The Time Being | Steve Kilbey

in this photo clare bowditch, adalita and your ‘umble ‘ero

rockwiz the live show is over
ive got a complete doco up my sleeve but that’ll be for my new
impending mega-site ….eh, kip mcc?
itll have footage backstage onstage etc etc

the rock wiz people are amazing
the crew were amazing
the rock wiz orkestra …crikey what a band….!
my fellow singers…what a great bunch
the audiences were too kind and just fantastic
the whole experience was fucking groovy
everyone so cool n calm
not one jerk
not one grumpy tosser
not one idiot
please have me back
i loved it
it was a breath of fresh air
melby was a great place to finish
vika bull was a dream to sing with
her voice always in tune and strong
i had a ball
a very very happy camper i am
love to all
steve-0

eventually
you on your own
fooling round with a camera in an empty room
or being born again
or walking along some pier stretching across leaden waters
you see people in restaurants drinking booze n eating cuisine nouveau
you see homeless wrecks shivering in the winter afternoon
you see the snobs and slobs and blobs the bits n bobs
betrayed delayed afraid
calm now in determination
hysteria not for me
flowery words wilting on the page
promises become threats
i walk along and i laugh to myself
i walk along thru the endless ages
the son of man
getting warmer getting colder
i need no one
i need no food no drug no orgasm no money
self contained self restrained
i look for nothing
yet i see everything
i am a singer in a show
i appear n i go
surrounded by flash and bang
i am a stillpoint
i look out at you all
i sing from a million miles
under pressure
burns a building down
splits a family in 2
puts people on the street
i read my name in the paper
my current name that is
i realize more n more that is not me
over a double barrel
inside a double helix
i sit with the performers and talk
i joke with the crew
i pause in the limelight
never so weak or powerful
double your trouble back guarantee
disgracefully graceful
i even confuse myself
head on ism
oh i only feel the cold
good calm cold
the grim winter
the dumb summer
the double edged sword
the panther in his winter
i’m not your 20th century man oh no
an unknown in an unknown land
its quiet i talk to myself
finally someone who makes sense
my double whispers in that drawling accent
half english half australian half asleep
half life
double shot
clear headed
across between fox and cat
i purr with my phlegmy engine
my calves sacrificed to the bitter wind
i cough up tears
i cry blood
i leave my body : a trial separation
i wanted to be like everybody else but it was never on
a unique nobody i blow down acland street
double back
buy a coffee
buy some time
double time
sick of women sick of men
double sick double cured
i licked smack
i smacked lick
i fought my own double
and was double whipped
i double and redouble your bid
my head is an entertainment centre
i book seats at my own show
black n white double features
orpheus comes n goes through mirrors
ulysses in his black beaked ship
siegfried drenched in dragon blood
joe schmoe at some karaoke night
good with words
bad with numbers
double 6 double 6 double 6
dabbles with doubles
i leave my body again
i leave your body again
i always loved jesus
i meet him in the darkening park
we sit in stony silence
until its time for me to go in
my mother calls me….listen :
steven…..
steven…..
i enter by the stage door
some grizzled ex angel nods and winks
fucking singers he thinks …what a joke….
i go down deep into the orchestra pit
where my lyre is waiting to tell its lies
music sweet music
sing us a song your the lyre man
and make it a double
and make it on the double
and then
double up
twice

