The Time Being | Steve Kilbey

1. i wake up 2 weeks ago with the name sid rumpo in my head
sid rumpo were an aussie band that made one record i never heard
back in the early seventies …but i dont know anything about them
nor have i ever thought of them before. that day i fly down to melbourne
to do rockwiz finale and whilst on the plane i read about goethe
and his theory of interconnectedness
then i meet famed oz rocker angry anderson from rose tattoo
and we share a limo into town
on the way there i ask about his previous band buster brown
i say : you guys musta been one of the 1st bands on mushroom records
yeah says angry us n a band called sid rumpo
wow i say i thought of that name this morning when i woke up
wow says angry thats an example of interconnectedness
(a double synchronicity there folks)
2. i go to wendy the white witch for a healing
she gives me a cd of the lords prayer related to chakra healing
when i get in the car all relaxed
i put on the radio n on comes the first song
dirty deeds done dirt cheap by ac/dc (a jarring juxtaposition )
i immediately turn it off
when i get home n stick cd into my itunes
my itunes erroneously recognises the cd as dirty deeds done dirt cheap
(huh!!!!)
3 jeffrey cain turns up today
hes rented a flat in bondi
its the same flats marty lived in 30 years ago when he first moved to aust
weird, eh?

i have changed
i have thrown off my last shackle
which was holding me down
which was dulling my senses
i am clear i am calm
i know now what i am here to do
i am growing younger by the minute
the hours pass peacefully
i want for nothing
my luck has changed
my mood has improved
i see the wonder
i hear the beauty
i entertain the possibilities
i exist in all dimensions
no longer impatient
no longer exasperated
aware exactly of who i am
i see through lies
i see through fakes and frauds
i appreciate the sheer beauty of life
my children amaze me
the future stretches out before me
and i want to fill it with music and paintings and words
invitations pouring in thick and fast
i stuck to my guns
i guess this is the reward for authenticity
i will prevail eventually
my good self will prevail over my bad self
i have some dear and lovely friends
like jeffrey cain who arrives on tuesday armed with beautiful music
i am immersed in my work and The Work
i am convinced things will turn out well for me
i am finally back on the path where i shoulda been
the path my own path
a path no one else could ever tread
i have to do things the hard way that is my path
but i always learn…eventually…
i will learn to master myself
i will learn to get all this art and music out of my head
and out of the void
and lay it on you all for as long as i can
because…well…who else can…?
i am content with my contradictions
they make me who i am
i will strive for excellence from now on
i will not flinch from personal sacrifice to create for you
i dive deep and i soar high
it is enough
i can wait and wait and wait
i remember everything from the past
my intuition is thawing
my heart is open
my head is no longer dead
i wish for no material thing
i desire no woman
i need no man
i am self sufficient
from here on out
let no stupid thing disturb me
do what you like
say what you like
write what you like
i am steve kilbey the time being
its sunday evening
everything is ok

