posted on October 29, 2012 at 6:35 pm

wasnt that a dainty dish to set before the king?

deep weariness sets in

sleep insists that i lie down

my heaviness as gravity takes hold

my face against a pillow like a thousand tons

i ache to close down

morning come and gone again

our shop closed down

soft rain begins

hushed breathless in the crook of dawn

the sun to rise out of the sea

i alone in sleep entangled

the waves stop pounding the shore

the bird leaves off his singing

the trees silently singing off their leaves

i am merged in slumber though somehow aware

i wander thru the houses of my lives

in spain in chicago in norway in broome

take away this pain i will follow you anywhere

i was in one of my meaningless songs

i was a verse that didnt rhyme

i was a sour note amongst the orchestral stabs

i was a burnt bridge to an isolated chorus

i was alone alright

everyone had left me

i woke up in a freezing cold room i didnt recognize

i woke up crying and bawling neither in one place or the other

something had changed in the world while i slept

my own mind has whipped up this malevolence against me

trapped in my body my brain subjected me to a constant barrage

i sort through my things

i trudge up the stairs

the hammering clock

the bursting mains

the crackling power

the carpet burns my eye

the mirror hangs like a man

the slow motion frame of its reflection

another sea sparkles in its distances

another sky bluer and truer

i step into the shower of agonizing wetness

the water rips my skin and leaves me just a dream shivering

anyway i got nowhere to go in a dream or a song

no bills to pay nothing to arrange

a car pulls up we drive to a airport

no one says a word i sit in the soft comfort

we whirl through the cities with the stars and the malls

on outskirts of paris lost on a map

the dawn at the window pale and sickly

the dawn at the door eluded by you

the dawn at the station where a few ghosts have gathered

the dawn on a road where emptiness travels

the dawn when youre out on the street alone

when nobody knows you and nobody feeds you and nobody sees you

when nobody offers you  land or a throne

the dawn struggles at first taking tiny rosy steps

no i must wake up now

no i must sleep some more

then im on a plane hurtling thru icy clouds

i’m pinned to my chair having a scare

oh jesus save me i whisper

and the sky becomes peaceful

but when we land i never thank him or mention my gratitude

a voice says

the sky would have become calm anyway…

then my bag has gone missing…

sweet buddha dont lemme lose my bag i say

and then suddenly it turns up alright

i forget to thank him

and a voice says

it would have turned up on its own..

a car waits for me

it is the new dawn here

the dawn of all things in this place

i have flown so long chasing this dawn

dawn of seagulls dawn of cool breezes

dawn of pines dawn of sands

dawn of minute bites

car speeds on through dawn

i doze in the back

a female companion holds my hand

no i am still alone

i jerk awake

i am asleep in a hotel foyer

my neck hurts

the elevator wont work

i trudge up the stairs

someone opens a door

someone hands me a key

i yawn again

i awake in the car driving through the dawn

the dawn has grown stronger

the dawn almost now the day

my brain is engulfed in nausea

my stomach is numb and empty

the boat is leaving with sleep up on it

i long for bed for warm anonymity

i long for oblivion the end of all troubles

i long for some softest angel to anoint me with love

i long for the formulae to untangle myselves

the truth is fragile

the truth is evolving

the truth is a car crash from ten different angles

the truth is a memory you never had

the truth is

i’m tired



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