The Time Being | Steve Kilbey

well
the rain fell down down
on sydney town
and i
for the time being
dreaming mid the drops
so i close the door to my mind
lay down deep in sleep
while my body of otherness
at work on the wild world beyond
places eluding time
black wet thorns and wrought iron
leafy places and soft comfortable rooms
the furniture wraps around you in slumber
a fire burns
tho you dimly remember thats its summer
summer back there
this is your england you say to yourself
no england in this world tho
you smile to yourself steven
and you drink your milky tea
and the rain drizzles and dribbles
puddles surge with tiny ripples
oh its so quiet here beside the fire with your cat
your cat sits on your lap purring
your hat sits on the mat blurring
and the fire crackles
the wood shifts with a tiny lift
the flames are nimble and quick
the music is old time
the colours are the muted greens and browns of distant childhoods
everything is worn to a smooth burr
gently pointillistic like the cats fur
this is my england you say to yourself
and a someone is playing the piano forte in another room
and its a lady called jessie bellette
and she says why stephen what did you do to your eye…?
and i say oh jessie ….
and my eyesight is so dimmed in my right eye now
i say i hurt my eye when spring jumped out the back of time
and i say i hurt my eye in the long long war
what were you fighting for ? says jessie bellette
and she holds you close in her big strong arms
and she clasps you to her ample bosom
and she says
this is your england only for you
a knock at the door
oh its leslie….!
leslie comes in
his marine cap at a jaunty angle
the everpresent rothmans cigarette
the skinny loose limbs of youth
we just won the war mum he says
thats good dear she says and we all have another cup of tea
in the kitchen i find mince tarts and chutney
i find teddy bear biscuits and cream of tomato soup
i find yorkshire pudding and dolly mixtures
i find bread and butter pudding and custard
i find trifles and gollywog jam
the rain falls on and on
how could the thin air hold so much water
how could the morning contain such a night
how could the past stand such a future

ok ok
lemme get this straight
i steve kilbey
incarnated on this planet earth
and the date is february something 2010
anna domino
they say i’m a singer
and i’m singing with my band on 17 n 18 this munth
canberra n sydney
they say im doing america april to may
they say i’m gonna paint this picture n appear in this film
and talk to this newspaper
and be a good father
and get my mirror fixed
and find my license
and give up the bad
take up the new
finally hit the dentist
oh boy i need 5 crowns n a root canal
man my teeth are costing me my teeth
i look at em today
as dentist shows me photos inside my mouth
he uses words like crumble, chipped, holes, decay, brittle
5 new crowns X $1700 equals oh no change the subject
i get some gas at least today as he cleans my teeth with machine
he says you dont need gas to clean your teeth
i say hey you gimme the gas
i get the gas
i wonder how to define it when suddenly its all over
leaves me feeling kinda giddy n weird
i’d like to do my own experiments
(a la pd ouspensky)
well its raining in sydney
warm grey rainy day
finished notes for boxset
got back my facebook
and had 3 serfs executed for stealing adjectives
been listening to the supremes a lot
got new gb3 album but it wont go in my ipod
because i guess the pre-mastered gb3 album is in there
and it thinks theyre the same
oh boy i’m kinda worn out now
bye