from
the lamb lies down on broadway … by genesis
a rock opera about a modern odysseus
his name is rael hes a graffiti artist from puerto rico
but the story takes place in new york
this album was genesis’ full flowering and their final masterpiece
before peter gabriel left
rael is trapped in some mystical nightmare/quest
after many adventures he comes to a strange chamber
waiting for him are the lamia
creatures straight out of greek mythology
the bodies of snakes , the faces of women
the music is superb
by this stage of the game
the interplay between tony banks on keys
and steve hacket on guitar is unique and almost classical
in its ambitions and proportions…..
banks the master of the constant arpeggio
hacket using his guitar like trumpets and french horns
as far away from yer usual hamfisted rock fodder as you can get
gabriels lyrics are pure poetry
his voice is mysterious powerful earthy and pure
lost in some 5th dimensional labyrinth
our hero rael comes along a hall and finds
the chamber and a pool containing the lamia
a beautiful lilting piano sets the scene
occasionally punctuated
in small instrumental sequences by gabriels flute
“inside a long rosewater pool is shrouded by fine mist”
“but ripples on the sweeping water reveal some company unthought of”
“3 vermilion snakes with female face the smallest motion filled with grace”
they greet him
“rael welcome we are the lamia of the pool
we have been waiting for our waters to bring you cool”
the music is spine tingling and gorgeous
everything just perfect
building to a wagnerian like crescendo
the guitar darting in and out of the grandiose mellotron
then back down to a lonely piano figure
like something out of rachmaninoff
rael decides to join them
“he slips into the nectar leaving his shredded clothes behind”
“with their tongues they test taste and judge all that is mine”
gabriel now switches into the first person as he does throughout
the whole of the lamb
he is rael and he is also the narrator
“they move in a series of caresses that glide up n down my spine”
the lamia begin to eat rael
as the lamia in greek myth devours its own children
“as they nibble the fruit of my flesh i feel no pain
only a magic that a name would stain”
(what a beautiful line!)
but something is amiss
the unlucky rael is too profane for these creatures…
“with the 1st drop of my blood in my veins
their faces are convulsed in mortal pain
the fairest cries
” we all have loved you rael!””
“each empty snake like body floats
silent sorrow in empty boats
a sickly sourness fills the room
the bitter harvest of a dying bloom”
rael decides to eat their bodies
” oh lamia your flesh that remains i will take as my food”
then a very strange line
“it is the scent of garlic which lingers on my chocolate fingers”
then an instrumental interlude
the piano and portamento synth intertwine
then a stately organ appears like bach or something
rael says
“looking behind me
the waters turn icy blue
the lights are dimmed
and once again
the stage is set for you”
then flute guitar and mellotron go out in a magnificent coda
wow
well
the meaning of all this?
the esoteric symbolism
the beauty sadness and triumph
and yet
its a fantastic example of how arcane and spiritual rock can be
the opposite of ac/dc or their meatheaded ilk
this music this song is loaded with inspiration for thought
you can listen to it for 36 years like me
and still get that hit of the wonderful unknown
the hairs on yer neck will stand to attention everytime
an eldritch thrill
the sexual cannibalistic myth of the lamia
the fucking lovely music
gabriels perfect singing
go on
you better get this one now and prepare to start digging it
HARD!

a 24 carat stunner
released in 1984 or thereabouts
credited to this mortal coil
this was really the cocteau twins in disguise
the song written by tim buckley
who of course is jeffs dad
i never really grokked tim buckley
i tried but i could never really dig him
i prefer mortal coils version so much more than his
its a bare minimalistic performance
a chiming guitar like a bell at sea
elisabeth frazers (or is it elizabeth fraser?)mournful voice
her wonderful phrasing
the string thing playing in the background
truly conveys a sense of supernatural longing aching love loss
the sirens were creatures from the odyssey
with beautiful voices whose song was irresistible
they lured sailors to the island where they died upon the rocks….
of course
our hero odysseus wanted/needed to hear these songs for himself
his sailors stuffed their ears with beeswax
while odysseus
was tied to his ships mast so he can listen
my whole life i have wondered
what these terrible songs must have sounded like
what incredible words must they have sung to him
this song turns things around
it is a song TO the siren
rather than a song BY them
the odyssey metaphor is kept up through the song
with its marine lyrics
“the shipless oceans”
“as riddled as the tide”
“now my foolish boat is leaning”
etc
and the song works on many levels of meaning
as all good songs should
including the ultra strange question
“were you hare when i was fox?”
all filled with such sad bewildered unfulfilled desire
“oh my heart, oh my heart shies from the sorrow”
this song captured me the first time i heard it 26 years ago
and it still holds me to this very day
bleak lonely desolate just like odysseus’ long journey home
sacred majestic magical stuff
the video on youtube is so so
youre better off to just hear it
and imagine the awful love which inspired this amazing piece
odysseus says :
“this was the sweet song the Sirens sang
and my heart was filled with such longing to listen
that i ordered my men to set me free, gesturing with my eyebrows
but they swung forward over their oars and rowed ahead
and they jumped up and tightened my ropes and added more…”
circe the witch who was odysseus’ lover warns :
“there is no homecoming for the man who draws near them unawares
and hears their voices
no welcome from his wife
no little children brightening at their fathers return…”
wow!
god how i would love to hear those songs
incredible!

