posted on June 14, 2011 at 4:43 pm

the panther in winter (figurative and literal)

oh lioness do not forget your pride

he whispered the words to a song he knew into the vast grey sky

the day was leaden

the sun a dim white blur off somewhere

all his thoughts were brilliant but fleeting

bewilderness years indeed

an inbuilt sense of morality had failed

time was constantly running out as it had in its timeless way

a wise man in love is a fool down inside

his mind presented him vague axioms

a way to live his life

by the time he would discover the golden rule

the game would be in time-on then

the things he excelled at became better n better

the flaws n faults got worse and worse

the way the years had altered him surprised him

the good things held him together

the bad things pulled him apart

as they were in equal measure he remained therein

in the cancelling out of each other he had achieved a lift off

he perceived the paradox in everything

he lecherously coveted chastity

he did not hesitate to dither

an anxiety-less state made him really worry

in the midst of his turmoil he was calm

he often hated love and loved to hate

he couldnt wait so he started waiting

the concrete facts of our normal world warped in his head

he could see the bizarre in everything normal

it seemed normal to him to be bizarre

he had eavesdropped on citizens who had been intriguing him

he had committed a crime to discover a worse one within

as he read and interpreted the information

never intended for him to see

shocked by what he had uncovered

guilty as an interloper

he was fascinated and repulsed at the data encoded here

the 2 most deadly sins anger and lust

metamorphed in angry lust and lustful anger

marvel of treachery and bravado and stupidity

oh here was something important to solving the equation

how little he had known of these citizens of his

how surprising people can really be in their predictable fashion

man into pig woman into turkey

people getting their fucking lines from le jerry springer show

people getting their numbers from a puddle

people getting their nightmares tattooed in black n white

people plotting an attack on themselves

ha the enemy was always the same looming omnipresent threat

the threat of more threats…was that a paradox or just dopiness…?

some of it made no perfect sense

was that a mixed metaphor or some key unlocking satori…?

he tried to digest what he was seeing

his eyes were like a stomach then

and his brain seethed in its own bile and spleen

the nazarene the grooviest of all had opined

evil thought was much worse than poisonous food

now his head was filled with these others not even his

the lurid banality of every fucking thing

the sheer drop into a bitter negation of  soul

the fury invoked at elemental levels

the brutes and tramps that live within us half-bidden

the traitor in the skin of a friend

idiot within genius within idiot ad nausea infinitum

the fascination of deep repulsion was a truth to conquer

the magnetism of disgust

the way the wrong thing inexorably always goes the wrong way

the citizens were selling each other and themselves down a black river

it was so obvious that nothing good comes from anything bad

that no one not he could  see it

this most confidential information my friends thus rendered useless

obtained by deceit to expose deceit

trespass upon traitor to intrude upon a wide open door

inside you find what you wished to have known

but once you will know you will wish to forget

but forgetting is not the easiest thing

and everybody has their own price

and whether you pay in flesh or in gold

and whether you play by any rules at all

i mean why not just do anything…?

when your inner sense of good and evil

is not directed by the satellite of love and mercy

every where the plotters are adoring you

and their ceilings are flooring you

when you understand only half of the story

every now and then the protagonists and antagonists

falling out of character they reveal dismal disappointing emptiness

and your ardent enjoyment suddenly withers as you read the pages

the clarity

it has brought more murkiness …yes it has!

the insight leaves you blind

the sudden gush of discovery gives way to the long labour of regret

the sky becoming darker darker

the sound of the oceans white thunder fades

and its time for you to again enter the next stage







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