my darling fiends
children of the night
oh ive been having a lovely time
i been out in the swedish countryside
with elli n minna
and karin n gorm
and adrian n ossian
about 2 hours from stockholm
is elli n minnas “torp”
a swedish country house
no electricity
no running water
just peace n quiet
a deep cold black lake full of fish
snakes making love in the rocks
birds calling in the trees
mosquitoes biting all day n night
i get my own little “stuga”
a kinda cottage
with a view of the lake
the trees, the reeds a’swayin’ in the soft zephyrs
the green grass
the profusion of flowers
the aromatic pine trees
yes
s.w. eden indeed
if only
natalie n evie n aurora n baby bouncer
could have been there
things woulda been damn well as perfect as things get
in this world
imagine
no tv
no computers
no cars
no noise
listen says gorm
a million mosquitoes a’humming in the woods
i hardly begrudge em their feasting on my english blood
the long long twilights
the stillness at dawn
wisps of mists blowing on the lake
the first morning i awake
i go down on my knees in spontaneous prayer
to the perfect god
for this beautiful creation
everything in balance
was life like this in the garden ?
the weather is warm
golden days
azure skies filled with delicate clouds
messages to us if we could decipher them
we eat all our meals outdoors in the garden
grilled soy sausages n salads
and delicious swedish “saft”
like cordials made with natural fruits n berries
i swim in the the lake
refreshing cold water
basking on the rocks in the sun
like a snake myself
boats go by festooned with flowers n swedish flags
the people call out to me
ar det kallt in vattnet
is it cold in the water
nej! jag ropar tillbaka
no i shout back
hoppa i da
hop in then
i jump in and they all clap my derring-do
i swim to the other side of the lake
half a mile away
totally isolated i take off my icebergs swimmers
and stand naked n triumphant
part of nature at last
watching the small miracles of life
the ants n the lizards
the little schools of fish
oh i wish EVERYONE in the world
could stand here
naked n alone
just me n the trees n the breeze
the glass like lake
i feel so close to god
so hard to believe that somewhere out there
theres traffic n arguments n civilization
i want to stay here forever
i see a pair of birds lovingly swoop n bank
flying n gliding for the sheer joy of it
yes fiends
im very priveleged to be here
i appreciate that
i feel guilty almost to have moments like this
of pure peace
of understanding
of being part of things
no longer a human bean
just another creature taking in the wonder of it all
in my little stuga i do my yoga routine
i read my novel
(veniss underground by j vandameer, highly rec.)
i wish i had my paints n pastels so i could try to capture this
this weather dont last long
3 months at the most
but while its here it is simply MAGNIFICENT
words actually fail me to convey
the serenity
the harmony
i do the washing up n
i strap on my ipod and listen to mimesis
and born to run
as i happily “diskar” outdoors
huge black bumblebees hover in the flowers
small bugs crawl on the table
released temporarily from winter
everything under the spell of summer
karin n gorm potter round doing their chores
the twillies laze around in the sun
getting slightly sunburnt
we drink crystal clear water from a well
we eat swedish cracker bread n tartex
at night i lie in my stuga
dreaming strange dreams of other lifetimes
in the eternal light
it never gets dark
you wake up in the morning
it could be 3 oclock or 7 oclock or 9 oclock
my overactive mind gradually slows down
i become calm
i feel love for everything
even the wasps n nettles
even the stones n mud
this is, at last, the quietness
my ego becomes quite bored and shuts down
good riddance
i just take it all in
hoping to remember stuff
so i can type it all into my blogge
cos i wanna share it with ya
cos its too goode to keep it all to myself
if only the doodles were playing in the grass
if only me n nk could walk these tranquil forests
arm in arm, talking n laughing
i guess ya cant always have everything
eventually we have to pack up n leave
g and k have work tomorrow
and we gonna see ellis doctor
see how he thinks everything is going
but a lovely chance to be with my older girls
who i adore (naturally)
whatever happens after this
i have burned these memories into my hard drive
i will remember this even in my next lives
on friday i leave again for australia
that makes me happy n sad
life is a paradox
a dilemma
i think of all my blessings
even the blessings in disguise
if only this earth could have been like this forever n ever
no winter
no industrial revolution
no wars
no noise
just one never ending summer day in scandanavia
the lake
the sky
the creatures
fiendss
i love you all
behave yerselves
lets speak again tomorrow
sk