posted on July 14, 2006 at 2:36 am

fifteen bushells of fun @ blah blah blah
three furlongs of fury @ blah blah blah
21 moments of eternity @blah blah blah
seven and half hundredweight of wait @blah blah blah
would like to deduct all monies pertaining to pam n perry potter
due to extraordinary circumstances, mercury in retrograde etc
i hereby acknowledge the real purpose of all this is to love each other
and have good haircuts n drive a nice car
actually a good set of gulf clubs wouldnt hurt
and the gucci shoetree
where was i?
im waiting for a guy to interview me
but he’s either late
or confused as to what time it is here..
hopefully he wont ring at 3 am
the pool was very turbulent today
it smelt of fish and drowned sailors
the water slapped you round
like an angry wet mother
i got seasick just tryin’ to do my laps
in the sauna a russian dude
tryin to get the sauna nice n scalding
chucked half a gallon of eucalyptus spiked water
on the hot rocks
sending out a roiling wave of steam
which nigh on peeled off my beard, eyebrows n eyelases
such was its intensity
a moment later the steam hit my long sufferin’ lungs
like a punch in the guts
or seeing your sweetheart in the arms of a. nother
or getting yer credit card cut in 2 in kathmandu
insert own thing here
i have spring in my stride
tho my status is stricktly autumnal
i am endeavouring to remember everything
seasons of wither, fiendss
but the golden clean air of los angeles
will no doubt rejuvynate me
i’ll be young again in no time flat
i’ll be the old me before i was the olde me
i’ll turn back that clock as i prowl down hollywood blvde
callin’ out hey la
sk is back!
cmon la
we were made for each other
you need an undieground type like me
to inject some fuckin’ pizazz into yer sorry carcass
you will have access to my brain for 1 million bucks a day
(and it’ll take ya years to rummage round in there)
so book me a nice hotel now
nothing fancy
you know round the 5k a nite mark
i hope theres a chauffeur at the airport
with a big sign saying nevets yeblik
with a nice peaked cap and polished buttons
and i hope in the limo
is a bottle of champers n a cigar
n a copy of the latest billboard n financial times
n we’ll do dinner at some cuisine nouveau joint
that chuck a bean on yer plate
and dare ya to complain
and they said marty cant come in cos he hadda hole in his jeans
and you, l.a., said i own this fuckin’ restaraunt
and then we were in a car driving between melbourne n adelaide
in 1982
on the coast road
in the forest next to the sea
richard was in the back rolling away
kangaroos hoppin’ out of the darkness all the time
and it was so dark and so quiet
when we stopped
and ummagumma stopped in the cassette player
in the ford fairlane
and the prehistoric forest with all its storeys
n stories
the violent day to day life of the beasts
the unseen carnage
ants versus termites
birds versus snakes
the wind versus the soil
the night versus the day
suddenly remembered something
in the stillness of this national park forest
the last gig still ringing in my ears
having a piss in the blackness
smokin’ yet another reefer
the night silenced our chatter
which was
mainly about if such n such
was so n sos best album or not
or where we were on some chart
and how bloody rude it was that we werent higher up
than that
and which op shops we were gonna hit
on the way to adder laid
in the springtime of life
sweet burred of yoof
paisley shirts?
i hadda mountain of em
who was digging all this?
someone out there i guess
theyll all come out of the wouldwork
when its time for them to come on the stage of my life
the forest drips in the night
its air is cool n sweet
i love forests fiends
i love forests

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