posted on December 18, 2007 at 4:16 am

hello faithful friend
truly this western world
has formed my mind
and it has made it so so hard
to embrace the paradox
sweet lord jesus
calm and magnificent buddha
gorgeous krishna
inexorable vishnu
fiery shiva
saraswati playing a fender jazz
the goddess of fortune
her hands spitting gold coins
all of you who exist
yet do not exist
certainly not merely existing
lend me your hands
help me to…..
i cant quite…
the world and my own mind are doing my head in
my fire is burning
i am angry and flushed
the summer
my own pitta nature
the ringing deafened ears
my lack of humility
my lack of patience
my own loud music
my intensity of thought
my focus
my dedication to yoga
which is magic in another guise
my constant penchant for wreck-re-ational drucks
my burning needs
my smouldering hatreds
my feverish aspirations
my scalding scolding tongue
that wags this way and that
my addiction to the ocean
oh i love her i love her so much
respect her
fear her
i try to feel her
i try to ride her
not yet lover boy says the pacific
the atlantic says nothing; she is cold towards me
i know i combine the stupidest and most sublime opposites
i say to you reconcile opposites
you say to me
heal thyself metaphysician
do as you say
not as you do
no i am confused
i seem to contradict myself
even the truth
is the truth what happened while we were lying
i lied about my age
my height
my sex
my nationality
boy will you ever be disappointed
when you crash into the real me
who is now real
a parody of real
cmon stevie boy are you for fuckin’ real man
theres the paradox
a parody and a reality can be inseparable
its the exception that proves the rule every time
and you know how many rules there are
so thatsa lotta exceptions
anything proves anything
nothing proves nothing
i aint joe schmoe or rimbaud
its funny friends of mine
you all understand and forgive me
the way i cant myself
i dont want your fattening flattery
i want to just be there
in the place you already made for me
in yer heart or wherever you like to think it is
i am now of course talking to my readers
my listeners
however else you absorbed my phantom-like mojo
yes of course we are on this wavelength
and you know i care for each of you
you real readers of mine
i dont have to name names and blames now
you know if youre with me here
paradoxes erupt in me
i am a peaceful man
but i wish the fuckin’ australian and or nz navy
sends a ship down to the south pole
and sinks the first fuckin’ ship that harpoons a whale
and the next
and so on
and so on
until they understand
dont hurt the whales anymore, you greedy sick bastards
with your cynical transparent lies and excuses
the whole world decided NO FUCKING MORE WHALING!
and you know why
if we dont
there will be no more whales
we realised that it is an abominable cruel practice
we realised that the things humans are cutting up for blubber
could actually be smarter than us…..!!!!
i dont wanna spill any human blood
but here i’d make the whalers a promise
then a warning
then i’d see it right through
and fuck em!

someone whos been causing me unnecessary grief
writes to me saying
hows your ear?
cant you understand that you have crossed the line?
always a stranger now i wish to never hear from or about you again
lady, go gently into that good night

sometimes the big fish
says youre just so nice
yet the big fishes little cheeses
try to push ya round….

strange to find a stranger who knows all yer stranger work
stranger still our new guitar tech wife walked down the aisle
fall in love with me
off narcosis plus more and more again
yeah thats a strange wedding song
my fucked up electronic voice telling that sad story
about that man
that charlatan bastard
that lonely stupid addicted monster
hiding in a huge old house
just like mick jagger in performance
but without the women or the “good” drugs
luckily that story was purely fictional
and his wife now a bass player herself
noticed and remarked that i had a bad night at enmore
on the bass and then i knew that she could play
did not have bad night in melbo tho
dear jen you brown jewel
lovely poetess and godmother to my own sweet daughter
what would it avail us to play our hits?
now i please no one
except myself
now i am this olde
i have earned that privilege
if i please them
what would that do?
they wouldnt come and see us again
they wouldnt even buy anything
cept maybe our greatest hits record if that..
so i care nothing for impressing those
who couldnt use their 2 ears
which lord vishnu designed and gave them for free
if they couldnt tell that we were the bees fucking knees
then playing almost with you
aint either
i’d rather
pick up
the stray stranger
who hadnt realised
or had forgotten
that the church
are much more
and much less
than yer average rock band
we have recklessly pursued beauty
through all times and conditions
we have hung together to show you our current take
we are the church
we adhere to rocks great and lofty ambitions
we scorn its self imposed limitations
ive run my race
ive done my bit
ive done it before some of ya were born
i was rocking in some bar in canberra
the capital of this outlandish southern continent
i read jenny browns book about skyhooks
(did i see macainsh outside the forum??)
i rehearsed
i went out n tried to “please” the audience
now im olde and tried
i have invented my own schtick
and then i reinvented it
im a venerable olde diamond aint i?
im a national treasure aint i?
is there a cooler olde codger than me?
is there any one else combining sexy and senile?
i deserved it all talent wise
i didnt deserve nothing as far as being a real man
and i had to suffer
and lo
i did
and i embraced heroin
no longer a paradox
just a spirit who wishes me harm
who is so much stronger than you will ever imagine
now i popped out of all that
im poor
i got loadsa kids
in my own distorted egoistic opinion
i’m doing what few else (can) do (anymore)
and you know its guaranteed to contain 95% love
and it wont be dumbed down
and it wont be western dribble
and it wont be flaccid meaningless awkward cliched shit
it will be me giving ya what i got
and i say i deliver
i will deliver you
with my music my words my voice
see ya later baybee
cos this is what i do
i dont care if i please anybody
i will either jolt you with it
or you wont now or ever “get” it
and now
as i said
who cares?
not me.
yes my friends
the hall of frame would be good in some ways
but bad in others
another paradox
more paradoxes will be forthcoming
lemme embrace

32 Responses to “why killer needs to embrace the paradox”

    Error thrown

    Call to undefined function ereg()