posted on August 22, 2008 at 11:03 pm

sydney lashed by violent storms
the rain comes rushing in diagonally
the palms weird in the grey light
people huddle under awnings
puddles form in the mornings
natalie lies sleeping in bed all warm n aromatic
scarlet lies on a cushion in my room
curled up and slightly sad about something
she comes and sits on my lap
muttering something softly
she finds a headless figurine which happens to be on my desk
she regards it with big blue sad eyes
is it any good now her heads gone ? i say
she shakes her big head and gently sets it down
last night dublin frank n janice n marlon
came over for a minestrone soup
ricki rene maymi was also on hand
i was being tested
frank keeps teling me
that crunchie and violet crumble bars are the same
this is the sort of heresy you’d expect from a gaelic type
all puffed up on euros and leprechaun carving grants
but anyway i had set him straight
they are completely different i said
give me the blindfold taste test
so after soupy n salad
out came crunchie bar n violet crumble bar
i was blindfolded
yes yes
come on
and voila
they give me a bit
its crunchie
it dissolves in the mouth all sugary
yep thats a crunchie i say
next i get the violet crumble
its all chewy the chocolates different everything
thats the crumble i say
a big cheer
of course i was right
and you shouldnt bet on a certainty
no one else could get the taste test right
including the wild n glamourous rocker maymi
who couldnt tell a crunchie from a crumble if it bit his ass
the kids all tried
but were more interested in just eating the candy
frank himself tried
got it wrong
and said
theyre completely different
aint that just like a bloody irishman
nk refused the blindfold on the basis it might mess up her hair-do
and scarlet was peeping
and she didnt know or care
she just wanted some more chocky
ricki n frank then went off to jlks
to prepare a future esoteric music club track
and i tried to get tibor the falcon outta the drive
but some idiots had parked us in
janice n young marlon had to walk home
i backed tibor down the drive all angry in the dark
and probably reversed over all the flowers
(down the side of this house this smorning)
after getting the 3 children down to sleep
my wife showed me some new clothes she had bought
(with subscribers generous subscriptions, of course )
and i was quite taken…
maybe that is not the quite the right word
but anyway….
wake up this morning kissing my wife
open my eyes
and there is scarlet watching me mournfully
i thought kids would be happy to see parents kissing
but not little bloody sk
who starts to writhe and groan
real tears!
and everything
just coz daddy kissed mummy good morning
christ! sometimes youre just wrong whatever you do
i get up and take scarlet back in to the doodles
hey evie
i gotta delivery for ya
evie goodnaturedly n half asleep makes room for the woofle
whose kicking n growling like little tassie devil in a trap
she goes into the doodles bed roughly
but they envelope her in their warm sleepiness
and eventually
as i walk back to my room
i hear her protests gradually diminish into silence
believe me
if you wake up early on a saturday
and youre kissing your little sweetie good morning
the last thing you want in yer face
is an angry little moaning woofle
lets see what saturday will bring…
all of you in my thoughts

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