eden
flowers
warm afternoon
new pink shrub gains foothold
port jackson fig green n leafy
raindrops keep falling
on my head a crown of cloud
at my feet a meeting of the rivers
black panther lying asleep at my side
the focus tightens
the subject moves
incredible shape shifting music starts up all around
we cut up guitars and from their seeds come ukuleles
and baby wo-mandolins
even sand is wildly fertile
the dunes sprout the egress and the lyre
the rumbling sea provides the nascent foam
and out rolls that cute little aphrodite
and her retinue of nymph o’maniacs
the trees are a buzz of the long dead bees
and the ponds are a blur of the long gone frogs
but no that is the future i keep remembering
those are the voices of the dead i hear in the empty corridor
these are shapes yet never to ever come
things that ought n ought not
wine yes drink yourself into your pleasant stupor
clothed in leaves you leave your clothes
the grey afternoon caresses your calves
the grey afternoon tugs at the snake
the grey afternoon seeps into the crack
the grey afternoon is found balled up in a fork
precious doves alight in flame
the cherubim is a man/woman/bird/thing
eat your delicious teeth
please dont handle the fruit
make your selection before opening
a woodland creature does the tigris bop
a faun at dawn wriggles on euphrates drops
with a spurned fawn and goldie n silver horn
marc is there too our wonderful brownskin man
and merry old jehovah
(for t’is He….!)
says
look
i am zeus
i am jupiter
i am woden
i am allah
i am ammon
i am i am not
i am He who am the only one!
you see
everybody just wants to get down
krishna on flute
chiron the centaur horses around saying hay you hay you
the gorgon arrives turning the guests into stoners
the great dragon Avarice is conjured by the secret controllers
the moon has been sold off…its official
donald (no) trumps signed the deal yesterday pacific time 13.13
the moon has been towed off to house a new radar station
it has been bought by a consortium of merchant bankers
please adjust your calenders now
full moons will be charged on a per view basis
february has been contracted yet again despite cooling off period
aurora lights up
eve eats her apple
scarlet is left in the red
the afternoon is tangible
it tickles your vain fancy
it relieves itself slowly emptying into a stormy night
the electrons in my negative ions are going bada bing bing bing
zing went the strings of my harp
ping went my empires engine
something was pinging like a voice singing
thats all thats it
all over
every bit

forget fullness
i sailed a long way to forget it all
night and day you may be
but now i want to forget both
why dont you harness your selves to the next big wind
i have no cupboards to contain your woes
one too many men
to not enough man
men themselves are mostly fools like me
we have nothing to teach you except hurt
a quick slap down when youre trying to get up
cruel wicked selfish…ha!…those are our goodsides
enough conundrums
enough hoops
enough second minute chances
you cannot eat your words
everything down here is bound to fail
everyplace down here will crumble and decay
everyone down here is temporary and on loan
and i really do have my books n poetry to protect me
and my disciplines
and my in with fate
and my luck of the poor devil
and if you call that luck
eat my dust, you insensitive fuck
oh i am the want
oh i am the deed
oh i am the end
om namah shiva
om namah shiva
om namah shiva
i got the shivas down my back bone
i’m shaking all over
well i see my face in the mirror
which one day you may never see again
no reflection on me of course
and i realise how desirable desire is
and i realize that sometimes i hate love
and i realize that i am alone
in some bizarre world where all the denizens are insane
and how they left me hanging in the gardens in babylon
and how i lost my part in greece the musical
and how about that
and how about this
osama obama bonaparte
melts down the poles
unleashes the kraken who gets crackin’ crackin’ skulls
my dad will be in some room playing a piano
he’ll say : hey slim whatdid i tell ya?
dont martyr me matey
i’m too chicken to be christ or anti-christ
i’m cutting away the thorns of intrigue
i turn around angrily and i say
verily now i just wanted a quiet life
at this remark
canned laughter bursts forth upon the speakers
what speakers i ask surprised
i didnt know there was speakers…
at this juncture the host of the show appears
and says
and now some important messages from our sponsors
impatient lee you hit the remote
chop n change thru the chanels
the english channel and the vietnamese channel
and channel oh and channel won and channel too
a re-run of that hit comedy signed feld
(the mark of (co) cain)
an old war movie oh a bit non pc
(the cold steel they dont like it up em!)
a show about al o’saurus
(with the bits that steve took)
a re-run of bewitched
( mr n mrs stevens!?)
why doesnt old endorra go easy on poor darrin
(lord knows he tries….doesnt he….)
12000 leagues under the sea
(up from the murky depths the giants quid….!)
brave kirk douglas who begot michael douglas
who begot port douglas
who begot port and starboard sides
who begot a big river mouth
and raved on like a frustrated soul
in the house of the mad
boy you make my bubble tea in-plode
girl electric witch limp in societys ditch
where is my human childe?
and scarlet comes forth
and says
here i am
are you a child ? i ask her
yes she says solemnly
are you a human child?
yes she says seriously
i am a human child
good i say
good good
good

