you are unreachable
time and time again
mornings come and go
childhoods drift into age
the years yawn and are gone
one day this
next day that
if you only had perspective
if you could see the shadows the littlest things cast
i dont want to turn into this thing im becoming
but its in the stars
the celestial bodies pulling us here n there
the gravity of our times
the sheer weighed up bags of moments
the dazzling sunlight
the foggiest night
already bewildered suffering these attacks
you return again n again
here is a haven for travellers i have heard
where weary wayfarers find rest
there is a way into its centre
there is room there
living room
mirrors talking back
paintings follow you round
the statuettes gyre n gimble
the masks grinning from ear to here
i didnt want to end up here either
in the sun on my deck chair
feeding the birdies
and whistling for my supper
they switched off the clocks
they turned the calendars upside down
and now night comes before day
and day comes before night
its peaceful i must say
at least
im crazy but im calm
im jealous n bitter as all hell
but somehow these waving fields soothe me and
somehow the margins have contained me
somehow the things i need elude me
one day you wake up….
or one night you go to sleep…
and after that
when it all goes……
wrong is such a strong word…..
when it all goes differently to what youd thought
what youd banked on happening
when you get a 3 instead of a king
or you end up in the lane going the other way
sailing past your home doing a hundred
or you realise youre watching the wrong film
hey ! this aint what i thought it was
i want my time and my money back
i wanna retrial n a misprint
i wanna easy sentence handed down
i wanna minimum security universe
and i want weekend conjugal visits and
i want to escape almost before im in
and then i regret even before i have begin
and then i feel finished
finished
null n voided
over n out
and as it all grinds to a halt
one little spark
starts to glow
and you think
oh no
i thought it was all extinguished
but no
little spark fanned by your very breath
and hope against hope
but failure
inertia
silence
darkness
beckon