i sing the bloody eclectic
i sing the unsingable song
i sing of crete and concrete and the discrete layers of life
i sing of the underworld and the overdrive
i sing of hashish i sing of myrrh
i sing of aphrodites ichor
i sing of enkidus fur
i sing of the garden now barred
i sing of men ill-starred
i sing of whores and virgins and hags and beauties
i sing the deepest song of the seven seas
and the seven seals
and the seven dwarves
and seven years of bad luck
and seventy seven sunset strip
i sing of dillinger and derringer and delicates and doom
i sing of zeus amon and white hippy moses and burning bushes
i sing you asleep
i sing you awake
i sing to your skins and your hearts
i sing of seances and ectoplasm
i sing dimensions i sing spells
i sing unaccompanied i sing with birds
i sing badly i sing well
i sing roughly
i sing smoothly
i sing and i croon and i shout it all out
i sing even if no one listens
i sing even if no one hears
i sing to the sailors and soldiers
i sing to the head neck and shoulders
i sing to the stones and the boulders
i sing to myself in the shower
i sing and i vaguely can remember the power
i sing to arcturus to antares to sirius to andromeda
i sing childhood in
i sing old age out
i sing the chemical nuptials
i sing the storm i sing the calm
i sing in the vibrating dawn
i sing wordless
i sing epic tales in sanskrit and greek and english and swedish
i sing the mahabharata i sing the gospels
i sing dr seuss and dr dee and dr death and dr my eyes
i sing with my heart i sing with my soul
i sing without remembering in amnesias black hold
i sing to my mothers i sing to my brothers
i sing to you and any others
i sing to macbeth and miranda and to lear and round here
i sing the milky way and i sing the hard way
and i sing the old ways and old days
i sing the hits and misses
i sing young and old
i sing and i stop and i sing once again
i sing glam classical mineral gnostic and inner country
i sing with gb3 and the 3 fates and the 3 norns
i sing sometimes with my 2 horns
i sing hell and i sing well and i sing in one fell swoop
i sing bohemia i sing in my deleria
i sing in the school cafeteria
i sing in corpuscles and bacteria
i sing in sickness and in health
in poverty and in wealth
i sing in this life in last life in everylife
i sing everyman i sing for no one
i sing for profit prophet and for fucking fun
i sing as i come undone
i sing U#23 i sing only for me
i sing for thee
i sing and i begin
i sing anything everything
i sing what no one else can or will sing
i sing for eurydice i sing for medea
i sing for my supper and i sing on some upper
i sing in my slippers
i sing for day trippers and night riders
i sing the hurt inside us
i sing as my muse bids
i sing for the bedsit kids
i sing soundless and groundless and endless
i sing the sacred i sing the ephemeral
i sing the horrible and the terrible
i sing to keep the outside out
and the inside in
i sing of virtue and sin
i sing of cabbages and kings
and whether pigs have wings
and i sing the things the darkness will bring
and when its all over
still
even then
i sing

sing then o muse
sing of my wanderings
sing of my lost years
sing of my other lives
sing of athene who came to me in waking dreams
sing of my ship and the star who guided her
sing of the cities of the plain destroyed by a jealous god
sing of nineveh cold and forgotten
sing of enkidu dying of fever
sing of grant mclennan and david mccomb who sing no more
sing of baby krsna with the universe in his mouth
sing of houdini and the great cagliostro
sing of my strangling hands and trampling feet
sing of leslie kilbey 18 and in germany 1940
sing of joyce bennett in the ruins of london
sing of eris and her golden apple inscribed kallisti
sing of aegypt and her long centuries in the sun
sing of saint-saens and scrubby stokes
sing of lemuria and lyneham
sing of monsters n mirages
sing of mustard gas and barbed wire
sing of opium sing of nepenthe
sing of wine sing of mead
sing of loki who shudders forever until ragnarok
sing of elli n minna sing of eve n aurora
sing of my bass guitar sing of my lyre
sing of the christ up on the kings cross
sing of hannibal barca and his dark troubled brow
sing of joan who shone like an arc where you walk
sing of kennedy and sing of lincoln
sing of the tower of babel and the towering infernal
sing of 666 and 911
sing of the elusive grail and the knights templar
sing of heroes and cowards and cowherds and vrindavan
sing of the red sea and the blue tide and the green man
sing of the war of the roses and sing of the jackals of war
sing of cemeteries sing of nurseries
sing of solomon who sings his own song
sing of lyonesse between england and france
sing of the planet between earth and mars
sing of jagger and jesse james and john the baptist
sing of marathon and sing of alexander
sing of the lion headed sphinx and sing of oedipal hi jinks
sing of glenn miller sing of tom miller sing of henry miller
sing of hoaxes and hexes and executive decisions
sing of the axe and the scalpel
sing of the time and the distance
sing of narnia and sing of charn
sing of the bermuda triangle and the blackest hole
sing of mark feld and david jones
sing of erskine and sad conesuela
sing of trees sing of bach sing of amadeus in the dark
sing of jeff buckley who sang like a lark
sing of breton sing of normandy
sing of the wind singing through the longest night
sing of ern malley and sing of bin laden
sing of the mermen and sing of the mainmen
sing of the haunted
sing of the unforgiven
sing of the dead still singing for a living
sing of the animals that were butchered today
sing of the world behind my eyes
sing of sydney sing of sumeria sing of esoterica
sing of impossible things the phoenix and the roc
sing of the dark cages and sing of the rhymeless reason
sing of saturn and satan and black satin sheets
sing of murder and sing of mayhem
sing o muse
let the singing begin
sing in my veins
sing in my head
sing in my fingers
sing in my soul
sing o muse
and let your song be ever so long
unending unbending
unbelievable
undeniable
undying
undone
sing o muse
let the singing begin
then
sing it all
again n again

