i search myself and i find myself wanting

wanting more of this wanting less of that

the sun spent last night shining brightly somewhere else

but laziness and i are in cahoots

tragedies rip chunks from a dwelling

great unasked for honours prop up tottering beams

daughter aurora whom i named in song 9 years before birth

she of all my children

with her olive hued skin

her hair the colour of shifting sand

her eyes are old navaho woman

her mind from a former time

the present confuses and bemuses her

she cant quite remember her great gift and…….

an affinity for magic and myth

she fills up on it and then cannot abide her real worlds

feeling persecuted by unnameable forces

sometimes her disdain comes back and bites her

is she a celt is she an indian is she a persian is she a moor ?

her vaunted intelligence makes everything vapid

a fish out of water

a girl out of time

a fruit on a vine

but the same old zeitgeist the one who keeps changing

the spirit is attractive

its hard to ignore him

after all we all must live in our times

why yearn towards the past realms of magic 

when ive one million tricks up one million sleeves ?

and quick as a flash i’m trotting out novelties 

and gossips and weddings and gadgets and clothes

the never ending present is a great fatigue

to those who long for future and past

i took my longing and made it the subject

for almost every song that i ever will write

its a thrill that aches its like a warm chill

youve seen paradise and here is your bill

i guess that last line means i got too much time to kill

i admire that quiet man with his house on the hill

his garden so lush his window so still

i didnt think about it until……

a poem has tried to high jack my reverie

the things that i right here in strictly no confidence

i am your internet conscience as the nights go a’sliding

i am revealed gradually as the years go on hiding

man time is rushing like never before

reversing all that you hate and adore

you all love me once and love me no more

the wind sings a symphony i ask whats the score

in tatters the battered fish on the shore

my close from last night that lay on the floor

and drugs coursing through all of the veins at full bore

look i’m lifting off  now …what you standing there for…..?

i only want more and i only want more…..

reality convenes an intervention

one day you come home

and there sit all your fears anxieties and doubts

reality has decided you must play it straight

reality wants to be embraced

your fears need assuaging

your anxieties need soothing

your doubts need reassurance

reality suggests somewhere between everything else

reality lies a way

if you create your own reality…..

why only a devil would then create this hell

and what kind of god would design sweet eden

and kick out his angel

who loved it so well

god  flooded the world to wash away sin

devil flooded hell with his tears to begin

man is lost without and lost within

god with his mane

devil with his fin

god with his spear

devil with his pin

god with his out

devil with his in

god with his law

devil with his spin

god with his methadone

devil with his heroin

god with his platinum

devil with his tin

i say all of this

i love you in spades

sincerely sincerely

off now to hades