posted on February 14, 2007 at 7:29 pm

stabbing in the dark
billy franklin shut down his neurotine fountain
bad science fiction always made him cringe
and this wasnt gonna be any different
god i hate all those conjunctive pseudo-bullshit words
he said wiping the preda-tour from his chrypto- puce
franklin
as you may remember
is your futuristick magickal uber-agent
working for a cabal of tycoons n millionaires
intent on subverting “reality”
franklin is gaunt n wasted
his thin air plastered against his scalp
like steerpike on meth-analog
or like andre breton on neo-pix
or like robert the bruce on shreddy-mones minus the fucking kilt
or like apollo mc god on ambrosia dipped purple heads
yeah franklin is a cool cool cat
hes got nine lives too
one for the flaming sun
2 for the location
3 for the martyrs and the etc etc etc
billy franklin always gets a 5 star review too
for all his music/chrymes
franklin is the laydees man
franklin is the last word in hideo-cute
he hunts down carnivores n picks em off with his appender
nothing funny than a flesho out of phase with himself
franklin dont care
they been warned
franklin hadda laugh
a cannister of clean air was now more expensive
than a bottle of clean water
i mean you could still breathe the “free” air
but everynow n then you hadda pop a can of kleen-heir
or yer lungsd give up the ghosting
ever since china n india had become chindia
everytime franklin took a deep breath
he could hear his lungs straining n weezing
trying to find any stray oxy-gen in there
todays assignment: the time being
21 st century blogger n spacerocker
the being had seen it coming way way way back
the 1970s…can you credit that ?
but then in 2007 came the beings crisis of faith
where hed come to a fork in the road
and the being had chosen the nonexistent middle way
deserted by his protogees n disciples
lost in a roman wilderness of pain
for 40 days n nights
tormented by grotesque visions
tempted by the deville
now manifested as a big fat aussie show biz exec
maaate dont ya wanna make some real munnie?
asked the tasteless buffooon
his safari suit open to reveal a leo pendant on his hairy chest
the devilles beer n wine gut hung over his calf-leather belt
and upon his fingers flashed ostentatious gold
maate all ya gotta do is play unguarded moment n eat this
he pushed over a barrel of mc chicken-knuckles
he pulled out a copy of “the charts”
it wasnt just the music charts
the deville had the charts on everything
who was making the most money
who was getting the most sex
who was taking the most drugs
who was living in the nicest house in vaucluse
who was listening to the most hip n obscure music
who was envied most
who stuff was coveted most
whos image was the most copied
who was the most enlightened
who was the most young looking olde guy
who was the most holier than thou
it was all there
an index of where you stood
now he offered the being the world
get thee behind me seitan muttered the being
but the lord of evil was not thru
maate remember how ya used to sell out 2 nights at the enmore?
maate remember how ya used to stay at the poshmore hilton in vaucluse?
and how ya always had a ford waitin for ya at the heir-porte
and ya started with a fuckin falcon n then
i took ya up to a forte
n then a futura
then a fairmont
then a fuckin fairlane
then finally
a LTD
maate you were drivin round in a LTD!
the devilles alcohol swollen veins popped in his face
whats fuckin wrong with ya maaate
you coulda haddit all
you had the loox
you had the choons
you had a grate banned….
my 7th wife n i danced to unguarded moment
at my # 6s beheading n our wedding
the old deville belched a sulphorous !
scuse me mate
ive gotta fuckin ulcer!
missus served up chicken vindaloo
n i feel crook…
have you thought of a vegan diet?
asked the thoughtful being
mee….naaah…im the deville aint i
you cant have a vegan deville can ya?
well why not? offered that pleasant being in his melodious voice
well…began the dev
suddenly he exploded in anger
look i just like the taste…ok?
sure said that handsome calm being
the deville said
how olde art thou being?
verily replied the radiant being
i am 52 summers
no fuckin way groaned the deville
as he eyed his flowing chins n greying flesh
he held his bulging belly n his knees creaked
im only fuckin thirty nine…
the deville stopped and the room grew silent
suddenly franklin burst thru the door
he was naked…all timetravel must be naked
franklin stared at devilles buxsome gorgeous vegan secretary
hey honey do ya like time travel…?
the security men burst thru the door levelling their salami guns
at the being n franklin
and the sprinkler system went off
the infra red alarms went off too
and the whole place was breaking up
the being ,franklin n the naked secretary
ran thru the now cracking apart building
take them
take them
screamed the dev
his men all crack shots
could not seem to hit our hero
the 3 fled out a secret passageway
that ran under a nuclear playstation
suddenly they came to a sheer drop
the ocean crashed around rocks far below
the devilles men were on their trail
there was only one thing left to do
(to be continued)

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