remember that bit in my biography
where i’m walking down the school hall at lunchtime
and i hear a kid playing the guitar
and i blah blah blah blah
yeah
well the song the kid was playing was called atlantis
he taught me the chords too (my first chord progression!)
they are C D F C G
i felt as if i had learnt a spell
the spell still has not worn off
even after 40 years
now most pop music is a load of old rubbish
uh huh aint it the truth
meaningless tripe knocked out to try n make a buck
the kinda thing you listen to once and never again
however
once in a while someone writes something so good n powerful
it can stay with ya forever n forever
atlantis by donovan is such a song
in spades my my oh my word
i always liked donovan
he was a big influence on my uber-hero marc bolan
when i first heard this song back in 69 or 70 it floored me
a feeling of sacredness pervades the simple chords
donovan starts talking over the gentle strumming
the most beautiful delicate scottish accent imaginable
he rolls his Rs
and the whole thing has an air of the most confidential information
the continent of atlantis was an island
which lay before the great flood
in the area we now call the atlantic ocean…
(well
i was instantly hooked
he goes on to amazingly tell the story of atlantis so succinctly
as a piano chimes in playing the wistful melody)
so great an area of land that those beautiful sailors
journeyed to the north and south americas with ease
in their ships with painted sails
to the east africa was her neighbour across a short strait of sea miles
the great egyptian age is but a remnant of atlantean culture…
(yes it is …ask herodotus !)
the narrative continues:
the ante diluvian kings colonised the world
all the gods who play in the mythological dramas
in all legends from all lands were from fair atlantis
(all spoken so carefully in that wonderful soft accent)
knowing her fate
atlantis sent out ships to the four corners of the world
on board were the 12
the poet the physician the farmer the scientist the magician
and the other so called gods of our legends
tho gods they were
and as the elders of our time choose to remain blind
let us rejoice and lets us sing and dance
and ring in the new
HAIL ATLANTIS!
this is followed by a good old fashioned hey jude ending
with pounding drums and piano and electric guitar
while donovan sings
way down below the ocean where i wanna be she may be
fucking brilliant!
meaningful
longing
great tune
great production
and sending me off into an atlantean obsession
wow
imagine if all the stuff you heard on the radio was like this…
and it was in the charts….!
life changing pop music…whooda thunk it?
now go n download it if ya aint got it
and dig this fairly accurate history of atlantis
in the shape of a 4 minute spell

last nite played in band for jimmy little
famous indigenous oldtime aust singer was given award
at some big do here in sydney
temper trap rightly won an award for their marvellous sweet disposition
the usual bloated ratbags and music biz parasites were there
rabbiting on with their usual codswallop
who cares?
but hurrah for jimmy and hurrah for the temper trap!
jeffrey cain arrives in under a week and we will do some swimming
and some singing and knock out isidore 2
have just been offered a great part in a brand new very funny musical
will let you know more as details come to hand
martin k n i have put the wraps on new kk
its finished and its a corker!!
many other goodies in pipeline stay tuned
watch this space
steve-0

*
its too early to tell
i cast my fate in the sand
the sea is calm
the sky is blue and grey
my eyes see through you
winter solstice
who will you resurrect?
i walk forever on this strand
the gulls squabble
the tiny waves leave foam
music plays in my head as always
words come into mind
the shortest day of the year
night threatens day
the king in check
the queen moves along her most convenient diagonal
path of least resistance…as is her wantonness….
the pawns oblivious as usual
the bishops ….oh what a crooked bunch
they burn joan of arc
they burn wendy the white witch
they burn your mother and your sister
the knights…ha ha
on some wild goose chase through the forest
lancelot in ms guineveres chamber with his trusty sword
galahad all golden lost in lyonesse
sir parsifal tries to staunch the blood of the fishy king
sir isaac newton battling gravity
sir mick jagger poncing about like a ninny
meanwhile your narrator lonely at the top
the temptation of st steven
martyred by the slings n arrows of outrageous 4tune
staggering neath the wait
words music paintings fill my echoing skull
chip on my shoulder coated in ancient grease
my enchantment undone
i strip off my armour
and languish in chapel perilous
i fail the test again n again
my own external exam
3 x 7 = 21