after a long time
after life has moved on
and the blasted shadows have faded from the path
and the children grew up and could see for themselves
and their children live in the fertile valleys surrounded by snowy peaks
and the kings have departed to seek empires elsewhere
along silk routes and longitudes unmapped and uncharted
and new stars have appeared in the sky
and new skies have dawned in mornings i wont see
and the ocean still churns restlessly at the foot of its bed
and my head is cleared
all bad memories deleted
and i am exonerated of my sins
and my good deeds rewarded
and my reward is to know everything that was unknown
everything i could stand to know that is
and i stand holding my hand that god has dealt out
and the four angels of the four cardinal directions
golden haired neither male nor female come down to this plane
and i count the grains of sand
and i see the sparrowfall
and i hear the language of the trees
and i swim with the nereids
and i behold vishnu in his universal form
and i walk with jesus on my kentucky blue lawn
and i am soothed by venus who ceases to mourn
and ride with the valkyries out of this storm
my men are gone and never to return
my snow has melted
and my fire has burned
every lesson finally learned
some lovely day
some blessed eve
some wonderful spring
the women sing
a song
i cannot write but long to hear
maybe then
you will appear

tori n me
take scarlet for a walk
i guess we’re in dakota or wyoming or somewhere
the lonesome whistle blowing down the trestle: ooooeeee
its the 1950s everything all black n white
no beatles
no internet
no tiramisu
no aioli
no dice
john dee in the dried out river bed
playing some old chuck berry number
and skyping his angel within the crystal ball
some gunslinger
dock holiday
or wild bill
still holding the deadmans hand
americana
toris a waitress at joes cafe
i just been laid off by the mining company
times are tough
maybe this is a dream
no…maybe not…
its always 3 o’clock on some fall afternoon
the clouds are ominous
my heart is heavy
a burnt out ford customline
a rattle snake in the dust
nothing for miles n miles
horizon disappears behind the black hills
we dont say much
tori answers my questions with a shake of her head
or an uh-huh
shes wearing her one good dress
the one her daddy bought for her in bismarck
i’m wearing my old suit patched n worn shiny
i got ten bucks in my pocket that i clutch for consolation
life is harsh
we always seem to be sad
are you sad ? i ask her
she shakes her head
are you happy here ? i ask her
she looks at the silent slag heaps and circling distant black birds
uh-huh she says so quietly
i was thinking i could get us a piano …i suggest
uh-huh she says
maybe you could learn to play i say
uh-huh she says her eyes glassy and lost
we walk back into town
the saloon has closed down
and the train dont pass this way anymore
i scratch my head squinting into the dull glare
what you gonna do now ? i ask her
she shakes her head
and the wind gently blows tiny whirlpools of dust down mainstreet

my dear friend in colleague
jeffrey cain is on his way to australia
arriving june 29
to start n finish isidore #2
maybe you have or havent heard isidore #1 yet
its a very melodic smooth kind of record
jeffrey wrote the music
i came up with the vox
we make a good team
jeffrey writes tricky chord progressions
at once familiar yet with a sense of the strange
it inspires me to come up with words i wouldnt normally
have come up with…
hes renting a flat here in bondi n we can ‘ave a winter swim n a sauna
n get stuck into our work
jeffrey is an impish alabaman with a wicked laugh n kind heart
like martin kennedy and ricky maymi hes much younger than me
and was inspired in his teen years by the church among others
hes absorbed his sk musical lessons well
and thoroughly transmuted them into his own lovely trip
we will both be mourning the loss of gregory slay isidores drummer
who died on new years eve tragically too young
mr slays radiant and mischievous spirit
will illuminate proceedings i’m sure….
the first isidore record heralded a new era for my singing n words
i turned some corner in making it
finding new ways to sing
new types of words to write
i am lucky to have collaborateurs such as jc n these other guys
so you got gb3 coming real soon (its a corker…mixed by jorden brebach too!)
then kk2
then hopefully i can get david neil finally fixed n mixed (thats with ricky)
then isidore2 which i know will be a special record
melbournian fiendss can look for me next week
although i cant necessarily spill the beans on what it is i’m doing
as i am merely one of a number of special secret guests at 2 shows there
(at the palais….)
yep i’m pretty busy
and thats how i like it

great new book arrived on my desk
my immortal by anakki mayhem
an australian coastal teenage vampire love story (what?)
available on amazon now

regards to dave rundle my novocastrian china plate
put the box set kk dvd and ato cheque (bastards!!) in the mail today

