morning fiends
how are ya?
obviously im still pretty broken up bout grant
and all those regretful things that happen
when someone you love dies
like something i didnt tell ya
after grant and i were reconciled last year
a couple of weeks later
grant called…
hi steven, im down here in sydney
oh dear not a good time for me grant…
i gotta do this…
i gotta do that….
but ah, thanks fer callin’
give us a ring tomorrow or something..
grant sounded sad
i knew he probably wouldnt call tomorrow
he hung up sadly…
ok steven, i’ll speak to ya soon…
and that was it
of course
now im not gonna beat myself up for it
how were either of us to know…?
i had other more important things to do…
(yeah, right….what was that…yoga? painting? shopping?)
i missed a last opportunity to hang out with my friend
people always ask me when i play in brissy
is grant coming?
will macca be here tonight?
“ah, i dunno…i didnt call him….maybe”
you see i thought i had all the time in the world
just like the last time i talked to my dad
“sure dad….i’ll catch up with ya later…im a little bizzy right now”
yeah procrastinate
hey we’re all gonna be around forever, right?
now i know that grant, wherever he is
understands and forgives

but ya see where im going with this, dont ya?
if theres someone ya love
and ya feuding…
fer god sake make it up NOW
dont put it off
ring em up
say
“lifes too short, i love ya, lets get together”
cos it could be them
it could be you..
be smart, my fiendss
call em now
whattya got to lose?

lassa nite i listen to snow job
the second frosties album
(grant always called us the frosties)
so different to that first album
the levity has faded somewhat
but with tim powles drumming
this one really rocks
if you do hear this youll notice i dont sing so much
my voice wassa pretty shot with drugs by then
and i was so uninspired i could hardly be bothered
but grant does a great job
and by christ
these songs fucking rock, baybee
listen to grants grreat guitar solos
a lotta pentup energy and raw emotion
he was a sensitive guy who could shake it!!
theres some beautiful songs here
i will no longer avoid this record
the aviatrix, a song about amelia earhardt (spelt wrongly?)
listen to the layers of guitars at the end as they peel off
before polinskis beautiful ambient section….
running from the body
we watched a doco on the mamas n papas
and we both identified with john phillips drug hell
and we were taken by their harmonies
we tried to incorporate those harmonies
intricate…
angela carter
a song about one of my fave authors
grant sings sorrowfully as hed known her personally

you dont know
i wrote the music
grant came up with the words and singing
“you dont know what life is
you dont know where life is taking you…”
sadly prophetic

empire
i love this song
once again i did the music
grant the singing
another message to ab?
“i just wanna know how long
ya gonna keep me locked outta yer empire?”
i just couldnt believe hed come up with lines like that
straight off the cuff
but that was his genius

weightless and wild
wow i actually sing this one
a lonesome fucked up song
“watch me run a crroked mile” i sing
while underneath grant sings
“youve lost the world”

haze
listen to the string of images at end
memories from grants early days
the country doctor going blind
i only just found out grants dad who died when grant
was very small
was a doctor

grant was haunted by his dead father
i guess he never met
i remember one night in new york when we were playing
grant came running into the dressing room
youll never guess whos here, steven?
who grant who?
he got a strange look in his eyes
“our fathers, steven, our fathers are here…”
mmm, i’ll never forget the way that made me feel
for a second i wanted to believe it…

that was grant
funny and sad at the same time
he wasnt a saint and he had some wicked putdowns
and sometimes he could seem a little snooty
he could nae abide swearing
nor did he like dirty jokes

i dunno
i dunno
i dunno
his funeral is on friday in brisbane
how am i gonna see lindy and amanda and robert
without completely losing my nonexistent composure
i dont wanna go to grants funeral
i wanna go up there
and see him appear
glass of red wine in his hand
grin on his face

grant was on the front page of the sydney morning herald yessaday
i KNOW that woulda given him a kick
just like i said once
youll become immortal on the day that ya die…

anyway ya gotta say he went out onna good one
he beat the chchur to win his aria award
(we beat streets of my town in89)
he had some money from his emi deal
he was doing pretty goode
i wish id come across him at “rics” in new farm, bris
drinking his ice teas and smoking his stuyvos
i’d wrap my arms around him
and say
grantley, i had the strangest dream…..

but now thats too late

if there is someone in yer life like that
let em know
sk