* tarot card by my dear friend MEM

rest in pieces
some otherworld
some before n afterlife
wind sings in the reeds
reeds sing in the wind
everything i touch turns to spirit
no winter here
the forest is alive
the waving fields of wheat and barley
golden summer day stretch endlessly
purple summer night move through me
friend, swim in cool lakes of dream
etruscan wife
she tramples the bursting grape
horses crop the grass contentedly
my scars heal leaving a silver mark on the brown skin
my children play out there in the dusk
i can hear their plainsong
i can feel their pleasure
the different stars shine in the sky
the different birds sing in the different trees
midnight comes without darkness
noon arrives without its heat
mercy in my hands to bestow
patience in my heart to choose
my patron goddess hidden in clear view
pallas athena swift as light
move towards me smiling still
lily white
eyes black as night
hair lustrous falling in coils of jet
wielding wisdom as her shield
evenings of marvel
mornings of grace

soft succinct and sweet
sugar bloom
through cold clear water i swim as if in dream
ionian sea or astral soul river
where my muse doth wait
whispering wordless words only i can hear
spirit come and take me now
oh spirit come and fill me now
dark matter intoxication null and void
i have wasted these 55
now i stand here empty handed outside this door
i cannot pound it down
i cannot find my way in
i am freezing out here in this outside
i knock and knock half heartedly
inside the 4 chambers my muse lies waiting patiently for me
havent i given thee enough? she dreams to me
you never worked for even one of my gifts… she gently chides
so why then do you now bang bang bang on the door to my chambers?
i fumble in my pockets for some key
i roar and whimper and call her nameless names
the names she has always had
all my lives all my days
youre trying too hard she admonishes
let it be easy as its always been
try not to grasp and gasp and blow your chances mind
believe and believe and trust and trust
oh its so close now
oh its still so far away
she smiles
i see her smile of invisibility
i hear her melodious laugh
yes she says
i think this time you really might make it
how? i ask
sacrifice everything ! comes the answer in my chances mind
everything? i ask
oh it will all be returned one thousandfold …her voice very faint now
like a thought that lingers fleetingly
like a childhood memory of being so warm and safe
like falling in love with life
like hearing the most beautiful music
as if from an impossible distance
as if coming from all directions
like krsnas flute in the twilight jungle
like jesus lovely laugh in the aromatic garden
like aslans mighty song
that awoke all things
on the very first day

a friend of little girls and their grandmothers
i roam these gloomy woods
in my wolfsuit
growling and howling
oh heel you dirty dog
fur all flecked with grey
always hungry
in these forests of saxony and prussia
my long yellow-white teeth same colour as moon
my black eyes which shine no light
devouring pilgrims in a single bite
my rough tongue which licks you raw
my lupine mind outside the door
as still as this i hide
under your bed
its 1215
how i love your bones
loose in the convent
salivating and waiting
hunted for my pelt
i melt into the snow
i feel no cold
padding silently away
to feast another day
come good doctor
i bet you taste so nice
and woodcutters
your axes blunt
i dont think
i move
i jump with a mighty leap on the back of the slowest sheep
and i creep towards you in your sleep
my poor paws with their bastard claws
my tongue so long and red
amongst the pines amongst the weeds
dribble as the young knight bleeds
no trap could hold me
my jaws clamp shut
oh little princess in this dark place
gaze with horror
‘pon my face
your friars your priests your men-at-arms
your saviour on the cross
your bishops in aachen
your kings at mass
your mother says her parrot prayers
your brothers rushing down the stairs
he’ll have my guts on this he swears
i know a little cave you could get warm
i’ll take you there…no i insist…look its really no trouble..
please follow me
the evening close is falling down so swiftly
and i’m starving
i’m ravenous
i’m as empty as all hell
i need to feed
you need to rest
i know whats best
you’d do as well…
mmmm
ok
delicious
in my dingly dell