thats it
a long weekend here in sydney but dunno why
see ya then
sk

today received new kk dvd
nice one!
the total live kk experience
(in tuxedos!)
featuring evil graham lee on pedal steel
n michael evans-barker on drums n perc
here we are live at the toff
(oooh is that diamanda galah my one true fan in the front row?)
old crooner me with the crows feet n scuffed up blunnies
mutton kennedy the modest maestro concentrating on his gig
i tell you its not a bad old vid
we play our entire 1st album n
give under the milfy weigh the kk treatment
plus providence
plus exclusive sneaky preview of kk2 with “the demo”
speaking of witch
i been listening to today
and its almost finally ready
martin has again come up with some music
which is just so right for your old ‘umble hero
to stick his rag tag grab bag of lyrical tricks on top of
(oooh ended a sentence with a preposition!)
the songs are a lot more eclectic than the 1st record
some bloody good hummable tunes
with mks inimitable touch
and your old groaners smooth voice
which causes savage beasts to be soothed
and old grandma groupies to faint in their wooly stockings
wow! it really is a great record n i want ya to hear it right now…
but ya gonna have to wait
so have some patients
songs about the esoteric hodge podge
and the friction when you enter this atmosphere
you gonna love it
why bother arguing?
its at least probably the best record ever made
and thats just an understatement
it will enlighten you while it enlivens you
the sad songs’ll make ya happy
n the slow songs’ll make ya fast
kennedy is the antipodean eno
and i’m the equivalent of lying in a bath of opium
whilst reading baudelaire and shakespeare and patanjali
with yer eyes tied behind your back
doubtless it’ll go to number one all round the world
coz people here can appreciate our subtle brilliance
(when the footballs over…of course)
send me a thousand bucks now n i’ll reserve you a copy, cats
mucho love
or watt ever
kilb-0

my brother russell
recommended i read this book called
the secret history of the world
an esoteric trawl thru the philosophies
of the secret societies that exist n have existed…
to put it all in a simplistic nutshell
mind before matter

long before anything else
there was the boy
a boy born out of time n place
growing up in australia in the fifties n sixties
i read alice in wonderland n alice thru the looking glass
when i was 5 or 6 n i was gone
then the greek myths, the norse myths, the celtic myths
then the chronicles of narnia
(frequently referred to by t.s.h.o.t.w.)
this was my world
the world of spirit
the world of magic
the world of imagination
more real to me
than the humdrum ordinary one
in which i never felt right or at home
anyway the narnian chronicles blew my tiny mind
and a lot of the secret encoded (rosicrucian) information
went straight thru to my heart n soul
(and verily i grokked it!)
i could never turn back from here on in
i could never be an ordinary person happily living
in the ordinary world
(cue duran duran ; no, please dont!)
then came lord of the rings
gormenghast
psychedelic rock
drugs etc
i have read the bible the koran
the bhagavad gita
and almost got thru the 18 volume srimad bhagavatam
the hindu secret doctrine or as krsna puts it to arjuna
the most confidential information
i have read extensively on yoga
i have read buddhas the path of dharma
and many other esoteric and exoteric treatises on or by the buddha
of course as you all know too well
i have been doing yoga on n off for almost 25 years
the last 5 years very intently n intensely
all of my study is confirmed in this book
mind before matter
mind over matter
all esoteric literature has to be interpreted
like poetry
like heiroglyphs
like sunsets
and life and death
and astrology and alchemy
you cant solve this stuff literally
you need some strange inclination
which i have in spades
finally
my own work
thirty odd years of songs packed full of esoterica
messages puzzles clues
random name dropping of things i had no real idea about
its all there for you to see
hardly any stuff about the ordinary world
i have poured my heart n soul into the surrealism of it all
my music my words my paintings n now my blogs
dedicated to the marvellous in the mundane
finding the strangeness n charm on this plane
i dont believe in jehovah i dont believe in darwinian evolution
i dont believe in a one way scientific world
i dont believe its all for nothing either
i visit a healer
who 5 hundred years ago would have been burnt at the stake
she manipulates my chakras and tells me impossible things about myself
she works away on me without touching me “as if by magic”
healing the damage i have done to myself
occasionally she chuckles :
“sometimes i cant believe i’m doing it, myself”
my life has shown me karma in action
bad things come back
good things come back
inevitability is, well, inevitable
baby baby i was born to boogie sang marco boleyn
n fuck me he sure was
i reject the plausible sensible scientific christian explanations
i embrace the weird and wonderful meanings i feel n i sense
when i write music
it all flows to me
appearing in my mind fully formed
music is magic
yoga is magic
life is magic
i dream n i yearn for the inexplicable
i devote my life n my work to its exploration
i dunno what i’m doing but i know i’m meant to do it
i heartily recommend this book by jonathan black
if you like what i do
i know you’ll love it
thanks rusty n amy
i’m thoroughly enjoying the read
abra fucking ca dabra !

dearly beloved and devoted readers
sunday morning here in sydney
i get up do my yoga
practice my chi gong
think things thru
its a lovely sunny morning
full of the future