inner city bar
mr w sits in the back room
you play poker he asks
he grabs your lips and squeezes them together
he brushes your arm with his bad hand
opens a coke
in the silent room you can hear it fizzing
baby sits by his side
i’d hate to ever hurt you she said
a cat screams outside in an alley
cars pull up n drive off
cockroaches sprint from one greasy corner to the next
rats sleep in the walls
the first card falls
the queen of hearts
that must be baby
sweet baby face
little babycino
your brain scrambles madly
queen of hearts
the red cells
the blue cells
the tireless aorta ever beating
monarch of blood engorged dirty drum
squeezing that bloody ichor round your body
queen of heart-ache
baby smiles distantly
the second card falls
jack of diamonds
is that me
diamonds are forever baby said
baby gave me 2 white diamond shaped pills
diamonds are a girls best friend she said
i had swallowed them doubtfully
they stuck in my chest and their bitter taste scorched my throat
the jack of all trades…wasnt that just like me
a real jack ass someone else said behind a desk
the third card fell
of course
the fucking joker!
it was mr w’s card
everyone there laughed
i relax my grip on my chair
my armpits are gushing ice cold sweat
my stomach feels empty and sick
my feet are frozen
my teeth chatter faintly
keep still ! hisses a cruel voice
maybe we should take a ride baby said
she had been lying on her stomach
looking back at me and all her past
the motel had a little balcony
someone had filmed us as she stood at the edge
i was kneeling down behind
baby was smoking and sighing with pleasure
it had only been hours ago
maybe the clock had stopped
baby had slipped off her pants
she was just laying there
do whatever you like …someone said
…but be careful… whispered a tremulous voice at my ear
a bright light was shining in my eye
any reaction said cop # 1
this ones dead said cop#2
i wanted to scream out i couldnt move
a crowd of people gathered round
cmon folks, move along said a voice
it was mr weirds soft chuckle as he said it
i felt hands on me
baby was sitting on my knee kissing him
oh boy i said and they all had a good laugh
you dont look so good said one of babys friends
i was perspiring and feverish
i was moving against baby persistently
lets have a look at you said mr weird
i was on the passengers side
baby was in the back lying on her stomach again
the radio emitted a newsflash
a floodwarning
the rain at that very moment fell
nobodys driving whispered that same voice at my ear
cop#1 was digging a grave
cop#2 was smoking a rum-dipped cigar when the rain began
hey gimme a fucking hand here says #1
they lower mr weird down
down down down
it was a long way down
in total blackness he was sleeping
down by the river in a little grove of trees
no baby baby said
you were having a bad dream
shes straddling my chest and looking down
i’m trying to climb out of the earth
you was wrong about that one says cop#1
baby wake up says baby
i feel her hands miles away pulling me out
dont pull me out baby not yet says that whispery voice
mr weird takes out a five gram bag of white powder
put this on him he says to someone off camera
cop #2 tastes the powder
well whaddya know he says
baby cuts out a line on a mirror
she rolls up a note
i lay down my hand
the cop wipes the dirt of his spades
the diamonds work inside me
rubbing together incessantly
mr weird tours the clubs
and theres baby with my broken hearts
baby wriggling on her stomach like a little white serpent
baby my lovely constrictor
baby who can swallow you down
whats he got? someone asks
king high nothing….someone suggests
are you bluffing ?says baby over her shoulder
he aint bluffing….are you says mr weird-o
his breath is like vanilla cookies
his eyes never focus on anything
he talks at me not to me
if you gonna do it just do it baby said
yeah do it! said some bored voice
let me adjust these lights said cop #1
we want people to know whos behind all this
i stand in a line-up
which of these men is responsible for this ?says cop#2
baby walks up n down the line
she kisses all the guys in the line up in front of me
then when she gets in front of me she says
thats him!
the cops chuckle
i knew it! says #2
mr weird throws in his hand
beats me he says
you mean i’m free to go… ? i ask
no one answers
the phone rings
its babys voice
just go… it says
over and over