diary of a space rocker
oh yeah
some other goose
says i dont like makeup
cos im olde
and it would make me look like a sad old clown
but this is what i secretely want AND need
madame
have you been fucking following this at all
do you reckon some olde bloke like me
with a big white beard
dressed in shorts n boots
is jealous of “the young”
cos i wanta a bright colourful face?
lady
my red nose
my grey eyes
my brown freckles
my golden tan
my black white brown n blonde beardy
does it sound like i need more colour in my face
do you really think im longing for my pretty youth
maybe you are
but i aint
i dont care if you believe it or not
lady i live in the everflowing present
i got more balls now than that prick who was me ever dreamed of
you think im gonna sacrifice that for a pretty face and big hair
no no
thats you
superficial ones
dont project yer silly wishes on me
dont attribute yer longing for someone elses glory daze on me
and i know my regular readers enjoy a good rant
so im just blowing off some steam for their amusement
at my deep still centre i am unruffled
you better believe it
and anyway
why are you looking for truth n wisdom on a internet diary
of a self confessed washed up drug addled crazy olde rocker
sometimes i wonder how it woulda been if the great writers
of the past had had blogs and commenters

jrr tolkiens blog
morgoth was defeated
and cast into a deep pit
his servant sauron was captured
and the elves held him fast
but he pretended to be rehabilitated
and they were deceived and gave him freedom
he made rings which he gave to man elf and dwarf
but he made a master ring
which he saved for himself
and his power over them grew
he was lord of the rings
see ya tomorrow
love
jrr

comments
anonymous said
morgoth was innocent
is this racism against a balrog?
tolkien=hitler!

anonymous said
thats it
im never reading this blog again
look im leaving
look im gone
just checking….
one last time then….

anonymous said
hey jrr
remember me
im that girl who was with c.s. that night in oxford
yeah you should remember….you lil devil!
from oooh that would be telling

anonymous said
ive seen tolkien in action
a friend of mine
a publisher got burnt by him bad
he aint no gentleman jim
dont be fooled
hes a bastard

anonymous said
hey jrr
tell us more about those cute little hobbits
they make me n my wife laugh….

nick fantasy-fiction said
hey tolkers
why dontcha jus chill?

anonymous said
tolkien
i know where you live!
a.n orc

anonymous said
bullshit!

anonymous said
i used to like your books
but this is too much
i thought you were smarter than this
but i guess i was wrong
from disappointed

anonymous said
“in mordor where the shadows lie”
whos in shadow now, jrr?
from guess who

etc etc etc
do you get the picture
look i know 95 per cent of my comments are positive
and everytime someone says something really nice
and heartfelt
i cringe cos i know some smarmy little worm is out there
getting ready to sneer
cos they cant tell the difference between affection and affectation
they cant see that you appreciate me and what i do
and how much i appreciate some kind words
i dont live for it
but verily
i do appreciate an intelligent informed bit of praise
fandorin for example
who i have met
in prague of all intellectual pretentious places
and he could tell you why he liked your record
in such an eloquent thoughtful way
that it made me wanna run
to whatever he was talking/writing about
and chuck it on the headphones
and say
“oh i wanna hear all that marvellous stuff hes hearing”
with other people a simple i love this will suffice
however you wanna say it
if you wanna say it
what kind of idiot would i be
if i had amassed this huge (in rock terms) body of work
and wasnt happy if folks liked it
i like it when the ladies still think im ok
i like it when the younger guys say you aint too badde f’ran olde guy
i like it when people like me
aint that natural
so i resent it when someone gets called a sicko phant
just because they liked something i did
sometimes i think what do they want from me
i churn out something here everyday
you dont have to pay
(but if you wanna..i had bad economic news)
and please if you wanna imply something
why dontcha put yer name?
you know mine….
who the fuck are you?