2 good things however
autumn andel a filmmaker has made an
excellent vid to go with
all is one
by k/k
i had almost forgotten martin had mentioned that autumn was to do it
i had seen her whiskey marine and thought it was pretty good
and then i kinda forgot that there was a vid on its way
anyway today i get the link
oh wow
i didnt think anyone could interpret that song
but autumn has actually added poignancy to the whole thing
NO MEAN FEAT!
i am very very hard to make happy with stuff like this
i hereby declare best vid ever of one of my songs
part swirling van go go-ey liquid painting
part allegory
part tear jerker
part cosmic fable
amazing attention to detail
my wife watched it 3 times n cried everytime
so did i (believe it or not)
usually i cry in frustration
but this unusual and beautiful video
will make even the hardest heart soften
autumn here is your golden time being award for excellence
i think martin might put up a link real real soon
you gotta see this one!
meanwhile
the new tibor has non working cd player
no jack in for yer ipod
so i been listening to the radio
i heard a song i liked a few times
it seems to be getting a real caning
i found out it was australian group the temper trap
i know im pathetically behind the times
but i really love this band
downloaded cd from i tunes
its pretty good its pretty more-ish
its pretty uplifting n soulful n youthful
i check their myspace page
my lord these guys are already huge
playing 3 sold out nights at a big london gig
watch their video
the lead singer is an indonesian guy
not what i was expecting
but i can see how he could be a huge star
lovely high melodious voice
their vid has had almost 4 million watches
meanwhile bad thing
ac/dc
bear in mind i saw brian johnson play in canberra
in 1973
in some little club
he had a band called geordie n he wore a stripey jumpsuit
i believe he even in those days
wore that dreadful hat
that presumably covers either his bald head
or some weird growth (or both)
he was old even then he seemed to me
a nudge nudge wink wink hows yer father type
bloody orrible
i also saw acdc with their very 1st singer(dave evans)
in a tiny canberra pub
there were about 7 people there
malcom young was dressed up like a keystone cop
i kinda liked ac/dc with bon scott
he was a charming lovable rogue, eh?
but i cannae abide them as they are
so unbelievably silly
so silly that silly old sod
singing those silly old songs
and all those young boys watching them
freud would have a ball with the symbolism
his voice is like listening to calico tearing slowly
a screeching phlegmy cackle n grunt
his words are puerile obvious monotonous tripe
his look
is like hes lived on egg n bacon n beer for a hundred years
and yet
these guys sell out the megadome in 2 seconds flat
80,000 tickets in a moment
why?
its so fucking embarrassing with the cannon and stuff
all those teenage lads listening to some old grandad
boasting about some cartoon bawdy escapade he supposedly had
actually
i cant really see an ugly little old sod like him getting laid that much
can you?
am i too harsh?
i just cant understand how anyone could enjoy
this awful amateur carryon
but theyre the biggest band in the world
maybe i should buy a fucking satchel……

this illusion hurts so bad
i carry anxiety expectations insults n lies
i dish em out n i wear em
i love being fire until i get burned myself
i hold it all in
kilbey you liar
kilbey you bastard
kilbey you cheat
kilbey you fraud
kilbey you has been
kilbey you fool
kilbey you prick
kilbey you old
kilbey you brute
kilbey you coward
kilbey you motherfucker
i hold it all in
my heart n throat dont wanna talk any more love
my heart doesnt want to know
all my ups n downs arent getting me up or down no moor
i reach out
i lash out
i thrash about
on an impulse i go to see wendy the white witch
she can see whats wrong with me
does her magical thing for 2 hours which i can feel
witch i can feel
i come out much lighter
i still angry but now i can bear it
angry with who you may ask
angry with myself i have to answer
because of everything
i dont need no one else to ever be angry with me
i’m so angry with myself
thats the trouble with troubled geniuses
and its even the trouble with me
not a cheerful loving lovely ray of light
but a turbulent deep n shallow sea full of monsters n mirages
no use telling me to lighten up cos surely you got the wrong blogg
i am a hotblooded fiery creative self righteous brother
i like things my way or see ya later
when i heat up i burn baby i burn
when i cool down i ice baby i ice
i believe things arent as simple as they seem
i think we are duped and tricked n manipulated
all of us
by our leaders
by our children
by our parents
by our husbands n wives
by each other
i wish i could get my hands on some truth
i’m sorry
i dont trust no one
NO ONE!