posted on December 11, 2005 at 12:41 am

yo peeeeeeple
alright
sunday morning in bondi
the internet cafe nearly empty cept for me
and some bleary eyed german backpacker
just had me brekky
sausage dog woke up scarlet
krallman had a machiato
nk bought 2 coffees to take home
eve and aurora had pancakes
ah the ordinary and the extraordinary
very few of the people at the cafe realise
that the dude in the black hat and white beardy
is a rocknroll superstah
about to tread the boards in only a few more hours
uh oh ahhh missy higgy on the radio
weakness in muscles
dark fog in mah brain
ah make it stop
ah make it go away
maudlin girlie mushiness invading ole sks neurons
ahhh no…cant take much more
syrupy schmaltzy tripe ascending mah cortex
must focus on bloggy….
must blot out this assault on my sensibilities
ah no sinking in fourth form gurlie poetry
NO
NO
NO!!!!!!
i will not succumb….
thank god
its over
collectin’ mah thoughts
can i be right and the whole world wrong?????

anyway
tonite
cautious, my felons
my fine feathered finks
my choichy little chickens
my anons
my avid and ardent amours
phew
poor sk
so sensitive to horrible sounds
so delicate mah poor ears
so much terrible noise around
IS THERE ANYTHING YOU LIKE YOU GRUMPY OLDE BASTARD?
IS THERE ANY FUCKIN MUSIC YOU LISTEN TO…….?
oh sk, isnt it lonely up here
here in yer tower where you guard the true rock heritage
here in yer brain where you still struggle to inject meaning
into a meaningless pop rock hodge podge
will they ever reward you sk?
will there be a shady grove at the end of your long trail?
will you ever be inducted into the heaven of olde rockers
put out to pasture
enjoying yer twilight years in the sun?
or is it just an endless struggle against the forces of syrup
against the horrible eighties dross of franz fuckin ferdinand
against the jet
against the backstreet bouys
against all those ten million girlie singers
against the hordes of rappers
against the grain
against the flow
against the wind
(SEE THEM CHOICHBOUYS RIDIN’ AGAINST THE WIND)
you see, the day i was born
an angel said to my muvver, (JOYCIE)
(WHO CANT COME ON THIS SITE COS SHE CANNAE ABIDE THE FOOKIN LANGWIDGE)
the angel said
this wee chile you hold in yer arms will one day be the saviour of
rocknroll
he will soldier on with his velvety voice
with his white beardy
with his freckles and earrings
armed only with ye olde basse
armed only with three f maj 7 chords
and the TRUTH!!!!!!
and lo, he will play the newt town twice
AND IT WILL BE GOODE
FOR THOSE WHO HAVE EARS TO HEAR
TO THOSE WHO HAVE BANK CARDS TO BUY CHURCH MURCH
TO THOSE WHO HAVE BACKSTAGE PASSES AND COCAINE
yes, go forth proudly
for this weee chile will teach us how to ROCK!
but he will rock without forsaking intelligence
he will rock without forsaking meaning
and literary devices
(DIDJA KNOW THERE WERE 7 TYPES OF AMBIGUITY….?
AND THE CHOICH KNOWS MOST OF EM)
and the angel sprinkled moondust in mah hair
and golden sunlight in mah eyes of grey

any way, i digress
i digress, my little whoppers w/cheese
i digress my soy lattes with raw sugar
i digress my wheat toasts with apricot conserves

uh oh im digressing helplessly here
and im spoilin’ ya with mah huge daily blog
you guys….!
you guys are gonna have to learn to get by with less
i cant give ya this much everyday
i gotta go home and play barbies with the kiddiwinks
i gotta go home and chop down a christmas tree
i gotta go home and scrub my basse guitar
and learn my fuckin scales
i gotta go home and warm up ye olde velvety deep voice
so tonite
so tonite
i can hardly type it without getting all misty…
so tonite that ye may rocke
so tonite ye may rolle
so tonite ye may twitch and stomp
and have a rockingly goode time
youll see me there tonite
i have propitiated Indra, no storms tonite
i have spoken to Vishnu
who is sks main man
and he said to me
(in sanskrit, which i mysteriously understood)
he said
oh sk
oh you noble and still handsome olde rocker
go to the newt town
and let your people know
it is ok to rock again
only by rockin shall ye be healed
and forget
the bills
the jobs
the politician wurms
the fuckin neighbours and their yappy lil sausage dog
the deadlines
the morons crowding ya in
the nay sayers
the big brothers
the schmaltzy syrupy fuckin tripe thats breakin ya down
the retro oafish swaggering pea brains
the poofy scotch rubbish
the country and weston drivel
the bouy bands and the gurl bands
the aor adult contemporary bullshit
and all the rest

yes sk
tonite
TONITE YOU WILL ROCK
(!)
thats all folks

22 Responses to “the tomb of the unknown blog”

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